It's Time For T.M.I = FILTHYASSISTANT (4838 hits)
Category: HumorRating: 1.56 on 117 reviews (Rate this item) (V)
Submitted by Tiger Lilly (View user info) at 2005-11-26 02:43:47 EST
User Reviews
Submitted by Scott_James (user info) at 2006-11-09 20:23:42 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
I just realised she just left out the part where she dismantled my vcr AFTER she put a hammer through my TV.
Submitted by awesome_face (user info) at 2006-11-09 20:15:32 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
These rule, where else am I going to find out if anybody on uber tried to stab somebody.
Submitted by Scott_James (user info) at 2006-11-09 19:49:49 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Fucking thing made me blubber like a little girl.
Submitted by ess-arr (user info) at 2005-11-30 13:43:38 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by Dead_0hi0_Sky (user info) at 2005-11-30 01:24:56 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
do me next.
i meant that in the most non-sexual of ways.
but hey, if you're willing...
Submitted by electrictoothsyndrome (user info) at 2005-11-30 00:05:57 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by The_Yellow_Dart (user info) at 2005-11-26 18:34:57 (#)
Ranking: 2
Apparently, one in five people in the world are Chinese. And there are five people in my family, so it must be one of them. It's either my mom or my dad, or maybe my older brother Calvin or my younger brother Ho-Chin. But I'm pretty sure it's Calvin.
--------------------------
That's the first thing on uber that I've laughed out loud to in days.
Fuckin' hilarious. Yellow Dart is is climbing that ladder of favorite users in my ever-changing, makeshift, mental list.
Submitted by Pentameter (user info) at 2005-11-28 18:52:45 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Cool.
Submitted by FilthyAssistant (user info) at 2005-11-28 18:34:08 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by TigerLilly (user info) at 2005-11-28 18:22:26 (#)
Ranking: 0
I should have asked this question, so i am going to now.
Filthy, what color are your eyes? They look blue?
===
Yeah, they're blue.
Submitted by TigerLilly (user info) at 2005-11-28 18:22:26 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
I should have asked this question, so i am going to now.
Filthy, what color are your eyes? They look blue?
Submitted by matnotharry (user info) at 2005-11-28 18:06:24 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by scourge (user info) at 2005-11-28 10:12:43 (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Average_Dan (user info) at 2005-11-28 07:43:49 (#)
Ranking: 2
FA is hot.
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Indeed she is
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yea i agree
Submitted by MyTeeOne (user info) at 2005-11-28 17:49:27 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
I never said you weren't being honest filthy. I believe every word. I said you didn't say what you really meant. It's possible to be honest and still not say what you mean. But what the hell do I know? It's hard to read people over the internet.
Submitted by Merlina (user info) at 2005-11-28 17:35:42 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
hey! just outside London and no show at Ubercon?????
what?! Filthy girl... we have to talk !
Submitted by FilthyAssistant (user info) at 2005-11-28 17:06:54 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by MyTeeOne (user info) at 2005-11-28 16:02:08 (#)
Ranking: 1
Is it just me filthy, or did you not say what you really meant?
===
Count how many times on this post I stress that I'm being honest - that should give you a major clue that I'm trying to hide something. Nobody goes to the pain of pointing that out so consistently unless they want people to believe it.
Submitted by MyTeeOne (user info) at 2005-11-28 16:02:08 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
Is it just me filthy, or did you not say what you really meant?
Submitted by JonnyX (user info) at 2005-11-28 13:27:42 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Phallic_Cymbals (user info) at 2005-11-27 04:32:16 (#)
Ranking: 2
i got halfway through this before slapping my keyboard and saying to the screen "ANSWER THE FUCKING QUESTION! All this 'i originally read the question as' and 'oh i thought you meant' and 'ok im going to go off on a totally irrelevant tangent here' was pissing me off. Hardcore. +2 because that's not the interviewer's fault.
-----
y'know, I felt the same way - she'd make cracks like "you can say the word 'fuck', y'know", and then forget to answer the question.
Submitted by nitty34 (user info) at 2005-11-28 12:02:40 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by Brdn_Nkd (user info) at 2005-11-28 11:24:00 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by scourge (user info) at 2005-11-28 10:12:43 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Average_Dan (user info) at 2005-11-28 07:43:49 (#)
Ranking: 2
FA is hot.
----------
Indeed she is.
Submitted by rayrayshanaynay (user info) at 2005-11-28 09:57:02 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
I don't know. I thought this could've been a lot worse, so I wasn't disappointed.
Submitted by Jeanneee (user info) at 2005-11-28 09:11:36 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
I feel special because Katie used one of my questions.
Submitted by Berty (user info) at 2005-11-28 08:06:07 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
I've forgotton what I was meant to be reviewing.
Submitted by Average_Dan (user info) at 2005-11-28 07:43:49 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
FA is hot.
Submitted by thecaes (user info) at 2005-11-28 07:26:36 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by ozzy (user info) at 2005-11-28 05:22:56 (#)
Ranking: 2
I get the impression Filthy wanted to tell all, but the questions weren't condusive to it. Which sucks because this line of questioning worked pretty well for the previous 2 interviewees.
************************
I'd say you're way off base, but what do I know? I'm just a caveman. I fell into some ice and was later thawed out by your scientists. Your world frightens and confuses me.
Submitted by zoobie2000 (user info) at 2005-11-28 07:19:57 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
boring
Submitted by ozzy (user info) at 2005-11-28 05:24:40 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
BTW Filthy is quite the foxy little Brit. I'd do her but I reckon she'd drool all over my pillows.
Submitted by ozzy (user info) at 2005-11-28 05:22:56 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
I get the impression Filthy wanted to tell all, but the questions weren't condusive to it. Which sucks because this line of questioning worked pretty well for the previous 2 interviewees.
The question in the reviews which got her to reveal the part about looking after her mother was good though.
Submitted by FilthyAssistant (user info) at 2005-11-28 03:32:33 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Xcuses (user info) at 2005-11-27 17:53:12 (#)
Ranking: 2
Everyone has one secret that they just can't tell anyone. For some reason, they have to keep it all to themselves to the day they die. I know I have several. So the question to you is, why are you afraid to tell anyone your deepest darkest secret? More importantly, how comfortable are you sharing it with us, mostly strangers throughout the entire world?
===
I don't have a secret that at least one other person doesn't know - a combination of some very good friends and a psychiatrist will do that to you. In a way I've already shared what I would consider to be my deepest and darkest with you lot by writing about it at some stage last year - it's a lot easier to tell a stranger a secret than it is to tell someone whose opinion you actually care about.
You say you have several - I'd suggest it's time to start thinking about unburdoning yourself.
Submitted by rad1101 (user info) at 2005-11-27 23:00:21 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
i got pwned
Submitted by munkeypants (user info) at 2005-11-27 20:33:12 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by thecaes (user info) at 2005-11-27 07:49:28 (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by The_Yellow_Dart (user info) at 2005-11-26 18:34:57 (#)
Ranking: 2
Apparently, one in five people in the world are Chinese. And there are five people in my family, so it must be one of them. It's either my mom or my dad, or maybe my older brother Calvin or my younger brother Ho-Chin. But I'm pretty sure it's Calvin.
*******************
This review is hilarious.
Submitted by zakalwe (user info) at 2005-11-27 19:23:55 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
I wuv u fiwthyathithtant.
mawwy me?
Submitted by Xcuses (user info) at 2005-11-27 17:53:12 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Actually I was really keen to see if somebody could come up with a question so close to the bone that I'd refuse to answer it - a sort of test of my own limits, if you will. Nobody wants to play though, so I'll take my psychological ball and go home. I guess digging through somebody elses skeletons isn't as interesting as I find it.
-----------------
This sounded too tempting to not try so here it goes...Everyone has one secret that they just can't tell anyone. For some reason, they have to keep it all to themselves to the day they die. I know I have several. So the question to you is, why are you afraid to tell anyone your deepest darkest secret? More importantly, how comfortable are you sharing it with us, mostly strangers throughout the entire world?
Submitted by hairycoo (user info) at 2005-11-27 17:38:25 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
she can call me '101'
Submitted by MANICMOTHER (user info) at 2005-11-27 15:46:26 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Filthy is my hero.
Submitted by LadyPlural (user info) at 2005-11-27 13:38:02 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by FilthyAssistant (user info) at 2005-11-27 13:34:27 (#)
Ranking: 0
Given that I promised to be honest: "What are your credit card details?"
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Ah-ha! The joke is on you! Because you see, I do not have a credit card! BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA.
---------------------------
I'll take caul's advice and try to condense my answer into as close to a sentence as I can get. It was a mixture of curiosity, total disregard for my own wellbeing and an intense desire to just switch the world off for a while. I decided to quit because I woke up one sunday feeling absolutely and completely subhuman - it wasn't a specific sensation that I could pinpoint, just everything about me felt 'WRONG', like I was an infection or something that didn't belong in my own skin.
---------------------------
Wow. Good answer. And somewhat scurry.
Submitted by FilthyAssistant (user info) at 2005-11-27 13:34:27 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by LadyPlural (user info) at 2005-11-27 13:24:56 (#)
Ranking: 2
What's a question that we haven't asked you, but that you think that we should?
===
Given that I promised to be honest: "What are your credit card details?"
===
And on another uncomfortably personal note, what led you to become a 'junkie', and what lead you to decide that you had to quit?
===
I'll take caul's advice and try to condense my answer into as close to a sentence as I can get. It was a mixture of curiosity, total disregard for my own wellbeing and an intense desire to just switch the world off for a while. I decided to quit because I woke up one sunday feeling absolutely and completely subhuman - it wasn't a specific sensation that I could pinpoint, just everything about me felt 'WRONG', like I was an infection or something that didn't belong in my own skin.
Submitted by LadyPlural (user info) at 2005-11-27 13:24:56 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Miss Filthy: What's a question that we haven't asked you, but that you think that we should?
And on another uncomfortably personal note, what led you to become a 'junkie', and what lead you to decide that you had to quit?
Submitted by DCWoody (user info) at 2005-11-27 13:01:44 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
You are a weird and arousing person, I get the impression that both impressions are intentional.
Submitted by Bigmike (user info) at 2005-11-27 12:29:30 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Thank you for answering my question Filthy. It's a good answer and it gives insight into you personally. I appreciate that I got a little slice of you in the answer..
Submitted by Caulaincourt (user info) at 2005-11-27 12:00:22 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
One sentence questions, ten thousand words replies.
Interviewees shouldn't try so hard to appear interesting.
Too much blending kills colors.
Submitted by FilthyAssistant (user info) at 2005-11-27 11:55:05 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by DCWoody (user info) at 2005-11-27 11:22:20 (#)
Ranking: 0
You sound like you'd really like to spend a few hours talking to someone about life, Filthy.
===
Nah, I've spent many, many hours talking to people about life dude - the only thing left on this chest is a tattoo of a bolivian unicyclist and some clothespegs.
Actually I was really keen to see if somebody could come up with a question so close to the bone that I'd refuse to answer it - a sort of test of my own limits, if you will. Nobody wants to play though, so I'll take my psychological ball and go home. I guess digging through somebody elses skeletons isn't as interesting as I find it.
Submitted by DCWoody (user info) at 2005-11-27 11:22:20 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
You sound like you'd really like to spend a few hours talking to someone about life, Filthy.
Try writing out everything you want to say and sending it to a made up email address or mine (dcwoody3000.at.yahoo.com), or put it in one of those email time capsules and send it to that person who'll be you ten years from now.
It sounds like you have a lot to get of your chest anyway, and I think thats the first time I've ever used that phrase not as an innuendo.
Only a zero, because this series was a good premise that has turned out rather boring.
Submitted by Xcuses (user info) at 2005-11-27 10:38:21 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Oh noes- FA figured me out
Must seek therapy, or change my internet persona...
Submitted by missedthepoint (user info) at 2005-11-27 07:58:30 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
FA ----- +2 for you mi amigo
Submitted by thecaes (user info) at 2005-11-27 07:49:28 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by The_Yellow_Dart (user info) at 2005-11-26 18:34:57 (#)
Ranking: 2
Apparently, one in five people in the world are Chinese. And there are five people in my family, so it must be one of them. It's either my mom or my dad, or maybe my older brother Calvin or my younger brother Ho-Chin. But I'm pretty sure it's Calvin.
*******************
This review is hilarious.
Submitted by FilthyAssistant (user info) at 2005-11-27 06:52:21 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Xcuses (user info) at 2005-11-27 05:34:46 (#)
Ranking: 2
Tiger, I think these are the hard hitting questions people are searching for.
===
You think a question about sex toys is "hard hitting"? Dude, come on. It's mindless titilation.
If, in a situation where we are almost guarenteed to get an honest answer, all we can think of to ask is "Tee hee, what do you think about sex? Snort giggle blush" then it says something kinda sad about us.
Submitted by Xcuses (user info) at 2005-11-27 05:34:46 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by FilthyAssistant (user info) at 2005-11-26 16:33:01 (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Xcuses (user info) at 2005-11-26 16:23:10 (#)
Ranking: 0
Are sex toys a good replacement for men?
===
In terms of reaching a speedy, efficient and knee-trembling climax, sex toys do the job. If a girl can't bring herself to a howling, bed-clawing orgasm quicker, easier and better than a man can, she probably hasn't spent enough time wanking.
Speed and efficiency are not what it's all about though. Sex toys do not laugh with you when you fall off the bed and accidentally crush one of the midget onlookers. They can't kiss slowly up your neck in that way that makes you want to meow and they're not very good at talking dirty.
So yes, sex toys are a good replacement for men, but not in the areas that actually count.
---------------
Tiger, I think these are the hard hitting questions people are searching for.
This was an awesome answer by the way.
Filthy quickly jumps up to one of my favorites.
Submitted by Phallic_Cymbals (user info) at 2005-11-27 04:32:16 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
i got halfway through this before slapping my keyboard and saying to the screen "ANSWER THE FUCKING QUESTION! All this 'i originally read the question as' and 'oh i thought you meant' and 'ok im going to go off on a totally irrelevant tangent here' was pissing me off. Hardcore. +2 because that's not the interviewer's fault.
Submitted by joedaddy (user info) at 2005-11-27 04:15:00 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
.
Submitted by Sphagnum (user info) at 2005-11-27 02:30:15 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
+2 - Gorgeous Redhead.
Submitted by dangerdude (user info) at 2005-11-27 01:53:23 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
needs more nakedness
Submitted by Spooner (user info) at 2005-11-27 00:17:02 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
User-specific questions would be nice.
Submitted by TigerLilly (user info) at 2005-11-26 22:04:04 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by rad1101 (user info) at 2005-11-26 17:20:20 (#)
Ranking: 0
that being said, Im done reviewing these posts unless something interesting actually happens
=============================================================================================
Is that a threat or a promis? Because either way, I won't loose sleep over you not commenting on these posts. M'kay.
Submitted by Lisa (user info) at 2005-11-26 21:13:48 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
I love everyone.
Submitted by rad1101 (user info) at 2005-11-26 19:08:54 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by FilthyAssistant (user info) at 2005-11-26 17:36:36 (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by rad1101 (user info) at 2005-11-26 17:20:20 (#)
Ranking: 0
and you and bigmike I think hit on the only way to save this series from total suck.
followup questions. Thats what is severely lacking. the interview subjects should hold little Uber press conferences and take questions based on the interview given.
that being said, Im done reviewing these posts unless something interesting actually happens.
====
So, to sum up "You're all shit even though I can't be bothered to do any better. Be more interesting or I won't grace you plebians with my esteemed presence"
Does that about cover it?
=========================
only if you have an inferiority complex. not my meaning at all.
Submitted by The_Yellow_Dart (user info) at 2005-11-26 18:34:57 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Apparently, one in five people in the world are Chinese. And there are five people in my family, so it must be one of them. It's either my mom or my dad, or maybe my older brother Calvin or my younger brother Ho-Chin. But I'm pretty sure it's Calvin.
Submitted by PokeyPecker (user info) at 2005-11-26 18:17:13 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Fuck.
*British accent
*Is the British accent....
Now I have to give it a +2
Submitted by PokeyPecker (user info) at 2005-11-26 18:09:58 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
I'd do ya. But only because you have what appears to be red hair. And I'd love to hear what a British broad sounds like in the sack. Is the British as sexy during sex as it is while buying a can of peaches?
Inquiring minds want to know.
And also the pet thing.
And also because you say you were a junkie. Junkies are awesome in the sack. They know how to work it for that money. They make you hollah for that dollah.
Submitted by FilthyAssistant (user info) at 2005-11-26 17:36:36 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by rad1101 (user info) at 2005-11-26 17:20:20 (#)
Ranking: 0
and you and bigmike I think hit on the only way to save this series from total suck.
followup questions. Thats what is severely lacking. the interview subjects should hold little Uber press conferences and take questions based on the interview given.
that being said, Im done reviewing these posts unless something interesting actually happens.
====
So, to sum up "You're all shit even though I can't be bothered to do any better. Be more interesting or I won't grace you plebians with my esteemed presence"
Does that about cover it?
Submitted by rad1101 (user info) at 2005-11-26 17:20:20 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by FilthyAssistant (user info) at 2005-11-26 12:35:08 (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by rad1101 (user info) at 2005-11-26 08:29:27 (#)
Ranking: 0
you are all kidding, right?
the questions are inane, the answers are vapid and offensive.
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Ok rad, what would you ask me? Gimme a non-inane question and I'll do my best to be neither vapid nor offensive.
-----------------------------------------
I lied about being vapid. sorry.
and you werent offensive enough.
and you and bigmike I think hit on the only way to save this series from total suck.
followup questions. Thats what is severely lacking. the interview subjects should hold little Uber press conferences and take questions based on the interview given.
that being said, Im done reviewing these posts unless something interesting actually happens.
Submitted by FilthyAssistant (user info) at 2005-11-26 16:33:01 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Xcuses (user info) at 2005-11-26 16:23:10 (#)
Ranking: 0
Are sex toys a good replacement for men?
===
In terms of reaching a speedy, efficient and knee-trembling climax, sex toys do the job. If a girl can't bring herself to a howling, bed-clawing orgasm quicker, easier and better than a man can, she probably hasn't spent enough time wanking.
Speed and efficiency are not what it's all about though. Sex toys do not laugh with you when you fall off the bed and accidentally crush one of the midget onlookers. They can't kiss slowly up your neck in that way that makes you want to meow and they're not very good at talking dirty.
So yes, sex toys are a good replacement for men, but not in the areas that actually count.
Submitted by LadyPlural (user info) at 2005-11-26 16:32:27 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Asian parrots? Why Asian ones? ARE YOU BEING RASCIST?
Well, if you get lost and somehow end up in Florida, let me know! We can tour lakes whilst riding on the backs of alligators.
Trust me, it's awesome.
Submitted by Xcuses (user info) at 2005-11-26 16:23:10 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
I'll say it again: if there's something you're curious about that wasn't covered, ask it yourself. What do you consider to be a risque question, dave?
-----------------
I have a question....
Are sex toys a good replacement for men?
Submitted by FilthyAssistant (user info) at 2005-11-26 16:20:24 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by LadyPlural (user info) at 2005-11-26 16:03:29 (#)
Ranking: 2
Where are you going to be while you're in the US?
===
Indiana. No big roadtrips this time - I'm skint. I'll be bringing parrots. Lots and lots of asian parrots.
Submitted by FilthyAssistant (user info) at 2005-11-26 16:17:59 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Davros (user info) at 2005-11-26 16:08:08 (#)
Ranking: 2
Given that Filthy's internet "persona" is of a somewhat risque nature, I would have liked to see some more risque questions. As the girl said herself her only promise is to be honest in her answers.
It is not that I didn't enjoy the piece, as my rating shows, just that when I heard that FA was being interviewed, I was expecting the questions to be based on her Uber self, which would mean courting controversy in certain areas.
===
I'll say it again: if there's something you're curious about that wasn't covered, ask it yourself. What do you consider to be a risque question, dave?
Submitted by Davros (user info) at 2005-11-26 16:08:08 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by thecaes (user info) at 2005-11-26 14:56:32 (#)
Ranking: 2
My only suggestion to Tiger is to maybe tailor the questions more to the subject (e.g. not ask someone who's significant other is ON Uber who else on Uber they'd like to pork), but that's hard to do without knowing something about the interviewee in the first place...which is part of the whole point!!
Good work, Tiger.
--------------------
That was my point in my earlier review Caeser.
Given that Filthy's internet "persona" is of a somewhat risque nature, I would have liked to see some more risque questions. As the girl said herself her only promise is to be honest in her answers.
It is not that I didn't enjoy the piece, as my rating shows, just that when I heard that FA was being interviewed, I was expecting the questions to be based on her Uber self, which would mean courting controversy in certain areas.
I am pretty sure that my answers, should I ever be asked, will be of remarkably less interest, but I will be honest.
-Dave
Submitted by LadyPlural (user info) at 2005-11-26 16:03:29 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
"But then, I'm not a semi-homicidal British strumpet with an encroaching Alsatian fetish."
So true. So very, tragically true. We could use more of those in the world.
This is by far my favorite interview so far. Where are you going to be while you're in the US?
Submitted by Xcuses (user info) at 2005-11-26 16:02:22 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
I need a filthy assistant....or a naughty one
Submitted by krissi (user info) at 2005-11-26 15:58:43 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Another good interview, Katie. I really like this series.
Submitted by thecaes (user info) at 2005-11-26 14:56:32 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
A word about the questions. Everyone seems to have something to say about Tigerlilly's line of questioning, and so hey...me too.
These surveys aren't easy, and no matter what TL does, she's not going to be able to please everyone. Some of you want to see huge philosophical debates, other want pure entertainment. Right now I think she has a good mix of thoughtful/scandalous/funny questions. A lot has to do with the person being interviewed and the direction they want to take it in. If TL asked me the same questions she did Filthy, I guaran-damn-tee the answers would be nothing alike.
But then, I'm not a semi-homicidal British strumpet with an encroaching Alsatian fetish.
My only suggestion to Tiger is to maybe tailor the questions more to the subject (e.g. not ask someone who's significant other is ON Uber who else on Uber they'd like to pork), but that's hard to do without knowing something about the interviewee in the first place...which is part of the whole point!!
Good work, Tiger.
Submitted by thecaes (user info) at 2005-11-26 14:49:08 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by FilthyAssistant (user info) at 2005-11-26 08:00:06 (#)
Ranking: 0
Don't gush, caesar. I know it smells great but is it, ultimately, just an eraser.
And no, you can't have it.
*****************
Selfish cunt.
Submitted by electrictoothsyndrome (user info) at 2005-11-26 14:44:59 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by FilthyAssistant (user info) at 2005-11-26 13:59:49 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Bigmike (user info) at 2005-11-26 13:30:15 (#)
Ranking: 2
Tell us about a situation in your past that, if you had done it differently then, would have changed your life forever, quite possibly putting you in a very different place than you are right now.
====
There is one thing that has absolutely shaped the course of my life and who, where and what I am today.
One day when I was twelve, my dad called me out into the garden and told me he was going away for a while. Something had obviously been 'not right' in the house for some time, but I didn't quite understand what was going on. He left, without even saying goodbye to my brother, and my mum was absolutely broken in half. Looking back on it with adult eyes, he had spent two years systematically grinding her down until she was a needy and desperate shell, and when he finally went, she lost it and had quite a serious breakdown.
She had no friends and no family in the area, and my sixteen year old brother was going through teenage stuff that meant he was never around. So, without ever making a conscious decision other than "I don't want her to go away too" I did everything I could to look after her. I spent two years sleeping in her bed, effectively on suicide watch.
She had no-one else to talk to, and so she told me everything, no matter how inappropriate it may have been for twelve year old ears. She showed me pictures of my dad getting a blowjob off the woman he'd run away with - no kid needs to see that. I effectively became her mother. When I'd find her crying over old photographs of him I would take them away from her and rip them up - anything to stop her getting herself more depressed. I couldn't even tell you with any accuracy what my dad actually looked like - moustache and glasses, that's about it.
I kept it all a huge secret and, looking back, I was a fool for thinking I could handle it. You can't hold other people together at that age for that length of time without eventually falling apart yourself. I believe my life would be very different had I told someone what was happening so she could have got some professional help.
Submitted by Circe (user info) at 2005-11-26 13:45:44 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
No problem. It's nearly 3am here and I'm so wiped that I'm still giggling at "Busty McBoobtit" as though it's the cleverest damn thing I've ever said.
Regrettably, it probably is.
Submitted by Professional_Peon (user info) at 2005-11-26 13:41:06 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Aw shucks Circe... Thanks
I was just teasing though. I needed something cute to say to go along with my +2, and being that I just woke up... couldn't think of one.
I still can't.
Submitted by Circe (user info) at 2005-11-26 13:31:02 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Professional_Peon (user info) at 2005-11-26 13:20:09 (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Circe (user info) at 2005-11-26 05:26:54 (#)
Ranking: 2
One of the few women that doesn't make my teeth itch from time to time.
-----------------
Hey... don't talk about me like I'm not here.
____________
Simmer down, Busty McBoobtit.
I like you just fine, too.
Actually, most women on uber are pretty awesome - it's the ones in the real world I want to lobotomize.
Submitted by Bigmike (user info) at 2005-11-26 13:30:15 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Tell us about a situation in your past that, if you had done it differently then, would have changed your life forever, quite possibly putting you in a very different place than you are right now.
I'm not stealing your thunder TL, you are doing great and I love reading these. Just curious I guess.
Submitted by tinactin (user info) at 2005-11-26 13:22:32 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
The first one of these things that is remotely interesting
Submitted by Foonbo (user info) at 2005-11-26 13:21:41 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Rachel Leigh Cook.
Submitted by Professional_Peon (user info) at 2005-11-26 13:20:09 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Circe (user info) at 2005-11-26 05:26:54 (#)
Ranking: 2
One of the few women that doesn't make my teeth itch from time to time.
-----------------
Hey... don't talk about me like I'm not here.
Submitted by FilthyAssistant (user info) at 2005-11-26 13:18:26 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by HadToBeDone (user info) at 2005-11-26 12:53:27 (#)
Ranking: 0
So I guess this one is less inane because of the subject matter?
===
You're putting words in my mouth dude - I haven't defended either TL's questions or my responses anywhere on this post. My first thought when I read this back was "sweet jesus, I need to get a life"
But it is what it is. The only agreement I made going into this was that I would answer honestly, and the truth isn't always stealing tanks and storming Paris.
There are a couple of untapped depths here though, so if you've got a challenging question that you think will make it more interesting, fire away.
Submitted by Amy (user info) at 2005-11-26 13:14:03 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
there should be a second part or something
Submitted by Bigmike (user info) at 2005-11-26 13:06:37 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
Not too bad. I kind of thought it would be a little more interesting though. Might be the questions, I don't know.
Submitted by fried-green-potatoes (user info) at 2005-11-26 13:01:58 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
Technical analyst as in Edwards & McGee-type chartist?
Submitted by HadToBeDone (user info) at 2005-11-26 12:53:27 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
You know, Filthy, you had no trouble shooting insults about both the questions and the answers on past editions of this little series. I think my favorite was 'This interview is like watching Vin Diesal getting anally raped by a yak whilst iraqi insurgents throw live penguins strapped with c4 at the camera compared to its hugely well recieved and mind-bendingly inane "I couldn't live without my GAP jeans" predecessor.'
So I guess this one is less inane because of the subject matter?
Submitted by FilthyAssistant (user info) at 2005-11-26 12:38:52 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by CaptainThorns (user info) at 2005-11-26 10:47:00 (#)
Ranking: 2
Hey Filthy - I'll be in Desford 14Jan - 28Jan on business. How 'bouts snagging Merlina and the others for another Ubercon?
===
It's looking extremely likely that I'll be in the states for the end of january/start of feb, but if you do get anything organised let me know (uberfilthy.at.gmail.com) and I'll see if I can make it.
Submitted by FilthyAssistant (user info) at 2005-11-26 12:35:08 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by rad1101 (user info) at 2005-11-26 08:29:27 (#)
Ranking: 0
you are all kidding, right?
the questions are inane, the answers are vapid and offensive.
===
Ok rad, what would you ask me? Gimme a non-inane question and I'll do my best to be neither vapid nor offensive.
Submitted by Orgasmatron (user info) at 2005-11-26 12:34:09 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
This stimulated my mind AND my bathing suit area.
Submitted by The_Yellow_Dart (user info) at 2005-11-26 12:18:15 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
The desert island answer was the exact thing I always say to people who ask me that. Perfect response if I say so myself.
Submitted by mikethescottish (user info) at 2005-11-26 11:40:25 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Interesting reading.
Submitted by Spam (user info) at 2005-11-26 11:20:08 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
Submitted by Davros (user info) at 2005-11-26 09:27:42 (#)
Ranking: 2
I thought the questions were a little lightweight when questioning someone of Filthy's personality.
I would have asked slightly more controversial stuff.
However,
"...like the majority of men on Uber, I prefer the cock"
had me creased up with laughter.
-Dave
Submitted by CaptainThorns (user info) at 2005-11-26 10:49:10 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Filthy, addendum to last rate - if interested, drop me a line at dsvmusic at yahoo.
Submitted by CaptainThorns (user info) at 2005-11-26 10:47:00 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Hey Filthy - I'll be in Desford 14Jan - 28Jan on business. How 'bouts snagging Merlina and the others for another Ubercon?
Oh, and nice interview responses, too.
Submitted by HadToBeDone (user info) at 2005-11-26 09:55:06 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
Filthy said it herself. Stop pussyfooting around and just fucking ask what you want to know.
Submitted by PigOnLifeSupport (user info) at 2005-11-26 09:53:32 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by Davros (user info) at 2005-11-26 09:27:42 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
I thought the questions were a little lightweight when questioning someone of Filthy's personality.
I would have asked slightly more controversial stuff.
However,
"...like the majority of men on Uber, I prefer the cock"
had me creased up with laughter.
-Dave
Submitted by The_taste_of_Monkeys (user info) at 2005-11-26 08:42:46 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Hmmm, fairly honest and amusing responses for once.
Submitted by rad1101 (user info) at 2005-11-26 08:36:47 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
here here
whatever
Submitted by rad1101 (user info) at 2005-11-26 08:36:36 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
hear hear
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2005-11-26 08:32:42 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
Semi-interesting, undersexed, underachieving, cantankerous young sluts are a dime a dozen.
Submitted by rad1101 (user info) at 2005-11-26 08:30:21 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Ms. assistant does look like my sister-in-law, however.
Submitted by rad1101 (user info) at 2005-11-26 08:29:27 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
you are all kidding, right?
the questions are inane, the answers are vapid and offensive.
I get more entertainment value out of reading US weekly in the dark.
Submitted by redskieslookfake (user info) at 2005-11-26 08:09:56 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Interesting and Filthy has pretty eyes.
Submitted by FilthyAssistant (user info) at 2005-11-26 08:00:06 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by thecaes (user info) at 2005-11-26 07:24:30 (#)
Ranking: 2
I'm really in awe of you, Filthy. You make me feel...humble.
===
Don't gush, caesar. I know it smells great but is it, ultimately, just an eraser.
And no, you can't have it.
Submitted by thecaes (user info) at 2005-11-26 07:24:30 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
I'm really in awe of you, Filthy. You make me feel...humble.
...and a little randy.
I could go on and on about this but I think I'll leave it there.
Submitted by zakalwe (user info) at 2005-11-26 05:50:22 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Soley_Trinity (user info) at 2005-11-26 03:54:31 (#)
Ranking: 2
Because she's honest, beautiful and likes it raw.
Submitted by Circe (user info) at 2005-11-26 05:26:54 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
One of the few women that doesn't make my teeth itch from time to time.
Also, it's ok, Filthy - I know you'd do me, you know you'd do me... Brad knows you'd do me... there's no need to be ashamed, honeybun pumpkinbutt sugarthighs.
Submitted by Method (user info) at 2005-11-26 05:04:56 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Hey, you can't interview the same person twice, that's not fair to the others.
Submitted by a_reader (user info) at 2005-11-26 05:04:07 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Soley_Trinity (user info) at 2005-11-26 03:54:31 (#)
Ranking: 2
Because she's raw, honest, and beautiful.
Submitted by c1ndy (user info) at 2005-11-26 05:01:00 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Method (user info) at 2005-11-26 04:58:33 (#)
Ranking: 2
It's just me and the british folk up now, ain't it
---
and Rad, and ETS. Like a hardcore.
Submitted by Method (user info) at 2005-11-26 04:58:33 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
It's just me and the british folk up now, ain't it
Submitted by Avals (user info) at 2005-11-26 04:51:43 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Best one yet!
FilthyAssistant r0x0rz my b0x0rz ... erm, briefs.
Submitted by c1ndy (user info) at 2005-11-26 04:43:54 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by rad1101 (user info) at 2005-11-26 04:03:39 (#)
Ranking: -2
Quick, over there!
What's that?
The Fonz? On Waterskis? Wearing his leather?
What's that he's doing near that ramp?
OMG HE'S JUMPING THE SHARK!!!
-----
Rad! Such bitterness. You'd love it if she did you.
(don't do him though, do me! do me!)
Submitted by leilani (user info) at 2005-11-26 04:09:10 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
best one so far maybe. i really enjoyed this. FA, hope to see more of you on uber!!!!1 and tiger keep up the good work-- hope you had a great thanksgiving :)
although i do have to say... i love my dog like he's a person. but that means i NEVER dress him in stupid outfits :)
Submitted by rad1101 (user info) at 2005-11-26 04:03:39 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
Quick, over there!
What's that?
The Fonz? On Waterskis? Wearing his leather?
What's that he's doing near that ramp?
OMG HE'S JUMPING THE SHARK!!!
Submitted by Soley_Trinity (user info) at 2005-11-26 03:54:31 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Because she's raw, honest, and beautiful.
Submitted by c1ndy (user info) at 2005-11-26 03:28:14 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
I like it because the pet peeve is actually about pets.
Submitted by morontian (user info) at 2005-11-26 03:05:00 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
No comment. That seems nice and safe. Yeah, I don't think I could get into any trouble for that.
No comment.