Biscuits (391 hits)
Category: HumorRating: 0.38 on 8 reviews (Rate this item) (V)
Submitted by <lossygould.at.hotmail.com> (View user info) at 2005-10-12 05:46:50 EDT
The kind of things that happen to me :
The other day I had to catch a train, I arrived early so I went to the coffee shop, bought a paper, a cup of tea and a packet of rich tea biscuits. I sit down at a table, visualise the scene, me at the table, tea on the right, paper on the left and in the middle, the packet of biscuits. What I haven't told you is that sitting opposite me is a well dressed business man. He didn't look like he was about to do anything weird. Suddenly he leans over, picks up the packet of biscuits, rips it open and takes out a biscuit - and eats it.
There was nothing in my upbringing to tell me what to do if a man calmly opens and takes one of my biscuits. So I did what any other red blooded Englishman would do, I said nothing. Instead I leant over a took a biscuit myself. I ate it, and I ate it deliberately.
He then leaned over and took another biscuit, and ate it, I took one, and it went on like that, him, me, him, me, him, me. Till we had finished the whole packet - it was only 8 biscuits but it felt like a lifetime. When the packet was finished he got up and left.
A few moments later my train was announced so I drunk down my tea, picked up my paper and underneath my paper - My packet of biscuits.
User Reviews
Submitted by malbin (user info) at 2005-10-13 14:06:58 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
This is from The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy series (one of the later books I think).
Submitted by Zoidberg (user info) at 2005-10-12 06:29:39 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Heard it before
Are you the British sideburns?
Submitted by CHR15 (user info) at 2005-10-12 06:14:22 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
Biscuit injustice is a terrible, terrible thing.
Submitted by Berty (user info) at 2005-10-12 06:04:53 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I'd have just put two fingers on the packet as he reached for them and said "steady..."
I'm just a ninja like that.
Submitted by DooZa (user info) at 2005-10-12 05:53:45 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Oh man.. this is so old
But good re telling
Submitted by Fabit (user info) at 2005-10-12 05:51:47 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
haha awesome.
Submitted by Phallic_Cymbals (user info) at 2005-10-12 05:50:45 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
I swear i've heard this before. How many biscuit-corsairs are there!?
Submitted by Sphagnum (user info) at 2005-10-12 05:48:35 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
For some reason this really made me laugh.