Hereditary Murder - Part 3 (409 hits)
Category: NoneRating: 1.83 on 6 reviews (Rate this item) (V)
Submitted by Da MagnificAnt Dyldo <lordofduct.at.gmail.com> (View user info) at 2005-11-30 02:43:55 EST
I don't seem to be getting many readers. This isn't going to detour me from writing more of it though; I am actually enjoying this. I would like more comments though. I thank supadupapupa for his input. I wanted to know, is that name from the HBO tv series for kids? I don't remember the name right now, but I used to watch it all the time. It has games like "Psycho Math" and "Distraction News"... there is also a game called "SupaDupaPupaScupa" where you have to guess if certain facts about different animals are true or false.
Part 1 - http://www.ubersite.com/m/79905
Part 2 - http://www.ubersite.com/m/79987
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Danny's seventeen year old brother Richard is a bit of a vagabond. He doesn't have a designated home and instead travels from family member to family member taking residence for a short period of time with them depending on the lie he handed them that week. This week he may have a job at a restaurant and is trying to clean up off of drugs so he stays at his mother's. Next week he might be high again and stay at his cousin's house. Then he'll enroll in Narcotics Anonymous and stay with his uncle's or grandparents' house. The last time Danny saw Richard was when he got kicked out of his mom's for the twentieth time. Unannounced to Danny, Richard had been kicked out for bringing home a stolen gun which had been used in a murder. Richard did not know this, but his father did and informed Danny's mother of the problem. After dropping the gun in the river Richard was sent out of the house not to be seen again.
Danny washed his face in the lavatory before exiting and stumbling out to the living room. He clicked the large knob on the television and rolled the large dial over to VHF and then spun the small dial to 61 stopping half a click between it and 60. The fuzz rolled out a loud twine demanding Danny to turn it down before his mother woke; a few tugs at the tinfoil on top of the TV and an infomercial buzzed onto screen. It must be at least three in the morning. Danny backed up away from the TV and watched as the fuzz got worse with every step he took. Too lazy to care, he sat on the couch.
The front door rattled a bit. A cute giggle rolled underneath the crack of the door drawing Danny's attention. A loud slam against the door and then everything went silent. Finally a click of the key and the door swung open. Richard fell through the door onto the ground with a cute but a little chunky girl in his arm. She wore her slight extra weight well and didn't seem like the kind of girl who'd shove herself in clothes too small, but still a whore none the less. Danny obviously recognized Crystal, being the step daughter of his father's cousin; she used to baby-sit him years earlier when he lived with his father. Coming from a small town like Canton, this is usually the case with any girl you meet. Danny now lived a few towns over, but his older brother mostly stayed around Canton.
Danny watched them stumble back to their feet. Richard swigged a large gulp from the bottle of Jack in his hand and meandered towards the hallway ignoring Danny sitting on the couch. Crystal grabbed the bottle from Richard and went to swing it back when she caught eyes with Danny; she attempted a wave that looked more like a rooster impersonation.
"How'd you get here; I thought you sold your car for drugs?" Danny introduced his presence to Richard. Danny had heard that a few weeks earlier Richard traded his birthday present, a Ford Fiesta, for an 8-ball; he had actually only received a Twinkie more then a gram.
Richard snarled at Danny and walked down the hall and into Danny's bedroom. Danny just rolled over on the couch and curled up with the knitted blanket draped across the back of it. He figured he must be sleeping here now after he heard the banging of his own bed against the wall.
Danny stared off at the television as time passed. It could have been five minutes or five hours, he wasn't sure, until the banging stopped. Now the house was rumbling with the snoring of his older brother. He could hear Crystal in there sigh because Richard had passed out afterward. She stumbled out of the room and slid down the hall gliding her body across the wall getting God knows what all over it. She bounced off the corner and hopped up and down in the middle of living room.
"Danny! Long time no see! What are you now; eleven?" Her breasts bounced about and Danny did whatever he could to ignore her naked body.
"Yeah..." He turned back towards the TV trying not to show interest in her nudity, "I turn twelve in two weeks."
"Growing up so fast. Soon I'm going to have to worry about two Dircman boys flirting with me."
"I think I already have to worry about it now." Danny grumbled a little, yet he had a little smile on his face. Crystal walked over to the couch and set on Danny's legs. She ignored the knee in her ass and continued on with her conversation.
"Oh isn't that sweet, you've got attitude just like your brother."
"Yeah..."
"But you're cuter." She began to lie down beside Danny. Danny pushed himself down into the cracks of the cushion to hide his unwarranted erection. The creature has a mind of its own, but what would you expect from an eleven year old boy.
"Am I going to get to sleep in my own bed tonight?"
"I highly doubt that'll be happening. I don't even think I'll get to sleep in your bed." She yawned a bit and smacked her lips. She nuzzled her head into Danny's neck and passed out.
"Great..." Danny grumbled a bit and then noticed his knee was irritated a bit. He reached down to scratch and found a bit of spunk on it. "Awww, fucking nasty!" He wiped his knee clean and attempted to sleep.
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The sun broke through the window blinds when Danny was suddenly awoken, "Crystal! What the hell are you doing to my son?" His mother stood over him screaming.
"Uh oh..." Danny struggled out of his dry lips.
Crystal smacked her lips a bit and mumbled a few words as she attempted to peel open her eyes, "ummm, huh, my what is I am in here?" She rolled stark naked on to the floor. "Oh, ouch, I said where what am I?"
"Danny you get up and ready for school. I need to have a talk with you brother."
User Reviews
Submitted by Ditka (user info) at 2006-01-09 08:48:40 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by ripple (user info) at 2005-12-19 15:33:18 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
that drawing was possibly the greatest thing i have ever seen. did you do it?
i like the way the story's progressing. its fabulous.
Submitted by MandaPanda (user info) at 2005-12-03 23:31:27 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Pretty good.. I was kind of expecting a bigger reaction from the Mom, though.
Submitted by MavisMing (user info) at 2005-11-30 05:41:59 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
No Comment
Submitted by supadupapupa (user info) at 2005-11-30 03:16:12 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Much, much better...
I really liked this. I'm waiting for the build up and, hopefully, the murder! Good job! The flow in this was excellent, and I liked your description of Crystal. She seemed a very believable character to me.
BTW my name is a joke, I saw a lot of people with serious-like names on websites and I thought it would be better to have a name that was a complete joke. What could be better than supadupapupaScupa?
Submitted by wardy (user info) at 2005-11-30 02:51:08 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment