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Good news, bad news and.....good news (1123 hits)

Category: None

Rating: 1.6 on 39 reviews (Rate this item) (V)
Labels:

Submitted by Xcuses (View user info) at 2005-12-09 10:48:40 EST


Alright you fuckers, this includes you badass. I thought I would share what's been happening the last couple of days. As some of you know, I have been searching for new employment, in addition to wasting some time on here, and running my ass off cause there's too many hours in the day to just sit around. Alas- I have found my new home, where I will begin work in the beginning of Jan. Now I can do what I wanted to do, relax for the rest of the month and chill out. For those of you uninterested in following my life (and really, that should be most people), this would be a good time to stop reading. I encourage the -2die comments, hopefully witty comments will ensue and possibly even a poem from Orgasmatron if I'm so lucky.

Yesterday I spent a couple hours at this new employer. The day before they had their x-mas party and I got to hear all about it. Not only that, but I even got to see pictures. After about a dozen or so I started getting a little bored. Something about looking at pictures of people I have no idea who they are doesn't give me wood (unless their naked hot woman). Finally I had to say something. I chimed in with, "Where are the exciting photos"....to which I got the response, "Oh, I think you might like this one". She then starts searching for the 'naughty' photo. I was starting to wonder what my new colleague would consider risque.

She clicks on the picture and my eyes widen a bit. I move my face a little closer to the monitor to see this girl, with an awesome body, bending over the table at the restaurant while her equally attractive co-worker is spanking her. Her ass looked incredible and I'm sure a smile was planted on my face. She turns around, smiles and says, 'what do you think?'
Without missing a beat I responded, "I think we're gonna get a long just fine"

It wasn't the most racey photo I had ever seen, but her comfort level of showing a practical stranger who she was about to work with this picture, with admiration in her eyes, was a nice touch. She mentioned her favorite activity is drinking and really, that can only lead to bad, evil things as I see it.

The bad news is I won't be lurking nearly as much as I used to, which is.... the good news for most of you. I will still check out some of my favorite posters from time to time, probably run into a Loki post or thirty. There still will be TMI......the Bart interview to check out, a circe post, badass- whose coming to the ski lodge to get fucked up and laugh at the rejects who didn't attend the Ubercon post. I'm sure I'll catch a Manicmother post......err, I mean, if she ever wrote one again. I look forward to all of these things, just not as frequent.

In light of my career move, learning about some of the people I will be working with, and their hobby of 'drinking after work' I only have one question...

Does anyone know a good sexual harrassment attorney?

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User Reviews


Submitted by loki (user info) at 2005-12-13 17:16:28 EST (#)
Ranking: 2

You found another job quickly damn. When I was out of work, it took me four fucking months and I had dial up so I didn't want to go online during the day because I was afraid of missing that all important interview phone call.

I went to a Christmas party at a job once that I was starting in January. The one person there I knew was a total bitch to me. Later I found out that it was most likely because she was banging one of the managers and his wife was there. Then lucky fucking me, I ended up on an assignment with the two of them so yea that was a good time.


Submitted by Xcuses (user info) at 2005-12-12 09:16:40 EST (#)
Ranking: 0

I don't know how retired people do it. I'll have to move to warmer weather when I retire so I can play golf.

Submitted by Magic_Monkey (user info) at 2005-12-12 07:16:57 EST (#)
Ranking: 2

Submitted by HighVoltage900 (user info) at 2005-12-09 11:21:42 (#)
Ranking: 0

"Does anyone know a good sexual harrassment attorney?"

Just use my time patented excuse.

"I swear your Honor, she MADE me donkey punch her, chain her wrists to her ankles, shove hard-boiled eggs into her ass, skull fuck her ear, slap her across the face with a 13-inch dildo, invite three friends over and gang-screw her till she passed out, then spew my man-chowder all inside her nostrils! I mean shit, SHE RAPED ME!!!"


-----------

Best review ever !!

Submitted by Zoidberg (user info) at 2005-12-12 02:04:42 EST (#)
Ranking: 0

Submitted by badassmofo (user info) at 2005-12-10 07:05:38 (#)
Ranking: 2

Submitted by Zoidberg (user info) at 2005-12-09 13:19:34 (#)
Ranking: -2

www.livejournal.com

lets all your "friends" know whats up with your life, great stuff


http://www.ubersite.com/m/78599

==============

irony



My post was at least mildly entertaining. This was just one big circle jerk for all the little uber boys and girls who have made internet friendships.

*awwwwwwwwwwwwwwww*



Submitted by Unabonger (user info) at 2005-12-10 18:57:49 EST (#)
Ranking: 2

What if the hokey pokey IS what it's all about?

Submitted by iradney (user info) at 2005-12-10 18:10:18 EST (#)
Ranking: 2

Heya X *smooch* how you doin hot stuff?

Submitted by munkeypants (user info) at 2005-12-10 17:10:34 EST (#)
Ranking: 2

Congrats

Submitted by NewGuy08 (user info) at 2005-12-10 15:38:37 EST (#)
Ranking: 0

you should take a picture of your new co-worker and post it

Submitted by MandaPanda (user info) at 2005-12-10 13:09:08 EST (#)
Ranking: 2

No Comment

Submitted by CHR15 (user info) at 2005-12-10 11:04:25 EST (#)
Ranking: 2

Interesting... I must have scrolled whilst still in the rank this item box...

Submitted by CHR15 (user info) at 2005-12-10 10:55:48 EST (#)
Ranking: -2

Don't we all?

Submitted by Xcuses (user info) at 2005-12-10 10:49:22 EST (#)
Ranking: 0

I think I need to get fucked up tonight

Submitted by matnotharry (user info) at 2005-12-10 09:10:28 EST (#)
Ranking: 1

yea man

Submitted by rad1101 (user info) at 2005-12-10 08:11:50 EST (#)
Ranking: 2

GOOD ON YOU!

Submitted by badassmofo (user info) at 2005-12-10 07:05:38 EST (#)
Ranking: 2

Submitted by Zoidberg (user info) at 2005-12-09 13:19:34 (#)
Ranking: -2

www.livejournal.com

lets all your "friends" know whats up with your life, great stuff


http://www.ubersite.com/m/78599

==============

irony

==============

good luck Xcuses, polesmoker

Submitted by forensicgirl3 (user info) at 2005-12-09 23:18:45 EST (#)
Ranking: 2

Good luck to you, Sweets! Just think of the fun that's ahead of you when your hot co-worker has a birthday!

Birthday spankings here you come.

Submitted by Xcuses (user info) at 2005-12-09 19:28:45 EST (#)
Ranking: 0

Submitted by Zoidberg (user info) at 2005-12-09 13:19:34 (#)
Ranking: -2

www.livejournal.com

lets all your "friends" know whats up with your life, great stuff
--------

you could do alot better than this

Submitted by CaptainThorns (user info) at 2005-12-09 14:26:41 EST (#)
Ranking: 1

Lionel Hutz

Submitted by CHR15 (user info) at 2005-12-09 13:26:52 EST (#)
Ranking: 2

I was just joking but I think Zoidberg is really serious. Is he, I'm not sure, well, whatever he's obviously jammed another man's penis into his anus. Did it feel good Zoidberg?

Submitted by Zoidberg (user info) at 2005-12-09 13:19:34 EST (#)
Ranking: -2

www.livejournal.com

lets all your "friends" know whats up with your life, great stuff

Submitted by CHR15 (user info) at 2005-12-09 13:12:08 EST (#)
Ranking: 2

JesuS, is this guy full of himself.. This isn't a blog buddy.

Submitted by Professional_Peon (user info) at 2005-12-09 11:51:40 EST (#)
Ranking: 2

Submitted by RyuFu (user info) at 2005-12-09 11:22:19 (#)
Ranking: 2

AUTO +2 MY BIRTHDAY...

Uhh, and good luck...?
------------------
NO NO NO!

IT'S MY BIRTHDAY AND I'M NOT SHARING!

Auto +2

Submitted by RamJetMax (user info) at 2005-12-09 11:39:25 EST (#)
Ranking: 2

No Comment

Submitted by Orgasmatron (user info) at 2005-12-09 11:29:34 EST (#)
Ranking: 2

With nog and hint of rum, imported, down'd,
The intern's inhibitions dissolve. Drawn
To dancing without a floor or beat, round
Twin bumps of taut ass a woody do spawn.
Beg her brace herself with tonéd arms, long,
Firmed from giving handjobs here at barside,
Watch her arch her back - spy the high-raised thong,
Her ass would make Mandela love Apartheid.
Beg her spread her legs, long, to shoulder width:
"Arch your feet, dear love, remove your heels,"
Hammer on her buttcakes like a swordsmith
But flatten not the curve, lest bubble yield.
A mistress plied with drinks and public spanking
Will surely give your dangle quite the cranking.


Submitted by RyuFu (user info) at 2005-12-09 11:22:19 EST (#)
Ranking: 2

AUTO +2 MY BIRTHDAY...

Uhh, and good luck...?

Submitted by HighVoltage900 (user info) at 2005-12-09 11:21:42 EST (#)
Ranking: 0

"Does anyone know a good sexual harrassment attorney?"

Just use my time patented excuse.

"I swear your Honor, she MADE me donkey punch her, chain her wrists to her ankles, shove hard-boiled eggs into her ass, skull fuck her ear, slap her across the face with a 13-inch dildo, invite three friends over and gang-screw her till she passed out, then spew my man-chowder all inside her nostrils! I mean shit, SHE RAPED ME!!!"

Submitted by Berty (user info) at 2005-12-09 11:18:16 EST (#)
Ranking: 2

Submitted by BLITZKREIG_BOB (user info) at 2005-12-09 11:09:01 (#)
Ranking: 2

"Does anyone know a good sexual harrassment attorney?"

Teeph
-------------------------------------
Is he though? I mean what part of law does he actually practice?

I just automatically assumed he was an ambulance chaser or something.

Submitted by Brdn_Nkd (user info) at 2005-12-09 11:11:23 EST (#)
Ranking: 2

Submitted by Berty (user info) at 2005-12-09 10:55:24 (#)
Ranking: 2

Goodbye Xcuses. I hope your new friends get as much pleasure out of you as we did. At least until you discard them for the next exciting thing that comes along, leaving them to feel like a used tissue sweating fluid into the carpet of despair.

Fuck you man, I hope you and your laydeee friend get raped by Eric Rice and Electro.




that is funny funny shit.

Submitted by BLITZKREIG_BOB (user info) at 2005-12-09 11:09:01 EST (#)
Ranking: 2

"Does anyone know a good sexual harrassment attorney?"

Teeph



Submitted by Xcuses (user info) at 2005-12-09 11:03:30 EST (#)
Ranking: 0

more good news. I have another two weeks to totally waste away and annoy everyone on this site. From now on, this day will be forever known as black friday.

Submitted by wardy (user info) at 2005-12-09 11:02:56 EST (#)
Ranking: 2

cool dude.

Submitted by nitty34 (user info) at 2005-12-09 10:59:12 EST (#)
Ranking: 2

Congrats on the new job.

Good luck.

Submitted by ess-arr (user info) at 2005-12-09 10:59:02 EST (#)
Ranking: 2

good luck with the new job. and have some fun...

Submitted by Xcuses (user info) at 2005-12-09 10:57:04 EST (#)
Ranking: 2

I'm going to have to check out this site just for Berty comments alone

Submitted by Berty (user info) at 2005-12-09 10:55:24 EST (#)
Ranking: 2

Goodbye Xcuses. I hope your new friends get as much pleasure out of you as we did. At least until you discard them for the next exciting thing that comes along, leaving them to feel like a used tissue sweating fluid into the carpet of despair.

Fuck you man, I hope you and your laydeee friend get raped by Eric Rice and Electro.

Submitted by ghola (user info) at 2005-12-09 10:54:01 EST (#)
Ranking: 1

hopefully witty comments will ensue and possibly even a poem from Orgasmatron if I'm so lucky.
------------------------------------
what more could anyone hope for?

Submitted by w_t_a_y_s_t_r_m (user info) at 2005-12-09 10:53:18 EST (#)
Ranking: 2

Sounds like you got christmas a few weeks early there.

Fingers crossed you aren't going to be the one in the picture, bent over the desk that they show the new employees next year

Submitted by Jeanneee (user info) at 2005-12-09 10:52:04 EST (#)
Ranking: 2

Submitted by Jeanneee (user info) at 2005-10-17 16:22:23 (#)
Ranking: 2

Congratulations. Don't fuck it up.


Submitted by Xcuses (user info) at 2005-12-09 10:49:04 EST (#)
Ranking: -2

-2die motherfucker


Dasher, Dancer ... Prancer ... Nixon, Comet, Cupid ... Donna Dixon.

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Simpsons Roasting on an Open Fire