If you ever reach total enlightenment while drinking beer, I bet you could shoot beer out of your nose. (470 hits)
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Submitted by proofofpurchase (View user info) at 2005-11-11 16:04:17 EST
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Submitted by freebie (user info) at 2005-11-11 16:38:38 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Blink your eyelids-HAHA
Submitted by proofofpurchase (user info) at 2005-11-11 16:26:44 EST (#)
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An actual tip from page 16 of the HP "Environmental, Health & Safety
Handbook for Employees:
"Blink your eyelids periodically to lubricate your eyes."
Submitted by proofofpurchase (user info) at 2005-11-11 16:24:27 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Two Polish guys were taking their first train trip to Warsaw on the train. A vendor came down the corridor selling bananas which they'd never seen before. Each bought one.
The first one eagerly peeled the banana and bit into it just as the train went into a tunnel. When the train emerged from the tunnel, he looked across to his friend and said, 'I wouldn't eat that if I were you.'
'Why not?'
'I took one bite and went blind for half a minute.'
Submitted by proofofpurchase (user info) at 2005-11-11 16:23:13 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
In Taiwan, the translation of the Pepsi slogan 'Come alive with the Pepsi Generation' came out as 'Pepsi will bring your ancestors back from the dead.'
Submitted by proofofpurchase (user info) at 2005-11-11 16:22:37 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
In Ohio, an unidentified man in his late twenties walked into a police station with a 9-inch wire protruding from his forehead and calmly asked officers to give him an X-ray to help him find his brain, which he claimed had been stolen. Police were shocked to learn that the man had drilled a 6-inch deep hole in his skull with a Black & Decker power drill and had stuck the wire in to try and find the missing brain.
Submitted by proofofpurchase (user info) at 2005-11-11 16:21:57 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
A company trying to continue its five-year perfect safety record showed its workers a film aimed at encouraging the use of safety goggles on the job. According to Industrial Machinery News, the film's depiction of gory industrial accidents was so graphic that twenty-five workers suffered minor injuries in their rush to leave the screening room. Thirteen others fainted, and one man required seven stitches after he cut his head falling off a chair while watching the film.
Submitted by Dante_Alighieri (user info) at 2005-11-11 16:16:54 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
HAHAHAHAHA!
Submitted by SkinnyKenny (user info) at 2005-11-11 16:16:26 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
This is not a feat which requires enlightenment.