You've Been Here Before. (849 hits)
Category: NoneLabels: Untruth
Rating: 1.79 on 23 reviews (Rate this item) (V)
Submitted by Snark << snarkk.at.gmail.com (View user info) at 2005-09-02 00:05:07 EDT
I have that awful feeling in my guts again.
It's that feeling I get deep inside like my stomach belongs to someone else and it wants to go home.
It's the feeling that tells me things in my relationship are very very wrong.
I don't know what triggers it exactly. I don't know if there are signs that my unconscious picks up or if it's just pure intuition.
Maybe they're both the same thing, I don't know.
I hate it. It doesn't stay in one spot. It moves up my back to my neck and sets it on fire.
It makes it hard to concentrate on anything else. It makes it hard to smile and harder to sleep and it's very rarely ever wrong.
There's something missing from her eyes and her touch.
There's a barely discernable hole where our easy conversation used to be and where there should be passion there are only excuses.
She's keeping me at arms length without pushing me away; Keeping me close but not letting me get close, and fucked if I wouldn't rather be in Hell than Limbo.
So I lay down, close my eyes and tell myself "Fuck it. I don't need this shit. I'm walking."
Which is easy to say, but you need to not care, to do it without a second thought.
Yeah, it's second thought time.
Do I fuck off because that feeling's back, or do I get the goods? Do I take control and move on, or do I rip into the problem?
Probably, I should do none of these things. Most likely, there's a phantom choice I'm not seeing, because that fucking feeling has it locked away in the basement of my fevered brain.
So I call to talk, I press the numbers hard and throw the phone against my head and wait to say "What's going on? What aren't you telling me?" but her recorded answer clicks on after the second ring instead of the fourth, which means she's checking the incoming number on her phone and sending me straight to voicemail.
I know, because I've seen her do it before to people she doesn't want to talk to.
Which means I'm now one of those people. I've been kicked to the other side of the fence. I don't like it here, the grass is fucking rotting, and as far as I can recall, I don't deserve to be.
FUUUUUUCK!!!!!!!!
Man, I have to tell you, I was so sick of the casual thing by the time I met her. I was done with the dating and the empty mornings with their awkward half-assed goodbyes.
It's only cool for so long.
I DON'T NEED THIS SHIT!
Fuck it, whatever.
Time to get back on the horse I guess. Time to throw romance in my back pocket again and do what my dick thinks is best.
It may not be fulfilling but it's a far cry from being a bitch, and in the end, I can do better.
Yeah, turn and walk away. Do it with a smile and a wink and don't look back.
It was fun while it lasted... if I don't think of all the effort I put in... and Brother, you wouldn't believe how many times I turned the other cheek.
All for the sake of that lying smile.
Bitch.
User Reviews
Submitted by Stabkill (user info) at 2005-09-10 05:18:36 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by HadToBeDone (user info) at 2005-09-09 10:27:21 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
UBERLORD, MOTHERFUCKER!!!! WOO!!!!
Submitted by JonnyX (user info) at 2005-09-02 16:16:05 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
cut and run, and don't forget to score some last sex on the way out the door - try anal, she's gonna be gone soon anyways...
Submitted by spamtrap50 (user info) at 2005-09-02 12:44:12 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Brand new Angry Kansan!
Submitted by Mike00295 (user info) at 2005-09-02 12:17:29 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by HadToBeDone (user info) at 2005-09-02 11:13:08 (#)
Ranking: 2
Snark for Uberlord!!!
----------
True Dat.
LWF
http://www.ubersite.com/m/74448
Submitted by GodLovesALittleLovin (user info) at 2005-09-02 11:16:54 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by HadToBeDone (user info) at 2005-09-02 11:13:08 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Snark for Uberlord!!!
Submitted by LadyPlural (user info) at 2005-09-02 10:58:12 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by electrictoothsyndrome (user info) at 2005-09-02 10:34:09 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
heh...
I've written this post before.
Good luck.
Submitted by FartSmeller (user info) at 2005-09-02 10:23:07 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I know that feeling...
Submitted by wookie (user info) at 2005-09-02 10:21:11 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by BobLobla (user info) at 2005-09-02 01:53:01 (#)
Ranking: 2
As always, +2
Submitted by sinna (user info) at 2005-09-02 07:48:08 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
This was spot on. I recognise that feeling.
Submitted by ozzy (user info) at 2005-09-02 07:08:27 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Saxon (user info) at 2005-09-02 00:58:13 (#)
Ranking: 2
This was good man. i liked this line "Time to throw romance in my back pocket again and do what my dick thinks is best"
Submitted by Berty (user info) at 2005-09-02 06:21:18 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by Chroniclysm (user info) at 2005-09-02 04:03:14 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Oh...never mind then. haha.
Submitted by Snark (user info) at 2005-09-02 03:49:36 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Chroniclysm (user info) at 2005-09-02 02:44:30 (#)
Ranking: 2
http://www.ubersite.com/m/72626
Good luck, sodier.
===============
Hahahahaha
This isn't a true story. It's just me playing with words and concepts.
Submitted by Chroniclysm (user info) at 2005-09-02 02:44:30 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
http://www.ubersite.com/m/72626
Good luck, sodier.
Submitted by Rima (user info) at 2005-09-02 02:34:28 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Maybe bitches hate you cause you're emo..
Submitted by Psycosis (user info) at 2005-09-02 02:15:05 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Chicks are so fucked up.
Submitted by BobLobla (user info) at 2005-09-02 01:53:01 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
As always, +2
Submitted by Saxon (user info) at 2005-09-02 00:58:13 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
This was good man. i liked this line "Time to throw romance in my back pocket again and do what my dick thinks is best"
Submitted by FunnyAsCancer (user info) at 2005-09-02 00:34:25 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
You transcribed my thoughts, you sick bastard.
Get out of my head.
Submitted by EvolvedChicken (user info) at 2005-09-02 00:12:05 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Don't think with your crotch too much. I learned that the hard way.