The ultimate blonde joke (1356 hits)
Category: NoneRating: -1.52 on 34 reviews (Rate this item) (V)
Submitted by <J_D_86.at.hotmail.com> (View user info) at 2003-05-25 19:47:53 EDT
Okay, a blonde was driving down the country highway somewhere in the middle of Iowa. On both sides of the road were corn fields, as far as the eye could see. The blonde was driving along, listening to her blonde music, singing her blonde songs, and just having a good-ole blonde time. All of a sudden, she comes over a hill, and sees a rowboat in the middle of a cornfield to her right. then she notices a blonde in it. "grrr i'm sick of the dumb blondes making us smart blondes look stupid." she thought as she got out of her yellow VW new beetle. then she walked up to the corn, and yelled out loud:
"I'm sick of you dumb blondes making us smart blondes look like a bunch of retards. Why if i knew how to SWIM, i'd come out there and teach you a lesson!"
he he he
User Reviews
Submitted by bob (user info) at 2005-05-08 21:35:33 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
patrick 4 worst eva
Submitted by polyamorousaj (user info) at 2005-01-02 23:39:59 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
No Comment
Submitted by JinkyWilliams (user info) at 2003-09-22 13:18:17 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
"Bravo, an enticing quip from beginning to end. You had the reader on the edge of his seat, teased him with the middle dialogue and then hit an incredible climax with the "swim" element of the tale."
+2 for momanlad...
also +2 to keep this at less-than-"-2" rating.
But in my heart and mind and soul I give it a -2.
--JW
Submitted by PetruchioInLab at 2003-09-22 13:08:38 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Wow, that sucked unbeliavebly
Submitted by sebcharrot (user info) at 2003-09-22 12:59:58 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
this was terrible. what a bunch of lame-ass shit. that's it, ill never be able to hear or a read a blonde joke without killing someone. thankyou.
Submitted by jimbobjoe (user info) at 2003-09-01 09:14:19 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
-2 to make this rating worse
Submitted by Can_Always_Trust_A_Liar (user info) at 2003-08-31 22:45:13 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
this deserves a -2, but i'd like to give Sireen a +2 but i can't bringmyself to give this a positive rating. that was hilarious Sireen
Submitted by Chad_Sexington (user info) at 2003-08-31 22:32:37 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
THIS is the worst-rated post of all time!
Submitted by Mynameisdavid (user info) at 2003-08-31 19:13:46 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
i dont get it... swim.... cornfield.... boat?
Submitted by Insanethemind (user info) at 2003-08-24 20:41:21 EDT (#)
Ranking: -1
I don't hate you.
I do hate this joke, however.
Nothing personal.
(-1)
Submitted by hendrixjrr (user info) at 2003-05-27 12:32:30 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Why do people always say that if someone messes with you it's because they're jealous. Some people just mess with other people because they're obviously superior. If I'm better than someone, I have the right to pick on them. It makes perfect sense.
This had nothing to do with blondes in particular, just a rant.
Jason
Submitted by hendrixjrr (user info) at 2003-05-27 12:30:21 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
I think the blonde jokes were derived from the millions of bleach-blonde airheads without a shred of common sense.
Submitted by loki (user info) at 2003-05-27 12:19:17 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
This one is better, but they are all derived from the basic jealousy that not only do blonds have more fun, blonds ARE more fun. Yo estoy la verdad.
A young ventriloquist is touring the clubs and stops to entertain at a bar. He's going through his usual run of stupid blonde jokes when a big blonde woman in the fourth row stands on her chair and says, "I've heard just about enough of your denigrating blonde jokes, buddy. What makes you think you can stereotype women that way? What does a person's physical attributes have to do with their worth as a human being? It's guys like you who keep women like me from being respected at work and in my community, of reaching my full potential as a person... because you and your kind continue to perpetuate discrimination against not only blondes but also women in general, all in the name of humor."
Flustered, the ventriloquist begins to apologize, when the blonde pipes up,
"You stay out of this mister. I'm talking to that little jerk on your knee."
Submitted by Manfre (user info) at 2003-05-27 11:38:39 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Wow that wasnt even funny the first hundred times I heard it... Ultimate blonde joke indeed. If you were going for the lame Im trying to be funny approach, you succeeded better than anyone else... If you were really trying to be funny then you failed miserably. Kill yourself now before you get even less funny...
Submitted by catscradle (user info) at 2003-05-27 11:22:51 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
This really wasn't good..
Submitted by worksucks (user info) at 2003-05-26 21:36:47 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
what is the fooras part of that?
Submitted by Dogmatic (user info) at 2003-05-26 21:28:52 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
I'll admit, it was almost funny the first time I heard it. Now, however...
Submitted by Blonde_Raven (user info) at 2003-05-26 13:36:18 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
[quote]Oh man that was ROFLMAOFOORAS!!![/quote]
how about instead of making blonde jokes, we make fun of internet geeks who say things like this.
Submitted by momanlad (user info) at 2003-05-26 13:06:48 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Bravo, an enticing quip from beginning to end. You had the reader on the edge of his seat, teased him with the middle dialogue and then hit an incredible climax with the "swim" element of the tale. You fucking nugget, what are you putting this bollocks on here for?
Submitted by jeetkunetony (user info) at 2003-05-26 12:57:16 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Most -2's ever.
Submitted by SantonioSpur (user info) at 2003-05-26 09:48:10 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Haha, you're a failure!
Submitted by jwlmar10 (user info) at 2003-05-26 03:52:32 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
I haven't laughed this hard since my best friends' funeral.
Submitted by ItsAlwaysSeven (user info) at 2003-05-26 03:39:06 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
You should probably kill yourself.
Submitted by bart (user info) at 2003-05-26 03:23:38 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Somebody shoot me.
Submitted by Crash3087 (user info) at 2003-05-25 22:40:34 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Horrible!
Submitted by PeopleAreStrange (user info) at 2003-05-25 22:23:03 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Your stalking made me feel wanted and good about myself in a wholesome, tingly, strictly lesbian way Loki but I'm going to bed now. I'm sorry sex goddess but I cannot provide any more! I have exhausted myself and the buddha has been worn down to his neck.
(Joking). Sorry I would like to have stayed up and chatted as it is not often we are both online at the same time but I have run out of energy, the buddha didn't even get a look-in :o(
Night lass.
Submitted by loki (user info) at 2003-05-25 22:07:46 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
good one PAS, I'm uber stalking you because you are LIVE and kickin' badondakonk ass tonight.
Submitted by PeopleAreStrange (user info) at 2003-05-25 21:55:21 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Wow thanks for emphasising the word 'swim' for me otherwise I never would have understood it.
Submitted by loki (user info) at 2003-05-25 21:10:29 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
maybe you should work on your timing, or subject matter, could be that you're just not funny and should die
Submitted by Sireen (user info) at 2003-05-25 21:00:34 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Oh man that was ROFLMAOFOORAS!!!
How about this one?
A blond was walking down the street when she stopped in front of something. She said hello, but the object didn't respond. A man across the street noticed that the blond was talking to a lamp post, so he shot her and she died.
Submitted by Beer_bong (user info) at 2003-05-25 20:33:54 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Humor is a tricky thing, isn't it?
Submitted by Heyitsmaurine (user info) at 2003-05-25 20:06:58 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
no
Submitted by HeavensWalls (user info) at 2003-05-25 20:00:11 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
It's the weekend? Damn I've lost track of time...
Submitted by antluvdog (user info) at 2003-05-25 19:49:30 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
That was one of the WORST blonde jokes ever. Matter of fact, that was one of the worst JOKES I've ever heard. You people are ruining my weekend.