Sorry Habeeb - I, Michael Jackson, have bought the Chicago Bears... (935 hits)
Category: SportsRating: 1.39 on 34 reviews (Rate this item) (V)
Submitted by Michael Jackson (View user info) at 2005-08-08 12:40:36 EDT
...they were cheap too, cheaper than when I settled out of court in 1994.
I have fired all the players and replaced them all with Oompa Loompas and Dennis Rodman. Also, I bought them all nice new shiny lilac uniforms - Shamone!
Love,
Michael
Bellow is the proof of purchase, because as usual, people will say that I, Michael Jackson, am lying, molesting them, or something:
User Reviews
Submitted by Berty (user info) at 2006-04-21 20:05:21 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by CaptainThorns (user info) at 2005-08-09 08:16:31 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
This was going to get a 0 for lack of effort until I read THIS in the reviews:
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Oh joy!
For you see!
Rad has died of AIDS!
Platypus' can not get AIDS!
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HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
Submitted by Phate (user info) at 2005-08-09 01:42:28 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
No Comment
Submitted by knucklesnelson (user info) at 2005-08-08 21:46:06 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
You paid too much
Submitted by joedaddy (user info) at 2005-08-08 16:55:22 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
No Comment
Submitted by sg11588 (user info) at 2005-08-08 16:44:06 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
YES!!!! YES GOD!!!
MICHAEL YOU ARE MY HERO, I LOVE YOU!
Submitted by MichaelJackson (user info) at 2005-08-08 15:51:00 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by sg11588 (user info) at 2005-08-08 13:31:31 (#)
Ranking: 2
You're right Michael, I'm sorry. I shouldn't have been so ignorant.
You're the greatest Michael. Can you write a song about a platypus?
---------------------------
<sings>
Oh under the water
That's where the platypus swims
He is free
Free
Free (ah yee hee)
Under the water,
No one will sue him,
Oh now (shamone!)
Not he,
No one will sue the platypus
<chorus>
Be free!
Free like the platypus
Lay your eggs where you want
Be free!
I was I was free
Free like the platypus
</chorus>
But here comes Rad
And he is bad
He has a rabbit (ha ha rabbit shamone!)
And the rabbit is bad
They break the platypus' eggs
And Rad even gets the platypus
In a head lock
<weeps>
<does slow moonwalk>
<chorus>
Be free!
Free like the platypus
Lay your eggs where you want
Be free!
I was I was free
Free like the platypus
</chorus>
Oh joy!
For you see!
Rad has died of AIDS!
Platypus' can not get AIDS!
They
Are
Free!
I
Wish
I
Was
Freeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee
<grabs crotch>
</sings>
Submitted by ChristPuncher (user info) at 2005-08-08 14:43:09 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
GOD DAMN MICHEAL JACSKON
IMO KEEL U
78 BUCKS????
RAAAAA
Submitted by jimthefiend (user info) at 2005-08-08 13:57:44 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
linkwhore http://www.ubersite.com/m/72659
you looked better as a plain old nigger dude rather than as a white woman.
Submitted by Professional_Peon (user info) at 2005-08-08 13:34:28 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by MichaelJackson (user info) at 2005-08-08 13:08:08 (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by sg11588 (user info) at 2005-08-08 13:05:58 (#)
Ranking: 2
Whatever you say Method.
And by the way, they were very nice pictures.
------------------------------------
No... that bath tub was full of floating doodie
-------------------------
Thanks, I needed that while eating lunch.
Go VISUALS WOOO!
Submitted by sg11588 (user info) at 2005-08-08 13:31:31 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
You're right Michael, I'm sorry. I shouldn't have been so ignorant.
You're the greatest Michael. Can you write a song about a platypus?
Submitted by MichaelJackson (user info) at 2005-08-08 13:18:06 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
<sings>
Diana walked up to me,
She said I'm all yours tonight
At that I ran to the phone
Sayin' baby I'm alright
I said but unlock the door.
Because I forgot the key.
She said he's not coming back
Because he's slepping with me
Dirty Diana, nah
Dirty Diana, nah
Dirty Diana, nah
Dirty Diana, no
</sings>
Submitted by spedmonkey (user info) at 2005-08-08 13:16:13 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Let me guess: the new cheerleaders will be five-year-old boys in tighty-whities.
Submitted by MichaelJackson (user info) at 2005-08-08 13:08:08 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by sg11588 (user info) at 2005-08-08 13:05:58 (#)
Ranking: 2
Whatever you say Method.
And by the way, they were very nice pictures.
------------------------------------
No... that bath tub was full of floating doodie
Submitted by sg11588 (user info) at 2005-08-08 13:05:58 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Whatever you say Method.
And by the way, they were very nice pictures.
Submitted by MichaelJackson (user info) at 2005-08-08 13:03:12 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by sg11588 (user info) at 2005-08-08 12:50:25 (#)
Ranking: 2
I have finally figured it out.
MJ = METHOD.
No doubt about it.
-----------------------------
Don't be silly, coming here with your alter shenanigans...
You're still mad, because I blocked you on AIM after you sent me those photos of you in the bath, aren't you?
Submitted by Jeanneee (user info) at 2005-08-08 13:00:08 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Take the Falcons off our hands and we'll throw in the Thrashers for free.
Submitted by Phate (user info) at 2005-08-08 12:59:46 EDT (#)
Ranking: -1
not very amusing
Submitted by MichaelJackson (user info) at 2005-08-08 12:56:01 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by JonnyX (user info) at 2005-08-08 12:54:10 (#)
Ranking: 2
You should move the team to Gary, Indiana.
---------------------------------------
No ways! My home town sucks! It is full of rednecks and emo kids :(
Submitted by MichaelJackson (user info) at 2005-08-08 12:55:00 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by munkeypants (user info) at 2005-08-08 12:49:25 (#)
Ranking: 2
HAHAHAHAHA
Dearest Michael,
If you are my true friend you will change their colors to pink, aquamarine, and purple.
Those are Habeeb's favorite colors.
Love,
Munkey
-------------------------------
Dearest Miss Munkeypants,
Where is that racist joke you were going to send me? You know the one about the Eskimos?
Love,
Michael
Submitted by JonnyX (user info) at 2005-08-08 12:54:10 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
You should move the team to Gary, Indiana.
Submitted by proofofpurchase (user info) at 2005-08-08 12:53:55 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
...only because you mentioned my name.
Submitted by MichaelJackson (user info) at 2005-08-08 12:51:58 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by FATMANTPK (user info) at 2005-08-08 12:48:30 (#)
Ranking: 2
Another poor financial investment by MJ.
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What are you talking about? The Chicago Bears are the best basketball team ever... well except for our Californian teams... Shamone!
Submitted by Arthur_Dent (user info) at 2005-08-08 12:51:47 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Thorpe did you get the book yet?
Submitted by sg11588 (user info) at 2005-08-08 12:50:25 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I have finally figured it out.
MJ = METHOD.
No doubt about it.
Submitted by munkeypants (user info) at 2005-08-08 12:49:25 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
HAHAHAHAHA
Dearest Michael,
If you are my true friend you will change their colors to pink, aquamarine, and purple.
Those are Habeeb's favorite colors.
Love,
Munkey
Submitted by FATMANTPK (user info) at 2005-08-08 12:48:30 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Another poor financial investment by MJ.
Submitted by MichaelJackson (user info) at 2005-08-08 12:47:35 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by BLITZKREIG_BOB (user info) at 2005-08-08 12:43:57 (#)
Ranking: 2
HAHA.
Their coach's name is Lovey.
Wasn't she married to Mr. Howell?
------------------------------
http://www.chicagobears.com/uploads/photos/perm/main/GJDGMJJHFLEK/Smith_Lovie_CHI_2005.jpg
I dunno, but he could kick your ass... not mine, but then again I, Michael Jackson, am famous and stuff, so no one would want to. Shamone!
Submitted by Xcuses (user info) at 2005-08-08 12:44:22 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
$78.23 for the Bears..............
You got ripped off
Submitted by Berty (user info) at 2005-08-08 12:44:12 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Har Har
Submitted by BLITZKREIG_BOB (user info) at 2005-08-08 12:43:57 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
HAHA.
Their coach's name is Lovey.
Wasn't she married to Mr. Howell?
Submitted by jgreening (user info) at 2005-08-08 12:43:56 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Teh Chicago Shamones
Good name.
Submitted by w_t_a_y_s_t_r_m (user info) at 2005-08-08 12:43:55 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I have a massive faith issue, but you're helping
Submitted by sg11588 (user info) at 2005-08-08 12:43:49 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
MJ IS METHOD! MJ IS METHOD!!
AHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!