Uber Softball Team! (SFW for a change) (1098 hits)
Category: NoneRating: 0.31 on 45 reviews (Rate this item) (V)
Submitted by Vulva (View user info) at 2005-08-15 21:59:00 EDT
This is for a co-ed team and we will be eligible for the national championship!
I am your coach!
Act like T.O. and I will bench/Own your monkey nigger ass! <----Kracka, this slur does not apply to you homey!
Tell me WHERE I should put you in the field, and in the LINE-UP and WHY...
Uber softball tem..is da roxors! (2 kB) [image/x-jg]
User Reviews
Submitted by kuroneko_sama (user info) at 2006-10-22 04:22:30 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
might i add im 26 and healthier than most 16 year olds (plus a birth defect that gives me a permanent 25% adreniline rush)
Submitted by kuroneko_sama (user info) at 2006-10-22 04:17:26 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
put me as catcher or 3rd base, im good at the "shoulder check/clothesline" tag out for those base stealing bitches.
i could pitch too, did in highschool. batters hate left handed pitchers.
also the left handed thing works both ways, i piss right handed pitchers off just as easily... as a left hander i can take advantage of no short stop between first and second..... always good for a grounder double or triple
Submitted by AsshOly (user info) at 2006-10-22 03:50:02 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I play left field. I'm fast, I can catch, and I have a strong arm for nailing any bitches who try tagging up at third.
Also I bat second. Just get somebody on base when I come up and I will move him to third. I am not strong enough to hit third. I'm a line drive guy. Doubles and triples. I have hit two home runs in three years.
And I expect a salary of no less than 13 million over the next 4 years with a player option on the fourth year.
Submitted by polyamorousaj (user info) at 2005-08-16 20:41:45 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
HAHAHAHAHA
Nitty cracks me the fuck up.
As far as my strike zone, no issue. My arms are long enough to put the bat on the ball even if it's out of the strike zone. Just don't pitch me inside because I'll lean into it, charge the mound, and make you bite the pitching rubber as I curb-stomp you.
Submitted by Vulva (user info) at 2005-08-16 14:12:16 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I think the Tiger/Jeeeeneeneneaneeeeee cheerleader combo would work nicely. I guess we're fucked for a mound jockey! We could let one of the fatter guys pitch.
I will play wherever there is a lot of ground to cover. I can hold my own anywhere except the mound!
Any fat guys up for pitchin?
Submitted by nitty34 (user info) at 2005-08-16 11:20:57 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
jgreen - who did you walk?
Submitted by jgreening (user info) at 2005-08-16 11:13:47 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
3rd base.
Why?
I play 3rd in my beer league.
Ever see an intentional walk in softball?
I have.
That's how good I am.
Submitted by SiskelandFatboy (user info) at 2005-08-16 11:05:18 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
Put me next to the keg, or at least as close as possible to it.
I bat left, throw left but I am old and out of shape, I would prolly need a desiganted runner to stand behind me and run the bases when I hit the ball.
Submitted by nitty34 (user info) at 2005-08-16 11:03:12 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
AJ I think your strike zone would be too big
Submitted by polyamorousaj (user info) at 2005-08-16 10:50:05 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
I kicked some softball ass in Michigan.
Assh0ly is pretty good, too.
Submitted by Vulva (user info) at 2005-08-16 10:42:08 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by BobLobla (user info) at 2005-08-16 09:48:27 (#)
Ranking: 0
WTF, you promised
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Hold your horses! Itsa comin eh!
Submitted by BuckeyesTHEGAME (user info) at 2005-08-16 10:23:14 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
I'd say put me in at left center and about 6th or 7th in the lineup.
Submitted by BobLobla (user info) at 2005-08-16 09:48:27 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
WTF, you promised
http://www.ubersite.com/m/73228#1526106
Submitted by Vulva (user info) at 2005-08-16 09:24:49 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
GHEY!
I have been hacked! Someone changed the password on my Yahoo account! Uh oh! If it was someone from Uber you suck teh balls. Great, now my info is public!
Submitted by Vulva (user info) at 2005-08-16 08:56:29 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
How about 2 drunk posts in one night!
Go Vulv!
Submitted by Vulva (user info) at 2005-08-16 08:55:56 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by badassmofo (user info) at 2005-08-16 00:22:56 (#)
Ranking: 0
God Damn Steelers beatin the Eagles... I hate preseason.
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Superbowl bound baby! 14-0 lead and the offense never stepped onto the field!
Submitted by nitty34 (user info) at 2005-08-16 08:16:09 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
Fuck, you asked us to tell you why...
I played short through high school, college, and in the MABL/MSBL for the last 5 years. I can also handle 3rd if need be. As for the batting order, I'm not gonna leg out many infield hits, so I prefer to hit the ball a really, really long way. Then I get to jog.
I want TigerLilly and Jeanneee in charge of the cheerleading.
Topless, of course.
Submitted by Beer_bong (user info) at 2005-08-16 07:53:06 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
I should probably bat 6th. Not much of a power hitter, more of a smack it down the line hitter. Last 2 years of high school and first year of college my averages were .388, .415, and .353 respectively.
Oh, and I'm slow and have a bad knee.
Submitted by nitty34 (user info) at 2005-08-16 07:44:36 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Put me at shortstop and bat me 4th.
Shlongy - if you're the owner we need to talk about my contract.
Submitted by MisterDevious (user info) at 2005-08-16 07:16:15 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
I'll play my usual place: Left Out.
MrDVS
Submitted by Fabit (user info) at 2005-08-16 06:38:21 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I should play left midfield. I wish i knew some positions in softball. erm, umpire?
Submitted by HadToBeDone (user info) at 2005-08-16 01:35:28 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
I suppose it would be possible for me to be the batboy.
Submitted by BuckeyesTHEGAME (user info) at 2005-08-16 00:45:16 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
I started for my squadron's team three years in a row. First year at 2nd, the other two at center and left. We won the base championship twice and qualified to play in a tournament in Panama City. Alas, we had to forfeit our spot in the tourney because seven players had a detachment to make.
I used to be really good, not to be arrogant. I played ball from the time I was 5 until I was a senior in HS. I've never been much of a hitter, but I had good speed and a fantastic glove.
HAD is the key word. That was about 30 pounds ago... I can still play, but my range is smaller.
Submitted by UrbaneMischief (user info) at 2005-08-16 00:33:39 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
i call center field
Submitted by badassmofo (user info) at 2005-08-16 00:22:56 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
God Damn Steelers beatin the Eagles... I hate preseason.
Submitted by Vulva (user info) at 2005-08-15 23:55:32 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Hey dick heads!
Fuck the pic! DO YOU PLAY SOFTBALL?
Submitted by munkeypants (user info) at 2005-08-15 23:20:52 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
second base. I have played that position in a fiercly competitive league for
5 years.
I am an okay batter. I am a right hander who tends to hit to right field.
I SHOULD BE ON THIS TEAM!
Submitted by Chinaski (user info) at 2005-08-15 23:16:40 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
No Comment
Submitted by CaptainThorns (user info) at 2005-08-15 22:54:48 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Shortstop, because that's where I've played for the past 15 years of my 28 year life.
Submitted by electrictoothsyndrome (user info) at 2005-08-15 22:30:20 EDT (#)
Ranking: -1
I was going to say just to dowload and rename the file, but that didn't work either.
-1 because I'd like to see the pic if you fix it.
Submitted by Crystle (user info) at 2005-08-15 22:26:41 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
Umm... I throw like a girl, can't really bat.. I can occasionally catch.. can I be a benchwarmer to play with the balls that aren't being used on the field?
Submitted by joedaddy (user info) at 2005-08-15 22:21:30 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
any questions, zak?
Submitted by badassmofo (user info) at 2005-08-15 22:16:47 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
NO I was being serious, I won't conitnue to fuck your shit but, you should repost...it doesn't work.
Submitted by Vulva (user info) at 2005-08-15 22:15:49 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
I meant Brian Cashfagerman!
Submitted by Vulva (user info) at 2005-08-15 22:15:27 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2005-08-15 22:05:12 (#)
Ranking: -2
I'm the owner/GM.
You're fired for posting this piece of pure, unadulterated horseshit.
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Bad attitude as the GM...George Steinbrenner ass motherfagger!
Submitted by Vulva (user info) at 2005-08-15 22:13:43 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by badassmofo (user info) at 2005-08-15 22:02:35 (#)
Ranking: -2
Repost shitbird!
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Never....Jay rhymes with gay!
Just an observation! LOL
That is the first -2 i ever got from you. Must be a bad night homeboy!
Submitted by Vulva (user info) at 2005-08-15 22:11:58 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Claim ur spot, then argue about the validity of your position!
Submitted by Vulva (user info) at 2005-08-15 22:10:55 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Dont be gay about the pic!
Submitted by Unabonger (user info) at 2005-08-15 22:07:53 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
short stop, baby...
Submitted by Vulva (user info) at 2005-08-15 22:07:31 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
OK I fucked up the pic! Shoot me!
The theme still applies.... where should you play, and why? I need resumes' and stats! I want only the best of the best on MY team.
If you are a COLORED, you get first consideration! Only cause you got that extra bone in you hip that makes you dance/run/hit/swing/fuck better! Other than that, all othrs need apply....behind the coloreds of course!!!
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2005-08-15 22:05:12 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
I'm the owner/GM.
You're fired for posting this piece of pure, unadulterated horseshit.
Submitted by joedaddy (user info) at 2005-08-15 22:04:32 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
you're over stimulated
no more sugar for u today
Submitted by Beer_bong (user info) at 2005-08-15 22:04:22 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
I call first base!!!!!
Submitted by badassmofo (user info) at 2005-08-15 22:02:35 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Repost shitbird!
Submitted by zakalwe (user info) at 2005-08-15 21:59:49 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
your attachment is fucked.
off.