Diary Of A Kaote - part 6 (605 hits)
Category: NoneLabels: Kaote
Rating: 1.92 on 15 reviews (Rate this item) (V)
Submitted by kaos-king (View user info) at 2005-09-14 15:32:56 EDT
Last Chapter - http://www.ubersite.com/m/75078
KNOCK -KNOCK
"Just a minute"
Ed waited outside the door, looking around the dorm floor. Posters of all kinds announced various get togethers and activities. Some one had scribbled all over a sorority rush flyer with a magic marker and another sheet of paper called for a blood donation at the student union on the fifth. The door he had rapped on had an upside down peace sign scrawled on it with tempera paint. Just as he was considering the ramifications of this, it swung open.
A girl with huge breasts and short red hair stood there with a bag of cherries.
"Want one?"
"Nope."
"Social or business?"
"Little of both."
"Enter or your own free will, blah, blah, blah..."
Ed followed the girl into her dorm room. It was relatively basic, with a few posters, actually pretty clean all things considered. Alkaline Trio blared in the background and the window was covered with a frilly tapestry.
"Been a while Ed. Heard you got yourself a protégé. How's that going?"
"That's why I'm here, Lindsey."
"Let me guess, you fucked it up."
"Why do you immediately assume that."
"Because I actually know you, Ed. We've been friends how long?"
"Since first semester."
"Yeah, who would have guessed both our dumb asses would end up at school together. What are the odds?"
"Yeah, you gamble like I do."
"Edward, what do you want?"
Ed told her all about Andrea. How he had met her at a study group and became her friend. How he had discovered her cancer and cured her of it. How his Chaos Magick had directly altered her path, marking her as a Minor Kaote, stripping her from the laws of Paradox. How they had spent so much time training, him teaching her all the ways to manipulate her new found abilities. How close they had become.
Ed told Lindsey about the Avatar Conclave of Chaos Agents. Of how everyone had been interested in Andrea's progress. Of how they all assumed the two of them were sleeping together. Of how he and the young Avatar Natalie had ended up in bed together back in Australia. Of how that had made him feel about himself and Andrea.
Lindsey listened quietly the whole time, popping cherries in her mouth. When Ed finished she put the bag of fruit back in her mini fridge and then changed CD's. Without saying a word she left the room. Ed sat there, somewhat confused. Of course, when dealing with Lindsey, you just kinda had to go along with her. She did things in her own way. Who knew what she was up to.
After five minutes, Ed was ready to leave. He was sure he could track the girl down using his powers but he shouldn't have to do that. God damn it! If only she would be a little more open about things, she would...
Lindsey came strolling back into her room with an arm load of laundry.
"You could have just told me you were washing your clothes!"
"Yes, but one, it was more fun this way, and two, I needed some time to think. Essentially, you are concerned about the fact that you think you should have feeling for a girl. You don't even know if you do, in fact, like her. It's all conjecture."
"Ummm, yeah."
"Edward Sands, You are a fucking idiot."
"Thank you, but that doesn't help me."
"Main question, do you have any idea if she has any romantic interest in your dumb ass?"
"I have no idea," sighed Ed. "Ever since she's gotten skilled in the Chaos, I haven't been able to read her."
"Good. That means you have to struggle through this like a normal person."
"That's especially rich coming from you."
"Never said I was normal. Anyway, you need to figure out if she cares for you. If she doesn't, this is all a moot point. Stop being such a sad bastard all the time. You think too much about this shit."
"You're probably right."
"Of course I am. Shit, I'm out of cigarettes. Wanna run home with me while I grab another pack?"
"Sure."
Lindsey kissed her first two fingers twice and flicked them at the ceiling. Flames came cascading down, engulfing both of them. The fires licked all around the room until it became an inferno. When they dissipated, both Ed and Lindsey stood on packed brimstone.
Dry heat rolled across the barren landscape and the stench of rotting flesh filled the air. Clouds of smoke filled a sky where a crimson sun hovered. Legions of gigantic bats flew close overhead, screeching out the names of the damned. In the distance, the fabled city of Dis could be seen flickering with the lights of infernal glories. Here in the Necropolis, the village of fallen, Demonic herds roamed back and forth looking for stray flesh to wet their teeth on.
Ed had been to Hell quite a few times.
User Reviews
Submitted by Axolotl (user info) at 2006-10-26 13:45:57 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Cool turn in the story.
Submitted by munkeypants (user info) at 2006-09-30 17:15:16 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by Ditka (user info) at 2006-01-07 22:50:13 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Auto +2 already read series just giving author his due.
Submitted by RyuFu (user info) at 2005-09-28 11:24:25 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Coolness.
Submitted by LadyPlural (user info) at 2005-09-16 08:36:58 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
What is it with you and hell?
Submitted by iradney (user info) at 2005-09-15 07:07:04 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by Average_Dan (user info) at 2005-09-15 03:04:23 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Not much happening here, but +2 for the series....and hell!
Submitted by Benny (user info) at 2005-09-14 23:01:36 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
This was well written but you have a point when you say that nothing really happens. It might have been good if this were a longer post.
I will continue to read as long as you continue to write.
Submitted by thecaes (user info) at 2005-09-14 22:57:26 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
I am befuddled, but still enjoy the writing.
It seems that too many of these installments have big surprises...so much so that the impact of said surprises are getting dulled. Like, "Okay, he's a powerful mage...okay he's talking to an aspect of death...and that chick's a demon." Just, bang bang bang. Careful not to overdo it.
Seems like every time I rate one of your pieces I say something bad. I don't mean to...I'm just offering criticism. I like a lot of stuff about your writing, and I'm liking Ed better now as his personality becomes a little more defined.
Submitted by Yes (user info) at 2005-09-14 16:07:57 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
yar.
Submitted by Brdn_Nkd (user info) at 2005-09-14 15:58:24 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Definitely stick around for saving grace. I really enjoyed that one. this is, as always, good stuff.
Submitted by Crystle (user info) at 2005-09-14 15:38:51 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by kaos-king (user info) at 2005-09-14 15:37:59 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Not much excitement in this episode, but I'm trying to build up the tension between Ed and Andrea. Only 2 more chapters left in the "Diary" series, and then it's on to the series called "Saving Grace." It's different but the same. Ed will play a vital role in the story and I'll introduce a major new character. I thank everybody for reading so far. Please hang on with me....
Submitted by Bubba2341 (user info) at 2005-09-14 15:37:36 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Keep 'em comin'
Submitted by JonnyX (user info) at 2005-09-14 15:37:32 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
starting to get a little TOO 'chaosy', but keep it up...