Neurotic Noir: Part 8 -- "Finally 20/20" (648 hits)
Category: Quotes & StoriesRating: 2 on 8 reviews (Rate this item) (V)
Submitted by RyuFu (View user info) at 2005-09-29 12:27:34 EDT
Part 1 - "Hole in the Head": http://www.ubersite.com/m/75075
Part 2 - "Perceptive Goth": http://www.ubersite.com/m/75152
Part 3 - "Sex and Tattoos": http://www.ubersite.com/m/75460
Part 4 - "Shpatë Dragua": http://www.ubersite.com/m/75602
Part 5 - "A Kiss for Each": http://www.ubersite.com/m/75721
Part 6 - "Cracked Safe/Broken Levee": http://www.ubersite.com/m/75913
Part 7 - "Coming Into Focus": http://www.ubersite.com/m/76074
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"So it's plainly obvious that he's filled with self-hatred. It's just unfortunate for you that you represent everything he hates about himself. To kill you can never be enough for him. He'll always have to live with what he considers a genetic defect. In his twisted mind, he has to torture you to find peace with himself."
"Wow, thanks for that one, Dr. Lilly. Can you prescribe some medication for me so I can forget all this shit again?"
"Hey, fuck you! I'm just trying to help!"
"I'm sorry, Lil." Her lips are soft and inviting in her fragile state. Or am I just overly sensitive in my own fragile state? "With all the memories flooding back into my mind, I just still can't remember exactly how my parents were...how you...it's just frustrating. Will you tell me how it happened?"
"Oh, Jack, please don't ask that of me..."
"Lil...I need to know. All I know now is that I want to put a few dozen bullets in Vin's body or die trying--nothing's gonna stop that. I need to know why I'm doing this...please, Lil."
Why she felt the need to put on mascara when we came back is beyond me. Her flood of tears make her look like Alice Cooper.
"Okay...let me get my laptop..."
Her laptop? One of her few possessions in this bare apartment. Why does she want that?
"I've always kept a sort of diary on this...not really an everyday diary, but more for the big things in my life."
" 'Big things?' "
"Yeah, you know, important things. Like when my family moved to the area, when I first met you, our prom, our 'wedding.' I think you should relive these moments as if they were fresh and not like they are old memories...it's going to be harsh..."
@~~>~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Vin asked me out ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~<~~@
I really like that cute boy from my English class. His name's 'Jetmir,' but everyone calls him 'Jack.' Just like I make everyone call me 'Lilly.' I just want to walk up to him and kiss him, lol. No, I want to be his teacher for health class, ROFLMAO. I think he likes me. I wore my blue tubetop today--the tiny one! I walked past the basketball court where he was playing with his friends. I think I made him miss a shot and he fell on his butt, hee hee hehe! I'd like to help him heal his butt, lol.
But then the weirdest thing happened. That big black guy Vin came out of nowhere and started talking to me. WTH? I mean, come on, he's just way to big for me to begin with. Plus I thought he was a big kill-whitey racist? I dunno, it was really weird. It totally freaked me out. He said he wanted to be my man and everything, and I was like 'uhhh, noo...' LOL.
I know he hates Jack more than anybody else so I think he was just using me. I think Jack likes me.
@~~>~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Jack's in the hospital ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~<~~@
OH MY GOD, OH MY GOD! Jack was in a car accident!! His parents just called my house, i'm gonna go visit him now..I told him not to stay too late at practice cuz it was gonna snoww!!
--
Oh my goooodd!!! I just got back from visiting him at the hospital....he's in a COMA!!! But it's not from the accident! The cops were there and they said the car must have slid on some ice and it hit Vin's parents!!! When the ambulance got there, the paramedics said they saw Vin sitting next to Jack crying and there was blood all over his fists...I HATE VIN I WISH HE DIES I HATE HIM I HATE HIM I HATE HIM....
@~~>~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ We got married ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~<~~@
We're such dorks! We all got soooo f'ing drunk at prom. 'Someone' spiked the punch. Of course, by 'someone' I mean Jack. He's such a cute little wigger. When he's with his friends, he's totally different than with me or when he's drunk. He got on stage in front of everyone and sang every word of "More Than Words." Nice rapper, hehe... Jimmy and James didn't seem to mind his behavior--they danced along to it cuz they were plastered too!!
So the limo took us to the boardwalk and we just walked all night. Out of nowhere he asked me to marry him!! WTF? We didn't have rings, so he convinced me to get that stupid Sword Dragon tattoo!! Right, like I'm part of his little rap trio LOLOL!!! I told him fine, but the dragon had to have a ring on its finger and he had to put a ring on his dragon's finger...
Mrs. Jack Desh...Mrs. Jetmir Deshiroj...Lilly Deshiroj...they all sound nice, :-)
@~~>~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ We broke up ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~<~~@
All this change is driving me crazy!! Jack dropped out of college to help out at the deli and keep those Black Pantheon slimeballs away. He used to be all about rap and hip-hop; now he's a big punk dude...well, maybe that change isn't so bad. He's been encouraging me to go with the whole goth look and I'm cool with that.
But he's so detached now. Even when we're making love, it feels like he's somewhere else. I can't really blame him. He spends almost every waking hour fighting Vin's gangmembers, either physically or in court. Like the judge has any balls to convict any of those black bastards. His parents are grateful for his efforts, but are considering moving instead of keeping up this pointless fight. I agree with them. I think we should move on...
--
WHY?? Why does it have to be like this?!? I talked to Jack about moving somewhere safe, but he started screaming about Vin this and Vin that. He's totally consumed by this! Ever since his parents got that death threat, he started calling his gang the "Shpatë Dragua" and vowed to take Vin's gang down. I knew he wasn't alright.
I told him his parents don't want any more fighting. I told him if he kept this up he would get killed. I told him it was the gang or me. He said he was sorry......
But it's okay, I have my drugs...hopefully they'll make me forget...
@~~>~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ I made a mistake ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~<~~@
He's been nice to me since...since Jack. He's provided with all the coke I need to forget Jack. Jack's almost a distant memory now. I don't even remember Jack...Vin's been treating me well. I think he has. I really don't feel too much emotion these days. Makes it easy to fuck those high-profile politicians when he needs me to. Not that they last very long. They sure are in a fragile state of mind those few minutes after those few seconds of bliss. Very easy to influence. But it makes me wonder why I keep doing this.
--
Oh my god! I just killed Jack's parents!!! I didn't want to! But Vin made me do it. He forced me to! I told him I wanted to quit this business and move away. But he wouldn't let me. Not until I killed someone. Two someones. It sounds brutal, but I had to get out of this! I thought it would be gang members!! What is wrong with me?!!?
We met at the warehouse downtown. I snorted a few lines and downed a few shots of whiskey to dull my senses beforehand. Vin told me to get in his Escalade and put on the blindfold on the seat. After a few minutes he told me to peel out until I crashed. He told me the airbags would keep me safe. My mind was fucking scrambled, so I went along with it....
As I stumbled out of the car, I took off the blindfold--I saw Jack!! He was kneeling between his parents. He was crying so much. We made eye contact for a moment and he fainted. I did, too, but not before I vomited at the thought of what I had done. The last thing I heard was the sound of Vin's laughter echoing against the walls of the warehouse...
@~~>~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~<~~@
I'm shaking. I'm gonna puke. I'm gonna faint. I can't breathe. I'm dizzy. My heart is pounding. My skin is cold and wet. I can't be in here.
"I...remember now."
"Jack, I'm so sorry!! I really didn't know...I wasn't in a proper state of mind. I haven't been since...since we broke up.
"I know. I know that now." I have to get out of this claustrophobic hole of an apartment. "Lil, I need to go for a walk."
"Me too."
"No, I need to go alone. I need to be by myself for a little bit."
"Umm..."
"What?"
"Well, it's just that I always kept this diary file password-protected. But right after I wrote that last part, I stopped writing and did drugs even more heavily than before...I forgot the password, I forgot Vin--I forgot you. But when you showed up out of nowhere last night, I remembered the password! I was finally able to read this stuff while you were sleeping! My world revolves around you, Jack!"
"Yeah, that's great. I have to go."
I hate making Lil cry, but this isn't about her. I remember why I'm back in town after 2 years.
User Reviews
Submitted by Stagger_Lee (user info) at 2006-03-23 11:29:09 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Nellypaal (user info) at 2005-09-30 06:20:28 (#)
Ranking: 2
I've just read all 8 back-to-back and I've fucking loved it. Now I have to wait. Boo.
It's a shame more people haven't managed to catch it.
----
Indeed. But I get to straight to the next one, oh yeah.
Submitted by Ditka (user info) at 2005-12-27 23:15:57 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by LadyPlural (user info) at 2005-10-03 20:18:05 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Stupid goth kids.
Submitted by Nellypaal (user info) at 2005-09-30 06:20:28 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I've just read all 8 back-to-back and I've fucking loved it. Now I have to wait. Boo.
It's a shame more people haven't managed to catch it.
Submitted by Brdn_Nkd (user info) at 2005-09-29 16:16:37 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
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Submitted by JMG114 (user info) at 2005-09-29 14:47:25 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
It's nice when pieces fall into place, especially in such a good story.
Submitted by kaos-king (user info) at 2005-09-29 14:07:52 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
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Submitted by morontian (user info) at 2005-09-29 12:42:22 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
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