Sunday in Hlinsko A POEM BY FLARN-DORFAR (1234 hits)
Category: NoneRating: -1.11 on 68 reviews (Rate this item) (V)
Submitted by flarn dorfar (View user info) at 2005-09-25 06:05:50 EDT
I have been thinking all morning, on this the Saviours day, Christ's good day, about my hometown of Hlinsko. Home of the late Petra Lysych my first love, whom I lost to the terrible drug heroin. It has been quite an upsetting and lonely morning - especially with the vodka I drank last night. A night of heavy drinking watching a local rock band called Clitoral Erosion. I'm tired and weepy, missing my Petra. Petra was so sweet, the last born of the local communist party leaders children. I still see him, though he's lost in memories and Lenin. He cut his arm in a log cutting accident and lives in poverty. Anyhow, i am thinking about the Sunday service in her home church. Thinking about her poor grandmothers family bible with its communist party logo on the inner cover. Thinking about her love of Weetabix and how we used to dream of Moscow. We would have got a flat together and sold hot tea to the local drunks. Dreams lost in time and the eroding influence of America.
Sweet Priest..
Speak the holy words of Christ,
Tell me of the ancient dreams in Israel.
Tell me of the ancient dreams in Betheleham.
Through your kind eyes I see Jesus
Through Jesus I see my Petra again.
Speak the holy words of love.
With a needle in your arm and a packet of L & M.
Tell me of the sweet taste of Fyschinz
Tell me of Boris your damned dealer man.
Through your lost eyes I see demons
Through demons I see hell
Sweet Priest..
Speak the holy words of Moses
Tell me of Noah and his vineyard.
Tell me of the blessed peace to be found in Christ.
Through your kind eyes I see Uncle Josef
Through Josef I see the peace of the 1930's
Sweet Jesus..
I see Jesus Son of God,
With a needle in his vein and a smile on his face.
I see Mary mother of Christ,
With a needle in her vein and a smile on her face.
I see my sweet preist,
With a needle in his vein and excrement on his vestaments.
I see Uncle Josef,
With a needle in his vein and blood on his pillow.
Sweet Jesus..
Speak the holy words of your father,
Tell Petra I saw Clitirol Erosion in the beerhall last night.
Speak the holy words from long ago.
Tell Petra the Drummer Vladmir's dedicated a song to her.
Speak the holy words from the great book.
Tell Petra the song was her favourite.
Speak the holy words from the cross
Tell Petra the song was "slivovica orgy"
I pray with you on this the holy day.
Pray for Topol M
Pray for sweet vodka
Pray for Uncle Josef
Pray for Father Msychvar
Pray for Petra Lysych
Pray to be in the arms of Christ..
Jesus I would spend a lifetime on the cross, nailed to death with you.
For one more moment with my Petra.
User Reviews
Submitted by Mike00295 (user info) at 2005-10-13 17:15:32 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Eat my Flarn pal
Submitted by Mike00295 (user info) at 2005-10-13 17:15:04 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Shit
Submitted by Mike00295 (user info) at 2005-10-13 17:14:51 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Another wave for your bitch-ass.
Submitted by Method (user info) at 2005-09-25 12:56:02 (#)
Ranking: -2
-2nami
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Submitted by COMountain (user info) at 2005-10-13 17:08:09 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
holy shit. you're still here?
I didn't read this garbage.
Submitted by domenad (user info) at 2005-10-01 12:28:33 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
No Comment
Submitted by alas_me (user info) at 2005-10-01 11:38:29 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
I am an Englishman not at all from the Czech republic and was never anyones alter, though i was once on this site as Lord Zinor. The whole Flarn-dorfar thing was meant to be a joke though some people actually got sucked inti it critising the poetry and the content. I mean references to Weetabix, Grandfatherly abuse and spitting on Germans can only ever be a joke - though some people fell for it. England is and England will always be the home of true alternative humour. So if anyone wants to accuse me of being an alter, well yes I am an later now of flarn-dorfar and lord zinor. Wont be doing any retaliatory -2s this time, though expect some comedy genius.
Submitted by JonnyX (user info) at 2005-09-26 17:16:34 EDT (#)
Ranking: -1
smells like a fart in here
Submitted by DudeThatsBOSH (user info) at 2005-09-26 13:02:17 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
The end of the song is another Banjo solo by earl scruggs while me and wesley willis scream "FLARN-DORFAR WAAS A FUCKIN FAGGOT IN THE FIRST PLACE!!" over and over again.
25 minutes later the song fades out into silence, until I come back and say 'Ya fuckin QUEER' 5 seconds later.
Submitted by DudeThatsBOSH (user info) at 2005-09-26 13:00:01 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Flarn-Dorfar was a fuckin FAGGOT in the first place!! (part 2) - A SONG by Dude, thats BOSH!
Lyrics: Dude, thats BOSH!, Wesley Willis
Banjo: Earl Scruggs
Sunday was so bosh I don't even know what to do
I spent it humping trees
Flarn Dorfar on the other hand is a giant Brontosaurus DUMP
He really smells like crap.
Flarn-Dorfar was a fuckin FAGGOT in the first place!!
Flarn-Dorfar was a fuckin FAGGOT in the first place!!
Flarn-Dorfar was a fuckin FAGGOT in the first place!!
Flarn-Dorfar was a fuckin FAGGOT in the first place!!
Farn-Dorfar thought he was bad
He was a fucking asshole in the first place
He got knocked to the floor
Flarn-Dorfar was a fuckin FAGGOT in the first place!!
Flarn-Dorfar was a fuckin FAGGOT in the first place!!
Flarn-Dorfar was a fuckin FAGGOT in the first place!!
Flarn-Dorfar was a fuckin FAGGOT in the first place!!
Flarn-Dorfar had a picture of a pink pony on his chest last time I saw him
He was drawing on my nerves
I got mad at his drunk ass
I gave him a war hell ride
Flarn-Dorfar was a fuckin FAGGOT in the first place!!
Flarn-Dorfar was a fuckin FAGGOT in the first place!!
Flarn-Dorfar was a fuckin FAGGOT in the first place!!
Flarn-Dorfar was a fuckin FAGGOT in the first place!!
[BANJO SOLO]
I saw Flran-Dorfar beating the hell out of some girlscouts
He knocked them to the floor
I ran over and knocked him to the floor
He was being such a roughneck, But I got free girlscout cookies
FAG!
Submitted by DudeThatsBOSH (user info) at 2005-09-26 12:46:23 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Hey, im writing a new song about you, ill give you this -2 to warm you up to it.
Submitted by TigerLilly (user info) at 2005-09-26 12:30:24 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2005-09-25 18:46:58 (#)
Ranking: -2
Shut off your computer, throw it out the window...and jump after it.
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God you fucking crack me up.
Submitted by flarn-dorfar (user info) at 2005-09-26 12:15:14 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Thanks for at least giving me half a days peace, and dont worry im working on today's post now
Submitted by DeathJester (user info) at 2005-09-26 06:46:41 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Sweet Jesus...
Submitted by Istaros (user info) at 2005-09-26 00:55:14 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
"Now bend over and grab your ankles, sugar-britches. If you really loved me you would tattoo some titties on your back for me."
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
Submitted by ajanssen (user info) at 2005-09-25 22:06:17 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Submitted by flarn-dorfar (user info) at 2005-09-25 12:27:37 (#)
Ranking: -2
There is nothing I like less than dogs. Cats are a far better creature.
______________________________________
No one gives a fuck what you think. Youre opinion is meaningless here much like your posts.
Submitted by Chinaski (user info) at 2005-09-25 21:41:09 EDT (#)
Ranking: -1
meh.
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2005-09-25 18:46:58 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Shut off your computer, throw it out the window...and jump after it.
Submitted by ajanssen (user info) at 2005-09-25 18:10:35 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Yes, youve got me all figured out. Now how about you post something original that took some thought? All your posts so far have been garbage. This isnt just my opinion. It looks like almost everyone else shares this same viewpoint.
Submitted by professorfuckface (user info) at 2005-09-25 18:07:39 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
No Comment
Submitted by flarn-dorfar (user info) at 2005-09-25 18:03:14 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
You will never forgive me for my first few cut and paste posts. THe last few have been serious original efforts. Why are you so crude? You must be quite a motherless animal in real life. Did your poor mother die when you were a child? Is this why you are so angry?
Submitted by ajanssen (user info) at 2005-09-25 17:57:35 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Love you too, candy-ass. Now bend over and grab your ankles, sugar-britches. If you really loved me you would tattoo some titties on your back for me. If this is what you consider art you are at the wrong website. This site is geared more towards original works of writing not cut and paste "herion" bullshit. Maybe in your country this is art but I think most of the rest of the world would disagree. Dont you think its strange that almost everyone has given you a -2 and told you this is horsehit? Can you not take a hint? Get off your high horse and post something original or entertaining. This isnt just me. As you can see this opinion is shared by most. So far your posts fucking suck.
Submitted by flarn-dorfar (user info) at 2005-09-25 17:51:52 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
I think genuine intelligent people would see the serious artistic merit and underlying emotional intent of my posts. You are a long way from Christ and a long way from art my freind. Jesus said "love thy enemy" and so I love you.
Submitted by ajanssen (user info) at 2005-09-25 17:49:13 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Fag
Submitted by ajanssen (user info) at 2005-09-25 17:49:06 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Submitted by flarn-dorfar (user info) at 2005-09-25 17:46:23 (#)
Ranking: -2
If i get banned I will draw attention to your multiple assaults on my posts, I sense a child like whimper under your last comment "none of your ratings will count" like "I hope they dont". Heres the plan and I am a man of my word. From tommorow ill will not rate any of your posts ever again. I dont expect you to say anything similar - that is just my word. In fact ill change the -2 on this post now to +2 as a goodwill gesture., I will then log off and pray for you.
______________________
I cant deposit ratings in my bank account. Just trying to let you know the way things work as you obviously have your head up your ass. Post something of merit and stop with the immature nerdfights and im sure the -2s will stop from everyone.
Submitted by ajanssen (user info) at 2005-09-25 17:47:01 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
forgive me, i know not what i do
Submitted by ajanssen (user info) at 2005-09-25 17:46:48 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Sorry, im all strung out on herion
Submitted by ajanssen (user info) at 2005-09-25 17:46:17 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Why put off for tommorrow what we can do today?
Submitted by ajanssen (user info) at 2005-09-25 17:45:03 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Submitted by flarn-dorfar (user info) at 2005-09-25 17:41:55 (#)
Ranking: -2
to
___________
fag
Submitted by ajanssen (user info) at 2005-09-25 17:44:45 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Submitted by flarn-dorfar (user info) at 2005-09-25 17:42:05 (#)
Ranking: -2
bed
_______________
fag
Submitted by ajanssen (user info) at 2005-09-25 17:44:27 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Submitted by flarn-dorfar (user info) at 2005-09-25 17:42:30 (#)
Ranking: -2
We can continue this tommrow is you like
---------------
fag
Submitted by ajanssen (user info) at 2005-09-25 17:42:42 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
When you get banned none of your ratings will count.
Submitted by ajanssen (user info) at 2005-09-25 17:42:22 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
No Comment
Submitted by flarn-dorfar (user info) at 2005-09-25 17:41:10 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
See if I care ill -2 myself
Submitted by flarn-dorfar (user info) at 2005-09-25 17:40:35 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Anyhow
Submitted by ajanssen (user info) at 2005-09-25 17:38:40 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
No?
Submitted by ajanssen (user info) at 2005-09-25 17:38:31 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Done yet?
Submitted by ajanssen (user info) at 2005-09-25 17:38:13 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Just tell me when
Submitted by ajanssen (user info) at 2005-09-25 17:38:03 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
How about now?
Submitted by ajanssen (user info) at 2005-09-25 17:37:54 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Still playing?
Submitted by ajanssen (user info) at 2005-09-25 17:36:43 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Submitted by flarn-dorfar (user info) at 2005-09-25 17:20:47 (#)
Ranking: -2
Is this all YOU have got. Im trying to address serious issues, and your last few posts start with the word "fuck". Lots of effort here. Maybe you should get a new log in and go back to those primary school English lessons and try and find some inspiration
________________________________
Lets play then motherfucker.
Submitted by ajanssen (user info) at 2005-09-25 17:35:26 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Im not trying to silence anyone. Im just trying to help you not get so many -2s. Suit yourself, I dont give a fuck. No sweat off my balls.
Submitted by fluff (user info) at 2005-09-25 17:31:31 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
ok now you accuse me of facism. You are making a mockery out of yourself.
I tried; but
This conversation is over.
Submitted by flarn-dorfar (user info) at 2005-09-25 17:23:38 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
There is room for both of us if you jsut left me alone. Sounds almost like censorship on a free site "get a new log-in". Im not afraid of who I am or what I post. Yes I love Jesus, yes I think Heroin is an issue that warrants debate. Try and silence me, try and get me to tow the line and right your sort of nonesense posts. Try and silence me, this my freind is Facism.
Submitted by ajanssen (user info) at 2005-09-25 17:17:36 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Its not being cruel. Uber is full of shit posters and alters as it is. We dont need anymore. Get a new log-in and post something of merit. I think you really know how shitty these herion posts are. As smart as you claim to be this is all youve got?
Submitted by fluff (user info) at 2005-09-25 17:16:11 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Submitted by flarn-dorfar (user info) at 2005-09-25 16:58:04 (#)
Ranking: 0
Why does Fluff produce nothing but rate everything badly - maybe hes an alter! Is it time for a witchhunt!
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Witchhunt? Are you totally out of your mind now?
And do I even have to defend myself against this ridiculous accusation?
Submitted by ajanssen (user info) at 2005-09-25 17:15:44 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Im just trying to give you some honest advice as to how this site actally works. If you didnt care about ratings you wouldnt get your panties in a wad when people gave your shit posts the -2s they deserve. How about some decent content that doesnt involve copied "herion" advice or shitty poetry?
Submitted by fluff (user info) at 2005-09-25 17:12:05 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Submitted by flarn-dorfar (user info) at 2005-09-25 12:23:05 (#)
Ranking: -2
You are forever rating my posts but incapable of producing anything yourself. -2 for not being an active memeber of uber
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Nice retaliatory -2. Good excample of your god and jesus loving ignorant attitude.
1. I have taken the pictures for my post MYSELF with an analog camera. This was quite time intensive. Effort it's called. Unique it is. Not like your pathetic copy pasting. So much for incapable of producing anything of my own.
2. I am not an active member of uber? Are you totally braindead? You made it to my post. -2ed it. Seen my profile. Can you read you ignoramus piece of shit?
Submitted by flarn-dorfar (user info) at 2005-09-25 17:06:47 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
And Ajanssen, its not the -2s that worry me as im not here for ratings. The problem I have with people such as your self is the repetitive and cruel nature of your attacks. If it was just one comment and one -2 then I wouldnt retaliate - but some of the attacks on my posts have been so relentless it would be impossible to keep up with retaliatory -2s. Jesus watches us all and you all know it.
Submitted by flarn-dorfar (user info) at 2005-09-25 16:58:04 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Why does Fluff produce nothing but rate everything badly - maybe hes an alter! Is it time for a witchhunt!
Submitted by fluff (user info) at 2005-09-25 16:55:43 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
I tried to explain to you.
I tried to explain why I -2ed your posts. I would even have +ed a decent post or reply of yours if you had tried hard enough...
You reply with "Learn about Jesus"
ASSHOLE!
If you don't want us to rate and read DON'T TYPE! You faggot managed to make me angry. Just about as I was going to bed. I don't believe there is such an ignorant asshole as yourself. I really don't.
Ach...dammit...fucker
Submitted by ajanssen (user info) at 2005-09-25 16:55:04 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Honestly flarn, most people dont care whether or not you are a foreigner but your posts really do suck and the retaliatory -2s dont help. At Uber you have to get initiated with trial by fire. Lashing back just makes you look like an immature douche bag. Get a new log-in, do away with the poetry and "herion" posts, stop with the retaliatory -2s and youll be alright. Get with the fucking program and stop acting like a little girl. If I didnt know any better I would think that you bled once a month.
Submitted by flarn-dorfar (user info) at 2005-09-25 16:47:11 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
I am not an alter, how many times do I have to defend myself. The thing is there is room for all of us here on Ubersite. Isnt that meant to be the nature of a community - people coming together with different ideas and objectives?
Submitted by yeahthatme (user info) at 2005-09-25 16:37:51 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Does anyone else think this guy is either totally full of shit or an alter? Or is it just me?
Submitted by DudeThatsBOSH (user info) at 2005-09-25 16:10:53 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by ajanssen (user info) at 2005-09-25 15:33:14 (#)
Ranking: -2
Still at it?
Vagina blood fart
--
huahahaha
Submitted by ajanssen (user info) at 2005-09-25 15:33:14 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Still at it?
Vagina blood fart
Submitted by flarn-dorfar (user info) at 2005-09-25 13:06:39 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
My posts are essentially -2 proof as im not here to have a high rating but to tell my story - and you all seem to be coming back for more and more.
Submitted by Method (user info) at 2005-09-25 12:56:02 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
-2nami
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Submitted by Method (user info) at 2005-09-25 12:51:41 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Submitted by flarn-dorfar (user info) at 2005-09-25 12:26:32 (#)
Ranking: -2
Still rubbish, just came here to remind myself. Leave my posts alone and ill leave yours. Ill think youll fine youve -2ed my posts more than I can find the time to do yours.
------
Hey spanky, if you're going to -2 me, do it on a post that doesn't have 385 reviews, you'll do more damage to my OH SO PRECIOUS FUCKING RATING
i love retaliatory -2's, they're so engaging
Submitted by flarn-dorfar (user info) at 2005-09-25 12:21:10 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
No I dont care, I think its time you all learnt more about Jesus and Heroin - If you dont want to know dont read.
Submitted by fluff (user info) at 2005-09-25 11:55:41 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
I have read your posts. Rated them how I felt was appropriate. Your former posts consisted mainly of copy pastes and were about the same subject. Now this one poem here just made my eyes water. Brains of mine oozed out of my nose as I read it. I just don't like it. Period. This has nothing to do with me being jevenile or something. It's my opinion. Get over it. Be creative the next time (Poems of how much you bow down to jesus and your devotion to god won't do any good here). And please; as hard as this whole heroine thing might be to you; we are able to read that up in wikipedia and a dozen other places for ourselves. We know that heroine is a terrible drug. We already know...
Submitted by leilani (user info) at 2005-09-25 11:52:02 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Tvorite web-stranky?
Submitted by Method (user info) at 2005-09-25 10:33:23 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
No Comment
Submitted by HadToBeDone (user info) at 2005-09-25 10:09:45 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Submitted by flarn-dorfar (user info) at 2005-09-25 08:29:52 (#)
Ranking: 0
Please do not rate this post if all you intend to do is not read it and just give it -2
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Should have thought of that when you took down two of my 2 on 19 posts. You get -2s for life, regardless of what you post.
Submitted by forthewin (user info) at 2005-09-25 09:53:20 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
This was just too funny.
But not in a good way.
Submitted by flarn-dorfar (user info) at 2005-09-25 09:32:02 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Yet again I plead with you all that I am not an alter. Do you think I would have time for other posts. My problem has been attracting the attention of the wrong people from this site. These people being the juvenile, childish, bored uber users. Soon I will find my audience.
Submitted by Sphagnum (user info) at 2005-09-25 09:28:47 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Submitted by flarn-dorfar (user info) at 2005-09-25 08:29:52 (#)
Ranking: 0
Please do not rate this post if all you intend to do is not read it and just give it -2
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Fucking stupid alter that will end up getting 50000000000+hits before you're banned.
GO YOU!!!
Submitted by flarn-dorfar (user info) at 2005-09-25 08:29:52 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Please do not rate this post if all you intend to do is not read it and just give it -2
Submitted by fluff (user info) at 2005-09-25 06:17:58 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Get lost.