Are you an Internet Addict (571 hits)
Category: Computers & InternetRating: -1.9 on 20 reviews (Rate this item) (V)
Submitted by DamianD<damiand.at.fsmail.net> (View user info) at 2005-09-20 08:11:50 EDT
WARNING! I DO NOT HAVE ORIGINAL MATERIAL. IF I FIND SOMETHING AMUSING I SHARE IT WITH YOU.
IF YOU ARE GOING TO -2 FOR CUT AND PASTE ANYWAY DO NOT PROCEED
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You an Internet addict?
You Might Be An Internet Addict If...
You step out of your room and realize that your parents have moved and you don't have a clue as to when it happened.
Your bookmark list takes 15 minutes to go from top to bottom.
Your nightmares are in HTML and GIFS.
You turn off your modem and get this awful empty feeling, like you just pulled the plug on a loved one.
You start introducing yourself as "Jim at net dot com"
Your heart races faster and beats irregularly each time you see a new WWW site address on TV.
You turn on your intercom when leaving the room so you can hear if new e-mail arrives.
Your wife drapes a blond wig over your monitor to remind you of what she looks like.
All of your friends have an @ in their names.
When looking at a web page full of someone else's links, you notice all of them are already highlighted in purple.
Your dog has its own home page.
You can't call your mother... She doesn't have a modem.
You check your mail. It says "no new messages." So you check it again.
Your phone bill is a heavy as a brick.
You write your homework in HTML and give your instructor the URL.
You don't know the sex of three of your closest friends, because they have neutral nicknames and you never bothered to ask.
Your husband tells you that he has had the beard for 2 months
You wake up at 3 a.m. to go to the bathroom and stop and check your e-mail on the way back to bed.
You tell the kids they can't use the computer because "Daddy's got work to do" -- even though you don't have a job.
You buy a Captain Kirk chair with a built-in keyboard and mouse.
Your wife makes a new rule: "The computer cannot come to bed."
You get a tattoo that says "This body best viewed with Netscape 3.0 or higher."
You never have to deal with busy signals when calling your ISP... because you never log off.
The last girl you picked up was only a GIF.
You ask a plumber how much it would cost to replace the chair in front of your computer with a toilet.
Your wife says communication is important in a marriage... so you buy another computer and install a second phone line so the two of you can chat.
As your car crashes through the guardrail on a mountain road, your first instinct is to search for the "back" button.
User Reviews
Submitted by Awko (user info) at 2005-09-20 11:38:48 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Yes, I am.
Now stfu n00b b4 I zerg rush j00.
^__^ KEKEKEKEKEKEKKEKEKEKEKE!
Submitted by Caulaincourt (user info) at 2005-09-20 11:35:23 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
No Comment
Submitted by FartSmeller (user info) at 2005-09-20 11:28:31 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
-2 FOR CUT AND PASTE ANYWAY
Submitted by Richard_Whitely (user info) at 2005-09-20 09:11:35 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
"Your wife drapes a blond wig over your monitor to remind you of what she looks like."
Unlikely you fucking virgin.
"You tell the kids they can't use the computer because "Daddy's got work to do" -- even though you don't have a job."
Also Unlikely as i doubt you even have a pair.
As your car crashes through the guardrail on a mountain road, your first instinct is to search for the "back" button.
Somehow i doubt we are that lucky.
Submitted by Sphagnum (user info) at 2005-09-20 09:07:01 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
WARNING! I DO NOT HAVE ORIGINAL MATERIAL. IF I FIND SOMETHING AMUSING I SHARE IT WITH YOU.
IF YOU ARE GOING TO -2 FOR CUT AND PASTE ANYWAY DO NOT PROCEED.
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-2 for spoiling all of my fun.
Submitted by sinna (user info) at 2005-09-20 08:53:37 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Posting non-stop is not mandatory. If you can't think of anything to post, then fucking don't.
Submitted by Insanethemind (user info) at 2005-09-20 08:49:37 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
this would have sucked even if you had written it.
Submitted by Circe (user info) at 2005-09-20 08:42:29 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Submitted by DeathJester (user info) at 2005-09-20 08:29:56 (#)
Ranking: -2
You might be an Internet Addict if:
You post on Ubersite.
I know it's been said before, but I felt that reposting something that has already been done in the past was in line with this post's theme.
Sorry if the apostrophes are wrong, Circe...
_________
It's okay. I pasted it in here and fixed it and stared at it until I felt better.
Submitted by euripidestrousers (user info) at 2005-09-20 08:38:08 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
No Comment
Submitted by Berty (user info) at 2005-09-20 08:38:03 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Submitted by Merlina (user info) at 2005-09-20 08:33:58 (#)
Ranking: -2
Submitted by theroo (user info) at 2005-09-20 08:24:12 (#)
Ranking: -2
I didn't proceed.
I preceded to the rate this item post.
WARNING - IF YOU HAVE NOTHING ORIGINAL... DON'T FUCKING POST
Submitted by Merlina (user info) at 2005-09-20 08:33:58 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Submitted by theroo (user info) at 2005-09-20 08:24:12 (#)
Ranking: -2
I didn't proceed.
I preceded to the rate this item post.
WARNING - IF YOU HAVE NOTHING ORIGINAL... DON'T FUCKING POST
Submitted by DeathJester (user info) at 2005-09-20 08:29:56 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
You might be an Internet Addict if:
You post on Ubersite.
I know it's been said before, but I felt that reposting something that has already been done in the past was in line with this posts' theme.
Sorry if the apostrophes are wrong, Circe...
Submitted by ghola (user info) at 2005-09-20 08:28:39 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
same as below
Submitted by Average_Dan (user info) at 2005-09-20 08:27:33 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
This should go on your blog page, not Uber
Submitted by blank_mind (user info) at 2005-09-20 08:27:31 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
-FUCKING 2 DIE
Submitted by XFile (user info) at 2005-09-20 08:27:21 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Not only was it a cut and paste job, but seriously: who uses a modem these days anyway?
Submitted by hcp28 (user info) at 2005-09-20 08:24:47 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
-2 because it just wasn't funny.
Submitted by theroo (user info) at 2005-09-20 08:24:12 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
I didn't proceed.
I preceded to the rate this item post.
WARNING - IF YOU HAVE NOTHING ORIGINAL... DON'T FUCKING POST
Submitted by ozzy (user info) at 2005-09-20 08:18:03 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
-2, not just because of the cut & paste. It wasn't actually that funny.
Submitted by Phallic_Cymbals (user info) at 2005-09-20 08:14:49 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
I minus 2 for cut and paste out of principle, i don't need to read the pilfered material.