The Future of Ubersite is in peril (935 hits)
Category: GeneralRating: 1.84 on 25 reviews (Rate this item) (V)
Submitted by Stabkill (View user info) at 2005-07-22 14:42:54 EDT
I called Bart up and told him that I won 4 tickets to a Chicago Cubs baseball game from WGN and asked if he wanted them because I couldn't go. It is to an upcoming series against the Cardinals, so I wasn't too happy about not being able to go; but why let the tickets go to waste?
He accepted the free tickets and I arranged to drop them off. When I arrived, he offered to buy me lunch in appreciation for the hard-to-get seats against a very popular Chicago Cubs rival.
I was in no hurry to get back, so I accepted his offer and he decided he would drive to a place he thought was pretty good.
I noticed a bunch of children playing at a daycare near the side of the road on all kinds of toys. It was odd to me, as I am not from a large city which, quite honestly, are filled with idiots like this. How can one allow children to play so close to the road?
"Hey, Bart. I'll give you 4 more cubs tickets if you mow those children down." I joked with him.
He had a serious look on his face while I laughed. I guess the joke flopped. That was until I was violently pulled in my seat as the belt locked me in and Bart's Jeep veered toward the day care which I had pointed out.
Needless to say, four children were struck and severely injured. A couple of them are not expected to survive as they are in surgery right now.
I walked away as quickly as I could, figuring I'll just take a taxi back to my car and leave Bart to deal with that fiasco on his own. He started shouting "You owe me those tickets!" As the police stuffed him in a cruiser.
Oh, what will become of ubersite now?
User Reviews
Submitted by HighFructoseCornSyrup (user info) at 2005-10-03 04:37:47 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by c1ndy (user info) at 2005-08-22 06:43:31 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
poor old bart
Submitted by spedmonkey (user info) at 2005-07-23 20:34:02 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by MichaelJackson (user info) at 2005-07-22 16:30:50 (#)
Ranking: 2
NO BART BART! HOW COULD YOU! THINK OF THE CHILDREN <weeps>
-------------------
You only like 'em live, huh? Even Michael has his limits.
Submitted by d_prime (user info) at 2005-07-23 20:06:07 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
hahaha
Submitted by Danger_Ranger (user info) at 2005-07-23 01:29:00 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
It's all good, Stabkill. Bart just rang and handed over moderator duties to me again.
"Uh, Danger?"
"Yes sir?"
"Don't go removing the hits this time.."
"No sir! I am going to remove thorpe and williamson."
"Did you ring my lawyer?"
"No, I rang your mum."
"Listen dickhead, I only get one call and I'm using it on you. I NEED you to ring my lawyer."
"Yes sir!"
"Good. And Danger?"
"Yes?"
"Don't forget. I know how easily you get distracted.."
"Don't worry, ba... hey! Look! A plane!"
"Danger? ........... Danger!!! ........... DAINNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNN-JARRRRRRRRRRRRRrrrrrrrr....."
Submitted by Captain_Cool (user info) at 2005-07-23 00:35:56 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
NOT BART!!!
Submitted by Viciousriffs (user info) at 2005-07-22 18:19:40 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Don't worry about me, X. I'm getting my drink on, and everything will be JUST FINE.
Submitted by The_Yellow_Dart (user info) at 2005-07-22 17:40:32 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by knucklesnelson (user info) at 2005-07-22 17:12:02 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by munkeypants (user info) at 2005-07-22 16:48:20 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
that does look like his jeep...
Submitted by kaos-king (user info) at 2005-07-22 16:42:51 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by MichaelJackson (user info) at 2005-07-22 16:30:50 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
NO BART BART! HOW COULD YOU! THINK OF THE CHILDREN <weeps>
Submitted by Xcuses (user info) at 2005-07-22 16:23:51 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Vicious, Cubs are just fine...keep your panties on
You know what I could use right now.
A campfire, lots of alcohol and herbs
and vicious rippin' off some riffs at a 'comfortable' frequency
maybe some smores too!!!
Submitted by RandytheHelpfulPineapple (user info) at 2005-07-22 16:12:53 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Go Sox. (the real Sox, not those wannabe Red Sox that copied our name)
Submitted by a_reader (user info) at 2005-07-22 16:04:36 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
97 years of Chicago Cubs futility will do that to a fan.
My god the Cubs really do suck.
Submitted by Viciousriffs (user info) at 2005-07-22 15:44:57 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Pretty nice, Stabby. This is a winner.
X- fuck you man, the Cubbies rock.
Submitted by Mr-Boo (user info) at 2005-07-22 15:28:14 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Poor BartBart. Don't drop the soap.
Submitted by Xcuses (user info) at 2005-07-22 15:27:51 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
You did him a favor. The cubs suck and you saved him from having to watch them. He should be thanking you.
Submitted by Average_Dan (user info) at 2005-07-22 15:27:31 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Good pic!
Good Tale!
Submitted by Mike00295 (user info) at 2005-07-22 15:02:49 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Kids kinda suck anyway.
Submitted by c1ndy (user info) at 2005-07-22 15:02:20 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
poor old jailed BartBart.
Submitted by UrbaneMischief (user info) at 2005-07-22 14:55:35 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by Ivy (user info) at 2005-07-22 14:48:15 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
Bart! That's not very nice now is it? Poor little screaming babies, as if shitting their pants daily wasn't enough of a pain in the arse.
Submitted by nitty34 (user info) at 2005-07-22 14:44:32 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
That's a shame.
Odds are one of those kids was my bastard son.
Thank you, child support fairy!
Submitted by Adamdidit2u (user info) at 2005-07-22 14:44:05 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
You're always getting Senor Bart Bart into trouble