Are You Retarded? (898 hits)
Category: NewsRating: 0.43 on 15 reviews (Rate this item) (V)
Submitted by MegaManfre (View user info) at 2005-07-25 09:51:01 EDT
Are you stupid? Got a 70 or less on that last IQ test? Wear a helmet every day? On the 8 year plan in HS? Well have no fear, that lil handicapped license plate not only ensures a front row parking spot at the mall, but its also a Get-Off-Death-Row-Free ticket. Youve heard Get-Out-Of-Jail cards, now we show you the Get-Off-Death-Row-Free ticket, and all you have to do, is be a fucking moron. Thats right, any moron can get off death row now.
Why? Because the Supreme Court stated that if youre a fuck tard, then you dont get killed for any crime. Now, to be legally considered a fuck tard, you have to pass a rigorous test, which is fairly simple to pass. Its an IQ test, and so long as you just stare at it, crap your pants, and smear the shit all over the paper, you can go on a killing spree, and park right up front at the K-Mart you buy your rifles at.
Now you must be thinking to yourself, "Hey Rick, Im stupid, but how do I know if Im retarded? I never took an IQ test before." I say this in response, "You dont need to you fucking idiot, all you have to do is pound your chest and scream 'IVE GOT MAIL! YAYYYY!' over and over again, until they just say 'Aw how cute, that retart has mail' shortly before shooting them in the face with your 12 gauge."
A month ago today, Supreme Court Judges said "Hey, if youre retarded, you too can kill a person and not be placed on death row" because they had nothing better to do, other than wonder if stupid people should be killed for killing other people. They essentially took the survival of the fittest law, and crapped all over it, ate it, threw it up, and shit on it again, because they feel if youre just a fucking idiot, you can get off with murder, and just sit in a padded room. Thats right, a room where anywhere you lay down, its nice and comfy. Its also white, which makes it look rather spacious.
So before you go out and kill all those idiots that piss you off, make sure you never took an IQ test, and if you havent, make sure that you plea mentally retarded, and just pull out whatever sexual reproductive organs you have, and piss all over the place when you take it. Then you can sit in a nice comfy padded cell, and get some free meals, room and board.
You fucking retarts should all be killed.
User Reviews
Submitted by Manfre (user info) at 2005-07-25 13:17:02 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Berty (user info) at 2005-07-25 10:21:38 (#)
Ranking: -2
I'm going to assume your a young person, perhaps even still locked away in the educational system and just bristling to show your worth to the world. I, as the worlds herald, will give you a life enhancing experience. I want you to beat up a mentally ill person tommorow. Go out, find one and beat them.
Make them bleed, make them cry, make them beg for mercy. Now don't worry you won't get in too much trouble. As long as you don't get carried away, don't shatter his (or her) face or any thing, just push them around, knock them to the ground or something. Maybe take their wallet if they have one. You won't get sentanced too much, if you get anything at all. If your in a school you'll get your ass chewed out but certainly no criminal proceedings so go nuts.
Trust me on this; you will feel like a big man. You'll feel ten feet tall, you'll feel like the son of God.
Wait, it gets better. You can treat anyone like that and feel like a big man, it doesn't matter who they are. Beat the shit out of drunk people in bars, beat the shit out of your freinds, beat the shit out of your girlfreind/wife. It'll be great and you'll never feel so alive.
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Retarded people were put here for our amusement, and for the easy kills.
Frag the weak, hurl the dead.
Submitted by HadToBeDone (user info) at 2005-07-25 10:17:23 (#)
Ranking: -1
You fucking retarts should all be killed.
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Coming from a guy who can't spell retard. And who keeps spacing fucktard. Welcome to the front of the line, idiot.
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So, when you say retart, you enunciate the D? Normally I just say tart.
Submitted by GaidinCanuck (user info) at 2005-07-25 10:51:56 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
That is pretty retarded.
Submitted by Teephphah (user info) at 2005-07-25 10:46:05 EDT (#)
Ranking: -1
Submitted by HadToBeDone (user info) at 2005-07-25 10:17:23 (#)
Ranking: -1
You fucking retarts should all be killed.
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Coming from a guy who can't spell retard. And who keeps spacing fucktard. Welcome to the front of the line, idiot.
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I gotta go with Hadley on this one.
Submitted by Dead_0hi0_Sky (user info) at 2005-07-25 10:36:55 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
ugh.
Submitted by Mr.Tinkle (user info) at 2005-07-25 10:31:02 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
MY fdmoomy says im pecscial. im not retardxed.
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2005-07-25 10:30:25 EDT (#)
Ranking: -1
This dipshit must be their fearless leader.
Submitted by Berty (user info) at 2005-07-25 10:21:38 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
I'm going to assume your a young person, perhaps even still locked away in the educational system and just bristling to show your worth to the world. I, as the worlds herald, will give you a life enhancing experience. I want you to beat up a mentally ill person tommorow. Go out, find one and beat them.
Make them bleed, make them cry, make them beg for mercy. Now don't worry you won't get in too much trouble. As long as you don't get carried away, don't shatter his (or her) face or any thing, just push them around, knock them to the ground or something. Maybe take their wallet if they have one. You won't get sentanced too much, if you get anything at all. If your in a school you'll get your ass chewed out but certainly no criminal proceedings so go nuts.
Trust me on this; you will feel like a big man. You'll feel ten feet tall, you'll feel like the son of God.
Wait, it gets better. You can treat anyone like that and feel like a big man, it doesn't matter who they are. Beat the shit out of drunk people in bars, beat the shit out of your freinds, beat the shit out of your girlfreind/wife. It'll be great and you'll never feel so alive.
Submitted by MyNameIsTim (user info) at 2005-07-25 10:20:55 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
i en joyed it
Submitted by HadToBeDone (user info) at 2005-07-25 10:17:23 EDT (#)
Ranking: -1
You fucking retarts should all be killed.
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Coming from a guy who can't spell retard. And who keeps spacing fucktard. Welcome to the front of the line, idiot.
Submitted by Unabonger (user info) at 2005-07-25 10:15:55 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
i agree. "took the survival of the fittest law and crapped all over it...etc"
why should we let stupid people live at all? seems to me they're proving they're stupid when they do this...thank you for showing us your limited abilities! Now we can kill you and not lose sleep over it!
Submitted by Bellebrown (user info) at 2005-07-25 10:11:40 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I think I agree with MegaMan with his outrage.
If you do naughty things you should face the punishment.
Screw the seven year old excuse; and what do we care anyway - what do seven year olds contribute to society? (Finger paintings don't count).
OH my GOD.
I am turning into my father...
Submitted by Adamdidit2u (user info) at 2005-07-25 10:07:49 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
KILL EM ALL!
Submitted by DonkeyOnTheEdge (user info) at 2005-07-25 09:57:15 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Most people aren't retarded, they are either really fucking smart, or just incredibly stupid.
Submitted by funk_boy (user info) at 2005-07-25 09:55:05 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
this has reminded me of
'supergreg'
Submitted by JMG114 (user info) at 2005-07-25 09:53:22 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Well, if a developmentally disabled person has the IQ of a seven year old, reasons like a seven year old, and murders with the mind of a seven year old, then I don't think he or she ought to be executed, either.
That picture is really funny.