You’re only as old as you feel (complete waste of time) (609 hits)
Category: GeneralRating: 1.57 on 22 reviews (Rate this item) (V)
Submitted by kre8rix (View user info) at 2005-07-20 13:25:54 EDT
It's an adage that we are all familiar with, though I don't know how many people actually take the time to think about how old they feel.
There are some days, when I'm overwhelmed with work and bills that I feel so old I try to call the retirement home and see how soon I can book a room. Apparently, they go by how old you are physically.
Goddamn ageist bastards.
I think most of the time, I'm around 7-8 years old. I have a massive toy collection, and I play with them daily. Sometimes I even let my three-year-old play with me. I get fully engrossed in comic books and imagine myself to have the abilities of the characters involved (personally, I think it would be badass to be Carnage from Spiderman; that dude is badass).
I'll sit at my desk and carve intricate designs in the walls with heat vision. I stopped paying for cable T.V. after what I like to call "The decline of modern Saturday morning cartoons". I drive my car like I'm in Gran Turismo, and often see the advantage (especially in traffic) of having heat seeking missiles mounted beneath my headlights. I also had a great idea on how to change the color of my car at the push of a button, should I ever find myself being chased by Libyans.
I live in a small town in the middle of nowhere, AZ because when the world gets blown up/zombies take over/ Armageddon, I'll have a better chance to survive and fight whatever caused the destruction of the world, because this town is hardly a target; nor does it hold any strategic military advantage.
So my question to you, oh denizens of Uber, is how old do you feel?
I apologize for lack of something interesting. I am just killing time as I am waiting for the GODDAMN VOTING TO BE OVER!!
Stupid Ubermadness...
User Reviews
Submitted by Alter (user info) at 2007-09-26 22:29:07 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
No, Comment.
Submitted by Kre8rix (user info) at 2005-07-22 10:32:02 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Nope, Face First. #2
Submitted by thecaes (user info) at 2005-07-22 00:56:53 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Wait! Things Left Unsaid, right?? Entry 1?
Dude your story was better -- or at least, smarter. You gotta fill me in on some of those other things the lead character witnessed.
If in fact, this is you.
Submitted by thecaes (user info) at 2005-07-22 00:54:07 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Kre8rix (user info) at 2005-07-21 10:12:06 (#)
Ranking: 0
Yeah you read mine, and you actually voted for mine too (thanks). Mine is one of the really really close match ups and it looks like I'm going to lose by about 4 votes. If you're familiar at all with my writing style, it's pretty obvious which one I wrote.
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Well fucking tell me which one it is then.
Submitted by Kre8rix (user info) at 2005-07-21 10:12:06 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by thecaes (user info) at 2005-07-21 01:15:42 (#)
Ranking: 2
wait..the ratings that we give Ubermadness posts count against the authors? How? I've been giving straight zeros because I thought it didn't matter...the submitter is "Ubermadness".
I hope I read your post, dude. I missed a lot of them because, well, 64 posts is a lot.
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I think that the post counts as a Zero in your total stats until the voting is over. Then it's moved to the 'my uber' section with a default score of 2 until someone rates it as an individual post.
I read that somewhere I just don't remember where.
Yeah you read mine, and you actually voted for mine too (thanks). Mine is one of the really really close match ups and it looks like I'm going to lose by about 4 votes. If you're familiar at all with my writing style, it's pretty obvious which one I wrote.
Submitted by thecaes (user info) at 2005-07-21 01:15:42 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Kre8rix (user info) at 2005-07-20 13:52:46 (#)
Ranking: 0
It was actually a steady 1.86, but my UM entry dropped the average.
At least until it gets added to 'my Uber' or whatever.
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Wait...the ratings that we give Ubermadness posts count against the authors? How? I've been giving straight zeros because I thought it didn't matter...the submitter is "Ubermadness".
I hope I read your post, dude. I missed a lot of them because, well, 64 posts is a lot.
Submitted by Kre8rix (user info) at 2005-07-20 23:42:02 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Goddammit
I'm totally getting bumped in the first round.
lame...
Submitted by whiskey_jack (user info) at 2005-07-20 17:53:49 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Carnage is cool. But I think I'd like to be Knight Rider. Now thats a lot of badass.
Submitted by Kre8rix (user info) at 2005-07-20 16:40:50 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
how did you break your leg dude?
Submitted by Sassmasterr (user info) at 2005-07-20 16:13:06 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
since my leg is broken, i feel like a frail old man. before this, i felt invincible.
Submitted by forensicgirl3 (user info) at 2005-07-20 16:03:31 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Physically I still feel as though I'm in my twenties; mentally I sometimes feel a lot older because my schedule is so hectic, also because I have to act professional (more or less) at the Uni and at my job.
Therefore I play on the internet and let my id run wild.
Submitted by ShadowFacsimile (user info) at 2005-07-20 15:30:59 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by Vulva (user info) at 2005-07-20 14:56:02 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
If it didn't tell you then you should back off, cause it will take doers to get those stuffs done in enough time. Otherwise the council will start to bring them all back to here...not there. You know what I am sayin man?
Submitted by Xcuses (user info) at 2005-07-20 13:54:22 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Fighting with fags from the internet makes me feel like a teenager all over again.
Submitted by Kre8rix (user info) at 2005-07-20 13:53:52 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
and it's also because only about 7-8 people rate my stuff on a regular basis.
People don't like to read stuff with 'part 22' in the title.
I'm a long winded bastard
Submitted by Kre8rix (user info) at 2005-07-20 13:52:46 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
It was actually a steady 1.86, but my UM entry dropped the average.
At least until it gets added to 'my Uber' or whatever.
Submitted by Vulva (user info) at 2005-07-20 13:49:54 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Even your shitty posts get good ratings...hmmm
1.8 career avg = impressive
Submitted by Kre8rix (user info) at 2005-07-20 13:47:00 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Boredom has indeed taken over at this point.
Though I should probably do some work while I'm here...
Submitted by Sphagnum (user info) at 2005-07-20 13:38:59 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I don't feel old, I just feel bored....
Submitted by nitty34 (user info) at 2005-07-20 13:31:19 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
The front page is a barren wasteland thanks to the joy that is Ubermadness.
The first day seemed like a week. And the second day seemed like five days. And the third day seemed like a week again. And the fourth day seemed like eight days. But the fifth day, you went to see your mother and that seemed just like a day. But then you came back and later on the sixth day in the evening when we saw each other-- that started seeming like two days. So in the evening it seemed like two days spilling over into the next day and that started seeming like four days. So at the end of the sixth on into the seventh day that seemed like a total of five days. And the sixth day seemed like a week and a half.
That's how old I feel.
Submitted by Unabonger (user info) at 2005-07-20 13:31:15 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
i'm 8. and i want to be a jedi when i grow up...or a dinosaur.
Submitted by morontian (user info) at 2005-07-20 13:29:58 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I'm stuck at fourteen. As far as work goes, I grew up on a farm, so that's as natural as breathing.