Uber Menz: Some advice, please (728 hits)
Category: NoneRating: -0.61 on 42 reviews (Rate this item) (V)
Submitted by crazyaardvark (View user info) at 2005-11-03 02:19:59 EST
Uber Menz
(and I know there are many on here lurking, writing posts about rape, touching themselves inappropriately, eating burritos and getting little bits of sauce stuck in their keyboards)
I have a serious question.
Hypothetically:
Say you used to work part time with a girl at some ridiculous sales job. You never showed any over interest in her apart from some harmless flirting, which you do with any female that comes within a 5 metre radius of yourself.
More than 6 months after you last saw this girl you text message her to say hello. You also ask pointedly how her "bf" is going, and then, when the girl claims her singularity (singleness? singlifity?) claim your own and ask if the aformentioned girl would like to "ctch up sumtime?"
Hypothetically you are also a Australian-Indian pimp-styler with a Hyundai Accent with a turbo in it, a huge inheritance and more gold than Cleopatra.
Anyway, Uber Menz, the question:
Is this a booty call?
I asked him that, and he replied "Why wld you thnk that?"
Men. Honestly, he never showed any interest in me when I was under his nose.
So, Uber Menz, fount of knowledge that you are, what should I do about it?
I would like to hang out with him, but I don't want anything else. I know he is a player because I heard the stories from the horses mouth when we worked together.
If I get much more desperate I may just go in for a little Oreo action. It has been a long time between drinks
Uber Menz, if I use him for sex, would that be mean?
Or do men like that?
User Reviews
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2005-11-03 18:21:42 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
You sound gay.
So forget about the broad and set your sights on "Steve" down in accounting.
Submitted by HadToBeDone (user info) at 2005-11-03 18:09:37 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by lordofthedance (user info) at 2005-11-03 17:49:44 (#)
Ranking: 2
P.S. No guy will ever answer "Yes" to the question "Is this a booty call?" because, whilst it may in fact be a booty call, admitting it reduces a guys chance of actually getting aforesaid booty.
----
*DING DING DING*
Submitted by JonnyX (user info) at 2005-11-03 18:08:03 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
I am ready to adjudicate my decision, but the informationists will be determinated by the appreances of your breastessess.
Submitted by lordofthedance (user info) at 2005-11-03 17:49:44 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Under no circumstances take advice from jeveuxgagger. He's the biggest tool on this site.
However, my sound advice is to give it a miss. Casual sex is soul destroying.
P.S. No guy will ever answer "Yes" to the question "Is this a booty call?" because, whilst it may in fact be a booty call, admitting it reduces a guys chance of actually getting aforesaid booty.
Submitted by MyTeeOne (user info) at 2005-11-03 13:36:08 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Sleep with him, don't sleep with him. You're both adults (aren't you?) and don't need our advice.
My advice btw: Don't sleep with the guy, he sounds like a chode. Sleep with me instead.
Submitted by Phallic_Cymbals (user info) at 2005-11-03 05:01:16 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
You're in Perth? Thank fuck.
Ask Circe, she's sexually normal: http://www.necrobabes.org/dolcett/main.htm
Submitted by Bushy (user info) at 2005-11-03 05:00:00 EST (#)
Ranking: -1
I wouldn't. Not that once off sex is bad, or sex for sex sake is bad, but because he has a hyundai accent that he has put a turbo in...yikes, that just screams fucktard. Not to mention he is clearly retarded to some extent, and noone should have sex with tards, even if its just for fun.
Submitted by zoobie2000 (user info) at 2005-11-03 04:52:43 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
-2DIE
Submitted by rad1101 (user info) at 2005-11-03 04:49:03 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by crazyaardvark (user info) at 2005-11-03 04:02:48 (#)
Ranking: 0
Rad, you of all people should know that gets boring after awhile.
======================================
YOU'VE BEEN TALKING TO MY WIFE, HAVEN'T YOU?
Submitted by crazyaardvark (user info) at 2005-11-03 04:47:24 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
I thought we already established that the term "bf" was quoting the text message I was sent.
I am not 13, I do not say "bf" in normal conversation.
I'm only posting on this because no one else is putting up any interesting posts. At all. Nothing.
Submitted by Berty (user info) at 2005-11-03 04:44:39 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Oh for heavens sake, it's not like he's a serious man. He wears teh bling bling and is clearly a man of the world who revels in his youth, knee deep in punanni. This is what he lives for, he's not a man to settle down and start a long term relationship. He's not some kind of delicate poet.
He likes to fuck. She likes to fuck. Berty says; let them fuck.
Submitted by The_Last_Prophet (user info) at 2005-11-03 04:40:36 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
-1 because you said "bf"
bf means nothing
its boyfriend
---------------------------
I beg to differ, "BF" does mean something.
Submitted by Yams (user info) at 2005-11-03 04:38:38 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
There should be more women like you.
That is, willing to "use" a man for sex...
Submitted by absolutzero (user info) at 2005-11-03 04:21:29 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
You can hang around with him.
Its very safe.....
Submitted by Berty (user info) at 2005-11-03 04:18:39 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by crazyaardvark (user info) at 2005-11-03 04:02:48 (#)
Ranking: 0
Rad, you of all people should know that gets boring after awhile.
It's nice to have someone else there, if only so they can scratch your back afterwards
------------
Now there's a woman.
Berty heartily approves.
Submitted by CHR15 (user info) at 2005-11-03 04:03:23 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
Please, -2 my post into the netherness of "-2 die"
-------------------------------------------------------
Ahem. -2DIE.
Submitted by crazyaardvark (user info) at 2005-11-03 04:02:48 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Rad, you of all people should know that gets boring after awhile.
It's nice to have someone else there, if only so they can scratch your back afterwards
Submitted by crazyaardvark (user info) at 2005-11-03 04:01:12 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
I'm sorry, I'm just a helpless noob who has lost her way and resorted to writing posts about her non-existant love-life.
Please, -2 my post into the netherness of "-2 die" and let it crash and flamey-flamey like Chapelle Corby's appeal.
It's either that or go and watch another episode of Buffy (shhhhh don't tell me what happens, I'm only up to series 5)
Submitted by rad1101 (user info) at 2005-11-03 03:58:21 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
I hear great things about masturbation
Submitted by rad1101 (user info) at 2005-11-03 03:58:00 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Oh no.
you aren't getting off that easily.
well, actually you could be getting off easily, but you decided to post about it on UBer rather than go and get off.
Submitted by crazyaardvark (user info) at 2005-11-03 03:42:18 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
That's it. I'm -2 ing myself.
I do sound like a tool.
Sorry. I must have had low blood sugar or a head injury (an esky did fall on my head yesterday) or something. Jeez.
Let us never speak of this again.
Submitted by rad1101 (user info) at 2005-11-03 03:41:05 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Oh, in that case:
Y HELO THAR?
Submitted by CHR15 (user info) at 2005-11-03 03:40:41 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
Did you tell him about your STD's?
Submitted by FilthyAssistant (user info) at 2005-11-03 03:33:15 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
I don't whether it's the notorious 'fourth day without nicotine' making me say this but, this post makes you come across like a complete fucking tool.
Submitted by jeveuxgagner (user info) at 2005-11-03 03:31:37 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
argh bummer.
good luck though
hope he doesnt get clingy
http://www.ubersite.com/m/77456 <----------- thats to remind you sex can get complicated
Submitted by Berty (user info) at 2005-11-03 03:27:41 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by crazyaardvark (user info) at 2005-11-03 03:17:50 (#)
Ranking: 0
No, I am not a fat chick. I'm not deformed or missing a leg or anything either
Just a little shy, that's all.
-------------
I find that very endearing. Anyway, the guy sounds like a guy to fuck but certainly not to get attatched to.
I say, go play and have fun.
Submitted by crazyaardvark (user info) at 2005-11-03 03:25:19 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
No, sorry, jeveuxgagner, I'm in Perth. Thanks for the offer though.
All the men are inbred around here. You can see marks on the pavement where there has been years of knuckles dragging on the ground.
It could be worse I suppose. It could be Tasmania
Submitted by bitterlemon (user info) at 2005-11-03 03:22:52 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
good post
Submitted by jeveuxgagner (user info) at 2005-11-03 03:20:00 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
aardvark if you're a littel shy.. and live in sydney ... and want a "booty call"
well... i live in sydney too...
and i won't mind if you use me..
Submitted by jeveuxgagner (user info) at 2005-11-03 03:18:32 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
ok FINE rad, but i didnt read it properly the first time and then i tried to save face.
this should even it out.
Submitted by crazyaardvark (user info) at 2005-11-03 03:17:50 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
No, I am not a fat chick. I'm not deformed or missing a leg or anything either
Just a little shy, that's all.
Submitted by rad1101 (user info) at 2005-11-03 03:12:25 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
jeveuxgagner, she was quoting some text messages, for effect, you see.
don't be a knob.
Submitted by jeveuxgagner (user info) at 2005-11-03 03:07:18 EST (#)
Ranking: -1
and i dont care that you were catching although it does make me think he is a loser and you shuld tell him to rack off. "ur call"
typing ur actually hurts me.
so gay.
Submitted by jeveuxgagner (user info) at 2005-11-03 03:05:54 EST (#)
Ranking: -1
root him
seriously.
even if he really likes you, which is possible if you had a boyfriend before, he will appreciate the sex.
as long as you dont make him think its serious, go for it, because IF he even wants a relationship, hes not gunna mind if he ONLY gets sex.
basicly having sex is a win win situation; just dont make him think its serious.
he wouldnt care.
-1 because you said "bf"
bf means nothing
its boyfriend
Submitted by rad1101 (user info) at 2005-11-03 03:04:32 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
are you a fat chick?
Submitted by Beer_bong (user info) at 2005-11-03 03:02:48 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
Go fuck, but first rip out your uterus. If you ever breed the world will implode.
Cunt.
Submitted by crazyaardvark (user info) at 2005-11-03 03:02:16 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
I'm sorry, I know, it's lame. But honestly I think my knowledge of courting and the sexcapades of the human animal has dimished during my period of singleness.
I swear I've forgotten what sex is
I reckon if a guy wanted to fuck I'd be like "What? You want to put that WHERE? You sick bastard!"
But honestly, I asked him if it was a booty call, ALL HE HAD TO DO WAS SAY YES.
Submitted by Phate (user info) at 2005-11-03 02:55:19 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
MY EYEZ ARE TEH BLEEDIN
Submitted by rad1101 (user info) at 2005-11-03 02:44:24 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
needs more skullfucking
Submitted by williamson (user info) at 2005-11-03 02:32:19 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
Never say the words "booty call". Ever.
Also, why post this shit on uber? Do you not know how to set up a MySpace account?
It makes me ashamed to know that you too are Australian.
Submitted by The_Last_Prophet (user info) at 2005-11-03 02:26:07 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
DO IT! SEX I MEAN! TAKE PICS. BETTER YET, VIDEO! SEND US THE LINK. WE WILL LOOK AT THEM AND GET BACK TO YOU ON HOW WE THINK YOUR ACTIONS CAN BE CHARACTERIZED. I know you said you're being serious. But, what the hell!!! So am I! If I were him, I'd do you. If he were me, you'd do me too!
Submitted by pen_name (user info) at 2005-11-03 02:23:55 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
haha, wow.