killer whales with dart guns (735 hits)
Category: NoneRating: 1.7 on 11 reviews (Rate this item) (V)
Submitted by Sharps <joesephsharps.at.hotmail.com> (View user info) at 2005-09-30 10:35:08 EDT
Sooner or later, man will learn.
Story #1 "Sea lions sinking ships"
Awww- cute sea lions. Lets make them endangered because this world would suffer without their fat asses. Let's face it-the only reason they exist is to make obese people feel a connection with nature through another fatty animal.
So these nifty endangered species.... think that they are "well behaved" since they've been given a reprieve from the wholesale slaughter man commits on all the other races? Hell no-
In Cali, they are busy sinking ships by swarming them. They hang out and "bark" all night causing over 400 noise complaints. They takeover docks and fight with humans.
Huh- imagine that. A race we've brought to the brink of extinction doesn't like us. But the funny thing is, because they are endangered, they are protected, so no one can do anything about it... absolutely perfect.
From NPR:
http://www.npr.org/templates/story/story.php?storyId=4929124
Story #2 "Trained Killer Whales armed with blow guns on the loose"
I was reading this and couldn't believe it.... but it's from "how stuff works.com"....(with lousy spelling equal to my own)
"It may be the oddest tale to emerge from the aftermath of Hurricane Katrina. Armed dolphins, trained by the US military to shoot terrorists and pinpoint spies underwater, may be missing in the Gulf of Mexico.
Experts who have studied the US navy's cetacean training exercises claim the 36 mammals could be carrying 'toxic dart' guns. Divers and surfers risk attack, they claim, from a species considered to be among the planet's smartest. The US navy admits it has been training dolphins for military purposes, but has refused to confirm that any are missing.
Dolphins have been trained in attack-and-kill missions since the Cold War. The US Atlantic bottlenose dolphins have apparently been taught to shoot terrorists attacking military vessels. Their coastal compound was breached during the storm, sweeping them out to sea. But those who have studied the controversial use of dolphins in the US defence programme claim it is vital they are caught quickly"
From "the guardian" via "howstuffworks.com"
http://observer.guardian.co.uk/international/story/0,6903,1577753,00.html
User Reviews
Submitted by hungovermondays (user info) at 2005-10-08 12:25:06 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
Sea lions
sinking ships.
what fool fed you that line of shit?
Submitted by BadAssJulie (user info) at 2005-10-01 00:24:08 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I have a scar on my arm from a sea lion bite. When I was in middle school we had a boat and there was a baby sea lion that always hung out and slept on the back of the boat. I named her Cesealia and I played with her until one time when I was feeding her, I dropped some food on my arm and she went for it. Bitch. She was cute though.
Submitted by sideshow (user info) at 2005-09-30 16:23:01 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
intense
Submitted by icarus1987 (user info) at 2005-09-30 13:40:19 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
We need to arm more animals.
Submitted by wanderingsharps (user info) at 2005-09-30 13:29:19 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
yeah, stabkill is probably right.
liked berty's comment.
I think it would be a great world if it was really true.
I'd like to believe....
Submitted by Sassmasterr (user info) at 2005-09-30 11:43:03 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
sharks with friggin' laser beams attached to their heads
Submitted by Stabkill (user info) at 2005-09-30 11:42:01 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
That second story I was taken on myself...I should have known if I saw it on "theguardian" but instead I saw it somewhere else.
Basically, the navy helped rescue the dolphins that were washed out of their habitat in the sea world or whatever.... And then people started saying, "We know the navy uses dolphins for military purposes" and it blew up from there. Then you got Austin Powers with the sharks with freakin' laser beams....leading others to believe this is what the dolphins are used for. And since the military helped and checked out the dolphins, they were making sure they weren't their own that were missing.
Well, the truth is (as some people on this site already told me where they are) the dolphins are trained and kept in SAN DIEGO, not New Orleans. Also, there are no dolphins "equipped with dart guns"...the navy people laughed at this notion and have said that their dolpins were never trained in such a manner (they are used to find mines). I did know that if it was real, who would believe a dolphin could trigger a poison dart and that the dolphins would wear poison darts at all times...even when not on missions. That's ridiculous because wouldn't the trainers themselves be in danger of getting shot? Hilarious...that story (like 90% of the others involving hurricane Katrina) were blown out of proportion.
Submitted by kai070169 (user info) at 2005-09-30 11:22:58 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
PROOF that Killer Whales LOVE being in captivity
http://www.ubersite.com/m/37844
Submitted by Berty (user info) at 2005-09-30 11:07:39 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Give Killer Whales special blow guns so they can hunt submerged terrorists? What the fuck? They're not called Killer Whales because they're harmless herbivores. They've got massive, massive teeth. If a Killer Whale wants your ass, that's it. You are smoked whale feed. They don't need a stupid gay dart gun to ruin anyone's shit.
Fucking madness. Next they'll be making glasses for bats.
Submitted by wookie (user info) at 2005-09-30 10:55:11 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
Oh noes!! It's like that episode of the Simpsons, come to life.
Which reminds me of one of my favorite quotes ever:
"Mmmmm, ahhhh...alcohol, and night swimming...it's a winning combination."--Lenny.
Submitted by Jeanneee (user info) at 2005-09-30 10:54:38 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
+2 because I hate sea lions too