My new attitude ... (739 hits)
Category: GeneralRating: 1.07 on 25 reviews (Rate this item) (V)
Submitted by jet_stream_nz (View user info) at 2005-08-21 12:54:24 EDT
All of you that work in an office environment may have similar worries and most want to write the other email (you will understand) ...
I work for a call centre, it's a 24/7 operation ... I work nights and imagine that the only reason I would be here during the day would be to introduce the day staff to my new AK-47.
Working nights means that most of the company information that I receive comes from EMAILS ... you get the usual this is what the company means to achieve in the next quarter, ones about who the new sales manager is (like I will even see his fat ass in here at 3am) and then there are the emails from our so called managers.
I don't know if it's every employee in the world that thinks this?
But I can't help thinking that they leave the biggest bunch of fuck-jobs in charge of this companies day-to-day affairs. Mind you I guess they leave me in charge so maybe all day supervisors think the same thing about my crew and me.
When I don't think the day staff can fuck up something anymore they just go that extra step and double fuck up stuff. Now I can understand that people make mistakes and that's part of life, so you get over what ever the fuck up is ... you arrive at work the next night and there it is an email from one of the day supervisors and its apparent that the day crew fuck up because they are managed by a fuck-wit.
So you open the email, you start to read it and you realize that if this day supervisor has nuts that they are really small and that his main reason for living is to get the bosses nuts in his mouth. So you start a reply, of course emails are the worst thing when you really want to write, "Why don't you man up" but have to write something along the lines of "Well I think the issue is ..."
The following email is from one of the day supervisors ... he sent it to anyone that would listen (of course details have been changed as I don't need company info getting about as they might fire me - However in the past you have needed to get a client killed to be fired). The spelling and the grammar are all his, I cant say that I am great with that stuff but fuck at least run the spell check before sending it to the boss.
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Hello Mr. Bean,
This morning our rep's were fielding abuse from irate clients at being called at 0800 on a Sunday Morning. They were not only unhappy at such an early call for a Sunday, but at they annoying neighbours by testing devices at this early hour on their day of rest!
I feel we can be more considerate this for this one day of the week.
Perhaps we should revise our staggered hours and delay event to 0900/0930/1000/1030/1100/1130 perhaps, just for Sundays.
Also, we seem to be getting a much higher proportions at 0800 than other times (this morning=66), and feel we should reinforced across all teams the need to stagger these times, for the benefit of GOS, and clients alike (too many in one hit and we can't get to the crucial-commercial- events) in a good responsive time.
Mr. Potatoe Head
Team Manager
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Of course I would love to reply in the fashion that you can reply to things here in Uber, but I would have been fired years ok. So I wrote my reply.
Things that need to be taken in to account are, that I actually like my job, they pay me ok, the hours suit and I work with some really good people. However for every 5 good people we have there is one idiot left in charge of them.
(Everything in brackets is what should be acceptable to send as a reply)
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Morning Mr Potatoe Head,
I can understand that making clients irate is not good for business, however I would like the details of the clients involved so that I can follow up with them to allow us to streamline the process for them.
(You woke up one person, that person was probably ok with what was happening until your operator couldn't explain what they were calling about, and then the operator probably badmouthed the client's mother and you more than likely refused to talk to the client. I still suspect that the actual client is make believe. Also you think they yell about this shit at 8am, you should hear the yelling at 3am when I have to explain that I don't know why the day staff would have done this (fucked up that is) and that I will have to follow up with there manager)
Also I will speak to my team to make sure that the events we leave for follow up are not all scheduled to be dealt with at the same time. I can understand how your Grade of Service would be effected when those events weren't dealt with in a timely fashion.
(You bitch whinge about the amount of shit you needed to follow up, 66 showed up for you at 6am, however somehow I had fucking 186 to deal with when I arrived for work at 10pm. So you raised me 120 and then want them to be more staggered, you cant get to them when they show up early, fucked if you would if I give you more time. So fuck that you will have those 186 to deal with in the morning and whatever else I can't be fucked dealing with overnight)
I hope that we can find a suitable balance to stop these lower priority events impeding you from dealing with crucial commercial events. We will be able to address these issues at the next team manager meeting that I will be at next Thursday.
(I doubt that you understand the importance of anything that we fucking deal with here anyway, if you spent more time getting your staff to work instead of betting on the horse races and avoiding talking to our clients then they would fucking get through this shit and then some. You complain, however I think you have 2 words mixed up, you and your team weren't busy, you and your team are lazy. So now I will need to attend the team manager meeting at 2pm on Thursday which when you work nights is like 2am. I will be there, you will complain, then as soon as I start advising the boss of the actual issues your nuts will retract inside you and you will say its all fine. I will leave to go home to sleep after the meeting and you will spoon with the boss you fucking homo)
Well I will see you all on Thursday; hopefully it will be a productive meeting.
(Will see you fuck jobs on Thursday, none of you will have cocks by then so the meeting will be a big waste of my time, however I think that its time that I tried an adjustment to my attitude.)
Mr Bean
Night Team Manager
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I am fucking sick of this shit; until I am prepared to have cock stuck up my arse everything is going to be my fault or that of my team. I can't wait to get here on Thursday so that I can see the looks on these idiots faces. Who would have thought that the ammo would have arrived the day after I ordered it?
User Reviews
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2005-08-24 12:04:03 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Brand new Shlongy!
Submitted by jet_stream_nz (user info) at 2005-08-24 11:56:34 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Wish you hadnt used that statement for the reply ...
Thanks
Submitted by munkeypants (user info) at 2005-08-23 21:50:14 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by jet_stream_nz (user info) at 2005-08-21 14:48:54 (#)
Ranking: 0
Help me along here ... ok course when you write something it seems to read fine too yourself ...
-------------------------------
I am really not much of a critic. My writing is subpar and I depend on people
who know my sense of humor to be able to apply it to my posts.
It takes practice. It really does. Very few people can write gold material on their
first few tries. I see that you have great potential and have things you would like to share.
I'll definitely look for more of your posts.
Submitted by jet_stream_nz (user info) at 2005-08-23 09:23:08 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by JonnyX (user info) at 2005-08-22 15:44:26 (#)
Ranking: -1
are you still fucking here? Although, it is amusing that you call sheep-fucking 'testing', I suppose it is, in your manner of speaking - therefore only a -1 is warranted.
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Yeah I am still here and I seem to be important enough for you to be checking my posts ...
And I have even moved up in the world ... thanks for the -1.
Like I give a fuck ...
Submitted by JonnyX (user info) at 2005-08-22 15:44:26 EDT (#)
Ranking: -1
are you still fucking here? Although, it is amusing that you call sheep-fucking 'testing', I suppose it is, in your manner of speaking - therefore only a -1 is warranted.
Submitted by jet_stream_nz (user info) at 2005-08-22 13:54:55 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Does this mean that I have to -2 your posts - fuck that sounds like work
Submitted by WhatTheHell (user info) at 2005-08-22 13:24:58 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
CUNT FUCK BALL GAG DOUCHENOZZLE CUM SWALLOWER!!
Please tell Mom I said hi!
Submitted by Sphagnum (user info) at 2005-08-22 09:35:57 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I'm excited about the opportunity of being able to experience this "new attitude" first hand.
Stupid Communist.
Submitted by mbstateside (user info) at 2005-08-21 20:27:47 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
Yeah, I'd agree with what most of the rest of the people here have to say.
Good basis for a rant post but you didn't quite nail it for the +2.
Decent enough though man
Submitted by Xcuses (user info) at 2005-08-21 18:52:18 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
This had so much potential but just fell short a little in the delivery. As mentioned, Chronic said what I felt as well
Submitted by Stin (user info) at 2005-08-21 17:38:04 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
Nice. You have good thoughts, and a lot of potential.
Listen to Chronic. He's good.
Submitted by Sphagnum (user info) at 2005-08-21 17:03:11 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I have a real appreciation for this post. It made me laugh alot.
Here is another one of those idiots. http://www.ubersite.com/m/61115
Submitted by jet_stream_nz (user info) at 2005-08-21 15:41:03 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
http://www.ubersite.com/m/73606 ... Smoking pot improves Fast Food so that its scores double digits...
Working on my link whore ...
Submitted by jet_stream_nz (user info) at 2005-08-21 15:33:30 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Thanks for that - I should have also asked that advise would only be taken if I get a +2, but now that would have been full on rude ... lol
Submitted by Chroniclysm (user info) at 2005-08-21 15:29:47 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
Good story. Good concept.
The writing is close. It only needs to be tweaked and there is nothing so glaring that it won't come in time. It isn't hard to follow. It just doesn't have ideal flow.
Proofreading aloud always helps me with this because I can hear when I have weird clauses in the middle of sentences and when a word really doesn't say what I want others to hear.
The other thing, arguably the most important, is to write stuff, save it, and go back to it a few days later. When you first write something and then you re-read, it is so fresh in your memory that you know exactly what you were trying to say and it seems clearer than it often is. I've gotten away from this somewhat but I have no doubt that the best stuff I write isn't the stuff I write, revise, and post in one day. The best stuff is written and forgotten about in the depths of my hard drive for a few days before I go back and tweak shit around.
Submitted by jet_stream_nz (user info) at 2005-08-21 14:53:15 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Ok that makes no sence ... How do I make this stuff more readable ...
Submitted by jet_stream_nz (user info) at 2005-08-21 14:48:54 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by munkeypants (user info) at 2005-08-21 14:39:54 (#)
Ranking: 2
difficult to read
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Help me along here ... ok course when you write something it seems to read fine too yourself ...
Submitted by munkeypants (user info) at 2005-08-21 14:39:54 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
difficult to read but I work in an office so I feel your pain.
Submitted by Jeanneee (user info) at 2005-08-21 13:57:48 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I work in a call center too. I feel your pain.
Submitted by jet_stream_nz (user info) at 2005-08-21 13:45:12 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by ChannelDunlap (user info) at 2005-08-21 13:33:53 (#)
Ranking: 0
he works for a "call centre" according to the beginning of the post, so they're probably calling people (testing a dialer? I can't figure out what'd you'd have to test..) at 8am.
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You wouldnt understand, however that means you can come and be management.
See you Thursday ...
Submitted by MANICMOTHER (user info) at 2005-08-21 13:37:40 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by dirtycyberdawg (user info) at 2005-08-21 13:27:16 (#)
Ranking: 2
Nice company
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You would know, wouldn't you.
Submitted by ChannelDunlap (user info) at 2005-08-21 13:33:53 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
he works for a "call centre" according to the beginning of the post, so they're probably calling people (testing a dialer? I can't figure out what'd you'd have to test..) at 8am.
Submitted by jet_stream_nz (user info) at 2005-08-21 13:28:48 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
What we are testing is secret ... I can tell you ... only if
You work for us ... or I kill you ...
And after reading this I guess there is only one option ... lol
Submitted by dirtycyberdawg (user info) at 2005-08-21 13:27:16 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Nice company
You should learn how to spoon, so you too can be in the little "Circle of Trust"
That management seem to have there
Submitted by c1ndy (user info) at 2005-08-21 13:20:12 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
nothing should be tested at 8am on sunday except breakfast!
(what on earth are you testing?)