I think they are planning something... (844 hits)
Category: NewsRating: 1.09 on 35 reviews (Rate this item) (V)
Submitted by jimthefiend <jimthefiend.at.jim-the-fiend.com> (View user info) at 2005-08-06 04:58:09 EDT
Tuesday, August 2nd.
They have set up a base in the mint growing along the side of the house. There must be literally HUNDREDS of them. They've placed a sentry on top of the porch light. I'm pretty sure he's keeping a log of who enters and leaves. He may even have a camera.
Wensday, August 3rd.
They are now starting to infiltrate the plants growing on the sunporch. This is starting to make me nervous. How in the hell did they GET IN? Only one door now separates us. I'm pretty sure they are bulding a device of some sort in the garage... I hear noises at night.
Thursday, August 4th.
The cat has disappeared. There is a large silk wrapped object hanging in a tree out back. I'm afraid to investigate. I haven't seen a bird in the yard for days.
Friday, August 5th.
I have barricaded all of the exterior doors with towels. Not sure it will stop them.
Saturday, August 6th.
They're in the house. One hangs on the ceiling above my desk right now... Just watching me. Plotting. It will happen soon, I can feel it. There is a tense aura of expectation in the air. I hope it will be quick.
User Reviews
Submitted by fluff (user info) at 2005-08-13 13:45:30 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
No Comment
Submitted by TheGirlWithoutATitle (user info) at 2005-08-07 09:27:11 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
HippoRapist, go rape a hippo.
Submitted by HippoRapist (user info) at 2005-08-06 19:54:09 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
No Comment
Submitted by forensicgirl3 (user info) at 2005-08-06 18:29:44 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
He'll do it too.
Submitted by jimthefiend (user info) at 2005-08-06 17:20:21 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Really?
ok
Submitted by TheGirlWithoutATitle (user info) at 2005-08-06 13:44:53 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
Ick.
Post another picture of your wank.
Submitted by jimthefiend (user info) at 2005-08-06 11:07:15 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Since when do spiders have a sense of smell?
No nature merit badge for you. Dipshit.
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2005-08-06 10:58:28 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Submitted by vergery (user info) at 2005-08-06 05:37:43 (#)
Ranking: -2
Everything you ever wanted to know about jimthefiend not related to shlongy
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Buahahahahahahahahahaah....BUSTED, Psycho!
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2005-08-06 10:57:42 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Spiders usually follow the stink...and look where they're headed, dipshit.
Submitted by Method (user info) at 2005-08-06 10:37:14 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
The topic and delivery have been done to death, on this site and elsewhere, and it's not funny or original.
Don't start crying.
Submitted by fallenangel (user info) at 2005-08-06 10:29:20 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
*Shudders and plans on not sleeping for a few days*
Submitted by forensicgirl3 (user info) at 2005-08-06 10:20:29 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Uh.....eyewwwwwwww!!!!!!
I feel you dude, I've had my own battle with them. Linkwhore? Ok, since you asked http://www.ubersite.com/m/70957
A piece of advice, the second you hear one word of ebonics......get the poison!
Spiders.....<shudders>.....legs. Lots of legs.....moving.....<shudders>.
You can pull off several of the 8 and the fuckers can STILL move about.
That ain't right, man!
Submitted by zakalwe (user info) at 2005-08-06 10:16:01 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
argh. we caught a spider in the living room the other day, and it was so big we had to trap it in a vase. but this puts that to shame.
Submitted by bob (user info) at 2005-08-06 10:07:22 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
HOLY MOTHERFUCKING FAG ON A STICK!!!!!!!!!!!!
ahhhhhhhhhhhhh
WHAT FUCKING SPIDER IS THAT?
Submitted by MANICMOTHER (user info) at 2005-08-06 09:41:35 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
That's a great picture of the spider. It's beautiful, unlike that horrid thing Kracka put up a couple of days ago. I mean, I LIKE spiders...... but damn, that thing looked evil.
Submitted by Anansie (user info) at 2005-08-06 09:13:20 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
Aaaaah!
Submitted by Sphagnum (user info) at 2005-08-06 08:29:35 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I can't stand Spiders... And I'm an Australian.
Submitted by jimthefiend (user info) at 2005-08-06 07:29:40 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Pussy Spider or not, it still gave me the evil eye while I was taking that pic.
heh
Anyway, I killed 4 Brown Recluse spiders in my basement a while back. I think those are about the most dangerous we have here in the midwest.
Submitted by thecaes (user info) at 2005-08-06 07:28:28 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
GAH! Giant spiders!
"Spider poison is people poison??"
Submitted by Danger_Ranger (user info) at 2005-08-06 06:55:28 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
The area I live in has the highest population of redback spiders on the planet. The other day I was pulling down the garage door and one fell and landed right at my feet.
He looked at me and said, "Hello fuckface, I bet you wish I was your everyday plain vanilla garden spider."
"Yes, yes I do." I replied, then stepped on him with my heavy soled boot and turned him into something that resembled a pap smear.
Submitted by Kre8rix (user info) at 2005-08-06 06:32:31 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I'm pretty sure thats an orb spider.
There was one that hung out at the monkey cage at the zoo in Austin.
I don't think that's relative in any way.
Submitted by williamson (user info) at 2005-08-06 06:28:11 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I'm a mild arachnaphobe myself.
Submitted by seanfogy (user info) at 2005-08-06 06:20:48 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by Clawsss (user info) at 2005-08-06 06:05:04 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Funny as hell!
I think those spiders are actually quite beautiful. We don't have a garden anymore, so i never see them out here in the country anymore.
Submitted by Electro (user info) at 2005-08-06 05:55:32 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Always have those in your gardens... they help keep some bad shit out...
Submitted by a_little_more_time (user info) at 2005-08-06 05:43:47 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by vergery (user info) at 2005-08-06 05:37:43 (#)
Ranking: -2
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Alter Alert!
Submitted by jimthefiend (user info) at 2005-08-06 05:40:05 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Now you're just being silly. Eat a dick niglet.
Submitted by vergery (user info) at 2005-08-06 05:37:43 EDT (#)
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Submitted by GaidinCanuck (user info) at 2005-08-06 05:25:41 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Got a chuckle outta me.
Submitted by Ducky (user info) at 2005-08-06 05:19:10 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by jimthefiend (user info) at 2005-08-06 05:02:36 EDT (#)
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Everything you ever wanted to know about vergery
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Why don't you shut the fuck up?
Submitted by jimthefiend (user info) at 2005-08-06 05:01:31 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
The little fuckers are EVERYWHERE. God damn garden spiders.
Submitted by vergery (user info) at 2005-08-06 05:01:26 EDT (#)
Ranking: -1
Put that thing on the end of your cock and you've yourself a 4" ruler.
Submitted by rad1101 (user info) at 2005-08-06 05:00:48 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
*PUKES*
Submitted by a_little_more_time (user info) at 2005-08-06 04:59:30 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Hudson: "Jesus! Kill it!"
Apone: "Flamethrower! MOVE!"