Shenanigan Pie (The Day the Uber Died) (4113 hits)
Category: Quotes & Stories -> PoetryLabels: songs
Rating: 1.85 on 191 reviews (Rate this item) (V)
Submitted by Orgasmatron (View user info) at 2005-11-02 13:07:55 EST
A long, long time ago...I can still remember how that Uber used to make me smile.
And I knew if I wrote my posts
That I could make them laugh the most
And maybe they'd be happy for a while.
But late December made me shiver
With every link I clicked, I'd quiver -
Bad news bold in headlines,
Portents, omens, bad signs.
I can't remember if I cried when I
Read about the site's demise,
But something touched me deep inside
The day that Uber died.
So bye, bye Miss Shenanigan Pie,
Drove my K-car to the gay bar and found comicbookguy,
The MVA were drinkin' whiskey and rye
Singin' "This is my last 'minus two, die!'
This is my last 'minus, two, die!'"
Did you write a heated post?
And have you read something by Jewtoast?
Have you seen Tubgirl's wretched flow?
And do you believe Fat Tony's bull?
Can Uber save your mortal soul?
And can you teach me Photoshop real slow?
Well I knew that you liked menz most ghey
When Kaelic blew a kiss your way -
You rubbed each others' necks,
Y halo thar, buttsecks.
I was a lonely mid-aged office lout
With useless facts and a J-Date account,
But I was fucked, I had no doubt,
The day the Uber died.
I started singin'...
Bye, bye Miss Shenanigan Pie,
Drove my K-car to the gay bar and found comicbookguy,
The MVA were drinkin' whiskey and rye
Singin' "This is my last 'minus two, die!'
This is my last 'minus two, die!'"
Now for six years we've been on our own
With no one left to shout 'Shamone!'
But that's not how it used to be.
When Will Zone marched out to the sea
Hidden on the back of a swamp donkey
And Apollo bounced the sun high 'pon his knee.
With Big Mike stumbling, in his cups,
Shots of Urbane's snatch, they went up,
The bum's ass, it was licked,
MS Paint posts were clicked.
And while loki read a book on Thor
And Lojope started to hitwhore
Shit Post Thursday left us sore
The day the Uber died.
We were singin'
Bye, bye Miss Shenanigan Pie,
Drove my K-car to the gay bar and found comicbookguy,
The MVA were drinkin' whiskey and rye
Singin' "This is my last 'minus two, die!'
This is my last 'minus two, die!'"
Rapefest, bare breasts, on the front page burning,
The noobs popped up like a plunger, churning
Content-free posts out the ass
They served baked goods, like a cookie lass,
The alters grew, made a march en masse,
While Zoidberg stroked his sideburns, eating bass.
"If I cum now, will it be too soon?"
Was the bass line to the users' tune,
We all got up to rate
Oh, but we all got up too late.
'Cause the alters flooded up the page,
Their shitty posts drew Method's rage,
Did you see Rad cry in his cage
The day the Uber died?
We started singing
Bye, bye Miss Shenanigan Pie,
Drove my K-car to the gay bar and found comicbookguy,
The MVA were drinkin' whiskey and rye
Singin' "This is my last 'minus two, die!'
This is my last 'minus two, die!'"
In there we were all safe to lurk
A generation bored at work
With no hope for promotions then,
So come on, Jack McCallum, juke this joint,
Jack wrote stories with a point
'Cause Goatse is the devil's only friend.
And as I read my new replies,
The anger built up deep inside,
No writer born in hell
Could break that Shlongy's spell.
And as the flame war burned all through the night,
With bullshit taunts thrown left and right,
I saw Shlongly laughing with delight
The day the Uber died.
He started singing
Bye, bye Miss Shenanigan Pie,
Drove my K-car to the gay bar and found comicbookguy,
The MVA were drinkin' whiskey and rye
Singin' "This is my last 'minus two, die!'
This is my last 'minus two, die!'"
I met a girl who sang the blues,
I asked if I could see her boobs,
She took me to her Cabaret.
I Googled 'Cilfone' once again,
The way I had when this began,
But the engine said the query went astray.
And on the 'net the writers screamed,
The emus cried and the rabbits dreamed,
But not a word was posted,
The uploads weren't hosted.
And the most viewed men, they numbered three:
Razor, Bart and JMG.
They walked through the far-strewn debris
The day the Uber died.
They were singin'
Bye, bye Miss Shenanigan Pie,
Drove my K-car to the gay bar and found comicbookguy,
The MVA were drinkin' whiskey and rye
Singin' "This is my last 'minus two, die!'
This is my last 'minus two, die!'"
We were singin'
Bye, bye Miss Shenanigan Pie,
Drove my K-car to the gay bar and found comicbookguy,
The MVA were drinkin' whiskey and rye
Singin' "This is my last 'minus two, die!'
This is my last 'minus two, die!'"
User Reviews
Submitted by Unabonger (user info) at 2007-11-04 15:38:34 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
this is such a great post.
Submitted by MyNameIsTim (user info) at 2007-11-04 15:11:38 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by darko (user info) at 2006-06-20 02:24:18 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by Sacrilicious (user info) at 2006-02-13 08:50:32 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
EVER.
Submitted by Xcuses (user info) at 2006-01-08 11:14:57 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
classic
Submitted by Orgasmatron (user info) at 2006-01-08 11:09:35 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by paulblakeford (user info) at 2006-01-03 18:21:49 (#)
Ranking: -1
Cut it in half. Take out the strong stanzas and use them.
---
It's a parody of a song.
I can't exactly cut anything out.
Submitted by Ditka (user info) at 2006-01-08 00:04:20 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
ohhhh this was YOU! ha
Submitted by CaptainThorns (user info) at 2006-01-05 13:24:07 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
THIS SHALL NEVER DIE!
Submitted by MistressFist (user info) at 2006-01-04 12:27:40 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
:-)
Submitted by TigerLilly (user info) at 2006-01-04 12:15:54 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Love these
Submitted by paulblakeford (user info) at 2006-01-03 18:21:49 EST (#)
Ranking: -1
Cut it in half. Take out the strong stanzas and use them.
Submitted by Crystle (user info) at 2005-11-30 23:22:07 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Sigh.
another song I didn't make.
Submitted by shandythedog (user info) at 2005-11-30 16:17:49 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
so you are the lyricist.
jolly good show
Submitted by Professional_Peon (user info) at 2005-11-29 16:52:54 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
YEAH! I've been included!
*feels loved*
Submitted by CaptainThorns (user info) at 2005-11-29 13:31:32 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
And another one for good measure.
Submitted by CaptainThorns (user info) at 2005-11-29 13:31:16 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Spam (user info) at 2005-11-29 12:08:39 (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by HadToBeDone (user info) at 2005-11-29 10:41:51 (#)
Ranking: 2
Can't let the Cap'n have al lthe love.
--------------------------------------
You're damn straight I can't have all the love. The O-Man invented the genius lyrics!
Submitted by Orgasmatron (user info) at 2005-11-29 13:18:22 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
PP:
Swap:
Well I knew that you liked menz most ghey
When Kaelic blew a kiss your way -
You rubbed each others' necks,
Y halo thar, buttsecks.
For:
Well I knew that Average Dan was bald
When I saw him hatless at the mall,
Pro. Peon buffed his dome
And it shined like platinum and chrome
Submitted by lucid (user info) at 2005-11-29 13:07:57 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Classic
Submitted by Professional_Peon (user info) at 2005-11-29 12:22:19 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Who am I you ask?
Mind your business
Submitted by Professional_Peon (user info) at 2005-11-29 12:21:32 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
I DEMAND THIS BE REDONE TO INCLUDE ME!!!
IMMEDIATELY!!
Submitted by Spam (user info) at 2005-11-29 12:08:39 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by HadToBeDone (user info) at 2005-11-29 10:41:51 (#)
Ranking: 2
Can't let the Cap'n have al lthe love.
Submitted by Orgasmatron (user info) at 2005-11-29 11:25:43 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Love me.
Feel me.
Know me.
Just not in the Biblical way.
Submitted by HadToBeDone (user info) at 2005-11-29 10:41:51 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Can't let the Cap'n have al lthe love.
Submitted by MyOwnLittleWorld (user info) at 2005-11-28 12:56:41 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by Razor (user info) at 2005-11-28 12:00:27 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by Orgasmatron (user info) at 2005-11-28 10:01:28 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Go enjoy the recording, monkeys!
http://www.ubersite.com/m/79919
Submitted by CaptainThorns (user info) at 2005-11-28 08:15:22 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
It's done! ---> http://www.ubersite.com/m/79919
Submitted by Orgasmatron (user info) at 2005-11-20 18:05:01 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Woo!
Submitted by CaptainThorns (user info) at 2005-11-18 10:41:57 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Hey 'O' - you will be happy to know that recording is underway for your little song here. :)
Submitted by pen_name (user info) at 2005-11-15 08:56:22 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by stevie_says (user info) at 2005-11-13 22:32:33 (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by pen_name (user info) at 2005-11-13 20:57:25 (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by stevie_says (user info) at 2005-11-13 20:54:23 (#)
Ranking: 2
This post means so much more now that Uber is collapsing onto itself in a time and anti-time convergence. We have to fly the ship into the anomaly and create a static warp shell. That will repair the rupture.
...but all good things must come to an end...
SAVE US PICARD SAVE US!
______________________
fuckin' geeks. you know what really pisses me off, though...we'd need like three ships going in three different time periods. I don't think we have enough cilfones to pull it off.
--
Who says that's not what Bart is doing right now? He's in the past right now. Then he's in the future. He needs to shift back to the present before we can get the site back.
Fool.
...this episode was on the other day. Normally, the concept of a static warp shell wouldn't be anywhere near my mind.
____________
the question remains...who's playing q?
my money is on electro
Submitted by bush_for_god (user info) at 2005-11-14 15:59:29 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by Flack (user info) at 2005-11-14 14:30:58 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
fuck i liked it
Submitted by stevie_says (user info) at 2005-11-13 22:32:33 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by pen_name (user info) at 2005-11-13 20:57:25 (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by stevie_says (user info) at 2005-11-13 20:54:23 (#)
Ranking: 2
This post means so much more now that Uber is collapsing onto itself in a time and anti-time convergence. We have to fly the ship into the anomaly and create a static warp shell. That will repair the rupture.
...but all good things must come to an end...
SAVE US PICARD SAVE US!
______________________
fuckin' geeks. you know what really pisses me off, though...we'd need like three ships going in three different time periods. I don't think we have enough cilfones to pull it off.
--
Who says that's not what Bart is doing right now? He's in the past right now. Then he's in the future. He needs to shift back to the present before we can get the site back.
Fool.
...this episode was on the other day. Normally, the concept of a static warp shell wouldn't be anywhere near my mind.
Submitted by Orgasmatron (user info) at 2005-11-13 22:13:02 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
*sigh*
Submitted by pen_name (user info) at 2005-11-13 20:57:25 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by stevie_says (user info) at 2005-11-13 20:54:23 (#)
Ranking: 2
This post means so much more now that Uber is collapsing onto itself in a time and anti-time convergence. We have to fly the ship into the anomaly and create a static warp shell. That will repair the rupture.
...but all good things must come to an end...
SAVE US PICARD SAVE US!
______________________
fuckin' geeks. you know what really pisses me off, though...we'd need like three ships going in three different time periods. I don't think we have enough cilfones to pull it off.
Submitted by stevie_says (user info) at 2005-11-13 20:54:23 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
This post means so much more now that Uber is collapsing onto itself in a time and anti-time convergence. We have to fly the ship into the anomaly and create a static warp shell. That will repair the rupture.
...but all good things must come to an end...
SAVE US PICARD SAVE US!
Submitted by Maddog (user info) at 2005-11-13 20:41:44 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Gratuitous linkwhore. http://www.ubersite.com/m/78475
Submitted by Average_Dan (user info) at 2005-11-11 13:37:23 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
@ what?
Submitted by Orgasmatron (user info) at 2005-11-11 12:38:20 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Ha. No.
But I wish I'd thought of that.
Just orgasmatron2029...
Submitted by Average_Dan (user info) at 2005-11-11 12:24:08 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Was it under the name Whynot Jackmeoff with addy bigpignuts.at.yahoo.com?\
penosface!
Submitted by Orgasmatron (user info) at 2005-11-11 12:08:26 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Huh? I only sent one.
Submitted by Average_Dan (user info) at 2005-11-11 11:54:41 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
I meant with the emails
Submitted by Orgasmatron (user info) at 2005-11-11 11:50:30 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
I can't help it.
No Uber + no work + caffeine rush from Starbucks = Yatta.
Submitted by Average_Dan (user info) at 2005-11-11 11:22:54 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
You dick.
Stop being so weird!
Submitted by Orgasmatron (user info) at 2005-11-11 11:15:06 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Ok, I wasn't really serious when I was forecasting the end of Uber.
But at least now we have something to sing while Rome burns.
Submitted by Orgasmatron (user info) at 2005-11-07 19:39:17 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
This thing is falling faster than my ex-wife to her knees at the behest of a man with money to burn.
Thanks to everyone for making this my first most heated post, first 1000+ hits, first 100+ reviews, etc.
Submitted by Orgasmatron (user info) at 2005-11-07 16:30:56 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Anyone make any progress on creating a recording of this?
Submitted by youarsoghey (user info) at 2005-11-06 17:09:04 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Ah, damn. I got no love in this, but it's still worthy of a massive +2.
Submitted by Davros (user info) at 2005-11-06 14:47:19 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Pretty sure I already said this, but this is all kinds of awesome.
-Dave
Submitted by kai070169 (user info) at 2005-11-05 23:29:26 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Yup.
Submitted by Spooner (user info) at 2005-11-05 22:46:56 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Orgasmatron (user info) at 2005-11-05 13:07:20 (#)
Ranking: 0
Whip - Definitely taken from the Motorhead album. I figured "Orgasmatron" or "Dogs" were the two most nonsensical names I could take from their catalogue.
Spooner - Here you go...just sub out
And while loki read a book on Thor
And Lojope started to hitwhore
Shit Post Thursday left us sore
The day the Uber died.
For
And while Spooner read a book on Bart
Fat Tony did drugs in the dark
We saw Gibb'rish jump the shark
The day the Uber died.
Problem solved.
thecaes - I think there's something deliciously wrong with everyone's brain here.
---
Haha, I appreciate the attention, but really it's not that big of a deal. I don't mind being underground MVA.
Submitted by Sacrilicious (user info) at 2005-11-05 22:22:48 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Your lyrical genius makes me giggle uncontrollably and fills my heart with glee.
Submitted by Sassmasterr (user info) at 2005-11-05 21:39:04 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Folid Gucking Sold
Submitted by Stin (user info) at 2005-11-05 21:27:29 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Unlimited shades of awesomeness.
Submitted by Adware_Inc (user info) at 2005-11-05 15:59:20 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
+2! It didn't used to be this way.
Submitted by firefly (user info) at 2005-11-05 13:21:00 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by Orgasmatron (user info) at 2005-11-05 13:07:20 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Whip - Definitely taken from the Motorhead album. I figured "Orgasmatron" or "Dogs" were the two most nonsensical names I could take from their catalogue.
Spooner - Here you go...just sub out
And while loki read a book on Thor
And Lojope started to hitwhore
Shit Post Thursday left us sore
The day the Uber died.
For
And while Spooner read a book on Bart
Fat Tony did drugs in the dark
We saw Gibb'rish jump the shark
The day the Uber died.
Problem solved.
thecaes - I think there's something deliciously wrong with everyone's brain here.
Submitted by Spooner (user info) at 2005-11-05 02:09:36 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Is it wrong that I feel bad for always being left out of stuff like this?
Probably.
Rather awesome.
Submitted by Whiplash (user info) at 2005-11-04 23:45:33 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
You kick ass Orgasmatron.
(you get your name from the Motorhead album or is that just a happy coincidence?)
Submitted by thecaes (user info) at 2005-11-04 22:55:05 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Okay, this was RIDICULOUSLY AWESOME.
There's something wonderfully wrong with your brain. Your co-grUeberlord is in quiet, humble awe.
Submitted by Call911 (user info) at 2005-11-04 22:47:43 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
amazing... goes together so well
Submitted by BananaPhone (user info) at 2005-11-04 18:19:38 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
*tear*
Submitted by Orgasmatron (user info) at 2005-11-04 15:42:14 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Look at everyone coming together. It's like Live Aid without the weeping, famine-struck Africans.
Pie makes everything better, damnit!
Submitted by bob (user info) at 2005-11-04 15:27:13 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
good shit
Submitted by Girlwithaclue (user info) at 2005-11-04 13:31:14 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
This was solid sweetness!!
Submitted by Loren1 (user info) at 2005-11-04 13:29:56 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Very clever.
Submitted by Anansie (user info) at 2005-11-04 12:27:52 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by CookieLass (user info) at 2005-11-03 18:59:36 (#)
Ranking: 2
O-matron is the Uber poet laureate
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Damn straight.
Submitted by Confuzitron (user info) at 2005-11-04 10:54:25 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
This is still one of my favorite posts of all time.
Submitted by Orgasmatron (user info) at 2005-11-04 10:12:31 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Sing, my pretties...sing for me.
Submitted by Off_The_Wagon (user info) at 2005-11-04 10:08:33 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Solid.
Submitted by ThatOneGirl (user info) at 2005-11-04 09:59:33 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by BuckeyesTHEGAME (user info) at 2005-11-04 09:52:28 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
This is awesome.
Submitted by FartSmeller (user info) at 2005-11-04 08:45:40 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by ozzy (user info) at 2005-11-04 06:52:21 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
AHAHAHAHA!!
Submitted by Hookerboots (user info) at 2005-11-04 05:26:49 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Fanfuckingtastic.
Submitted by Wisher (user info) at 2005-11-04 05:15:53 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
I wish I got all the references, you have incredible talent.
Submitted by Spam (user info) at 2005-11-04 05:03:58 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by electrictoothsyndrome (user info) at 2005-11-02 14:41:11 (#)
Ranking: 2
You rubbed each others' necks,
Y halo thar, buttsecks.
-----------------
BWAAAAAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH!!!!!
Holy Jesus, that's funny!
I can hear it in my head.
Submitted by Ducky (user info) at 2005-11-04 04:11:37 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by nitty34 (user info) at 2005-11-02 13:11:37 (#)
Ranking: 2
Out.
Fucking.
Standing.
Submitted by Saxon (user info) at 2005-11-04 00:39:22 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
<stand> <applauds>
Submitted by Orgasmatron (user info) at 2005-11-03 23:03:47 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Um...apparently there's a video link on the Uberboard being hailed as the 'Shenanigan Pie' video. Don't click on it, as it's got something to do with cat torture.
Thanks to Unabonger for pointing this out.
Submitted by Siren (user info) at 2005-11-03 20:13:48 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Yay! Very good... I'm much impressed.
Submitted by CookieLass (user info) at 2005-11-03 18:59:36 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
O-matron is the Uber poet laureate
Submitted by sublime (user info) at 2005-11-03 16:08:15 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
pfffff
Submitted by SullyThePirate (user info) at 2005-11-03 15:43:19 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by Anansie (user info) at 2005-11-03 15:10:15 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by Average_Dan (user info) at 2005-11-03 15:08:31 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
No, no, you see, its "pwn'd" orgasmatron. Geez!
Submitted by Orgasmatron (user info) at 2005-11-03 14:48:23 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
loki - I wish I could say "I poked around on this for days, readying it for consumption."
But...not so much.
I'm just a freak, apparently.
Submitted by Foonbo (user info) at 2005-11-03 14:47:15 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
I love shit like this. Bravo.
Submitted by loki (user info) at 2005-11-03 14:25:41 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
this took way too much effort
Submitted by Orgasmatron (user info) at 2005-11-03 14:05:09 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
I just got served a steaming dish of 'owned.' Thanks, Dan.
Submitted by Average_Dan (user info) at 2005-11-03 13:54:46 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Orgasmatron (user info) at 2005-11-03 11:07:17 (#)
Ranking: 0
Oh, and Dan -- my user ID's 19732.
Repsect your elders, or I'll learn you good.
Feel free to jiggle my nonce whenever you feel like apologizing...
--------------------------------------------\\
Oh, sorry, I need to get my facts straight. On a side note, I have like 10,000 more hits than you do!
HAHAH!
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2005-11-03 13:54:19 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Oh...and lest we forget.
Sung to the tune of "The Devil Went Down to Georgia" - Charlie Daniels Band
The devil surfed over to Uber
he was looking for a soul to steal
he was in a bind cause he was way behind
he was willing to make a deal
he came across this young man
insulting the authors and making them hot
the devil opened up an IM and said "Boy let me tell you what."
I guess you didn't know this but I'm an uber user too
and if you care to take a dare, I'll make a bet with you
Now you can really slam insults boy, but give the devil his due
I bet a pussy of gold against you soul to think I meaner then you
The boy said "My names schlongy and I don't give a fuck
I'll take that bet, you're gonna regret, you'll gonna need some luck"
REFRAIN
Scholongy sharpen up your wit and slap them authors hard
cause hells broke loose on Uber and the devil deals the cards
If you win you get this golden sex toy made of gold
but if you lose, the devil gets your soul
**badass solo!**
The devil opened up the page and said "Who deserves it most?"
and fire flew from his nostril as he clicked on lojope's post
he read the words, luaghed to himself, and gave an evil hiss
he clicked on "rate this item" and typed away and it looked something like this
"-2 DIE"
"HAR HAR RAPE"
"Attention GHEY menz"
"You suck!!!!oneone"
"Suck my dick, ho!"
the devil finished, schlongy said "You only gave -1?"
Well sit down in that chair right there and watch me have some fun!
REFRAIN2
koolmang is a dick in the highest way
he says he's straight but I know he's gay
jabba's half-limericks just fucking blow
at least I'm not a pussy and rate as 'Random Joe'
**badass solo2!**
the devil bowed his head because he knew that he was wrong
and he laid that golden pussy on the ground before the Schlong
Schlongy crammed the toy in the devils crotch and said "OMG, what a wussy!"
And to this day all Ubersite tells how Fetish got a pussy!
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2005-11-03 13:53:09 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Rock & Roll, dude. Or Ms. Whomever.
Another choice cut for you.
1)Submitted by Fabish (user info) at 2004-11-24 23:44:14 (#)
Ranking: 0
All this energy calling me
Back where it comes from
It's such a crude attitude
It's back where it belongs
All the little kids growing up on the skids are goin'
Shlongy sucks, Shlongy sucks
Jumpin' gene genies, moody james deanies goin'
Shlongy sucks, Shlongy sucks, Shlongy sucks, Shlongy sucks
Shlongy sucks, Shlongy sucks, Shlongy sucks, Shlongy sucks
Mama knows but she don't care
She's got her worries too
Seven kids and a phony affair
And the rent is due
All the little chicks with the crimson lips go
Shlongy sucks, Shlongy sucks
She's livin'in sin with a safety pin
She's goin' Shlongy sucks, Shlongy sucks, Shlongy sucks, Shlongy sucks
Shlongy sucks, Shlongy sucks, Shlongy sucks, Shlongy sucks
I got some records from world war two
I'll play 'em just like me grand dad do
He was a rocker and I am too
Oh Shlongy sucks, yeah Shlongy sucks
So find a place
Grab a space
And yell and scream for more
Shlongy sucks, Shlongy sucks, Shlongy sucks, Shlongy sucks
Shlongy sucks, Shlongy sucks, Shlongy sucks, Shlongy sucks
Shlongy sucks, Shlongy sucks, Shlongy sucks, Shlongy sucks
Shlongy sucks, Shlongy sucks, Shlongy sucks, Shlongy sucks
Shlongy sucks, Shlongy sucks, Shlongy sucks, Shlongy sucks
Shlongy sucks, Shlongy sucks, Shlongy sucks, Shlongy sucks
Three! four!
Three! four!
Three! four!
Sh-ohio-longy!
Submitted by calbearspolo (user info) at 2005-11-03 13:39:00 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
HOLY. POOPING. HELL. Shamone!
Submitted by BLITZKREIG_BOB (user info) at 2005-11-03 12:59:22 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
You need to get ETS to record this for you.
Submitted by DeathJester (user info) at 2005-11-03 11:41:32 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
This is more awesome than a hidden camwhore, a gibberish MS Paint masterpiece, and a J-Date all rolled into one.
Submitted by fell-8-me (user info) at 2005-11-03 10:39:35 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Wow.
Submitted by Average_Dan (user info) at 2005-11-03 10:22:41 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Email it to someone that isn't on this site and let me know what they say about is Omatron.
I'm curious as well...,but my guess is that they would just sit there with a blank expression
on their face and wish for the last few minutes of their life back.
That's just my prediction of course.
Submitted by Average_Dan (user info) at 2005-11-03 10:22:34 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Email it to someone that isn't on this site and let me know what they say about is Omatron.
I'm curious as well...,but my guess is that they would just sit there with a blank expression
on their face and wish for the last few minutes of their life back.
That's just my predictiong of course.
Submitted by Orgasmatron (user info) at 2005-11-03 10:13:19 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
I would *love* to hear what the general public would have to say about this if they stumbled upon it through bored at work or some other dastardly means. The interpretations would be...well, they'd be something.
I want to see someone who has had no exposure to this site analyze this thing, verse by verse, and see what sort of sense they can make of it.
Submitted by Dead_0hi0_Sky (user info) at 2005-11-03 09:48:54 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
pure poetry.
excellent.
Submitted by Average_Dan (user info) at 2005-11-03 09:46:58 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Ryu,
While this is indeed worthy of B@W, beyond the shadow of a doubt, Bart wouldn't let it on there
because there are too many Ubersite references, and the general public would read it and say,
"WTF?"
Not what the fuck, just W-T-F and then say 'Question Mark', and that wouldn't be good for anyone.
Submitted by RyuFu (user info) at 2005-11-03 09:40:16 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Okay.
If THIS isn't a B@W post, I have no effing clue what is.
Submitted by Average_Dan (user info) at 2005-11-03 09:16:41 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
l JUST GOT A BONER.
Submitted by Orgasmatron (user info) at 2005-11-03 09:01:16 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Besides, I've only been here for about six months. I'm still a pig fetus in the big scheme of things.
Submitted by Orgasmatron (user info) at 2005-11-03 08:58:21 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
aardvark -- keep in mind, this is about the chaotic end to Uber, which, like the Star Wars movies, happened a while ago.
So, you're not 'a noob that's ruining Uber.' Besides, all I said was that noobs pop up with content-free posts. Which, you must admit, most new users tend to do the first or second time they post something here.
Now, if you're an alter...
...but then, who isn't these days?
Submitted by hcp28 (user info) at 2005-11-03 08:40:42 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
I am humbled by your awesomeness.
Submitted by b0bbieb0b (user info) at 2005-11-03 08:31:58 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Praise is redundant. I am in awe.
Submitted by a_reader (user info) at 2005-11-03 07:56:30 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
While the quality of this post is certainly deserving of B@W, I think there are far too many Uber-exclusing references for Bart to put it there.
That being said, I still think it belongs there, fuckers don't know what we're talking about can up and get the fuck out.
Submitted by Flying_buttmonkey (user info) at 2005-11-03 07:38:43 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
All
Kinds
Of awesome
Submitted by sinna (user info) at 2005-11-03 07:23:34 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Spot on.
Submitted by crazyaardvark (user info) at 2005-11-03 03:57:38 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
As a noob that is ruining Uber, I probably shouldn't give you a +2
But you deserve it. This is good shit.
Submitted by FilthyAssistant (user info) at 2005-11-03 03:46:20 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Heheheh. Superb.
Submitted by mrwolf (user info) at 2005-11-03 03:43:03 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
What? No Mr. Wolf?
And I thought I was a celebrity.
Pah!
Submitted by Orgasmatron (user info) at 2005-11-03 00:49:42 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Thanks for playing.
Submitted by malbin (user info) at 2005-11-03 00:29:27 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
Ghey.
Submitted by Orgasmatron (user info) at 2005-11-03 00:19:47 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Poetry CAN work on Ubersite...
As long as it's mine.
SUCK MY CO-GRUEBERLORD DANGLE, VERSE HATERS!
I just got back from the Nine Inch Nails concert. GREAT stuff.
Now I'm all wired.
Submitted by LadyPlural (user info) at 2005-11-03 00:18:51 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by knucklesnelson (user info) at 2005-11-02 23:09:13 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by EmptyRobot (user info) at 2005-11-02 22:42:17 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by pen_name (user info) at 2005-11-02 22:12:49 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
liss-end
Submitted by pen_name (user info) at 2005-11-02 22:12:24 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
listen to mclean to help with the pace and it was awesome.
B@U
Submitted by Bigmike (user info) at 2005-11-02 22:10:34 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Actually done nicely.
Submitted by Bubba2341 (user info) at 2005-11-02 21:11:00 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
The puke who said poetry doesn't work on Uber can kiss my ass.
Monkeypants rhymes with fire ants, last chance, lance, etc.
Submitted by nogagreflex (user info) at 2005-11-02 20:41:06 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
it was very interesting
Submitted by Phallic_Cymbals (user info) at 2005-11-02 20:39:35 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
You rubbed each others' necks,
Y halo thar, buttsecks.
The chorus was great.
Submitted by horse87 (user info) at 2005-11-02 20:26:12 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by starshine (user info) at 2005-11-02 20:20:39 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
You are a fucking GENIUS.
Y halo thar, buttsecks.
Submitted by Average_Dan (user info) at 2005-11-02 20:07:36 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
I liked it Confusitron.
you should post more often!
Submitted by Confuzitron (user info) at 2005-11-02 19:51:53 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Orgasmatron (user info) at 2005-11-02 19:09:12 (#)
Ranking: 0
We're practically family, what with the 'tron' and all.
--------
Yeah, we're as related as confusion and orgasms can be! Thing is, you actually post. I can only be funny or entertaining in small doses. I have such chronic ADD that I don't even have the patience to sit down and write an actual post. Every now and then I'll try, then I'll be all like "fuck this" and then go set stuff on fire or something. When I actually do, it's usually randomness like this: http://www.ubersite.com/m/70131
Submitted by Magic_Monkey (user info) at 2005-11-02 19:33:59 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
That was great !!
Submitted by munkeypants (user info) at 2005-11-02 19:29:08 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Shamone!
Submitted by Orgasmatron (user info) at 2005-11-02 19:27:17 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
"Nothing rhymes with monkeypants,"
He said, doing his funky dance.
Submitted by munkeypants (user info) at 2005-11-02 19:23:24 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
nothing rhymes with munkeypants
weeps
Submitted by Orgasmatron (user info) at 2005-11-02 19:09:12 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
We're practically family, what with the 'tron' and all.
Submitted by Confuzitron (user info) at 2005-11-02 18:04:20 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
"Well I knew that you liked menz most ghey
When Kaelic blew a kiss your way -
You rubbed each others' necks,
Y halo thar, buttsecks."
You are quickly becoming my favorite poster on uber. Keep up the awesome work.
Submitted by forensicgirl3 (user info) at 2005-11-02 17:56:25 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Brilliant
Submitted by JonnyX (user info) at 2005-11-02 17:49:12 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
greatness from the UberPoet Laureate!
Submitted by ghola (user info) at 2005-11-02 17:46:15 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Average_Dan (user info) at 2005-11-02 14:53:55 (#)
Ranking: 2
And on the 'net the writers screamed,
The emus cried and the rabbits dreamed,
But not a word was posted,
The uploads weren't hosted.
--------------------------------------------
This is my favorite line.
autoemutears+2
Submitted by AshK (user info) at 2005-11-02 17:35:21 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Fuckityfuckfuck
@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@
B@W
@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@
<bangs head on desk>
Submitted by EatMeCompletely (user info) at 2005-11-02 17:28:13 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by electrictoothsyndrome (user info) at 2005-11-02 14:41:11 (#)
Ranking: 2
You rubbed each others' necks,
Y halo thar, buttsecks.
-----------------
BWAAAAAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH!!!!!
Holy Jesus, that's funny!
I can hear it in my head.
Submitted by MyTeeOne (user info) at 2005-11-02 17:27:06 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Bravo. I've got a guitar, let's record.
Submitted by trent_nz (user info) at 2005-11-02 17:24:49 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
lmao!!
Submitted by ScoutCJustice (user info) at 2005-11-02 17:11:18 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Best song ever!
Submitted by Unabonger (user info) at 2005-11-02 16:37:48 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
nice
Submitted by NerfHerder (user info) at 2005-11-02 16:05:24 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Good work.
Submitted by Orgasmatron (user info) at 2005-11-02 16:05:05 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Oh, the various edits that I could create to appease people...
Submitted by Average_Dan (user info) at 2005-11-02 16:04:04 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Orgasmatron (user info) at 2005-11-02 16:00:15 (#)
Ranking: 2
Pentameter,
Change:
And as the flame war burned all through the night,
With bullshit taunts thrown left and right,
I saw Shlongly laughing with delight
The day the Uber died.
To:
And as those funbags, felt, brought Dan delight
Pent'meter drew a bowie knife
She chopped Dan's pink cock off with a slice
The day the Uber died.
Problem solved.
------------------------
Don't give her any Ideas Omatron!
Submitted by RamJetMax (user info) at 2005-11-02 16:00:55 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Awesome.
I predict one of the top posts of all-time.
Submitted by FallenZer0 (user info) at 2005-11-02 15:52:02 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
beautiful
Submitted by Orgasmatron (user info) at 2005-11-02 15:30:13 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Iceman: You can be my starfish smoocher anytime.
Maverick: Bullshit...you can be mine.
*cue Kenny Loggins*
Submitted by CHR15 (user info) at 2005-11-02 15:24:46 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
If I was a ghey menz, I would totally rim you dude.
Submitted by MandaPanda (user info) at 2005-11-02 15:24:28 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Good post.
Submitted by CaptainThorns (user info) at 2005-11-02 15:24:10 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Orgasmatron (user info) at 2005-11-02 13:41:11 (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Orgasmatron (user info) at 2005-10-14 10:23:52 (#)
Ranking: 2
I, too, have been working on a little something in the way of an Ubersite song. Not so much in the way of something recorded, though. Good job.
----
Cap'n - That's from your 'Ubersite Theme Song' post - http://www.ubersite.com/m/77040
I should have said 'I've been thinking about doing a little something because I'm a lazy prick' at the time, as I was only at the point where I thought that combining this site's madness with American Pie was a cool idea.
I finally got around to cooking something up this morning.
Record it if you like. I won't object.
I may even be a little flattered.
I'll blush like a schoolgirl taking a look at her first hangdown.
=================================================================
I just may have to record it tomorrow night then. :)
Submitted by badassmofo (user info) at 2005-11-02 15:04:28 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Awe...*smacks orgasmatron on the ass*
Submitted by Average_Dan (user info) at 2005-11-02 15:02:14 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Here you go BAMF: http://www.ubersite.com/m/78238#1672631
Submitted by Susie_Derkins (user info) at 2005-11-02 15:01:00 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
GOLD
Submitted by Orgasmatron (user info) at 2005-11-02 14:58:42 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Mofo -- take a look below at the mock up I did for Average Dan. You're in there.
'Badassmofo' is a difficult term to drop into something like this, with its syllables and flow and all.
Submitted by Orgasmatron (user info) at 2005-11-02 14:56:19 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
B&W is the now-defunct sister soda of A&W root beer.
It went tits up after customers noticed uncomfortable amounts of fecal material in their ice cream floats.
Or so Wikipedia tells me, anyway.
Submitted by badassmofo (user info) at 2005-11-02 14:54:28 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
I'd like to -2 you for your complete lack of badass...
...but this was too funny.
Submitted by Average_Dan (user info) at 2005-11-02 14:53:55 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
And on the 'net the writers screamed,
The emus cried and the rabbits dreamed,
But not a word was posted,
The uploads weren't hosted.
--------------------------------------------
This is my favorite line.
autoemutears+2
Submitted by Quale (user info) at 2005-11-02 14:46:59 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Goddamn hilarious dude, good work.
Submitted by electrictoothsyndrome (user info) at 2005-11-02 14:41:11 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
You rubbed each others' necks,
Y halo thar, buttsecks.
-----------------
BWAAAAAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH!!!!!
Holy Jesus, that's funny!
I can hear it in my head.
Submitted by Average_Dan (user info) at 2005-11-02 14:38:24 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
+2 for me cybergrabbing pentameter's boobies!
I nominating this for B&W immediately...or as soon as I find out what it is.
Submitted by TigerLilly (user info) at 2005-11-02 14:31:39 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
This WAS SAWSOME
Submitted by Pentameter (user info) at 2005-11-02 14:29:10 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Hahahahaha...WTF?
Thanks for adding a line in there about my tits.
Submitted by a_reader (user info) at 2005-11-02 14:23:55 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Wow.
Submitted by Method (user info) at 2005-11-02 14:05:23 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
fuckin awesome
Submitted by Orgasmatron (user info) at 2005-11-02 13:59:42 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Dan,
Change:
And as I read my new replies,
The anger built up deep inside,
No writer born in hell
Could break that Shlongy's spell.
To:
Average Dan the Answer Man
Pentam'ters tits were in his hand
No mere bad ass mofo
Could tweak those nipples so.
when you sing this.
Submitted by Jack_McCallum (user info) at 2005-11-02 13:59:27 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Spucking fectacular!
Submitted by Mike00295 (user info) at 2005-11-02 13:54:37 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
BLACK & WHITE !!!
BLACK & WHITE !!!
BLACK & WHITE !!!
BLACK & WHITE !!!
BLACK & WHITE !!!
BLACK & WHITE !!!
BLACK & WHITE !!!
BLACK & WHITE !!!
You have my vote.
Submitted by fudgepacker (user info) at 2005-11-02 13:54:34 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
You've done Don Mclean proud.
Well done, sir.
Submitted by Average_Dan (user info) at 2005-11-02 13:53:05 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by AshK (user info) at 2005-11-02 13:50:40 (#)
Ranking: 2
I don't see B&W....why hasn't anyone said B&W?!
Bastards!
-------------------
Black and White??
Submitted by Average_Dan (user info) at 2005-11-02 13:52:14 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
+2 again, even though you left me out. :-/
Submitted by AshK (user info) at 2005-11-02 13:50:40 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
I don't see B&W....why hasn't anyone said B&W?!
Bastards!
Submitted by Mike00295 (user info) at 2005-11-02 13:44:53 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Holy crap cakes that was good.
Submitted by Orgasmatron (user info) at 2005-11-02 13:41:11 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Orgasmatron (user info) at 2005-10-14 10:23:52 (#)
Ranking: 2
I, too, have been working on a little something in the way of an Ubersite song. Not so much in the way of something recorded, though. Good job.
----
Cap'n - That's from your 'Ubersite Theme Song' post - http://www.ubersite.com/m/77040
I should have said 'I've been thinking about doing a little something because I'm a lazy prick' at the time, as I was only at the point where I thought that combining this site's madness with American Pie was a cool idea.
I finally got around to cooking something up this morning.
Record it if you like. I won't object.
I may even be a little flattered.
I'll blush like a schoolgirl taking a look at her first hangdown.
Submitted by full_frontal (user info) at 2005-11-02 13:40:49 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
pretty pretty pprreeeeettttttyyyyy....
good.
Submitted by skrapmetal (user info) at 2005-11-02 13:40:22 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Interesting lyrical rewrite. Hasn't every wacky morning radio show in the world been doing this kind of thing since the 70's?
+0riginal.
Submitted by The_Yellow_Dart (user info) at 2005-11-02 13:38:28 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Zee uber poet
Submitted by CaptainThorns (user info) at 2005-11-02 13:35:16 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
I see I'm not the only one that does this stuff. Most excellent job!
How would you like an audio recording of this?
Submitted by HadToBeDone (user info) at 2005-11-02 13:34:39 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Professional_Peon (user info) at 2005-11-02 13:34:00 (#)
Ranking: 2
I liked this better then the original... I shall sing it tonight at karaokee in your honor.
Maybe I should record it and post that haha!
----
I would send you several vials of spooge if you did that....
Submitted by Professional_Peon (user info) at 2005-11-02 13:34:00 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
I liked this better then the original... I shall sing it tonight at karaokee in your honor.
Maybe I should record it and post that haha!
Submitted by ruthless (user info) at 2005-11-02 13:32:11 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Awesome.
Submitted by Grimm (user info) at 2005-11-02 13:30:55 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
That was the first thing I've seen on here that truly kicked major ass!! EXCELLENT!!!
Submitted by cuberat (user info) at 2005-11-02 13:28:40 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Fuck yea
Submitted by Average_Dan (user info) at 2005-11-02 13:25:54 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Fucking spectacular!!
I loved every second of it. I even sang it to the tune.
You are a god among men!
Submitted by WildcatMcGee (user info) at 2005-11-02 13:20:37 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
What talent.
Submitted by CHR15 (user info) at 2005-11-02 13:15:55 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Emo tears roll down my face,
When Orgasmatron hits up the place.
Submitted by morontian (user info) at 2005-11-02 13:13:17 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by nitty34 (user info) at 2005-11-02 13:11:37 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Out.
Fucking.
Standing.