The Heart that bleeds every night from the pain of fallen leaves in November with the blood red stains on the tile floor from your whorish Mom's slutty vagina that houses a billion disease ridden rats that eat at my heart everyday of my miserable life as (1152 hits)
Category: Humor -> Dirty HumorRating: -0.69 on 14 reviews (Rate this item) (V)
Submitted by Erik Kuhn <gokukuhnerik.at.yahoo.com> (View user info) at 2005-10-21 22:01:21 EDT
October 19, 2005
TITLE: The Heart that bleeds every night from the pain of falling leaves in November with the blood red stains on the tile floor from your whorish Mom's slutty vagina that houses a billion disease ridden rats that eat at my heart everyday of my miserable life as I toil away on 40 math problems from my gay math teacher that doesn't understand the pain I go through.
Dear Blog,
Today I woke up at 7 and felt like I was dead. My arms and legs were limp. My breathing sounded like thunder in my ears. My mother called me but it sounded like she was a mile away. I felt so alone.
After calling me ten more times, my mother came into my room and dragged me out of bed. I hit the floor with a loud thump. I was enraged beyond belief. I reached for my sword on my wall, unsheathed it, and before she could move, I lodged it into her chest. She screamed out with pain as I repeatedly stabbed her. I left her pinned to the floor by the sword after one last big thrust. Blood sprayed everywhere, on the walls, on me. Usually I would have been grossed out at this, but it strangely calmed me.
After a few minutes of screaming, my mother ceased to move. She just lay there motionless. I sat on my bed, contemplating on what I should do next. This ghastly act will ruin my whole life and affect my relatives, but I think it was worth it.
Since I was already fucked, I decided to go out and destroy all of my most hated enemies.
My first victim was Vincent Gerracho. I arrived at his house at around 8. I carried with me some Chloroform to render him unconscious and a rope with which to tie him up so I can then torture him, and acid to melt his parents. I also carried my fathers 8inch blade hunting knife he he didn't want to cooperate. I snuck in through his back door. His mother was cooking in the kitchen and his father was watching TV. I put chloroform on a towel and put it over his mothers mouth to knock her out. I then dragged her body into the backyard and stuffed it into a trashbin. I dumped a bunch of acid on her and her flesh started to melt off. I then proceeded to do the same to the father.
Vincent was in his bathroom taking a dump. He made it so easy for me to trap him. I burst into the bathroom with my knife out. He jumped off the toilet in fear and shit flew out of his ass. He fell to the floor and I pounced on him and knocked him out with the chloroform and then tied him to the toilet. I hadn't eaten anything all that day and his shit looked mighty tasty, so I decided to eat some. It was the best shit I had eaten in my whole life. After about 15 minutes, he started to wake. As he realized what had happened, he tried to scream through the cloth over his mouth. He recognized me and realized that his time was over.
I always thought he was attractive because I'm gay, but he always showed hatred towards me. I finally had the chance to fulfill my fantasies.
I whipped out my horse-like dick. It was like sandpaper, and smegma covered every inch. I lightly rubbed it against his face, tickling his nose which made him giggle. I scooped up some smegma with my finger and rubbed it across his lips. I slit his wrist and his bright red blood flowed out. This almost caused me to unleash my whole load of semen which I had been saving up since July. I continued rubbing my dick around in circles across his face for about 4 minutes.
I then cut open his belly and all his intestines flowed out. I removed his intestine and used it as a straw to drink his piss out of the toilet. Then I stretched the end of the intestine over my dick and pissed into it. It came out the other end with such force that it created a shower. A Golden Shower that is.
After bathing in my golden shower, I proceeded to rip open his stomach and rub my dick around the inside. His stomach acid burned my penis, but it hurt soooo good.
Finally, after I satisfied my sexual needs, I took a shit in his belly. I started to head out the door, but I remembered I hadn't taken a shit on his melted parents. So I went and did the deed. I always take shits on my victims, it is a tradition of my family, started by my great great grandfather, Adolf Hitler.
TO BE CONTINUED TOMORROW!!!!
User Reviews
Submitted by CrazyHorse (user info) at 2006-07-07 20:48:51 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
So...uh.....do ya like puppies?
Huh fella??
I bet you do!!
Submitted by HHH (user info) at 2006-07-07 20:33:24 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
First post I ever read.
Submitted by shitfuck (user info) at 2005-10-22 15:17:12 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
That's some fucked up shit.
Submitted by missedthepoint (user info) at 2005-10-22 15:09:31 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
give me back the 3 minutes i wasted reading this
Submitted by skrapmetal (user info) at 2005-10-22 12:31:19 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Totally -2bular.
Submitted by jeveuxgagner (user info) at 2005-10-22 02:53:13 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Dear Blog,
NO
Submitted by The_Cyst_Master (user info) at 2005-10-22 02:04:05 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Baaaaaaaaaaaahahhhhhhhahhhhhh. You said blog....-2
Plus, no porn!
In addition, too many words and not enough ass and titties.
Submitted by Feijuada (user info) at 2005-10-22 01:38:30 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
I hate how stupid assholes bitch about being worthless but don't have the guts to off themselves and at least end their lives like men.
Submitted by Chinaski (user info) at 2005-10-22 00:19:42 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Homer: I suppose you want to probe me. Well, you might as well get
it over with.
Kang: Stop! We have reached the limits of what rectal probing can
teach us.
Treehouse of Horror VII
Submitted by Orgasmatron (user info) at 2005-10-22 00:16:12 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
We call ourselves...The Aristocrats!
Submitted by pen_name (user info) at 2005-10-21 23:19:20 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
+1 for "Dear blog"
Submitted by Viciousriffs (user info) at 2005-10-21 22:54:26 EDT (#)
Ranking: -1
Um.....
What?
Submitted by erinly (user info) at 2005-10-21 22:22:40 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
No Comment
Submitted by forthewin (user info) at 2005-10-21 22:17:33 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
HAHAHA WTF IS THIS SHIT
I'll give you a +2 if you NEVER POST ANYTHING LIKE THIS EVER AGAIN