Bats in the Belfry: From there to here (Prologue) (642 hits)
Category: Quotes & StoriesRating: 2 on 11 reviews (Rate this item) (V)
Submitted by Bats_in_the_Belfry (View user info) at 2005-08-01 18:54:34 EDT
Author's Note: This a nonfiction work in progress and with this post I am merely attempting to start to set the scene for the meat of my story. Continuation will depend on if it seems as if anyone wants to read more.
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The starting point came far before the breaking point, years before. As a teenager, even as a small boy, I knew that there was something abnormal about me, I just didn't know what. I thought for a time that maybe it was because I was a Jehovah's Witness while virtually all of my classmates were not. Well, after I finished high school at the age of 16, quit the religion and moved out of my parent's house, I expected things to be different: I would fit in by force of my charisma, that I would adapt to this world that was all new to me and most prominently, through my use of drugs and alcohol I would be able to compensate for my previously unexplained rapid and frequent swings in mood.
The mood swings, which were later diagnosed as Bipolar Affective Disorder, began at quite an early age. Doctors say that this illness' symptoms usually manifest when the patient is in their late teens or, more frequently, their early twenties. Personally, I can remember recognizing them distinctly by the age of eleven. I recall one day out on the sandlot, playing baseball with some of my Jehovah's Witness friends and their fathers and feeling quite good, on top of the world even. So at that moment, I prayed silently to God to "please let me stay in this good mood", so as to fully enjoy the entire game.
So, yes it started young.
Until the age of twelve, I did not really grasp the effect that alcohol could have on some people. As far as I knew, most drank it for the taste (such as I loved lemonade, for the sapidity it holds for most children) some just seemed to get a little silly too, after imbibing a bit. Then one day while on vacation at St. George Island, I had a few fingers of my father's Wild Turkey Bourbon. Lo and behold, a few minutes later I knew why I, if no one else, wanted to drink: it made me feel damn good. That was where it started.
I continued to drink as often as I could and that was no problem because my parents always kept a stock of liquor in the house for me to pilfer from, same as with the parents of most of my friends. Suffice it to say, my young friends and I got quite drunk all the time, starting at the ages of twelve and thirteen and continuing on, well, forever, it seemed.
At fifteen years old, I started smoking marijuana, and boy... I thought I had found my reason for living. It was the answer to all my problems and it made me feel so good, much better than booze. My taking up grass coincided with my first foray into the world of sex with girls and it was a rather short training period followed by a long, storied love- affair with both.
About this time, I was arrested for the first time and the charges were serious. Since the details are largely unimportant in regards to the part of my life I want to relate, I will merely say this: I rode in a stolen car and took a gun. The rest, as they say, is history.
Because sex outside of marriage, drug use, drunkenness and law breaking are violations of Jehovah's Witness tenets, I was also in trouble with the 'Elders' of the congregation. I, with my father, had several private meetings with these Elders, where I was compelled to tell them all that I was so ashamed of and then had the utmost pleasure of hearing from them why, based on scripture, the things I had done were very wrong and the way that God viewed them. They informed me of the possibility of my being 'disfellowshipped' from the congregation and asked me what, if anything I would do if such a circumstance came to pass. Well, being far from ready to give up drugs and sex (what fifteen year old boy is) but not wanting to be expelled from the only social group I had ever truly had, I told them that I would make every effort possible to come back to the faith, through proper actions.
They decided to publicly reprove me, a reprieve of sorts, but one that came with a public humiliation in the form of an announcement from the stage notifying the congregants of my having transgressed but, having shown sufficient repentance, their decision was to allow me to remain in the congregation. Needless to say, for whatever reason, I felt I had done no wrong and saw no problem with continuing my life as it was, with no need to make any changes.
So I did.
User Reviews
Submitted by DanielH (user info) at 2005-08-02 12:50:37 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Our childhoods are more alike than I can believe, or than you would. (Do continue. +++)
Submitted by Insanethemind (user info) at 2005-08-02 12:28:40 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
yeah it was a nightmare, but it wasn't really as bad as some of what my other (non jw) friends have been through (e.g. parents smoking crack, beating the shit out of them )
As for the alcohol, jws drink, they are just not supposed to drink to excess.
Everyone's human though and many do over indulge, obviously.
Submitted by loki (user info) at 2005-08-02 12:17:44 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
nicely done
definitely keep going
One question though, was it not a problem for your parents to have liquor in the house? I would have thought that the JW were against all consumption of alcohol, or is it just drunkenness that they have issues with?
I would imagine that this public confession would do more to drive a young person away from the church than a more private means of atonement. That had to be a nightmare.
Submitted by Insanethemind (user info) at 2005-08-01 22:48:00 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
shandy: have already added more JW details to the first part. Within a week I will send you the first 25 -35% of the first draft for your perusal, barring any trips to the hospital, or jail. <wink>
Submitted by Insanethemind (user info) at 2005-08-01 22:10:42 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
Thanks shandy, exactly what I thought: fleshing out. That I shall
Onward
Submitted by fallenangel (user info) at 2005-08-01 21:59:51 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
OK, I'll admit it. I want more.
Submitted by shandythedog (user info) at 2005-08-01 21:31:40 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
when i say 'well worth reading' i mean as a published book or article, not in the uber sense.
Submitted by shandythedog (user info) at 2005-08-01 21:28:35 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
very good start
a future draft could benefit from some more fleshing out i think, though that will depend on what follows.
i found myself curious about jehovah life and wanted to know more about what it was like.
forge ahead my man, forge ahead - the ingredients (jehovas, drugs, mental problems, crime, the florida setting and of coure that exceptionally charismatic main character) are all there for something well worth reading.
Submitted by bob (user info) at 2005-08-01 19:39:22 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
OMFG!!!!!!!!
solid writing.
Submitted by forensicgirl3 (user info) at 2005-08-01 19:20:50 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
BTW, it deals with the last 2 paragraphs.
Submitted by forensicgirl3 (user info) at 2005-08-01 19:18:18 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Oh my gosh, I must have your e-mail! Please! I've got to tell you something!
Mine is forensicgirl3.at.yahoo.com