Thursday Shitpile: The 1,000,000th New Orleans Post (711 hits)
Category: Quotes & StoriesRating: 1.08 on 26 reviews (Rate this item) (V)
Submitted by Willard the Clown (View user info) at 2005-09-01 21:57:00 EDT
Last night, I was on my way to work, and as usual I stop at whatever fast food place is open at 11:30 PM to get my dinner. This particular evening, I chose the fine dining that is McDonalds.
Yeah, I'm a fatass...hope you drown in trucker diarrhea.
Since I'm broke this week, I had to order off of the dollar menu. So two chicken sandwiches and a small drink later, I'm all set to drive off when the lady asked me an additional question:
"Would you like to make a donation to the New Orleans relief effort?"
Now, I hate being asked by a large company to donate money. It annoys me. McDonalds makes billions of dollars a year, if they really want to help the effort, they can afford the donation. I can't. So I told her: "No ma'am, I'm in need of a donation myself this week."
She just shook her head and said: "You ought to be ashamed of yourself."
I'm a pretty even-tempered person. I used to work customer service, so even if I get treated horribly, I normally do not say anything. But this comment made me lose my cool faster than a college freshman losing her virginity.
So, I'll tell all of you, what I told her...I DON'T GIVE A FUCK ABOUT NEW ORLEANS.
There...I said it.
Not an iota of sympathy. Don't care. Call me selfish. Call me narcissistic. I don't care.
These people live in a bowl surrounded by water with nothing but a huge dirt wall to protect them from destruction. They had a huge ass amount of warning that this was coming...they should have strapped everything to the roof and got the fuck out.
What's that? The poor people couldn't afford to leave?? I think they could have scraped enough stuff together to pawn for a bus ticket the hell out of there when the alternative was death and destruction. I know I would have.
Sorry I don't feel sorry for them when I have bills that I cannot pay. I don't see a foundation to help me when I can't pay my bills, or when my car breaks down, or when I have to give my left nut for a gallon of gas. I say fuck them. If they aren't smart enough to buy flood insurance...too bad, you're homeless. If they were not smart enough to leave when they could...sucks to be you.
I just don't care.
User Reviews
Submitted by Barnymeinhoff (user info) at 2005-09-02 04:40:26 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
sould have lamped the cunt.
the people in md over here are not allowed to fucking talk or look customers in the eye.
Submitted by rad1101 (user info) at 2005-09-02 02:18:03 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by joedaddy (user info) at 2005-09-02 01:24:40 (#)
Ranking: 0
Shouldn't you be at work checking the pee holes of 14yr olds for contraband at the shopping mall?
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MOTHERFUCKER I USED TO DO THAT WHEN I WAS IN COLLEGE.
*ahem*
*dies*
Submitted by d_prime (user info) at 2005-09-02 02:06:44 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
+2 image
Submitted by joedaddy (user info) at 2005-09-02 01:24:40 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Shouldn't you be at work checking the pee holes of 14yr olds for contraband at the shopping mall?
Submitted by Rawrg (user info) at 2005-09-02 01:20:43 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by Caulaincourt (user info) at 2005-09-02 00:10:53 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
http://www.ubersite.com/m/74413
Submitted by stardamage (user info) at 2005-09-02 00:02:14 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
*cries emo tears*
Submitted by Feijuada (user info) at 2005-09-01 23:57:07 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
"And we all know how easy it is for old people in wheelchairs and sick people in hospital beds to get out of town, and children."
What the fuck are you talking about? Don't children have parents? New orleans isn't Calccutta, you know. People in hospitals... can fuck off.
"I think they're the only people in the city itself who deserve real sympathy, though. Even if you don't own a thing but the clothes on your back, if you're mobile and healthy and you had four days' warning, you could be SOMEWHERE other than the city itself. Even walking. Hitching a ride or something. I'm sure there are a few people out there who are not heartless enough to refuse a ride to people fleeing for their lives."
they didn't have four day's warning, they had at least a week to haul ass out of the city. No person was surprised.
And yes, I would refuse a hitchhiker.
"Also: WHO THE FUCK TAKES POT SHOTS AT RESCUE HELICOPTERS?!"
People who are so awesome that you can't understand them.
"(I have a lot of pent-up rage and fear and sorrow and stuff about this, if you couldn't tell.)"
Why? Do you live in new Orleans or have close relatives there? Why should you give a fuck about retards who couldn't get out of the way of a fucking hurricane with a week's time?
If you don't: fuck you.
If you do: fuck you x2, I hope your family dies, you loser.
"Worth reading, though."
'Twas.
Submitted by stardamage (user info) at 2005-09-01 23:53:09 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
by the way. I'm not blaming the healthy, independent people (i.e. adults) who stayed or saying they're not in a bad spot, because they are.
But I just really question their line of reasoning. Surely it would be better to try to get out of harm's way as much as possible, even if it's not possible to go very far?
Surely?
I don't know, is a city better than a town to be in during a hurricane? I'm asking. I'm writing on the assumption that it doesn't really matter in the end.
Submitted by stardamage (user info) at 2005-09-01 23:35:45 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
And we all know how easy it is for old people in wheelchairs and sick people in hospital beds to get out of town, and children.
I think they're the only people in the city itself who deserve real sympathy, though. Even if you don't own a thing but the clothes on your back, if you're mobile and healthy and you had four days' warning, you could be SOMEWHERE other than the city itself. Even walking. Hitching a ride or something. I'm sure there are a few people out there who are not heartless enough to refuse a ride to people fleeing for their lives.
Also: WHO THE FUCK TAKES POT SHOTS AT RESCUE HELICOPTERS?!
(I have a lot of pent-up rage and fear and sorrow and stuff about this, if you couldn't tell.)
Worth reading, though.
Submitted by Bornloser (user info) at 2005-09-01 23:28:18 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I have not one ounce of empathy for any of them and I felt like I was the only one who was like that. I am a very sympathetic person and have no problem putting myself in other people's position.... and yet I feel nothing. I live on the largest fault on the west coast.... if some said that there was going to be 9.0 earthquake and gave me an exact time I would be sure to get the hell out of here.
Submitted by knucklesnelson (user info) at 2005-09-01 22:49:34 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Nah im sure its you, but you just got the words "sneaky little bastard" written all over you. And im not saying it as a bad thing.
Submitted by Caulaincourt (user info) at 2005-09-01 22:45:00 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
what's with my camwhores? you think that's not me?
Submitted by knucklesnelson (user info) at 2005-09-01 22:41:39 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Sounds like a good post idea to me. We can leave it up to you. I lack the talent, motivation, and besides judging from your camwhores you got scam artist written all over you.
Submitted by professorfuckface (user info) at 2005-09-01 22:40:54 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Not only was this the millionth hurricane post, it was 500,000th post saying "BOO HOO I DON'T PARTICULARLY CARE ABOUT VICTIMS AND DROWNING, LOOTING CHEESEBURGERS". SHUT THE FUCK UP, OR THINK OF A NEW ANGLE.
Submitted by Caulaincourt (user info) at 2005-09-01 22:38:30 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I doubt this will attract people en masse.
I need to make a post about this...I hope I'll finally get an overall negative rating :-)
Submitted by knucklesnelson (user info) at 2005-09-01 22:37:38 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
The only problems with scams is all the good ones have been thought of.
Submitted by MrWillard (user info) at 2005-09-01 22:36:44 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Caulaincourt (user info) at 2005-09-01 22:31:58 (#)
Ranking: 2
I just realized my idea couldn't be entirely anonymous because once the sender would get his confirmation he would see the cardholder name (my real name) in the confirmation.
mmmmm...I wonder if it's worth it.
A 100$ would outweigh the guilt, but I doubt I could muster that on a craigslist or the like.
Let's build a scam gentleman, any ideas?
======================================================
Well, first, we'd have to use someone younger than the girl in the picture. My first impression, like I said, is that she was a stripper and she could blow her way out of New Orleans.
Maybe use a kid, or a family being rescued off the roof of their house.
Then you'd have to set up an anonomoyus(sp?) PO box somewhere in the southeast. Say that you're the friend of these people, and they lost their computer in the storm, and can't get to a paypal account.
And thats it.
Submitted by Caulaincourt (user info) at 2005-09-01 22:31:58 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I just realized my idea couldn't be entirely anonymous because once the sender would get his confirmation he would see the cardholder name (my real name) in the confirmation.
mmmmm...I wonder if it's worth it.
A 100$ would outweigh the guilt, but I doubt I could muster that on a craigslist or the like.
Let's build a scam gentleman, any ideas?
Submitted by MrWillard (user info) at 2005-09-01 22:25:21 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Caulaincourt (user info) at 2005-09-01 22:05:59 (#)
Ranking: 2
I'm thinking about settting up a webpage with a paypal account to help me find my "family". I bet a few naive people would send me money.
Good idea no?
Look at this whore: http://neworleans.craigslist.org/w4m/94891908.html
=========================================================
Thats the stripper that they've dubbed the town crier, no?
No, seriously, theres a stripper with a cell phone that walks the street shouting news at everyone. Look it up.
Submitted by Caulaincourt (user info) at 2005-09-01 22:09:47 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by knucklesnelson (user info) at 2005-09-01 22:08:38 (#)
Ranking: 2
Do it caul suckers come a dime a dozen especially on the interweb
===============
I'll do it if you do it first :-)
Submitted by knucklesnelson (user info) at 2005-09-01 22:08:38 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Do it caul suckers come a dime a dozen especially on the interweb
Submitted by Caulaincourt (user info) at 2005-09-01 22:05:59 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I'm thinking about settting up a webpage with a paypal account to help me find my "family". I bet a few naive people would send me money.
Good idea no?
Look at this whore: http://neworleans.craigslist.org/w4m/94891908.html
Submitted by DonovanMD (user info) at 2005-09-01 22:00:36 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
You're the clown I ran into here arent you?
http://www.ubersite.com/m/74401
Submitted by WiKi (user info) at 2005-09-01 22:00:07 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
This made me laugh.
Am I a horrible person?
..Does anybody care?
Submitted by knucklesnelson (user info) at 2005-09-01 21:58:58 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
God bless the dollar menu.