I Think I’m Pretty…Do You Have A Problem With That? (4573 hits)
Category: GeneralRating: 1.59 on 116 reviews (Rate this item) (V)
Submitted by Pentameter (View user info) at 2005-11-17 08:50:19 EST
Sort of ranty.
Yes, I think I'm pretty. When I look in the mirror, I acknowledge the fact that I am an attractive woman, and I don't think it's a crime to do so. I also don't think that it makes me conceited or full of myself.
In a society that demands that women are thin, big breasted, made up all the time, dressed in clothes that reveal their bodies and carrying designer bags, I barely measure up. I do not fit society's view of womanly perfection. I could care less, and it is thanks to only one thing.
Confidence.
I know that I'm not a dog, but I also don't think that I am gorgeous and God's gift to the world. I don't think that my shit is ice cream and my ass is the freezer. I do not walk around claiming that I am the sexiest thing alive.
But I still think I'm pretty.
Having a high level of self esteem is critical. Self esteem enables a person to be able to trust that he or she is able to make decisions without worrying about the approval of others. Self esteem enables a person to fail at certain things and still feel positive about him or herself.
Not accepting compliments is counteractive to the concept of self esteem. When a person gives another person a compliment, what they are really saying is, "This is something about you that is worthy of being recognized." When a person accepts a compliment, what they are really saying is, "Thank you for noticing the good qualities that I have."
When we don't accept a compliment, we're putting ourselves down. We are saying, "I don't know why you feel this way about me, but I do not. I do not consider myself worthy of your attention or of your acknowledgement of this aspect of myself."
It doesn't matter if the quality is appearance, intelligence, athletic ability, and so on. Each individual person has qualities that are worthy of being recognized and acknowledged. Realizing that you have positive qualities does not make you conceited. It makes you a person who has a high level of self-confidence.
That's a beautiful thing.
If your boss tells you that you did a good job on a project, you should be proud of your hard work. If your friend tells you that they appreciated you staying up with them while they were going through a tough time, you should be glad that you can provide someone comfort when they are feeling low.
If someone tells you that you're attractive, you should be happy that they acknowledge your personal appearance.
All of these compliments are the same thing. Personal qualities are being recognized and acknowledged, and if you cannot accept them, then you cannot accept yourself as a person.
Personally, I think that we all have the right to proclaim the things we like about ourselves.
In our society, it is hypocritical to slam someone for thinking that their personal appearance is attractive. Look at the comments left on posts where someone posts an attractive picture. Now look at comments left on posts when someone posts an unattractive picture. I think the results will speak for themselves. There is nothing that is judged more than a person's appearance.
Since when is it bad to feel good about who you are as a person?
Inspired by: http://www.ubersite.com/m/79276
User Reviews
Submitted by Alter (user info) at 2007-09-26 20:59:53 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
No, Comment.
Submitted by Jack_McCallum (user info) at 2006-11-10 17:36:14 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
I just read a batch of these during my smoke breaks. Excellent.
Submitted by compEngineer0 (user info) at 2006-08-10 13:40:23 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by MistressFist (user info) at 2005-12-20 16:33:42 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Don't let Full Frontal get a look at this, no one can be prettier than him, that little fucker.
Submitted by Xcuses (user info) at 2005-12-20 16:29:29 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Yes, I think I'm pretty. When I look in the mirror, I acknowledge the fact that I am an attractive woman, and I don't think it's a crime to do so.
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Well let me get a better look at you and I'll decide for myself
Submitted by Mike00295 (user info) at 2005-12-05 15:24:39 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Pentameter (user info) at 2005-12-05 14:56:01 (#)
Ranking: 2
Hahahahahahaha...I'm fully into bubble baths.
You were only semi-right.
-------
How did I know that?
Sidenote- Please do not mind that thing in your bathroom that looks like a camera, up in the light fixture. It is not a camera.
Submitted by Mike00295 (user info) at 2005-12-05 11:17:40 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Did you see this yet?
http://www.ubersite.com/m/80274
It's semi-hot.
Submitted by Ejryuu (user info) at 2005-11-21 12:39:15 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
You sure showed him!
Submitted by joedaddy (user info) at 2005-11-20 00:06:16 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
jesus, i leave for a few minutes and some boy-toy thinks he can take my place up here
Submitted by Barnymeinhoff (user info) at 2005-11-19 15:00:22 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
think less
Submitted by joedaddy (user info) at 2005-11-19 00:10:04 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
i'm still going to be on top
Submitted by phauna (user info) at 2005-11-18 23:58:11 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
I actually try to act worse to beautiful people, as I feel someone has to. It seems good looking people are treated better than most, so I believe it's my duty to even this up. Anyone who would like to join with me in saving the world from annoying good looking people can start by being a little bit aloof to the next person trying to charm their way into your favour.
Also, as long as you aren't missing any teeth or limbs, most women are treated very nicely indeed, and guys are usually kind of ignored. I'm cool with being ignored, but everyone should get it.
Submitted by CanucksFan (user info) at 2005-11-18 21:58:13 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
Only good looking people can brag about their looks.
Submitted by knucklesnelson (user info) at 2005-11-18 19:25:33 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by TigerLilly (user info) at 2005-11-18 17:43:40 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Pentameter (user info) at 2005-11-18 16:50:11 (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by rayrayshanaynay (user info) at 2005-11-18 15:44:19 (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by TigerLilly (user info) at 2005-11-18 14:00:53 (#)
Ranking: 2
You're one cocky bitch.
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You forgot that I'm also a whore.
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<Diddles Self Next To Shlongy>
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2005-11-18 17:21:07 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
You're lucky I love whores.
Submitted by Pentameter (user info) at 2005-11-18 16:50:11 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by rayrayshanaynay (user info) at 2005-11-18 15:44:19 (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by TigerLilly (user info) at 2005-11-18 14:00:53 (#)
Ranking: 2
You're one cocky bitch.
----------------
You forgot that I'm also a whore.
Submitted by icarus1987 (user info) at 2005-11-18 16:13:21 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Society is into breasts again?.. good lord, did they finally ditch that horse-faced Paris Hilton girl?
Good post. The power of suggestion plays a huge role in animal society. Did you know that the physical development certain species of fish, including size and coloration, actually depends on the role they play in their society? Something to know if you ever play one of those stupid Trivial Pursuit games. Same thing is true of the Gray Wolf. The alpha female, for the most part, is the only one who will bare children.
Submitted by rayrayshanaynay (user info) at 2005-11-18 15:44:19 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by TigerLilly (user info) at 2005-11-18 14:00:53 (#)
Ranking: 2
You're one cocky bitch.
Submitted by Loren1 (user info) at 2005-11-18 14:32:12 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
"Being young and beautiful is just a fluke of nature, being old(er) and beautiful is an accomplishment."
I love that line. It's from The Golden Girls.
Submitted by TigerLilly (user info) at 2005-11-18 14:00:53 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
You're one cocky bitch.
Submitted by Whiplash (user info) at 2005-11-18 13:56:49 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
No, no problem with it.
Now get back in the kitchen, where you belong.
Submitted by Mike00295 (user info) at 2005-11-18 13:41:19 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Pentameter (user info) at 2005-11-18 09:46:24 (#)
Ranking: 2
INXS rules my pubes.
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Hilarious.
Now read this- http://www.ubersite.com/m/79453
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2005-11-18 11:07:37 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
I eat at the Y.
Submitted by CaptainThorns (user info) at 2005-11-18 10:56:04 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Nope...no problem with that at all. :D
Submitted by Flying_buttmonkey (user info) at 2005-11-18 03:02:04 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
When we don't accept a compliment, we're putting ourselves down. We are saying, "I don't know why you feel this way about me, but I do not. I do not consider myself worthy of your attention or of your acknowledgement of this aspect of myself."
It doesn't matter if the quality is appearance, intelligence, athletic ability, and so on. Each individual person has qualities that are worthy of being recognized and acknowledged. Realizing that you have positive qualities does not make you conceited. It makes you a person who has a high level of self-confidence
====
I can't accept compliments, I'm British for God's sake woman! We've perfected a perpetual state of 'Meh' and it's not our fault!
But then it probably is.
Submitted by munkeypants (user info) at 2005-11-18 00:11:39 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
i love lamp.
Submitted by bob (user info) at 2005-11-17 23:00:45 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
stfu caesar.
i mixed both
italiano and oh la la
i can do that because im the man
Submitted by antluvdog (user info) at 2005-11-17 22:55:20 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
If I wasn't interested in someone I'd make love to you.
Submitted by thecaes (user info) at 2005-11-17 20:42:52 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
I agree with you Pentameter. I also agree with a lot of what was said in the reviews here. Lots of interesting stuff to read here...too bad my attention span sucks ass right now.
Submitted by thecaes (user info) at 2005-11-17 20:41:29 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by bob (user info) at 2005-11-17 15:44:33 (#)
Ranking: 2
miss lucy is a fellow italiano?
oh la la
****************
??
That's French.
Submitted by electrictoothsyndrome (user info) at 2005-11-17 19:59:56 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
Submitted by The_Cyst_Master (user info) at 2005-11-17 14:52:50 (#)
Ranking: 2
I've accepted the fact that I am a cartoon character with an abnormally large penis and an uncanny ability to have sex with anyone and anything, then kill it, and have sex with it again.
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Heh.
Submitted by DonkeyOnTheEdge (user info) at 2005-11-17 18:29:32 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
No.
Submitted by Xcuses (user info) at 2005-11-17 16:24:25 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
I got to talk to you on the phone = +2 (even though that doesn't really make sense)
Submitted by Anansie (user info) at 2005-11-17 16:18:39 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by bob (user info) at 2005-11-17 15:44:33 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
miss lucy is a fellow italiano?
oh la la.
Submitted by BLITZKREIG_BOB (user info) at 2005-11-17 14:59:34 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
I try to keep a balance of confidence and humility. Both will get you far if you know how to use them,
Submitted by The_Cyst_Master (user info) at 2005-11-17 14:52:50 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
I've accepted the fact that I am a cartoon character with an abnormally large penis and an uncanny ability to have sex with anyone and anything, then kill it, and have sex with it again.
Submitted by The_Yellow_Dart (user info) at 2005-11-17 13:14:06 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by tinactin (user info) at 2005-11-17 13:12:39 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
76 reviews already? If we weren't related, I would despise you.
Submitted by Jeanneee (user info) at 2005-11-17 12:24:28 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
I think you're pretty too. Right on.
Submitted by inion_de_trua (user info) at 2005-11-17 11:50:53 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
ok on the other hand alot of people get rewarded for mediocrity. like encouraging children that really are bad at something by saying you're doing great! when they're sucking balls at whatever it is. confidence yes, that's great, so is good self esteem, however there alot of idiots out there that while not conceited definitely have the wrong impression of their personal assets because they got a cookie for everything they did.
these are like my ovaries rule posts....
Submitted by Dervel (user info) at 2005-11-17 11:42:49 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
I think I'm brilliant. A dashingly handsome, suave and sophisticated beast of a man armed with a rapier like wit and a pair of guns that would make John Wayne weep tears of bitter resentment.
In short, I'm awesome and I make women swoon and bar floors sticky.
Go me. Woo!
Submitted by RyuFu (user info) at 2005-11-17 11:16:57 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
The fact that you are a chick and a born-and-bred Yankees fan makes you beautiful.
OMG, LIEK WILL U BE MY INTARWEB GURLFREND?????
Submitted by SiskelandFatboy (user info) at 2005-11-17 11:12:14 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
I agree with Caul. Especially about insecurities and the inability to laugh about them being an energy drain.
And U R teh hawtn3ss
Submitted by Bigmike (user info) at 2005-11-17 11:08:25 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
I thought it was "she thinks her shit is ice cream and everybody wants two scoops?"
I am a stupid, ugly idiot whose only saving grace is that he knows where the comma's and periods go. Once I came to terms with that, I felt infinitely better about myself.
Submitted by Caulaincourt (user info) at 2005-11-17 11:03:07 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
The problem here is false confidence. The same kind of "confidence" that makes people say stuff like: "Is your daddy a thief? Because he stole all the stars and put them in your eyes!" (<- ground for execution) The same kind of confidence that makes a woman who like a walrus adress you in the street with lines such as "Hey baby! Roooar!" and then give you the "You can't handle THAT" look. (<- ground for a pile-driver)
A woman who is aware of what she's worth, who is really confident won't be arrogant like that. Unlike those stupid cunts, she'll respect herself and the guy in question (because being yelled at isn't exactly flattering - unless you're a reject)
That's why I get along a lot better with women over 30, especially at work. Some are pretty good looking and it's enhanced by an honest smile and you can easily read their eyes since they don't hide behind some cheap mask of self-assurance. Too bad I only end up with 20-something dumb bitches for girlfriends who play little games and make test because they're too unsure. I don't mind insecurities, we all have them, but people who can't laugh about them are energy drains, and fucking boring/ordinary.
This reply had run-on sentences, I know.
Submitted by Coyote (user info) at 2005-11-17 10:59:16 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
Results of a Google image search for "I think I'm pretty":
4 dogs, 2 babies, 3 teenage girls, a car... and 2 machine guns.
The problem with Camille Paglia is she's never around when you need her.
Submitted by fudgepacker (user info) at 2005-11-17 10:59:03 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Oh yeah youre pretty good looking for a girl
but your back is so broken
and this feelings still gonna linger on
until the year 2525 now
Yeah youre pretty good looking for a girl
your eyes are wide open
and your thoughts have been stolen by the boys
who took you out and bought you everything you
want now
Yeah youre pretty good looking
oh yeah
youre pretty good looking
yes youre pretty good looking
oh yeah
for a girl
Lots of people in this world
but I want to be your boy
to me that thought is sounding so absurd
and I dont wanna be your toy
cause youre pretty good looking for a girl
my futures wide open
but this feelings still gonna linger on
until I know everything I need to know now
Yeah youre pretty good looking
oh yeah
youre pretty good looking
yes youre pretty good looking
oh yeah
for a girl
Submitted by MickGinny (user info) at 2005-11-17 10:57:25 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Are you saying that we live in a superficial materialistic society? Does this mean my lifelong dream of being a male super model is in jeopardy?
I believe that 13 year old boys are the most confident people in society. They believe so much that they are beautiful that they fall head over heels and molest themselves 18 times per day.
I think you are pretty from the photos I have seen, but your attractiveness comes from me observing how you express yourself on this site.
Submitted by c1ndy (user info) at 2005-11-17 10:56:44 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
I think I have the opposite of annorexia. Everyone else is critical of the way I look and I always think I look super.
Submitted by Teephphah (user info) at 2005-11-17 10:48:24 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Circe (user info) at 2005-11-17 10:43:06 (#)
Ranking: 2
Aaah I get you now Teeph.
And I think it IS that we consider beauty, physical attractiveness, to be so much more important than anything else. People who are intelligent and talented, or anything else, are not threatening.
---------------------------------------------------
I think you're right, but when you spell it out like that and then take a second to look at the reality of it . . . how fucked up is THAT?!
We didn't rise above the rest of the animal kingdom because we were the prettiest. We did so because we are the most intelligent (except for dolphins and sponges, but they don't count because they are marine animals) and yet we think of someone else's intelligence as LESS threatening than their beauty.
I guess you can never rise too far above the primal urges of your DNA.
Submitted by Average_Dan (user info) at 2005-11-17 10:43:57 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Well, as I have no chance with you anyways (being as I look like an X-stalker of yours) I might as well just put it out there, and if you don't like it, you can just send it right back...
I want to be on you.
Submitted by Circe (user info) at 2005-11-17 10:43:06 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Aaah I get you now Teeph.
And I think it IS that we consider beauty, physical attractiveness, to be so much more important than anything else. People who are intelligent and talented, or anything else, are not threatening. And any list of their abilities will always be prefaced with "She may not be pretty, but"
"Kathy Bates may be ugly, but she's a great actress."
"Aretha Franklin sure is a fat bitch, but she can sing."
No matter how good they are, they're not a threat.
But beautiful people? Threatening, instantly. Men could leave us for them, people adore them based only on their looks. We are threatened, and so most people will seek to knock the awareness of their own beauty out of them before they can use it for evil, or steal our husbands.
Submitted by Confuzitron (user info) at 2005-11-17 10:37:51 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Orgasmatron (user info) at 2005-11-17 10:06:28 (#)
Ranking: 2
And besides...only someone hot as balls could carry the name Orgasmatron.
SHAMONE!
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Well, I guess this means I'm only half as hot as you, -tron
Submitted by loki (user info) at 2005-11-17 10:35:52 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
The responses to this should be amusing.
There is an art to accepting a compliment graciously, perhaps a lost art.
I was always taught the standard smile and say thank you approach. For some reason people naturally tend to be too self-effacing which turns out to be more of a put down to the person offering the compliment.
as in
If I walk up to you and say, "I really like that sweater, it looks good on you" and you respond "this ole thing I got it at a yard sale", what you are really saying is, "you are an idiot for liking this sweater."
Oh sweet jebus, I'm channeling my grandmother.
Don't point, it's rude. It's much nicer to gesture with an open hand. And stop sitting with your knees in different time zones, just because you're wearing pants doesn't mean you shouldn't sit like a lady.
must
snap
out
of
it
Submitted by Teephphah (user info) at 2005-11-17 10:32:16 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Circe - I'm not mad at you. Dood. WTF?! I also wasn't intending to imply that you hated anyone.
What I'm getting at was that my first impression on reading this was, "okay, I get what you're saying, but I'm still wanting to call you a stuck-up bitch for saying publicly that you think you are pretty" (and that would be directed to Pent, not you).
But you are exactly right that I've had many female friends who have been, shall we say, "beauty-challenged," but have been intelligent, dedicated, hard-working or any other assorted wonderful attributes. And ANY ONE of these beauty-challenged women could comfortably list any and all of their possitive attributes so long as they said something along the lines of "I may not be pretty but," before they did so. If they did that, just as you say, they would get the "awwww. That's so great that she's trying to move on with her crappy life" respect that you mentioned.
So why is that? Why the distinction between beauty-challenged and beauty-abled people being able to publicly state their own good qualities?
I really do think it is a very interesting point.
Submitted by Pentameter (user info) at 2005-11-17 10:31:29 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
I stated below that the responses on that post got me thinking. I didn't do it to defend anyone.
I think this is an interesting subject, and apparently, other people do too.
Submitted by Pentameter (user info) at 2005-11-17 10:30:00 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by MyTeeOne (user info) at 2005-11-17 10:17:19 (#)
Ranking: 1
Submitted by TigerLilly (user info) at 2005-11-17 09:45:43 (#)
Ranking: 2
Get ready to be psychoanalyzed.
It blows my mind that people are viewed as vein and conceited if they know they're not ugly. I know I'm not ugly. Like you, I also don't think I am the greatest thing that walked the earth. I know that I am far from that. But god forbid a girl has a little confidence in herself. Now that's just a HORRIBLE thing. Idiots!
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If a woman has a little confidence in themselves, that rocks. It probably makes her more attractive. It's when she becomes vain/cocky that it is a HORRIBLE thing. I assume it the same thing for a guy.
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I agree with you 100%. There is a point where someone can let things get to their head, and that is annoying. No one wants to deal with a conceited person. But what I'm saying is that it's all right to acknowledge the positive things about yourself. Just because you do it doesn't mean that you think you're the end all and the be all.
Submitted by HadToBeDone (user info) at 2005-11-17 10:29:04 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
I still don't see where she was "attacked" and why you felt the need to make this an entire post when all you had to say was:
"It's all right when a thousand people say, you're pretty, you're talented, etc., but when you say, I'm pretty, I'm talented, etc., you're a fucking snot.
This is about being realistic about yourself, as someone pointed out. There are aspects of me that are kick ass and wonderful, but then there are others that I know I lack in.
And I'm all right with that. "
Hey, look at that, you did.
Submitted by TigerLilly (user info) at 2005-11-17 10:26:57 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by MyTeeOne (user info) at 2005-11-17 10:17:19 (#)
Ranking: 1
Submitted by TigerLilly (user info) at 2005-11-17 09:45:43 (#)
Ranking: 2
Get ready to be psychoanalyzed.
It blows my mind that people are viewed as vein and conceited if they know they're not ugly. I know I'm not ugly. Like you, I also don't think I am the greatest thing that walked the earth. I know that I am far from that. But god forbid a girl has a little confidence in herself. Now that's just a HORRIBLE thing. Idiots!
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If a woman has a little confidence in themselves, that rocks. It probably makes her more attractive. It's when she becomes vain/cocky that it is a HORRIBLE thing. I assume it the same thing for a guy.
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Absolutely. But, just because a woman HAS confidence that doesn't make her vain and cocky.
Submitted by Method (user info) at 2005-11-17 10:23:58 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
YOU HAVE SUCH A GREAT ASS
Submitted by Circe (user info) at 2005-11-17 10:23:02 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Teeph - I don't hate anyone for anything and I don't understand why you're mad at me.
Submitted by TheSpook (user info) at 2005-11-17 10:18:41 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Pentameter (user info) at 2005-11-17 09:09:13 (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by TheSpook (user info) at 2005-11-17 09:06:59 (#)
Ranking: 0
Beauty is in the eyes of the beholder.
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This is true, but this is not only about beauty. This is about being able to accept the positive AND negative things about yourself and celebrate them. For instance, I suck at most sports, and I acknowledge that fact.
I knew I should have waited to post this...now I have a billion more ideas for what I could have written.
Oh well.
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It's not that I didn't like your post or point. Everyone has their strengths and you'd be a fool not to know what they are or how to improve upon them.
I just think this is stating the obvious: People love praise.
Submitted by Teephphah (user info) at 2005-11-17 10:17:28 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Circe (user info) at 2005-11-17 10:08:57 (#)
Ranking: 2
It's not really fair to the pretty people. I mean, I know I'm intelligent, I know I can be funny. I know I'm strong. These things, however, don't make me full of myself.
But when someone attractive, like Pent or Tiger, claims their attractiveness as one of their positive qualities, it's suddenly considered arrogance.
My saying "I'm aware that I'm not beautiful, but there are a shitload of other awesome things about me that make me worthy of love" is not considered arrogance. It's considered Look at That Poor Ugly Girl Making the Best of Her Crappy Life.
But Pentameter says openly "I'm aware that I'm not good at sports, but I think I'm pretty so it's okay" and it makes her suddenly arrogant and conceited.
It's just another characteristic, like having blue eyes or brown hair. It doesn't make her arrogant, it makes her realistic.
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That's a REALLY interesting distinction, Circe.
Do you think that you can talk about how smart or funny or strong you are and be sent to the "Look At That Poor Ugly Girl" table where people don't want to look at you, but respect you whereas if Pent or Tiger says "you won't go blind if you look at me" they will be sent to the "uppity bitch" table and universally loathed because we place such a VALUE on attractiveness in Western society?
OR, could there be something in the "fairness" aspect of it. Others have pointed out that physical beauty is basically the luck of the draw, but you can train yourself to be smart or funny, etc. So do we hate pretty people who have the gall to say that they are pretty because it isn't FAIR that they are and we aren't and there is nothing we can do about it?
Consider my noodle baked.
Submitted by MyTeeOne (user info) at 2005-11-17 10:17:19 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
Submitted by TigerLilly (user info) at 2005-11-17 09:45:43 (#)
Ranking: 2
Get ready to be psychoanalyzed.
It blows my mind that people are viewed as vein and conceited if they know they're not ugly. I know I'm not ugly. Like you, I also don't think I am the greatest thing that walked the earth. I know that I am far from that. But god forbid a girl has a little confidence in herself. Now that's just a HORRIBLE thing. Idiots!
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If a woman has a little confidence in themselves, that rocks. It probably makes her more attractive. It's when she becomes vain/cocky that it is a HORRIBLE thing. I assume it the same thing for a guy.
Submitted by Caulaincourt (user info) at 2005-11-17 10:17:13 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
I love you too
Submitted by Berty (user info) at 2005-11-17 10:15:35 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Circe (user info) at 2005-11-17 10:14:28 (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Berty (user info) at 2005-11-17 10:13:04 (#)
Ranking: 2
Yeah but you don't parade those qualities and boast about them. Pentameter doesn't either but that's what being conceited is.
_________
Oh yeah?? Watch me.
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I'm always watching.
Submitted by hollygolitely (user info) at 2005-11-17 10:15:29 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
It's all right when a thousand people say, you're pretty, you're talented, etc., but when you say, I'm pretty, I'm talented, etc., you're a fucking snot.
-------
But what is the point of making such a statement, if you know it's true? Under what conditions would it be necessary to say "I'm pretty and talented", unless you're trying to convince the person you're talking to (thus, meaning you don't actually believe it, anyway). If it's true, they will see it without you pointing it out to them.
Also, accepting or not accepting compliments can sometimes be a cultural thing. The Chinese, for example, are very humble and to be flamboyant about complimenting each other (or accepting those compliments openly) is considered rude.
Submitted by Circe (user info) at 2005-11-17 10:14:28 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Berty (user info) at 2005-11-17 10:13:04 (#)
Ranking: 2
Yeah but you don't parade those qualities and boast about them. Pentameter doesn't either but that's what being conceited is.
_________
Oh yeah?? Watch me.
Submitted by Berty (user info) at 2005-11-17 10:13:04 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
This is what I keep saying!
It's not really fair to the pretty people. I mean, I know I'm intelligent, I know I can be funny. I know I'm strong. These things, however, don't make me full of myself.
But when someone attractive, like Pent or Tiger, claims their attractiveness as one of their positive qualities, it's suddenly considered arrogance.
My saying "I'm aware that I'm not beautiful, but there are a shitload of other awesome things about me that make me worthy of love" is not considered arrogance. It's considered Look at That Poor Ugly Girl Making the Best of Her Crappy Life.
But Pentameter says openly "I'm aware that I'm not good at sports, but I think I'm pretty so it's okay" and it makes her suddenly arrogant and conceited.
It's just another characteristic, like having blue eyes or brown hair. It doesn't make her arrogant, it makes her realistic.
--------
Yeah but you don't parade those qualities and boast about them. Pentameter doesn't either but that's what being conceited is.
Submitted by Circe (user info) at 2005-11-17 10:08:57 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Orgasmatron (user info) at 2005-11-17 09:54:00 (#)
Ranking: 2
I know what I bring to the table, and what I don't.
That doesn't make me full of myself, it makes me realistic.
_________
This is what I keep saying!
It's not really fair to the pretty people. I mean, I know I'm intelligent, I know I can be funny. I know I'm strong. These things, however, don't make me full of myself.
But when someone attractive, like Pent or Tiger, claims their attractiveness as one of their positive qualities, it's suddenly considered arrogance.
My saying "I'm aware that I'm not beautiful, but there are a shitload of other awesome things about me that make me worthy of love" is not considered arrogance. It's considered Look at That Poor Ugly Girl Making the Best of Her Crappy Life.
But Pentameter says openly "I'm aware that I'm not good at sports, but I think I'm pretty so it's okay" and it makes her suddenly arrogant and conceited.
It's just another characteristic, like having blue eyes or brown hair. It doesn't make her arrogant, it makes her realistic.
Submitted by Berty (user info) at 2005-11-17 10:07:30 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Pentameter (user info) at 2005-11-17 10:00:31 (#)
Ranking: 0
When we acknowledge their compliments, Teeph.
It's all right when a thousand people say, you're pretty, you're talented, etc., but when you say, I'm pretty, I'm talented, etc., you're a fucking snot.
This is about being realistic about yourself, as someone pointed out. There are aspects of me that are kick ass and wonderful, but then there are others that I know I lack in.
And I'm all right with that.
-----------
Whoopee doo for you. Telling everyone else is immodest.
Submitted by Orgasmatron (user info) at 2005-11-17 10:06:28 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
And besides...only someone hot as balls could carry the name Orgasmatron.
SHAMONE!
Submitted by MyNameIsTim (user info) at 2005-11-17 10:02:32 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
i understand your point, you got it across well.
I think there is a fine line that we, in striving towards perfection, ought to straddle between humility and confidence. There's a fine line between self deprication and humility, as there is one between confidence and conceit.
They look like this:
..|.......|........|.
SD/H H/C Cfdc/Cnct
aim for the middle.
Submitted by Pentameter (user info) at 2005-11-17 10:00:31 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
When we acknowledge their compliments, Teeph.
It's all right when a thousand people say, you're pretty, you're talented, etc., but when you say, I'm pretty, I'm talented, etc., you're a fucking snot.
This is about being realistic about yourself, as someone pointed out. There are aspects of me that are kick ass and wonderful, but then there are others that I know I lack in.
And I'm all right with that.
Submitted by Mike00295 (user info) at 2005-11-17 09:59:37 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
I am a sexy man whore.
Submitted by AlwaysAnEagle (user info) at 2005-11-17 09:56:29 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Preach iiiiiiiiiit.
Submitted by Orgasmatron (user info) at 2005-11-17 09:54:00 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
It doesn't matter if the quality is appearance, intelligence, athletic ability, and so on. Each individual person has qualities that are worthy of being recognized and acknowledged. Realizing that you have positive qualities does not make you conceited. It makes you a person who has a high level of self-confidence.
---
I think if that was the overall crux of your post you'd be able to avoid a lot of the vanity/arrogance discussion here. Because, really, at the end of the day, this sums it all up.
I know what I bring to the table, and what I don't.
That doesn't make me full of myself, it makes me realistic.
Submitted by hairycoo (user info) at 2005-11-17 09:50:41 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
its hardly an achievement, so being proud of it gives out the impression that being pretty is one of the only things you have going for you.
but then again, I suppose Im pretty proud that I have a big cock
Submitted by Berty (user info) at 2005-11-17 09:49:31 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
If you think you are pretty then it's probably because your life is teh r0xx0rs and more of a feeling of general good feeling than "My God I'm a beautiful bastard".
Come to think of it, I'm guess I'm saying that simply feeling beautiful without appreciating the source of that feeling is a flaw but then I don't expect everyone to be as enlightened as me.
Submitted by Berty (user info) at 2005-11-17 09:46:13 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Teeph, it's an interesting point you've raised there. A lot of older people I listen to talk about how they didn't learn anything useful in school in terms of academic knowledge, but rather that the most important thing was learning how to deal with people, appreciation for pretty pink cunts, etc...
Since I started working in the office I have learnt that most people don't have a very clear idea of what they are doing. They just sort of sit there and deal with whats thrown at them as best they can. If anyone questions their (and I do this too by the way) ignorance, then they throw up a cloud of terminology and the other person throws up their own cloud and they both disapear from the accusation like pantomime ninjas.
What I'm saying is that confidence is a very important thing because it helps one secure pretty pink cunts which in turn boosts self-esteem which then goes on to lead to enhanced quality of life and ultimatly a good job, an even prettier pink cunt and a "fucking big television".
Submitted by TigerLilly (user info) at 2005-11-17 09:45:43 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Get ready to be psychoanalyzed.
It blows my mind that people are viewed as vein and conceited if they know they're not ugly. I know I'm not ugly. Like you, I also don't think I am the greatest thing that walked the earth. I know that I am far from that. But god forbid a girl has a little confidence in herself. Now that's just a HORRIBLE thing. Idiots!
Submitted by Teephphah (user info) at 2005-11-17 09:42:39 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
But then again, I've always had a soft spot in my heart for people who simply loath themselves and who drink to kill the pain of all that nothing inside their hollow souls. But maybe I'm just wacky that way.
Submitted by Ejryuu (user info) at 2005-11-17 09:42:30 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
S'okay, but I've seen you do better. If you put half the effort into this post that you did with your thoughts on the male form, this could've been great. Your point is there and right, but...whatever~
Submitted by TigerLilly (user info) at 2005-11-17 09:39:23 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Right on you 'high on yourself conceited snot'.
Submitted by Teephphah (user info) at 2005-11-17 09:37:00 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Pentameter (user info) at 2005-11-17 09:16:50 (#)
Ranking: 0
The point of this is that we build each other up with compliments only to tear each other down when we acknowledge them.
-----------------------------------------------------------
I don't follow the second half of this comment.
Submitted by Teephphah (user info) at 2005-11-17 09:35:21 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Actually, I'm very conflicted about this.
On the one hand, it could be said that you are rocking the Aristotelian "high-mindedness" where a man knows his own worth and expects others to so as well . . .
On the other, humility is also a rather alluring quality which seems to be in short supply here.
Much is made about the public schools these days giving up on order, discipline, common sense and the actual education of children in favor of ensuring that no matter how ignorant they are - that they feel GOOD about themselves (read: have high self-esteem).
Is this what the end result of that philosophy will look like? (And here I am not attempting to imply that you are ignorant - shamone! - quite the opposite, but the self-esteem thing is what I'm getting at.)
Submitted by electrictoothsyndrome (user info) at 2005-11-17 09:27:53 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
"Since when is it bad to feel good about who you are as a person?"
---------------------------------
Outward appearance doesn't carry half the currency with me that it appears to do for most people. I don't think your appearance should have anything to do with who you are as a person. If it does, then there's probably something wrong...
...but then again, I'm hotter than all of you, so that might explain my viewpoint. :P
Submitted by Berty (user info) at 2005-11-17 09:27:22 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
There is a fine line between appreciating ones own beauty and arrogance. As we all know, Beauty is in the eye of the beholder. Ergo, we can only know if we are beautiful if we are told.
Now, with regards to the correlation between self esteem and appreciating ones qualities then I'm even more unsure. For instance, I know that I am a beautiful, unique and phenomanal man who posesses an uncanny level of sensitivity, calmness and social grace. I don't have high self esteem though because there are many elements that are as yet lacking from my life, few tangible rewards for my persuit of excellence. What we see here is the need for external stimuli.
My point is that you've somehow managed to confuse the fact that you have a wonderful and attentive lover, an online community telling you how great you are, an active social life and (I assume) a good job with some kind of inner strength or perception.
It is these things that enable you to look in the mirror and think 'damn, I look fine'. Credit where credit is due. Where we to take those things away from you then the I believe your view would change.
I do think you are pretty though.
Submitted by wookie (user info) at 2005-11-17 09:27:19 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
If your boss tells you that you did a good job on a project, you should be proud of your hard work. If your friend tells you that they appreciated you staying up with them while they were going through a tough time, you should be glad that you can provide someone comfort when they are feeling low.
If someone tells you that you're attractive, you should be happy that they acknowledge your personal appearance.
All of these compliments are the same thing.
-------------------------------------------------------
I disagree. The other things say something about you as a person, and the effort and investment you're willing to make in yourself and other people. Physical attractiveness, on the other hand, is nothing but the luck of the draw.
Submitted by CHR15 (user info) at 2005-11-17 09:21:18 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Ya lousy bum!
Submitted by Xcuses (user info) at 2005-11-17 09:20:08 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Pentameter (user info) at 2005-11-17 09:16:50 (#)
Ranking: 0
The point of this is that we build each other up with compliments only to tear each other down when we acknowledge them.
--------------
I'm not a tear down kind of guy, but I know what you mean
Submitted by electrictoothsyndrome (user info) at 2005-11-17 09:19:42 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
Ok, that's all well and good...
...now get back in the kitchen and make me dinner bitch! :D
Submitted by Pentameter (user info) at 2005-11-17 09:16:50 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
The point of this is that we build each other up with compliments only to tear each other down when we acknowledge them.
Submitted by Phallic_Cymbals (user info) at 2005-11-17 09:16:41 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
I just got back from a night out with a bunch of models and i'm having big issues with the whole "good looks" thing. I'll get back to you on this tomorrow when my brain isn't so fucking scattered.
good faith +2
Submitted by Xcuses (user info) at 2005-11-17 09:15:27 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
As I get older, I realize how important a woman's personality is in defining their attractiveness. It can take a 7, and bump them up to an 8 just like that with the right attitude and sense of humor.
Submitted by MichaelJackson (user info) at 2005-11-17 09:12:43 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
You rock my world <ah yee hee>
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2005-11-17 09:11:20 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
Well, if it means anything at all, I'd do ya...again.
But what's the point of this post?
never mind...I gotta go play golf instead of work now.
Submitted by leilani (user info) at 2005-11-17 09:09:43 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
by the way, GLALL:
you are charming, stunningly charming, cool, outrageously funny to the ninth degree, cuddly like a bear, brooding, and just absolute sex in a can.
now don't try to deny it.
Submitted by Professional_Peon (user info) at 2005-11-17 09:09:22 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by TheSpook (user info) at 2005-11-17 09:06:59 (#)
Ranking: 0
Beauty is in the eyes of the beholder.
------------------
BEERHOLDER
Eye of the beerholder man!
<rolls eyes>
Submitted by Pentameter (user info) at 2005-11-17 09:09:13 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by TheSpook (user info) at 2005-11-17 09:06:59 (#)
Ranking: 0
Beauty is in the eyes of the beholder.
---------------------
This is true, but this is not only about beauty. This is about being able to accept the positive AND negative things about yourself and celebrate them. For instance, I suck at most sports, and I acknowledge that fact.
I knew I should have waited to post this...now I have a billion more ideas for what I could have written.
Oh well.
Submitted by leilani (user info) at 2005-11-17 09:08:25 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
right on girl.
Submitted by TheSpook (user info) at 2005-11-17 09:06:59 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Beauty is in the eyes of the beholder.
Submitted by redskieslookfake (user info) at 2005-11-17 09:06:41 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
I didn't smile - it was worth reading I guess. I think you could have gone on and been a bit more insightful, and it would have been a much better post. Also, compliments are nice etc - but do you ever feel patronised by a compliment?
Submitted by Circe (user info) at 2005-11-17 09:06:35 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Fabit (user info) at 2005-11-17 08:59:03 (#)
Ranking: 2
Disagreeing is very often somebodys way of saying " I know i'm pretty (or whatever) but my confidence is low so please argue the point and keep saying i'm pretty"
_____________
Disagreeing is the realistic person's way of saying "I know I'm not attractive. Stop feeding me bullshit lines because I'm not a fucking idiot, asshole. I'm well aware of what I am, and what I'm not, and your pathetic brainless efforts to reassure me of something we both know isn't true makes me want to smack you."
Submitted by GodLovesALittleLovin (user info) at 2005-11-17 09:06:29 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
I don't think of myself as god's gift to women, I just like it when every hour or so members of the opposite sex say i'm charming, stunningly charming, cool, outrageously funny to the ninth degree, cuddly like a bear, brooding, and just absolute sex in a can. Actually, they're just guessing because no one can look directly into my eyes without exploding from my greatness. That's modesty.
Submitted by ess-arr (user info) at 2005-11-17 09:04:53 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
no, no problem
Submitted by Xcuses (user info) at 2005-11-17 09:04:48 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
I hear you're the cat's meow...
will you purr a lit'll for me? please
Submitted by Teephphah (user info) at 2005-11-17 09:02:00 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
SHOW US YER TITS YA STUCK UP BITCH.
Submitted by WildcatMcGee (user info) at 2005-11-17 09:00:09 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Meh. Worth Reading is the most appropriate rating I could think of.
Submitted by w_t_a_y_s_t_r_m (user info) at 2005-11-17 08:59:50 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
I'm shit hot too.
But that's a false confidence I use to cover up my otherwise obvious insecurities about myself.
Submitted by Pentameter (user info) at 2005-11-17 08:59:40 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Actually, this has nothing to do with Tiger's post other than the fact that it got the wheels in my head turning.
Besides, I like calling hypocrites out from time to time.
Submitted by Fabit (user info) at 2005-11-17 08:59:03 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
I think this is a much neglected point and you explained it well. I was always taught that if somebody gives you a compliment to simply say "Thank you". Even if you don't agree. It works for everything and it leaves you to feel warm inside that they would say something so nice.
Disagreeing is very often somebodys way of saying " I know i'm pretty (or whatever) but my confidence is low so please argue the point and keep saying i'm pretty"
If that makes sense?
Regardless - good work Ms Pentameter
Submitted by ozzy (user info) at 2005-11-17 08:56:03 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
This reminded me of those nature shows. You know, when the mother bird comes back to the nest and regurgitates something old for the chicks.
You should have this as a reply on Tiger's post.
We could call you Tiger junior. Or Ti-ju.
Submitted by Mike00295 (user info) at 2005-11-17 08:53:45 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Semi-attractive