Crap Joke (664 hits)
Category: HumorRating: 0.69 on 16 reviews (Rate this item) (V)
Submitted by Richard Whitely (View user info) at 2005-09-20 06:20:11 EDT
One day Mrs. Jones went to have a talk with the minister at the
local church. "Reverend," she said, "I have a problem, my
husband keeps falling asleep during your sermons. It's very
embarrassing. What should I do?"
"I have an idea," said the minister. "Take this hatpin with you.
I will be able to tell when Mr. Jones is sleeping, and I will
motion to you at specific times. When I motion, you give him a
good poke in the leg."
In church the following Sunday, Mr. Jones dozed off. Noticing
this, the preacher put his plan to work. "And who made the
ultimate sacrifice for you?" he said, nodding to Mrs. Jones.
"Jesus!", Jones cried as his wife jabbed him the leg with the
hatpin.
"Yes, you are right, Mr. Jones," said the minister. Soon, Mr.
Jones nodded off again. Again, the minister noticed. "Who is
your redeemer?" he asked the congregation, motioning towards
Mrs. Jones.
"God!" Mr. Jones cried out as he was stuck again with the hatpin.
"Right again," said the minister, smiling. Before long, Mr.
Jones again winked off. However, this time the minister did not
notice. As he picked up the tempo of his sermon, he made a few
motions that Mrs. Jones mistook as signals to bayonet her
husband with the hatpin again.
The minister asked, "And what did Eve say to Adam after she bore
him his 99th son?"
Mrs. Jones poked her husband, who yelled, "You stick that
goddamned thing in me one more time and I'll break it in half
and shove it up your ass!"
"Amen," replied the congregation.
User Reviews
Submitted by Zoidberg (user info) at 2005-09-28 16:43:17 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
never heard this before
Submitted by Method (user info) at 2005-09-28 08:40:05 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Submitted by Richard_Whitely (user info) at 2005-09-28 08:36:36 (#)
Ranking: -2
Submitted by Method (user info) at 2005-09-28 08:35:00 (#)
Ranking: -2
can I join in your retaliatory -2 war?
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Certainly, the more the merrier
Submitted by Chicane (user info) at 2005-09-28 08:24:44 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
old shit
Submitted by miss_tila (user info) at 2005-09-20 13:03:47 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Just when thought I heard them all.
Submitted by Pentameter (user info) at 2005-09-20 11:59:20 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
HAHAHAHAHAHAHA
I never heard that one before.
Submitted by joedaddy (user info) at 2005-09-20 11:40:59 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
Submitted by missflibble (user info) at 2005-09-20 10:35:31 (#)
Ranking: 2
it may be an oldie but it's a goodie.
Submitted by nya_nyo (user info) at 2005-09-20 10:53:52 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
good for a .05 second laugh
Submitted by missflibble (user info) at 2005-09-20 10:35:31 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
it may be an oldie but it's a goodie.
Submitted by mbstateside (user info) at 2005-09-20 10:34:07 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
Submitted by Magic_Monkey (user info) at 2005-09-20 07:27:08 (#)
Ranking: 2
Needs more cowbell
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I concur
Submitted by williamson (user info) at 2005-09-20 09:21:23 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Sorry, but old.
Submitted by DeathJester (user info) at 2005-09-20 08:33:54 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
Oh man, this is so old...
Thanks for reminding me of it, though!
Submitted by Average_Dan (user info) at 2005-09-20 08:15:04 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
AHHAHAHAHHAHAHAHHA!!!
Submitted by Fabit (user info) at 2005-09-20 07:32:52 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Hasn't been round here yet.
Cool
Submitted by Magic_Monkey (user info) at 2005-09-20 07:27:08 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Needs more cowbell
Submitted by Berty (user info) at 2005-09-20 06:58:56 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Heh, heh. Haven't heard that one.
Submitted by GaidinCanuck (user info) at 2005-09-20 06:43:50 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
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