THIS POST WORKSish content in the review. (992 hits)
Category: Business & FinancialRating: 1.33 on 17 reviews (Rate this item) (V)
Submitted by DC'entertaining'Woody (View user info) at 2005-11-11 14:40:59 EST
User Reviews
Submitted by Chroniclysm (user info) at 2008-06-27 02:55:53 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
+2?
Submitted by electrictoothsyndrome (user info) at 2005-11-11 16:50:04 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Look at this: http://www.ubersite.com//
Now look at the 9th thing down called "adtest".
Look at the date! That's the first of this month.
Bart's putting ads on uber, I think.
Submitted by electrictoothsyndrome (user info) at 2005-11-11 16:40:59 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
I've got two posts with the content in the reviews...
This one is a complete analysis of B@W authors and other uber stats: http://www.ubersite.com/m/78885#1688950
It's got some other uberlinks too.
http://www.ubersite.com//stats/index.html
Submitted by HadToBeDone (user info) at 2005-11-11 15:46:47 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by MANICMOTHER (user info) at 2005-11-11 15:37:17 (#)
Ranking: 2
Nice job Woody. I love the blondes.
----
Such a poifekt laidee....
Submitted by MANICMOTHER (user info) at 2005-11-11 15:37:17 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Nice job Woody. I love the blond jokes.
Submitted by DCWoody (user info) at 2005-11-11 15:29:31 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
that ranking system has never been used while Im here, and Ive been here for quite a while.
Submitted by HadToBeDone (user info) at 2005-11-11 15:22:44 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Total KB sent this month?
24882096
Now, follow along:
24,882,096 * 1MB/1024KB = 24,298.92 MB * 1GB/1024 MB = 23.73 GB
Ouch.
Submitted by HadToBeDone (user info) at 2005-11-11 15:18:34 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
http://www.ubersite.com//emot.html
Better ranking sustem
Submitted by DCWoody (user info) at 2005-11-11 15:16:54 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
yeah, fake uber
Submitted by thorpe (user info) at 2005-11-11 15:15:44 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by DCWoody (user info) at 2005-11-11 15:07:02 (#)
Ranking: 0
http://www.ubersite.com//mockup.html
---------------------------
Holy shit
Submitted by DCWoody (user info) at 2005-11-11 15:08:10 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
http://www.ubersite.com//everyone.txt
Submitted by DCWoody (user info) at 2005-11-11 15:07:02 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
http://www.ubersite.com//mockup.html
Submitted by DCWoody (user info) at 2005-11-11 15:06:18 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
http://www.ubersite.com//robots.txt
Submitted by DCWoody (user info) at 2005-11-11 15:03:08 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
http://www.ubersite.com//stats/www2005/totals1105.html
Submitted by WildcatMcGee (user info) at 2005-11-11 14:50:47 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
http://www.geocities.com/bigpigsnuts/disk_drive.html
Submitted by DCWoody (user info) at 2005-11-11 14:42:59 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
I am the only one to have thought of this I think, go me.
--------------------------------------------
Thought this might bring a smile to your lips Cinderella was now 75 years old. After a fulfilling life with the now dead Prince, she happily sat upon her rocking chair, watching the world go by from her front porch, with a cat called Alan for companionship.
One sunny afternoon, out of nowhere, appeared the Fairy Godmother. Cinderella said "Fairy Godmother, what are you doing here after all these years?" The Fairy Godmother replied "Well Cinderella, since you have lived a good, wholesome life since we last met, I have decided to grant you 3 wishes. Is there anything for which your heart still yearns?"
Cinderella is taken aback, overjoyed and after some thoughtful consideration and almost under her breath she uttered her first wish: "I wish I was wealthy beyond comprehension." Instantly, her rocking chair was turned into solid gold. Cinderella was stunned. Alan, her old faithful cat, jumped off her lap and scampered to the edge of the porch, quivering with fear. Cinderella said "Oh thank you, Fairy God Mother".
The Fairy Godmother replied "It is the least I can do. What does your heart wish for your second wish?" Cinderella looked down at her frail body, and said: "I wish I was young and full of the beauty of youth again". At once, her wish having been desired, became reality, and her beautiful youthful visage had returned. Cinderella felt stirrings inside her that had been dormant for years and long forgotten vigour and vitality began to course through her very soul.
Then the Fairy Godmother again spoke "You have one more wish, what shall you have?" Cinderella looked over to the frightened cat in the corner and said, "I wish you to transform Alan my old cat into a beautiful, and handsome young man". Magically, Alan suddenly underwent so fundamental a change in his biological make-up, that when complete he stood before her, a young man, so beautiful the like of which she nor the world had ever seen, so fair indeed that birds begun to fall from the sky at his feet.
The Fairy Godmother again spoke: "Congratulations, Cinderella. Enjoy your new life." And, with a blazing shock of bright blue electricity, she was gone. For a few eerie moments, Alan and Cinderella looked into each other's eyes.
Cinderella sat, breathless, gazing at the most stunningly perfect young man she had ever seen. Then Alan walked over to Cinderella, who sat transfixed in her rocking chair, and held her close in his young muscular arms. He leant in close to her ear, and into her ear breathed as much as whispered, blowing her golden hair with his warm breath, "I bet you regret having me de-sexed now, don't you?"
--------------------------------------------
A couple with their young son decided to spend a day at a nude beach. After an hour in the sun, the father went for a walk while the son played in the water. After a while the boy came up to his mother and said, "Mommy, I saw ladies with boobies a lot bigger than yours!" The mother said, "The bigger they are, the dumber they are." So the boy went back to play. Minutes later the boy returned and said, "Mommy, I saw men with dingers a lot bigger than Daddy's." The mother said the same thing: "The bigger they are, the dumber they are... " so the boy went back to play. Several minutes later the boy ran back to his mother and said, "Mommy, I just saw Daddy talking to the dumbest lady I ever saw, and the more he talked, the dumber he got..."
--------------------------------------------
Good:
A policeman had a perfect spot to watch for speeders, but wasn't nabbing any. Then, he discovered the problem - a 10 year old boy was standing up the road with a hand painted sign which read "RADAR TRAP AHEAD". The officer then found a young accomplice down the road in the other direction with a sign reading "TIPS" and a bucket full of change.
Better:
A motorist was mailed a picture of his car speeding through an automated radar trap. A $180.00 speeding ticket was included.
Being cute, he sent the police department a picture of $180.00. They responded with a mailed photo of handcuffs.
Best:
A young woman was pulled over for speeding. As the motorcycle officer walked to her car window, flipping open his ticket book, she said "I BET YOU ARE GOING TO SELL ME A TICKET TO THE MOTORCYCLE COP'S BALL". He replied with "MOTORCYCLE COPS DON'T HAVE BALLS". There was a moment of silence while she smiled, and he realised what he'd just said. He then closed his book, got back on his motorcycle and left. She was laughing too hard to start her car for several minutes.
--------------------------------------------
Submitted by DCWoody (user info) at 2005-11-11 14:42:27 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Am I the only one to have thought of this?
A blonde bought two horses, and could never remember which was which. A neighbor suggested that she cut the tail of one horse and that worked great until the other horse got his tail caught in a bush. It tore just right and looked exactly like the other horse's tail and our blonde friend was stuck again. The neighbor suggested she notch the ear of one horse. That worked fine until the other horse caught his ear on a barbed wire fence. Once again our friend couldn't tell them apart. The neighbor suggested she measure the horses for height. When she did, she was very pleased to find that the white horse was 2 inches taller than the black one.
--------------------------------------------
A blond is driving down the road. She notices that she's low on gas so she stops at the gas station. While she's pumping her gas, she notices that she locked the keys in the car. So when she goes inside to pay, she asks the attendant for a hanger so she can attempt to open the door herself. She goes outside and begins to jimmy the lock. Ten minutes later, the attendant goes outside to see how the blond is faring. The blond outside of the car is moving the hanger around and around, while the blond inside of the car is saying, "A little more to the left...a little more to the right!!"
--------------------------------------------
Two blondes were working on a house. One, who was nailing down siding would reach into her nail pouch, pull out a nail and either toss it over her shoulder or nail it in. The other blonde, figuring this was worth looking into, asked, "Why are you throwing those nails away?" The first blonde explained, "If I pull a nail out of my pouch and it's pointed TOWARD me, I throw it away 'cause it's defective. If it's pointed toward the HOUSE, then I nail it in!" The second blonde got completely pissed off and yelled, "You MORON!!! The nails pointed toward you aren't defective! They're for the OTHER side of the house!!"
--------------------------------------------
Two blondes were in a parking lot trying to unlock the door of their Mercedes with a coat hanger. They tried and tried to get the door open, but they couldn't. The girl with the coat hanger stopped for a moment to catch her breath, and her friend said anxiously, "Hurry up! It's starting to rain, and the top is down."
--------------------------------------------
A blonde woman competed with a brunette woman and a redheaded woman in the Breast Stroke division of an English Channel swim competition. The brunette came in first, the redhead second. The blonde woman finally reached shore completely exhausted.After being revived with blankets and coffee she remarked, "I don't want to complain, but I think those other two girls used their arms.
--------------------------------------------
A young blonde woman is distraught because she fears her husband is having an affair. She goes to a gun shop and buys a handgun and, the next day she comes home to find her husband in bed with a beautiful redhead. She grabs the gun and holds it to her own head. The husband jumps out of bed, begging and pleading with her not to shoot herself. Hysterically the blonde responds to the husband, "Shut up...you're next!"
--------------------------------------------
A man goes into a cafe and sits down. A waitress comes to take his order, and he asks her, "What's the special of the day?" "Chili," she says, "but the gentleman next to you got the last bowl." The man says he'll just have coffee, and the waitress goes to fetch it. As he waited, he noticed the man next to him was eating a full lunch and the bowl of chili remained uneaten. "Are you going to eat your chili?" he asked. "No, help yourself," replied his neighbor. The man picked up a spoon and eagerly began devouring the chili. When he got halfway through the bowl, he noticed the body of a dead mouse in the bottom of the bowl. Sickened, he puked the chili he had just eaten back into the bowl. The man sitting next to him says, "Yeah, that's as far as I got, too."