FUCK EVERY0NE, THE S0X ARE L0SlNG, l WlLL P0ST TWlCE.... (1081 hits)
Category: HumorLabels: sports
Rating: 0.33 on 19 reviews (Rate this item) (V)
Submitted by Habeeb " GO BEARS WOO!!!" Thomas (View user info) at 2005-10-05 20:23:52 EDT
HERE ARE SOME FUNY JOKES..
What do you call two Mexicans playing basketball?
Juan on Juan
What is a Yankee?
The same as a quickie, but a guy can do it alone.
What is the difference between a Harley and a Hoover?
The position of the dirt bag.
Why is divorce so expensive?
Because it's worth it.
What do you see when the Pillsbury Dough Boy bends over?
Doughnuts.
Why is air a lot like sex?
Because it's no big deal unless you're not getting any.
What do you call a smart blonde?
A golden retriever.
What do attorneys use for birth control?
Their personalities.
What's the difference between a girlfriend and wife?
45 lbs.
What's the difference between a boyfriend and husband?
45 minutes.
What's the fastest way to a man's heart?
Through his chest with a sharp knife.
Why do men want to marry virgins?
They can't stand criticism.
Why is it so hard for women to find men that are sensitive, caring, and good-looking?
Because those men already have boyfriends.
What's the difference between a new husband and a new dog?
After a year, the dog is still excited to see you.
What makes men chase women they have no intention of marrying?
The same urge that makes dogs chase cars they have no intention of driving.
Why don't bunnies make noise when they have sex?
Because they have cotton balls.
What's the difference between a porcupine and BMW?
A porcupine has the pricks on the outside.
What did the blonde say when she found out she was pregnant?
"Are you sure it's mine?"
Why does Mike Tyson cry during sex?
Mace will do that to you.
Why did OJ Simpson want to move to West Virginia ?
Everyone has the same DNA.
Why do men find it difficult to make eye contact?
Breasts don't have eyes.
Did you hear about the dyslexic Rabbi?
He walks around saying "Yo."
Why do drivers' education classes in Redneck schools use the car only on Mondays, Wednesdays and Fridays?
Because on Tuesday and Thursday, the Sex Ed class uses it.
Where does an Irish family go on vacation?
A different bar.
Did you hear about the Chinese couple that had a retarded baby?
They named him "Sum Ting Wong"
What would you call it when an Italian has one arm shorter than the other?
A speech impediment.
What does it mean when the flag at the Post Office is flying at half-mast?
They're hiring.
What's the difference between a southern zoo and a northern zoo?
A southern zoo has a description of the animal on the front of the cage along with.. "a recipe".
How do you get a sweet little 80-year-old lady to say the F word?
Get another sweet little 80-year-old lady to yell *BINGO*!
What's the difference between a northern fairytale and a southern fairytale?
A northern fairytale begins "Once upon a time... - A southern fairytale begins "Y'all ain't gonna believe this shit...
User Reviews
Submitted by Berty (user info) at 2005-10-06 09:32:42 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Oh, Chicago White Sox I see.
Sorry, all you foreigners are the same to me.
Submitted by Berty (user info) at 2005-10-06 09:29:19 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
It's always confused me why Habeeb supports the Boston Red Sox when he lives in Chicago.
Is he some kind of glory hunter?
Submitted by cuberat (user info) at 2005-10-06 09:22:22 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Freddy Garcia+Road Game+Afternoon Game=White Sox Winner Friday.
Submitted by Spuds002 (user info) at 2005-10-06 04:50:14 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
stupid
Submitted by Wallstreet (user info) at 2005-10-05 23:50:42 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
GOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
WHITE SOXXXXXXXXX
I LOVE YOU GOOCH!!!!!!!!!!!!
Submitted by The_Yellow_Dart (user info) at 2005-10-05 23:21:39 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
haha
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2005-10-05 22:24:32 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Twice as shitty.
Submitted by munkeypants (user info) at 2005-10-05 22:15:15 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
FUCK DA WHITE S0X
WANNA GO??
STAB
PUNCH
KICK
TAZE
Submitted by polyamorousaj (user info) at 2005-10-05 21:54:03 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Bobby Jenks did not win the game. He just kept from blowing it.
Barely.
I would've put Hermanson in what with all the lefties in Boston's lineup, but I can't say that Ozzie Guillen doesn't know what he's doing.
GET YOUR BROOMS OUT, BITCHES WOO!!!
GARLAND IS GOING IN GAME THREE PROBABLY AND THAT MEANS SWEEP
Submitted by ChristPuncher (user info) at 2005-10-05 21:46:43 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
FUCK YOU YOU IOWAN INBRED RETARD HE WON WOOOO FUCK WELLS HE IS FAT TOO WOOOOOOOOOOO
GO SOX WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
Submitted by polyamorousaj (user info) at 2005-10-05 21:41:45 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
WOOOOOOOOO SOX WIN!!!!
WHITE SOX WOOOO
FUCK YOU BOBBY JENKS YOU FAT BASTARD GO DO SOME CRUNCHES.
Submitted by CaptainThorns (user info) at 2005-10-05 21:13:47 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
What do you call a Mexican retard?
Habeeb.
http://www.ubersite.com/m/76453
Submitted by Method (user info) at 2005-10-05 21:09:07 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
habeeb: TOO MANY CHICKS FROM HIGH SKOO
habeeb: IT MAKES ME SSAD
method: haha
method: go bang em
habeeb: I DID ALREADY
habeeb: ITS LIKE RERUNS
method: liar
habeeb: NO ITS TRUE
habeeb: WEEPS
habeeb: I PEEKED AT 17
method: such a liar
method: you mean peaked
habeeb: NO I NEVER CLIMBED NO MOUNTAINS
method: youre a birgin?
habeeb: FUCK NO
method: liar
habeeb: MY PEENER SEENED MO ACTIOM THAN A WW2 VETERAN WITH A FUCKING PROBLEM
method: lies all lies
method: the only vagina youve ever seen up close is Urbanes
habeeb: EWWW
habeeb: BLARRF
Submitted by polyamorousaj (user info) at 2005-10-05 20:51:49 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
WOO GO IGUCHI!!!
IGUCHI IGOTCHA BITCHES
Submitted by ChristPuncher (user info) at 2005-10-05 20:51:12 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
shup....
ago sox woo!!!!!
chug chug chug
Submitted by Method (user info) at 2005-10-05 20:49:04 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
haha they dont know you're a girl
I thought you told everyone already?
Submitted by ChristPuncher (user info) at 2005-10-05 20:46:42 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
yo mamma
Submitted by HighFructoseCornSyrup (user info) at 2005-10-05 20:40:32 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
Who the fuck is that?
Submitted by DieKreutzen (user info) at 2005-10-05 20:27:55 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
sum ting wong