whatever (640 hits)
Category: NoneRating: 0.92 on 19 reviews (Rate this item) (V)
Submitted by ruthless (View user info) at 2005-07-21 12:47:35 EDT
I am in one of those strange, unexplainable moods. The kind of mood where I know I want something, but don't know what it is. The kind of mood where I want absolutely nothing, but feel so restless it's as if my bones are trying to jump out of my skin of their own accord. I want to throw myself on the floor and pound my fists on the carpet and wail and scream and cry and claw your eyes out.
This is the kind of mood where you and he overlap and I can barely tell you apart. Should I run? I ran last time. Ran and ran and ran; for 7 long years I've been running. He's still there though; I can't get away from him. Who knew he could run faster than me?
The kind of mood where I look at our relationship from behind the sights of a loaded gun, and I'm not afraid to use it.
If I still smoked my apartment would be littered with empty cigarette packs. At least I can have the whiskey. I haven't denied myself that pleasure yet. And why have I done this, denied myself the pleasure of smoking? I know I had great reasons, but right now I can't remember them.
This is the kind of mood that dictates I do not speak unless spoken to, and then only in monosyllables. This baffles you for some reason. Don't you understand that sometimes I just need to be quiet? Don't you ever want to just be in your own head for awhile? The only person I want to talk to is that person who communicates through my speakers, crooning and stroking with a voice dripping with honeyed sex and doe-eyed sadness.
This is the kind of mood where I could stand in front of the mirror and examine my eyes for hours. They are green and brown and gold and squinting against the light from the too-warm heat lamp.
My mind is filled with racecar beds and exploding animals and sticky fingers and penguins and why won't she see reason and how can I make him love me and visions of terrified faces in the mirror. Mine. Mine. Mine. Houses and rings and scuba diving and macabre corpses dressed in wedding finery and bodies clutching and writhing and moaning and bank statements and divorce papers.
And no one will understand this but you.
User Reviews
Submitted by thorpe (user info) at 2006-01-11 18:37:38 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by minimumdino (user info) at 2006-01-11 15:16:35 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
fuck yourself its cheaper
Submitted by kaos-king (user info) at 2005-07-30 01:26:16 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by ruthless (user info) at 2005-07-22 18:12:49 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
I'm sure that someday lightning will strike again.
Until then... I know I've got more old stuff I can post.
I'll see what I can find.
Submitted by A-Daamage (user info) at 2005-07-22 16:40:13 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Wait, this is old? Shit. Where'd that fire go? Rekindle it. I want more of this.
Submitted by A-Daamage (user info) at 2005-07-22 16:37:50 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
There it is. You found your voice. This was fucking exquisite.
Submitted by mikethescottish (user info) at 2005-07-22 05:04:02 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Interesting. Liked the way you combined imagery at the end.
Submitted by Ducky (user info) at 2005-07-22 04:29:03 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I like the way you write.
Submitted by ruthless (user info) at 2005-07-21 19:48:45 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by loki (user info) at 2005-07-21 13:08:01 (#)
Ranking: 1
EMO
that's right I said EMO
========================
Oh yeah. Emotion-fueled idiocy.
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2005-07-21 13:27:00 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Sucking on my wangeroo would probably help cheer you up, little lady.
Let me know.
Submitted by ellsmall (user info) at 2005-07-21 13:19:04 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
lizzards are cool
Submitted by themuscleman (user info) at 2005-07-21 13:09:21 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
hot
Submitted by loki (user info) at 2005-07-21 13:08:01 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
EMO
that's right I said EMO
Submitted by GodChicken (user info) at 2005-07-21 13:02:29 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Gecko is humping your face!
Glad to hear all is well. it is thursday, yes. I bought a surfboard last night and got out there for about 2 hours, until the sun went down. Feel great.
Submitted by Xcuses (user info) at 2005-07-21 12:59:43 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
me confusious
Submitted by ruthless (user info) at 2005-07-21 12:56:54 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Monty, this is actually pretty old... everything is peachy, i just happened to run across this in my files and decided, what the hell? It is Thursday, after all.
And how 'bout that gecko, huh?
Submitted by Unabonger (user info) at 2005-07-21 12:54:36 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
me too.
+1 though i'm not smiling.
Submitted by GodChicken (user info) at 2005-07-21 12:53:16 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Sounds like you need a weekend to yourself. Hope you haven't moved in yet.
The ready-made family thing is really hard, I did it once before. it would be nice if you could finally come to a truce with the kids, or just knock her the fuck out next time she crosses you.
Submitted by nitty34 (user info) at 2005-07-21 12:51:28 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
My mind is currently on my bank statement as well.
fucking hookers