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My Mother Taught Me... (432 hits)

Category: None

Rating: -2 on 1 review (Rate this item) (V)
Labels:

Submitted by Lauren123 (View user info) at 2005-11-01 03:06:24 EST


1. My Mother taught me about ANTICIPATION...
"Just wait until your father get's home."

2. My Mother taught me about RECEIVING...
"You're going to get it when we get home."

3. My Mother taught me to MEET A CHALLENGE...
"What were you thinking? Answer me when I'm talking to you! Don't talk back to me!"

4. My Mother taught me LOGIC...
"If you fall out of that swing and break your neck, you're not going to the store with me."

5. My Mother taught me MEDICAL SCIENCE...
"If you don't stop crossing your eyes, they are going to freze that way."

6. My Mother taught me to THINK AHEAD...
"If you don't pass your spelling test, you'll never get a job."

7. My Mother taught me ESP...
"Put your jacket on; don't you think I know when you're cold?"

8. My Mother taught me HUMOUR...
"When the lawn mower cuts off your toes, don't come running to me."

9. My Mother taught me how to BECOME AN ADULT...
"If you don't eat your vegetables, you'll never grow up."

10. My Mother taught me about SEX...
"How do you think you got here?"

11. My Mother taught me about GENETICS...
"You're just like your father."

12. My Mother taught me about my ROOTS...
"Do you think you were born in a barn?"

13. My Mother taught me about WISDOM OF AGE...
"When you get to be my age, you'll understand."

14. And my all time favourite...JUSTICE...
"One day you'll have kids, and I hope they turn out just like you...The you'll see what it's like."




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User Reviews


Submitted by JonnyX (user info) at 2005-11-01 16:31:01 EST (#)
Ranking: -2

*fart*


Marge, please, old people don't need companionship. They need to be
isolated and studied, so it can be determined what nutrients they have
that might be extracted for our personal use.

-- Homer Simpson
Lady Bouvier's Lover