Ways to piss off people you work with... (1588 hits)
Category: Humor -> Dirty HumorRating: 0.16 on 14 reviews (Rate this item) (V)
Submitted by James G <wuhoa.at.hotmail.com> (View user info) at 2003-05-26 21:41:59 EDT
Well, I'm trying to share ways you can piss off your co-workers.. Just for laughs, of course............ Yeah, anyways, I've seen on dirty-proverbs that stuff like going into the bathroom after and going into a stall next to someone, pretend to jack off, spit in your hand, then pour some of that sweet n low sugar shit into the spit and throwing it next to the dude's foot, then getting a piece of toilet paper and wipe it up and say "I'm sorry." Anyone got anything else you could do inside/outside the bathroom to piss people off?
User Reviews
Submitted by Scurvy <scurvydawg.at.hotmail.com> at 2004-06-10 17:58:37 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Slip a roofie into two people's coffee, then strip them naked and leave them on top of each other in a conference room where there's going to be a company-wide meeting. Hilarity ensues. Note: Works best with members of the same sex.
Submitted by Mitch Cumstein <almighty_sarlacc.at.hotmail.com> at 2004-06-10 17:53:22 EDT (#)
Ranking: -1
These jokes are ghey. I am kewl! OMGWTFBBQ!
Submitted by tuesdaydelay (user info) at 2003-12-20 07:18:45 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
Doing that spit thing would make them think you're a complete tool anyway. You may as well just jack off into your hand and through it next to their foot.
Submitted by K.M (user info) at 2003-05-27 18:02:10 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
yeah thats right it was maxim i remember now.
no need to get all pissy
Submitted by Manfre (user info) at 2003-05-27 16:48:46 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
You could shoot them... Im pretty sure thatd piss them off. Or in the least itd annoy them a little. Like just shoot em in the foot...
Submitted by ChrisDotCom (user info) at 2003-05-27 16:00:52 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
BTW KM...you read that in MAXIM...
Submitted by K.M (user info) at 2003-05-27 14:33:25 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
if you have good chairs, this is fun.
1)buy a frozen shrimp ring
2) pull off the top of a computer chair
3) empty shrimp ring into pole connecting two parts of chairs.
it will smell very bad. chances are they will just exchange it for another chair anyway.
this is not my idea. i heard it from somewhere but i can not remember where.
Submitted by Crash3087 (user info) at 2003-05-27 14:21:05 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Never tried this, but it just came to mind.
Take a cologne bottle, fill it with jack daniels or some kind of alcohol with a distinct smell. Spray it on random people...like on there back so they don't notice. Maybe someone higher up will smell it thinking they came into work drunk or something. Getting other people in trouble is fun...
Submitted by loki (user info) at 2003-05-27 11:33:07 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
finger nail clipping always sets me off.
Submitted by Manfre (user info) at 2003-05-27 11:00:52 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I was in the bathroom when I read this and did the flushing thing. The guy next to me asked me if I was alright. I just said in a strained voice "Yeah... I. I think Ill be fine..."
Submitted by tartpumper (user info) at 2003-05-27 06:44:47 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
http://www.laughnet.net/archive/career/workdump.htm
Submitted by crisko (user info) at 2003-05-27 06:05:34 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
No Comment
Submitted by Fabish (user info) at 2003-05-26 21:50:36 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
This one will get them every time.
1) When you and a coworker go to get your coffee, take a good swig of it and just spray it all over his shirt. After that you can either A)complain about something that is in the coffee or B) tell him you thought he had on that new Docker shirt and wanted to try it out.
2) When you and another worker are in the bathroom, and you are in side-by-side stalls you can do whatever kind of grunt or groan you think is appropriate. Either agonizing pain or wonderful pleasure, it's you choice. Then flush the toilet 7 times in like 3 seconds. It is horribly terrifying when you don't know why the other person is flushing so fast and so often.
3) Whilst you are tieing your shoe, ask a fellow employee that you have to tell him a secret. The moment he starts to get near you A) lurch at him as fast as you can and send a knee into his trachea, chest, stomach, or genitals B) give him a massive head-butt to the chin or C) pop up and then come crashing back down full bore with an elbow to the base if the neck.
No but seriously, try the toilet flushing multiple times. Someone did that to me while I was waiting to earn 20 bucks to shit in a urinal and it about threw me off my game. Him just being there made me nervous, but then he just kept flushing an flushing.
Submitted by Beer_bong (user info) at 2003-05-26 21:45:54 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Throw a DD bra under the door of a stall and sing "Born Free" in a really high voice.