My Stepfather Is A Pissant - Why? (836 hits)
Category: NoneRating: 1.3 on 21 reviews (Rate this item) (V)
Submitted by Laura (View user info) at 2005-09-05 01:17:58 EDT
My mother has been divorced five times. Why? Well, I'm not completely sure. She's given all her husbands lots of orgasms, I'm sure.
In fact, she's been through three husbands since I was born. She divorced my father when I was two months old, and then married my first stepfather - who is more like my real father - when I was five months old.
When I was ten, she divorced him for no reason at all. She actually had to make up a reason, which was "I'm converting to southern Baptism, but he was Catholic before we met. Therefore, I cannot remain married." Eight months later, she married my second stepdad. He was fun. He's 34, and she's 52.
I actually thought they were going to be happy together. A year into their marriage, they had a fight, but stayed together. But then this evening, when I got home from work, my stepfather was on top of a 19-year-old girl, fucking her brains out on the couch. That's grand.
How could I handle a situation like that? I'm not entirely sure about that, either. I've not cried over the fact that I've got to tell my mother that she's not good enough, and that she's being cheated on. I've not cried over the fact that he could do such a thing, when I've opened up to him, and kept them together before, and helped them through their problems.
There are four stages of acceptance - denial, depression, anger, and acceptance. I've experienced those stages on all my problems in the past, but I only feel confused.
For the insensitive people (men), I'll throw in something somewhat slap stick.
Why has my mother been through six marriages? She must have stopped giving head after she married.
I honestly don't give a damn how any of you rate this post. I'm sure it's boring and sucks big hairy ones.
My friends laugh with me and never at me, and the rest don't get a piece of my birthday cake.
User Reviews
Submitted by JonnyX (user info) at 2005-09-06 17:42:57 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
"i hope you choke on your dogs dick,"
Submitted by CoreaPeekay (user info) at 2005-09-05 15:54:52 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Well from what youve said your mother left most of the time, so why don't you ask her?
Submitted by TheGirlWithoutATitle (user info) at 2005-09-05 15:01:47 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Yeah, I know the girl. She was in my English class at ENMU last year. I've always hated her.
I had a dream that I got so pissed off, I killed my stepfather. And then my mother. And then my sister. And then every other person who would find out that they were dead. I think I'll write a story about it.
Holy shit, average rating of 1.5? I'll post about my fucked up hick family from now on.
But no random asshole has -2ed this with "i hope you choke on your dogs dick," yet. We'll see.
Submitted by BattlePope (user info) at 2005-09-05 14:53:53 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
+1 for the couch fucking action
Submitted by c1ndy (user info) at 2005-09-05 14:16:07 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
wow.
I'm never getting married again: I can't face planning another wedding for a start. I'll be the one celebrating my 50th wedding anniversary!
Submitted by ICO (user info) at 2005-09-05 07:29:28 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Sounds like you're living through American Beauty, more or less. Did you know the girl he was doing?
Submitted by Berty (user info) at 2005-09-05 06:12:49 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by d_prime (user info) at 2005-09-05 06:04:25 (#)
Ranking: 2
It's not that people are so extremely divorcable that's odd. It's why people continue to marry them.
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Sometimes he can be quite sharp for a little person.
*pats D-prime on the head*
Submitted by d_prime (user info) at 2005-09-05 06:04:25 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
It's not that people are so extremely divorcable that's odd. It's why people continue to marry them.
Submitted by Barnymeinhoff (user info) at 2005-09-05 05:49:48 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
No Comment
Submitted by zoobie2000 (user info) at 2005-09-05 05:33:58 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by Berty (user info) at 2005-09-05 05:05:01 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Just remember that all relationships don't end badly and not all men are 'tards. Decent men are a dime a dozen and just waiting for someone to fall in love with, you can even treat most of them like shit and they'll still love you. You can then tear the beating heart from their chest, do a little dance on it and then shove it up they're arsehole before leaving them a bitter, broken mess.
Or you could be happy with them, it's a free country after all.
Submitted by Fabit (user info) at 2005-09-05 04:42:30 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by moneyshotforyou (user info) at 2005-09-05 04:07:31 (#)
Ranking: 0
Professional help
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Doesn't that mean gun shop in the US? If by professional help she means Gun Shop then do it, do it now. If by professional help she means professional cleaners to get the stains out of the sofa, then cool, if by professional help she means therapists then nah - blatant waste of cashola.
Submitted by moneyshotforyou (user info) at 2005-09-05 04:07:31 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Professional help
Submitted by FilthyAssistant (user info) at 2005-09-05 03:37:49 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Wash your hands of it. Clearly neither of them are the full shilling.
Submitted by spamtrap50 (user info) at 2005-09-05 02:38:59 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Why has my mother been through six marriages? She must have stopped giving head after she married.
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Yeah probably. Let this be a lesson to the rest of you bee-atches.
Submitted by Istaros (user info) at 2005-09-05 02:05:11 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
perhaps she's kept a running tally? a scoreboard, so to speak?
"OK honey i've scheduled you for three ejaculations on Thursday but i'll need to go to my yoga class first so don't bother with getting the hot tub started until 2 in the afternoon AT LEAST"
Submitted by Istaros (user info) at 2005-09-05 02:04:11 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
"She's given all her husbands lots of orgasms, I'm sure."
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
Submitted by badassmofo (user info) at 2005-09-05 01:54:34 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I thought about telling you that but sometimes people are like 'hey, that's my mom and she has feelings and blah blah blah.'
If you're cool with letting it be then that is a good choice.
Submitted by TheGirlWithoutATitle (user info) at 2005-09-05 01:45:13 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
I think I'll just let it run its course...
...and hope he got the clap.
Submitted by badassmofo (user info) at 2005-09-05 01:37:13 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
I guess the question is how emotionally stable is your mother. I mean is she is on shaky gournd then you telling her about this is not going to work, you'll be the scapegoat. She'll say things like 'why would you say something like that' and 'you've always hated him.'
Bleh...it gets messy, but if you think she will believe you then do it. If you don't well then just get him caught or an anonymous letter or something.
Submitted by williamson (user info) at 2005-09-05 01:20:20 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Sounds like you have quite the fucked up family.