My First Post - Creativity at its peak!!! (655 hits)
Category: NoneRating: -1.1 on 21 reviews (Rate this item) (V)
Submitted by Dr. Gonzo (View user info) at 2005-12-02 21:32:09 EST
Just my luck...
time to make my first post,
yet all my ideas suck,
this one more than most.
Maybe a scan of my ass would be super,
or I could post a photo of my dick,
what the fuck, this is uber,
everyone is sick!
Perhaps a post to cause strife,
urbane's pussy would do the deed!
I could scar people for life,
while making their eyes bleed.
Nah, I will just add a picture of some boob
and write some stupid rhyme
so hurry up all,
and leave me my -2DIE NOOB!!!!!
User Reviews
Submitted by The_Cyst_Master (user info) at 2005-12-03 16:27:38 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
You fucking suck more.
Submitted by The_Cyst_Master (user info) at 2005-12-03 16:27:24 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
I fucking suck.
Submitted by The_Cyst_Master (user info) at 2005-12-03 16:27:05 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
You fucking suck.
Submitted by matnotharry (user info) at 2005-12-03 12:12:15 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
Submitted by Phallic_Cymbals (user info) at 2005-12-02 21:50:10 (#)
Ranking: 0
Some cigars are not hand rolled.
-----------------------------
Hahaha, i got it.
Oh, the meter is buggered and you included 'first post' (don't)
Submitted by redskieslookfake (user info) at 2005-12-03 12:02:31 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
Not Suitable For Work
Not Suitable For Those Who Are Eating.
Submitted by skrapmetal (user info) at 2005-12-03 11:54:37 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
You know what for you know why.
Submitted by XFile (user info) at 2005-12-03 09:58:35 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
MOM?!?
Submitted by Orgasmatron (user info) at 2005-12-02 23:44:56 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
We'll see how that goes.
Submitted by Dr.Gonzo (user info) at 2005-12-02 23:38:03 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
See, this is what happens when I stop smoking pot for too long! Hopefully tomorrow this problem will be rectified!
Submitted by podium (user info) at 2005-12-02 22:41:04 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
I bet she can suck a cock like no other..
Submitted by ghola (user info) at 2005-12-02 22:37:00 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
I haven't had much time to spend on uber as of late-
studying for finals and such.
But I'm happy I got to -2 this.
Submitted by BeavisChrist (user info) at 2005-12-02 22:33:45 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
Terrible.
Submitted by Orgasmatron (user info) at 2005-12-02 22:29:49 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
This...this sucks the root, it does.
For so, so many reasons.
It brings about a rage in me, just like the changing seasons.
I can't believe you'd blow your horn and praise your spark, creative,
You'd do us all a favor if you paid a tribe of natives
To shoot you full of stone-tipp'd arrows,
Scalp your bleeding head,
Then chop your dick off with an axe
And rape you till you're dead.
Deal with my linkwhorage, insect.
Only I'm not linking the post, I'm pasting that mofo.
"When Teabag Last in Mouth-Hole Loom'd"
1
When teabag last in mouth-hole loom'd
And the great bop bag early droop'd in your mouth in the night,
I moan'd - and yet shall moan with ever-growing glee.
O tonguebathing spring! O-face sure to me you bring;
Teabag looming perennial, and drooping nuts in the west,
And thought of her I love.
2
O powerful, softly op'ning lips!
O teabagging night! O moody, tonguey night!
O great sac disappear'd! O the red lips that hide the balls!
O cruel hands that stroke me powerless! O helpless soul of me!
O harsh surrounding mouth that will not free my soul!
3
On the night-stand fronting an old headboard, near the silk sheets draping,
Sits the bottle, tall-standing, with throat-numbing promises in printed black,
With many a pointed dose, swallowing, numbing, for the numbed throat I love,
With every dose a miracle...as from this bottle on the night-stand,
With delicate drops and doses, and throat-numbing promises in printed black,
Her throat, with its quieted gag reflex, I plow.
4
In the mouth, in secluded recesses,
A shy and hidden hangdown warbles a song.
Solitary, the mule,
The cyclops, withdrawn to himself, avoiding the vagina,
Sings by himself a song.
Song of the op'ning throat!
Death's outlet song of life - (for well, dear love, I know
If thou wast not gifted to suck, thou would'st surely die.)
5
Over your breasts in the night, that land, amid cities,
That lane, that path through the woods, (where lately the nipples peep'd from the ground, spotting
the pink debris;)
Amid the mountains in the fields each side of the lane - passing the endless fields;
Passing the pink-tipp'd bayhales, every shadow from their nips in the pink field
uprising;
Passing the apple-bottom curves of pink and tan in your orchards;
Carrying a blind man to where it shall find its sight,
Night and day journeys a hangdown.
6
Hangdown that passes through this lane, this street,
Through day and night, with great white clouds painting the land,
With the string of unloos'd pearls, with the necklace draped in white,
With the show of the Face itself, as of money-shott'd women, kneeling,
With hair long and winding, and the flambeaus of the night,
With the countless positions fit - with the pliant bend of legs, and shaved bare box,
With the willing depot, the arriving hangdown, and the knotted faces,
With bellows through the night, with the two voices rising strong and steady;
With the two knotted o-faces, and the bellows, and the sauce pour'd round the hangdown,
The dim-lit bedroom shows my shuddering organ - which amid you will journey,
With the swaying, swaying balls' perpetual swing;
Here! hangdown that slowly thrusts,
She gives you her spring of lilac.
7
(Not for you, for one, alone;
Dildos and ben-wahs and hangdowns all I bring;
For soon comes the morning - thus would I paint a picture on you, O sane and sacred Filipino prostitute.
All over the boquet of your face,
O prostitute! I cover you over with roses and early lilies;
But mostly and now the jism that blooms in my bag,
Copious, I break, I break the sprigs from your bush;
With loaded gun I come, pouring for you,
For you, and the gun fires all for you, O prostitute.)
Submitted by jgreening (user info) at 2005-12-02 21:58:26 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
*yawn*
Submitted by Lisa (user info) at 2005-12-02 21:51:50 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
Quit knocking Val, it's so maddeningly old. Like you assholes can afford to be selective about vaginas.
Submitted by knucklesnelson (user info) at 2005-12-02 21:51:42 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Posting flashy pics of your mom will get you no where around here mister!
Submitted by Phallic_Cymbals (user info) at 2005-12-02 21:50:10 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Some cigars are not hand rolled.
Submitted by Unabonger (user info) at 2005-12-02 21:43:58 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
dude stop postin gpics of your mom on teh intarweb or you'll get grounded
oooooooooooooooo i'm teeellllllling!
Submitted by Blinkish (user info) at 2005-12-02 21:39:24 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
Dammit!
Submitted by Blinkish (user info) at 2005-12-02 21:39:03 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Wow .....
Submitted by PokeyPecker (user info) at 2005-12-02 21:38:08 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
-2 die n00b