It's Hard To Be A Jew On Christmas (and 364 other days a year too) (3735 hits)
Category: PoliticsRating: 1.48 on 121 reviews (Rate this item) (V)
Submitted by Razor <Jeremy_21117.at.hotmail.com> (View user info) at 2005-12-16 15:01:02 EST
Being a Jew in America is tricky.
I'm not talking about being an orthodox wear-the-beanie-go-home-from-work-early-on-Friday Jew. Those guys have it relatively easy. While they are obviously very different from the dominant culture in America, they tend to live in tight-knit communities, making them feel at home, and what's more, they BELIEVE.
No, what's tricky is being a Jew like me. It's going to take a few paragraphs to explain what I mean by that, but I can't really make my point without it.
My type of Jew really hasn't been to synagouge more than once or twice since they got Bar-Mitzvahed (probably because the other kids in private school were doing it and your parents didn't want you to miss out on the payday).
You know about six words of Yiddish that you picked up from your grandparents, words like meshugana (nuts) fagela (fag) schvartza (nigger) and shiksa (no real translation into English, it means "non-jew" in the same way kike means "jew" in English). Growing up, I had no idea those were bad words... I used them all the time until I found out that they were meant as insults.
If you're a jew like me, you probably eat pork constantly, see your extended family on Passover but can't really remember more than two of the "four questions", say "Jesus Christ!" when you're angry or startled, and get vaguely embarrassed when you're talking to a real Jew and they refer to something like Simchat Torah, which you remember from Sunday school but can't for the life of you bring to mind what the holiday is about.
There's an entirely new Jewish culture that has developed in America over the last two hundred years, and it continues to morph. My generation in particular has become pretty non religious, and our baby boomer parents, who without a doubt grew up more religious than us, for the most part seem to be giving up on their Judaism as they hit their 50s. Some cultural points have stuck with us... we tend to be very well educated and pretty well off, but truth be told we have more in common with the average American Christian than we do with Orthodox Jews... except the whole Jesus thing.
We have, for the most part, lost our religion. We still in general culturally identify with something that could be called "Jewish", but what is that, anyway? I look at Orthodox Jews, and I know the "jewish" I identify with is not them or anything like them. Really, the 21st century modern agnostic Jew is this sort of new culture adrift in the wind. We're a gigantic mass of walking contradictions that puts up a Christmas tree and calls it a Channukah bush when we really don't give a shit about Channukah either.
What makes it so hard for Jews like me, is that it doesn't matter how much we're not like traditional Jews, and it doesn't matter how much we don't identify with the Orthodox jews. As far as the rest of the world is concerned, we're as Jewish as Jewish can be. And that makes us a bit subconsciously nervous. See, the problem is that every so often, people rise up and start wiping out the Jews, or if not actually massacaring them, then they do things like force them to convert or confiscate their property, and they generally don't stop to make distinctions between different types of Jews.
I know, I know, not in America, right? Not after the Holocaust. Humanity has learned its lessons.
Allow me to respond as a history major: Give me a fucking break. Mankind hasn't learned much of anything, and when we do it doesn't last very long. By the time I'm old and people who lived during World War II are nothing but something old people remember, the way people who lived before World War I are now, humanity will have long forgotten any lessons it learned from the Holocaust. Look no further than the genocides that went on in the 1990s, the genocides that are going on RIGHT NOW TODAY, and you'll see humanity hasn't learned a thing.
Which is why we're nervous and we get spastic pretty fast. I mean, look at what's happening these days. We've got the lunatic president of Iran denying the Holocaust, Mel Gibson putting out his antisemetic propaganda to the tune of a $370,782,930 DOMESTIC IN AMERICA gross (that's #10 on the ALL TIME list people), the new Christian movement that's gained so much steam since W got elected, the ten commandments in the courthouse (a Jewish invention, ha!) and guys like Bill O'Reilly complaining about the "War on Christmas" on a show that continues to get more and more popular.
People threatening to boycott stores that don't put up "Merry Christmas" looks to people like me like the tip of a very scary iceberg. For those of you who blow that off immediately, here's guessing that you live on one of the coasts. There's a whole section of America between the mountain ranges that scares the shit out of me... they seem like we're one economic depression or oil crisis away from words like "jewish liberal establishment" getting thrown around seriously.
And if you think we got rid of all that shit starting in the 1960s, why don't you go ask a black person if he thinks racism, real honest racism, is dead in this country. Better yet, think about all the white people you know. I can't count how many times I've encountered shit like being told to keep my eyes on a new black coworker, and when I ask why (because I can't resist making people squirm in situations like that), I get answered something like "Well, you know, he's NEW."
It has a lot to do with why Jon Stewart is practically my hero. He's a Jew like me, and he's not afraid to get on television and point out that Christmas being a federal holiday violates the American tradition of separation of church and state.
Why even bother? Why put up a fuss about it at all? What harm is there in little things like that?
Because the little things add up. Intolerance, beat down by a generation of baby boomers who have sold out everything that mattered to them in their youth, is on the march, and most young people simply don't give a shit. In fact, complain about it and you're likely to get a reaction like "Don't come at me with that PC bullshit, take Kwanzaa and stuff it up your ass while you're bent over your Wiccan altar."
If you're lucky. The more common reaction to any complaint about anything that affects Jewish people is "You're only complaining about that because you're Jewish."
How come when Kofi Annan talks about the AIDS crisis in Africa, nobody says "You're only complaining because you're black"?
Remember the guy who didn't want the words "under god" in the pledge of allegiance? Remember those "liberal activist judges" that upheld his opinion? In the midst of all the eye rolling and Christian chest pounding by everyone from the President to the cowards in the Senate to the couch cowboys of Ubersite, we lost sight of the fact that the guy HAD A POINT.
This shit doesn't belong in our government, and there's a huge segment of the population that it scares. Most of us just won't come out and admit it.
Well, I'm out of the closet. Fuck Jesus, fuck Moses, fuck the Jews, fuck the non Jews, and fuck humanity for coming down out of the trees and making a mess of everything.
P.S.
Dear God,
If you happen to be there after all, the proceeding was just a joke. Ha ha.
User Reviews
Submitted by rad1101 (user info) at 2005-12-21 21:58:44 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
could you take the little (retired) off your name thingy please.
Submitted by punkerrjess (user info) at 2005-12-20 14:26:37 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
You make some good points.
Submitted by thaumaturge (user info) at 2005-12-20 14:13:33 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
You're right about being in a particular subculture. For those Christian-born white folk out there, he's trying to say that he has a heritage that is unique and identifiable, yet neither focal in his life nor active. Nonetheless, a heritage that separates him from the majority in this fine continent. There are many disenfranchised young christians out there who despite putting a tree up every year and maybe even make it out to a church with grandma for christmas mass, do not identify themselves as part of the christian hoard. What does one call that person [besides a non-practiscing, unorthodox, heathenesque etc... christian]? It's hard for anyone to thump their chest and pronounce their agnosticism or atheism when looking at their family album and knowing that gramps will lead grace at dinner when you get together with your family next.
I think that you are just a typical modern dude; a man with waning interest in taking a leap of faith. You are hardly alone. You do however have a family with traditions. You may not agree with them or allow them to define you, but traditions nonetheless. What you take spiritually out of these traditions is not what defines you either. It is mere heritage, not your philosophy.
I see nothing odd with being a agnostic jew. Nor do I find it strange to hear of the stories of agnostic christians. You probably have more in common with the latter in a philosophical sense (therefore more personal) than with any of the family traditions you know of. That being said, you should consider yourself a modern male looking for absolutes in your life, but still respect your family traditions [faith].
--Great mind food.
Submitted by shitfuck (user info) at 2005-12-20 10:51:58 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
How the fuck did Bob Dole learn to use a computer?
Submitted by Hairsphincter (user info) at 2005-12-20 08:18:44 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Method (user info) at 2005-12-18 11:31:22 (#)
Ranking: 0
I think if I ever had to date you Lisa, my fucking head would explode.
I think if I ever had to date you Lisa, your fucking thighs would explode.
Submitted by Hairsphincter (user info) at 2005-12-20 08:12:59 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Lisa (user info) at 2005-12-17 19:45:50 (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Method (user info) at 2005-12-16 15:05:52 (#)
Ranking: 2
WTF IM NOT JEWING ALL THAT?!?!?!?!?
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHAHA. Method is funny, and the fact that almost all the other funny people left Ubersite like two years ago makes him seem hilarious.
Boo boo ba joo.
Submitted by kolenabobena (user info) at 2005-12-20 04:37:08 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
"Can't we all just get along?
The world ends on dec. 12 2012 anyway (look it up - its the mayan calendar and its accurate). and I'd really like the next 7 years to be fun so please
CAN'T WE ALL JUST GET ALONG?
is anyone thinking of the children?
WHY WON'T SOMEBODY THINK OF THE CHILDREN? "
Haha.
Submitted by Bob_Dole (user info) at 2005-12-20 04:05:45 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
::in the voice of Jay Sherman::
Ha ha, awkward.
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Submitted by Method (user info) at 2005-12-16 15:05:52 (#)
Ranking: 2
WTF IM NOT JEWING ALL THAT?!?!?!?!?
Submitted by Bob_Dole (user info) at 2005-12-20 04:04:48 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
the 'goyums' will never get it.
Submitted by supadupapupa (user info) at 2005-12-20 03:43:44 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
I have to agree, being a Jew is not a good position in America unless you're in with the tightknit jewish community.
I'm a bad jew too, but unlike Christians whose religion means absolutely nothing to them still face prejudice. I mean to say that if I say I'm unreligious but was born a Jew people still look on that like a blemish. If I were to say that I was born a Christian and unreligious I'd be just a normal person.
That's why I love Japan, they don't care what the fuck you are. They just don't like all foreigners;)
Submitted by Istaros (user info) at 2005-12-20 03:43:25 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
that's what you get for killing Jesus
Submitted by maiorano84 (user info) at 2005-12-19 22:47:06 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
It's really hard being white.
Submitted by Judoka (user info) at 2005-12-19 16:24:32 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Razor (user info) at 2005-12-19 14:13:13 (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by DJMattB241 (user info) at 2005-12-18 15:46:34 (#)
Ranking: 0
Razor, if you don't follow any of the customs, have almost nothing in common with the other people, and apparently BARELY believe in God... how are you Jewish at all?
(not mocking. asking.)
----
That's really the question that I'm asking, Matt. I don't know the answer. But I do know that most of the American Jews of my generation are in the same boat.
To the people who said I'm an American, you're right. I'm just not certain what else I am, because there is definitely a subculture that I'm part of, but I don't think we really know what that subculture is all about.
****************
The way I see it I am very much an American, but a minority in a country that has a relatively good track record for respecting minorities. At the same time I am well aware of the parallels between the United States of the modern era and Germany of the twenties and thirties. If you know history you'll know that the German Jews were well integrated, middle class property owners. And we all know how quickly that situation devovled. I am an American, but I am a Jew. And if I have any sort of cultural affinity to my 'Jewishness' I am going to be an outsider.
Submitted by inion_de_trua (user info) at 2005-12-19 15:07:14 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by rad1101 (user info) at 2005-12-19 12:30:12 (#)
Ranking: 2
MOM!?
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crap, i thought childbirth was the one thing i was gonna be absolutely aware i participated in.
Submitted by jack11058 (user info) at 2005-12-19 14:58:57 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
shut up you hook-nosed jew bastard.
Submitted by Method (user info) at 2005-12-19 14:34:39 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Dont listen to DJMatt, he's a rapist
Submitted by Razor (user info) at 2005-12-19 14:13:13 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by DJMattB241 (user info) at 2005-12-18 15:46:34 (#)
Ranking: 0
Razor, if you don't follow any of the customs, have almost nothing in common with the other people, and apparently BARELY believe in God... how are you Jewish at all?
(not mocking. asking.)
----
That's really the question that I'm asking, Matt. I don't know the answer. But I do know that most of the American Jews of my generation are in the same boat.
To the people who said I'm an American, you're right. I'm just not certain what else I am, because there is definitely a subculture that I'm part of, but I don't think we really know what that subculture is all about.
Submitted by mles76 (user info) at 2005-12-19 12:33:04 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
You should thank Jesus for not making you a one eyed black Jew.
Submitted by rad1101 (user info) at 2005-12-19 12:30:12 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by inion_de_trua (user info) at 2005-12-19 11:07:04 (#)
Ranking: 2
yes lady. mouth and mind like a dirty fuckin sailor.
=============
MOM!?
Submitted by inion_de_trua (user info) at 2005-12-19 11:07:04 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
yes lady. mouth and mind like a dirty fuckin sailor.
Submitted by Teephphah (user info) at 2005-12-19 11:05:59 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by inion_de_trua (user info) at 2005-12-19 10:58:00 (#)
Ranking: 2
i just thank the jews for circumcision every time i have a nice hard dick in front of me.
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Ewwwwwwww. Could have done without that.
This is a family show lady(?).
Submitted by Jeanneee (user info) at 2005-12-19 10:58:44 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
rant-tastic
Submitted by inion_de_trua (user info) at 2005-12-19 10:58:00 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
i just thank the jews for circumcision every time i have a nice hard dick in front of me.
Submitted by Nellypaal (user info) at 2005-12-19 06:57:57 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
A well-written moan but just a moan nonetheless.
Submitted by williamson (user info) at 2005-12-18 19:55:02 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Razor (user info) at 2005-12-18 12:37:24 (#)
Ranking: 0
williamson, I hope you were kidding around, because otherwise you couldn't have missed the point of my post more completely.
I have as much in common with the residents of Israel as I do with the people of Sri Lanka.
-=-=-=-=-=-=-==--==--=-=-=
Then stop calling yourself a jew. I no longer consider myself a scot. Despite a bit of a nose and some curlier hair (and an amazing intellect) it's not like you guys are an entirely different race. You'd have no trouble just calling yourself white-Americans if you wanted to assimilate. Jew is just a word that you have branded yourself. And if the price of heritage is too high in your mind to consider assimilation then don't bitch to us about the oppression of Christmas. The ball of assimilation is in the jews' court. But Yahweh forbid you mix with us gentiles.
Submitted by matnotharry (user info) at 2005-12-18 18:53:30 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Roses are reddish
Violets are bluish
If it weren't for Christmas
We'd all be Jewish.
Submitted by freebie (user info) at 2005-12-18 18:14:34 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
Good rant. I never understood the hatred of jews. I mean you guys control the worlds money and strongarm food companies to kosherize food, won't let outsiders join your religion, have big noses...hey wait a minute. I hate you.
Submitted by CanucksFan (user info) at 2005-12-18 16:38:35 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
interesting
Submitted by rad1101 (user info) at 2005-12-18 16:14:21 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
OMG JUST KIDDING
Submitted by rad1101 (user info) at 2005-12-18 16:13:50 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
a litre of petrol and 20 minutes.
Submitted by DJMattB241 (user info) at 2005-12-18 15:46:34 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Razor, if you don't follow any of the customs, have almost nothing in common with the other people, and apparently BARELY believe in God... how are you Jewish at all?
(not mocking. asking.)
Submitted by Lisa (user info) at 2005-12-18 13:15:47 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Good thing you don't have to. What's your deal, Method? Like I'm the only insane woman on the planet. Stop picking on me, it hurts my feelings.
Submitted by kunta_kinte (user info) at 2005-12-18 12:44:38 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
You sir, have a point as well.
Submitted by Razor (user info) at 2005-12-18 12:37:24 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
williamson, I hope you were kidding around, because otherwise you couldn't have missed the point of my post more completely.
I have as much in common with the residents of Israel as I do with the people of Sri Lanka.
Submitted by Method (user info) at 2005-12-18 11:31:22 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
I think if I ever had to date you Lisa, my fucking head would explode.
Submitted by Method (user info) at 2005-12-18 11:22:51 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Lisa (user info) at 2005-12-18 02:33:03 (#)
Ranking: 0
Method what the fuck I picked you I PICKED YOU METHOD!!! FOR THE THING, you know. Psh. That wasn't even sarcasm. Do you want to fight me? I will break you like a toothpick with my pinky or something, shit. I love you Method we're all friends. Have a cookie.
---------------------------
WHERE ARE MY COOKIES BITCH?
Submitted by jagmcmanus (user info) at 2005-12-18 06:18:35 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
willimason you gotta understand your conspiracy theories better - the u.s is controlled by Israel. They are the puppet masters, incidentally a nobel prize winner (in any category) is most likely to be of Jewish descent than any other background (google it - they have designed and created more stuff than any other group of people per capita)
Submitted by Bryanhoop (user info) at 2005-12-18 06:15:28 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
I have been floated to this post though and through at this hour. This series of events I cannot explain. Gather your wits, your will, your power. Amazing. Your post is Famotidine my esophagus! And for this, Yahweh will bless you. But only if the politics of holiness are accepted. Reject these and accept! Learn from the man the ways of the world! Never forget the social prophets. Who of which are truly more important?
I laugh.
Submitted by williamson (user info) at 2005-12-18 06:05:24 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
It's funny that jews demand a nation of their own, cleanse out all arab influences in that land, claim god-given right to their nation and the right to maintain and practise their religion, language and culture in Israel (with the church and state inseperable) but bitch about christian influences in a land that was built by WASPs which, unlike Israel, has allowed foreign cultures, like your own, to flourish within it's very walls despite the fact that jews suck 40 billion dollars out of the USA annually to Israel so they can research nuclear weapon technology.
Nothing against you personally, but jews are in a position where if they are really that afraid that a safe, relatively peaceful nation like America is going to uprise against you (which it won't) then you should go to Israel and live amongst your own. Isn't that what you guys are killing all those pesky arabs for, anyway?
Am I allowed to say that I don't like how jews complain about Christmas or is that anti-semitic?
Submitted by malefic (user info) at 2005-12-18 03:59:31 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
K'vetsh, k'vetsh, k'vetsh! (I'm kidding, I'm kidding)
Bubbee, you have a lot of chutzpah just for posting this here. No nebbish could have combined his tsores of semi-religious beliefs and old-fashioned paranoia with such wide appeal to the masses. You managed to turn a bandwagon fad back onto it's jumpers. This must have hit like a cold drink on a bad tooth. The holocaust, however repressed, still hits a nerve.
Alas, Patriotism of the people as dictated by homeland security and our loch in kop electoral body of government has basically ensured a fanatical "christian" christmas this year. Got in heaven I pray such ignorance will be short lived. Only time will tell but I believe this message to be a mitzveh.
And if not, Nu? You'll always be my favorite nudnick.
Much love from this Idaho shikseh,
Michelle
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Yiddish really only works when it's spoken. You sound like a fucking retard trying way too hard to include every word you remember. Here, let me help: you forgot kibbitz and tuchus.
Submitted by PizzaEagle (user info) at 2005-12-18 03:00:07 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
i dont really have anything to say except great post
Submitted by Lisa (user info) at 2005-12-18 02:33:03 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Method what the fuck I picked you I PICKED YOU METHOD!!! FOR THE THING, you know. Psh. That wasn't even sarcasm. Do you want to fight me? I will break you like a toothpick with my pinky or something, shit. I love you Method we're all friends. Have a cookie.
Submitted by Lisa (user info) at 2005-12-18 02:28:38 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
I don't know, honestly. But Method, hey, I made you cookies.
Submitted by Method (user info) at 2005-12-18 01:46:01 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Lisa (user info) at 2005-12-17 19:45:50 (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Method (user info) at 2005-12-16 15:05:52 (#)
Ranking: 2
WTF IM NOT JEWING ALL THAT?!?!?!?!?
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHAHA. Method is funny, and the fact that almost all the other funny people left Ubersite like two years ago makes him seem hilarious.
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fuck u lisa, is there no fucking end to your sarcasm? I love you for it, but goddamm, how does Andy put up with that shit?
Submitted by Obscured_by_Clouds (user info) at 2005-12-18 00:17:59 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
My type of Jew really hasn't been to synagouge more than once or twice since they got Bar-Mitzvahed
--------------------------------------
I couldn't have said it better myself
Submitted by blujnbbyqn (user info) at 2005-12-17 23:56:46 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
K'vetsh, k'vetsh, k'vetsh! (I'm kidding, I'm kidding)
Bubbee, you have a lot of chutzpah just for posting this here. No nebbish could have combined his tsores of semi-religious beliefs and old-fashioned paranoia with such wide appeal to the masses. You managed to turn a bandwagon fad back onto it's jumpers. This must have hit like a cold drink on a bad tooth. The holocaust, however repressed, still hits a nerve.
Alas, Patriotism of the people as dictated by homeland security and our loch in kop electoral body of government has basically ensured a fanatical "christian" christmas this year. Got in heaven I pray such ignorance will be short lived. Only time will tell but I believe this message to be a mitzveh.
And if not, Nu? You'll always be my favorite nudnick.
Much love from this Idaho shikseh,
Michelle
Submitted by Despiadado (user info) at 2005-12-17 21:37:24 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Not bad, not bad.
But what's wrong with christmas being a national holiday if even you new age Jews celebrate it, albeit under a different name? Should we rename it all-religions-day (as per the latest outrageous request of the muslim minority here in Australia)?
Submitted by DarthFaded (user info) at 2005-12-17 20:44:40 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by bart (user info) at 2005-12-17 19:36:56 (#)
Ranking: 2
"the evangelical masses of the Midwest sweeping Bush to a second term"
I take offense to that statement. Do you know where the Midwest is? Hint: not Kentucky, Kansas, or Nebraska. Think states with Big Ten schools.
The hardworking people of Illinois, Michigan, Minnesota, and Wisconsin apologize for our inbred neighbors in Iowa and Indiana who know not what they do and then in Ohio where the election was stolen. It won't happen next time.
As for the Jews, at least you guys got Israel. Us non-Christian Christians get what, Mississippi?
On God in America, it's a myth that any of that relates to Christianity. "God" is not a Christian term any more than the word "sacred". The fact that today's Christians don't realize that is more of a testament to their ignorance than established government bias.
Christmas? Christmas isn't a religious holiday anymore than Mardis Gras is a French holiday. Do kids go to the mall and sit on Jesus's lap asking for presents? No. Do you put up a giant cross in your living room and decorate it with tinsel and frankincense? No. Sure there are some leftover songs about mangers and Bethlehem, but it's hard to take the words seriously when it's being sung by a half naked Christina Aguilera or a cartoon snowman.
Sure, Christmas has religious roots, but so do Halloween, Valentine's Day, and St. Patrick's Day. Just tell your kids the holiday has some basis in ancient mythology and then give them a GI Jew action figure playset and celebrate the birth of Hermey the dentist from the Island of Misfit Toys.
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well stated Bart.
Submitted by Bubba2341 (user info) at 2005-12-17 20:11:07 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Lisa (user info) at 2005-12-17 19:52:35 (#)
Ranking: 0
The Earth is going to implode at 0400 on April 18, 2012 so none of this really matters anyway.
______________________________________________________________________________
Is that EST or GMT?
Submitted by Lisa (user info) at 2005-12-17 19:52:35 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
The Earth is going to implode at 0400 on April 18, 2012 so none of this really matters anyway.
Submitted by Lisa (user info) at 2005-12-17 19:45:50 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Method (user info) at 2005-12-16 15:05:52 (#)
Ranking: 2
WTF IM NOT JEWING ALL THAT?!?!?!?!?
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHAHA. Method is funny, and the fact that almost all the other funny people left Ubersite like two years ago makes him seem hilarious.
Submitted by bart (user info) at 2005-12-17 19:36:56 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
"the evangelical masses of the Midwest sweeping Bush to a second term"
I take offense to that statement. Do you know where the Midwest is? Hint: not Kentucky, Kansas, or Nebraska. Think states with Big Ten schools.
The hardworking people of Illinois, Michigan, Minnesota, and Wisconsin apologize for our inbred neighbors in Iowa and Indiana who know not what they do and then in Ohio where the election was stolen. It won't happen next time.
As for the Jews, at least you guys got Israel. Us non-Christian Christians get what, Mississippi?
On God in America, it's a myth that any of that relates to Christianity. "God" is not a Christian term any more than the word "sacred". The fact that today's Christians don't realize that is more of a testament to their ignorance than established government bias.
Christmas? Christmas isn't a religious holiday anymore than Mardis Gras is a French holiday. Do kids go to the mall and sit on Jesus's lap asking for presents? No. Do you put up a giant cross in your living room and decorate it with tinsel and frankincense? No. Sure there are some leftover songs about mangers and Bethlehem, but it's hard to take the words seriously when it's being sung by a half naked Christina Aguilera or a cartoon snowman.
Sure, Christmas has religious roots, but so do Halloween, Valentine's Day, and St. Patrick's Day. Just tell your kids the holiday has some basis in ancient mythology and then give them a GI Jew action figure playset and celebrate the birth of Hermey the dentist from the Island of Misfit Toys.
Submitted by DarthFaded (user info) at 2005-12-17 17:50:31 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
I decided a long time ago to stop trying to rationalize this issue. thusly refraining from participating in debates like this. This is a losing battle no matter what... Why do I feel that way you ask? Well the answer is simply this. This is an argument of ideals and passion plain and simple. No matter what side of the coin you are on, you are ademate and steadfast in maintaining your opinion on it.
I will say that the title was rather misleading, I was expecting something a little more directed at Judaism and instead it was more using Judaism as a catalyst to illustrate a more fundamental view of society and government.
Regardless, I will say you make some very good , arguable points. But I digress that one that believed the contrary regartding religion and government, would most likely be equally convincing to someone that was middle of the road or just apathetic.
Therefore this entire topic is kind of a fight waiting to happen. I haven't read any of the reviews, yet, but I would imagine that somewhere along here we have picked up a Christian fundamentalist, that is debating this with you, and if there isn't yet... If this ends up on the most heated, it eventually will.
I don't know Jeremy. I can't say I agree, or disagree with you, at least with your underlying message, and it is apparent that we as a culture are never going to just be able to agree to disagree, due to the nature of our system... SO we are all pretty much screwed.
The one thing that I ponder and maybe if we can come up with an answer we can figure out how to remedy all this...
When does protecting one culture's liberties, start to infringe on another's?
Submitted by jgreening (user info) at 2005-12-17 15:07:34 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Plus fucking two
Submitted by The_taste_of_Monkeys (user info) at 2005-12-17 10:50:22 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
I dont have a foreskin...Im not Jewish or anything, Im just saying.
Submitted by Avals (user info) at 2005-12-17 07:01:21 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
Stop being a goddamn pansy and come live in Israel, cunt.
Submitted by Davros (user info) at 2005-12-17 06:13:31 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Interesting.
I agree on some points not others.
I am a catholic (lapsed) and share a house with a Jew (much the same as you) and a Muslim (semi-strict). We object to the seperation of holidays by celebrating everything.
Hunnukah (sp?) Eid, Christmas. We do them all.
Then again, in the UK we do not have the level of inbuilt "Christianity" that seems to be prevalent in the US.
I second what someone below said.
"Why can't we all just get along?"
-Dave
Submitted by Banga3386 (user info) at 2005-12-17 05:57:22 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Since there's no way I can respond in a true appropriate manner, just know that I am holding a standing ovation in my heart to this.
Banga
Submitted by malefic (user info) at 2005-12-17 05:48:22 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Woulda been +1 or +2 for some good points, but you ruined your own credibility by complaining about the Passion of the Christ. It wasn't anti-semitic, and even if Jesus hadn't been a Jew (in which case it could have been construed as being anti-semitic), it's essentially classical fiction, so the depiction of Jews, even in that scenario, would really be no different from (actually, in all honesty, it would probably be even less relevant than) the depiction of the cannibalistic natives in the new King Kong.
Submitted by jagmcmanus (user info) at 2005-12-17 02:38:00 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Can't we all just get along?
The world ends on dec. 12 2012 anyway (look it up - its the mayan calendar and its accurate). and I'd really like the next 7 years to be fun so please
CAN'T WE ALL JUST GET ALONG?
is anyone thinking of the children?
WHY WON'T SOMEBODY THINK OF THE CHILDREN?
Submitted by Bigmike (user info) at 2005-12-17 02:30:10 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
I cannot sympathise with you. I have no jewish or black background to tell me that I am being oppressed or discriminated against. I have no history of slavery or genocide to feel bitter about or scared of. I have no political affiliation to hold close in times of need.
I do know that I hold no grudges or prejudice against jewish people or black people or mexicans or women or labrador retrievers. I don't think that all jews are cheap or that all blacks steal or that all chinese are bad drivers or that all women are golddiggers. I don't think much of people that do think these things.
I guess that makes me unique.
Or boring.
I guess that means I have it easy.
You think it's hard being your "type" of jew?
I think it's hard just being.
Submitted by thorpe (user info) at 2005-12-17 02:28:39 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Hey seeing as you control the world's media, can you tell Channel Nine (Australia) to stop changing the theme music to the Cricket Show every season? Just as soon as you get used to the old one, they change it again.
Thanks.
Submitted by GodLovesALittleLovin (user info) at 2005-12-17 02:05:09 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
hye cazer itype out this review because i'm not jewih you feel me and that's what meteters.
Submitted by Razor (user info) at 2005-12-17 00:36:11 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
ok can we quell the argument about the Mel Gibson movie?
It's really a minor point that doesn't have much to do with the whole essay.
Go Mel. Loved you in Lethal Weapon. Have your people call my people (we own Hollywood).
Really the second half of the essay in my mind is way less important than the first. I was just stream of consciousnessing about what it means to be an American Jew, because I don't think we know what we are.
There is a natural tendency on the part of any and every human being to associate themselves with groups. It shows up in every walk of our lives, whether we're members of the PTA, Democrats, Republicans, or part of a local S&M group. We're environmentalists protesting deforestation, entrepreneurs chatting in a hotel lobby waiting for a business conference, we're fans at a football game screaming so loud that it descends into the speaking in tongues and we're carried away in religious rhapsody. We're "gays" or "jihadists" or "mothers against drunk driving".
In fact, if I described someone by just tossing out a couple of group identifiers, you'd feel like you knew a lot about the person just simply by telling you what groups they belonged to.
Try on "gay manhattanite artist". How about "fundamentalist islamic jihadist"? Perhaps you might prefer "agnostic Nascar loving immigrant".
The primary or "top level" thing with which most identify themselves is a sociocultural ethnicity, although it was not always so in history. But, we live in a time when the idea of Nationalism has become so entrenched in day to day thought that we find it hard to imagine that things might be otherwise. We are Americans, or French, or Pakastani, or Mandarin before we are anything else.
The secondary thing that people tend to identify along is religion.
I'm openly wondering what "jew" means in this time, because there have really never been any Jews to compare the modern American jewry to.
The problem is, I don't think any of us have an answer.
Submitted by firefly (user info) at 2005-12-17 00:13:51 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Siren (user info) at 2005-12-16 20:39:15 (#)
Ranking: 2
So you're saying you don't live on Reisterstown Rd?
Hahaha... Jew or Mexican.
------
Siren - I live like 5 minutes from Reisterstown Road heh. I guess you're from Baltimore too?
Submitted by Hammy_Bob (user info) at 2005-12-16 22:44:44 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
biblicaly accurate...hahaha
Submitted by forensicgirl3 (user info) at 2005-12-16 22:39:04 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
...fuck humanity for coming down out of the trees and making a mess of everything.
Amen!
Submitted by MickGinny (user info) at 2005-12-16 22:31:06 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
"Mel Gibson putting out his antisemetic propaganda to the tune of a $370,782,930 DOMESTIC IN AMERICA gross"
Mel Gibson did not put out an anti-semitic film. He made a film about a subject that lots of other films have been based upon. His was just graphic... and a lot more biblically accurate. I literally just finished watching the passion of the christ, or waht I will from now on refer to as "the whipping of the christ" 20 minutes ago . Based on biblical theology, this film is the most accurate I have seen. The only people who watch the film, then blame the jews for killing christ are imbeciles. The bloody whupped ass christ himself stated several times IN THE FILM that no one controlled his destiny...that the events that were transpiring were pre-ordained by god ....who he was.
Submitted by Death_Metal_Dude (user info) at 2005-12-16 20:47:07 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
shockingly matt continues to say moronic things
Submitted by Method (user info) at 2005-12-16 20:42:56 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by firefly (user info) at 2005-12-16 20:26:33 (#)
Ranking: 2
If you looked at his face you would know he was a Jew or a Mexican.
This is exactly why I love Firefly so much
Submitted by Siren (user info) at 2005-12-16 20:39:15 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
So you're saying you don't live on Reisterstown Rd?
Hahaha... Jew or Mexican.
Submitted by firefly (user info) at 2005-12-16 20:26:33 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
If you looked at his face you would know he was a Jew or a Mexican.
Submitted by Bubba2341 (user info) at 2005-12-16 19:20:00 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
"G.I. Jew, G.I. Jew,
killing Christ for me and you.."
Submitted by Dante_Alighieri (user info) at 2005-12-16 19:02:59 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
Toy Factory Worker: "I've just finished the new line of G.I. Jew toys."
[Presses button on G.I. Jew's back]
G.I. Jew: "You call these bagels?"
Toy Factory Worker: [Rolls eyes comically] "Whoah! I'm glad he's on OUR side!"
Submitted by DJMattB241 (user info) at 2005-12-16 18:51:55 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
before even reading it, i knew it was anti-christian, or at least could be interpretted that way, because otherwise it wouldn't have a positive rating.
but anyways, this country provides freedom OF religion, not freedom FROM religion. "Separation of church and state" is a misnomer to say the least. It doesn't appear in the constitution, or anywhere else of significance.
Bill O'Reilly, if you'd actually listen to what he's saying, isn't saying we should have "Merry Christmas" in trade for any other religious expression. He's saying that stores have LOTS of room, and they should include "Merry Christmas" "Happy Hannukah" or however you spell it (leave me alone, i'm tired), "Krazy Kwanza" and whatever else. He's against the removal of religion from what is COMPLETELY a religios holiday, even if you take it all the way back to the pagans, who were celebrating winter solstice.
This is a religous holiday. To make it otherwise is a smack in the face of religions (any of them).
Submitted by Snark (user info) at 2005-12-16 18:43:23 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Yeah, I don't get all the flack Gibson is taking at all.
He made a movie based on scripture and is being called Antisemetic for it.
As far as I know, he didn't change anything from what the Bible purportes to have happened.
So if his movie is Antisemetic then the bible is Antisemetic.
If the bible is Antisemitic, then people who practice its docrines must be as well.
So then Christians must be Antisemetic.
Seems like a pretty clear path of logic, until you realize that just because the guys who got JC in shit were Jews, doesn't mean all Jews are guilty.
The Romans drove the nails in... all Italians are Antisemetic if you ask me!
Wasn't JC a Jew? Weren't the apostles Jews? Doesn't the bible clearly state that the Jews are the chosen people of God?
People need to fucking relax.
Submitted by MANICMOTHER (user info) at 2005-12-16 18:22:26 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Heh, you and my husband have much in common.
Submitted by Teephphah (user info) at 2005-12-16 18:12:49 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Long day for me too. I'm burnt. Let's pencil something in for Monday-ish.
Submitted by Method (user info) at 2005-12-16 18:11:35 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Hope you and the wife and kiddies are doing ok
Say hello to lil Firefly for me
Submitted by Razor (user info) at 2005-12-16 18:07:25 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
That "someone" was my wife, and Jews do have Sunday school. Saturday is the Sabbath.
Itchy, I'll get back to you later. I just got home from work and don't feel like going into it further atm, but I promise I'll get back.
Submitted by Bubba2341 (user info) at 2005-12-16 17:59:08 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
If you are actually a History major you understand the Bible
is chock-full of history. The Jews orchestrated Jesus' death. Period.
As someone said before, what Jews have Sunday school? Methinks I
smell a wannabe Jew. . .
Well written ,anyway.
Submitted by Teephphah (user info) at 2005-12-16 17:47:26 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Xcuses - That was kind of a joke. See, in the post, Razor said that he hates it when people say. . . oh never mind.
Razor - Concerning your response to Thanatos -
1) You are far too intelligent to think that the SOLE issue determining the outcome of the last election was the one of gay marriage. Many people polled cited "moral issues" as a reason, but the close second was a desire not to change leadership during the middle of a war (The order of the ranking may be switched actually, I don't remember precisely). BOTH of those issues leaned heavily in GWB's favor.
2) "What am I supposed to think about the Midwest? What evidence has come out of the Midwest in the past few years that would not lead me to the conclusion that the overall culture is slipping backwards into some sort of self absorbed intolerant bible thumping froth of lunacy?" Would it be presumptuous to say, "What about me?" or "What about AJ?" Again, from the heart of the Midwest I'm forced to think, "fuck right off you geographist prick."
Your attempts to backtrack and say that not EVERY person is the Midwest is an inbred, moronic, Bible-thumping hick notwithstanding. *I* am the Midwest. I am all those people you don't trust. Maybe I'm just a bit full of myself today, but I do consider myself rational and reasonable. No matter where I live.
3) As for Mel Gibson's little piece of art, are you suggesting that what he SHOULD have done, had he wanted to tell the story, was change it? Just, you know, change this line here or that line there so that now the Jews come through and save the day? I don't know how to break it to you buddy, but, in the story, some Jews did kill Jesus (who was, lest we forget, also Jewish), and a Jewish member of the crowd DOES say, "his blood is upon us."
That's how it goes IN THE BIBLE. If you don't understand (and I won't even bother using the word "respect" here because I suspect I know how that might go, this is Uber after all) why he couldn't change it, then there probably isn't going to be any middle-ground to be found here.
But let's keep in mind the people who were up in arms about the movie, the "Anti-Defamation" League. Based on their name alone, their entire purpose is to prevent people saying anything bad about Jews. I'm sure that's a noble objective in light of Jewish history, but it would be like Christians getting uppity every time someone mentioned the Spanish Inquisition in a negative way. "You can't talk about that! It might make someone not like us!"
It happened, it was a bad thing. We're sorry. We weren't alive when it happened, but we agree that it must have sucked for everybody.
Even the Holocaust museum's take on it says that the concern was that it painted Jewish people in a negative light (again, please refer to the story itself) and that it MIGHT make people have negative feelings about Jews. Might. Maybe. Possibly. It could be theorized.
I think you may be reaching a little to find actual antisemitism there.
Submitted by Xcuses (user info) at 2005-12-16 17:41:06 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by MistressFist (user info) at 2005-12-16 17:37:17 (#)
Ranking: 2
Why do teh Jews always bitch so much? ;-)
-------------------
because people keep stealing our quarters
Submitted by Acarnis (user info) at 2005-12-16 17:40:46 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
While true that I live on the coast, I really can't fathom your fear of "Christianity." People in the flyover states must be becoming more dumb, or something. I honestly thought the President of Iran making open threats to Isreal as a bit more threatening than a movie...about a religion which supports such radical documents, like the Jewish-invented 10 Commandments. I don't know why you included the 10 commandments in a courthouse; that doesn't seem to entail much threat to Jews either. It's like a black guy being scared of a posting of MLK's speech.
Now again, I haven't been exposed to these Christians in the Bible belt, etc. Anyone wanna enlighten me?
Submitted by MistressFist (user info) at 2005-12-16 17:37:17 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Why do teh Jews always bitch so much? ;-)
Submitted by Nobb (user info) at 2005-12-16 17:31:16 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
How could I not +2 this shit? You didn't even just focus on the jewish, even if it was mostly about jews.
Submitted by Razor (user info) at 2005-12-16 17:08:23 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
The proof is in the pudding, Thanatos, or in this case the polls, as was evidenced by the evangelical masses of the Midwest sweeping Bush to a second term on the backs of (pardon the irony) gay men wanting to get married.
I don't live in New York or Los Angeles, I live near the capital. What am I supposed to think about the Midwest? What evidence has come out of the Midwest in the past few years that would not lead me to the conclusion that the overall culture is slipping backwards into some sort of self absorbed intolerant bible thumping froth of lunacy?
Of course I'm not referring to EVERY person in the Midwest, I'm not trying to suggest that it's like Sodom without one single good person, I'm referring to the predominant culture coming from there. Of course you can find any type of person anywhere in the country. There are multiple Republicans sitting within fifty feet of me, and I'm sure that most people would characterize Maryland as one of the most liberal states in the Union.
Now, as far as Mel Gibson's little piece of art goes, I'm sorry that you and many others think that passion plays are not antisemitic, but from where I'm sitting, "the cup runneth over".
Here's a link to a Holocaust Mueseum's perspective on passoin plays:
http://www.flholocaustmuseum.org/history_wing/antisemitism/arts/passion_plays.cfm
Submitted by Xcuses (user info) at 2005-12-16 17:06:09 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
no, because of this--->My type of Jew really hasn't been to synagouge more than once or twice since they got Bar-Mitzvahed
Submitted by Teephphah (user info) at 2005-12-16 16:59:33 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Xcuses (user info) at 2005-12-16 16:44:28 (#)
Ranking: 2
I am the Jew you are refering too
______________________________________
Bah! You're only saying that because you're Jewish.
Submitted by Thanatos (user info) at 2005-12-16 16:52:05 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
People threatening to boycott stores that don't put up "Merry Christmas" looks to people like me like the tip of a very scary iceberg. For those of you who blow that off immediately, here's guessing that you live on one of the coasts. There's a whole section of America between the mountain ranges that scares the shit out of me... they seem like we're one economic depression or oil crisis away from words like "jewish liberal establishment" getting thrown around seriously.
No offense, but fuck you. Why is it that everyone in New York and LA think the entire rest of the country is little better than cavemen? Sure, there is retarded shit in the midwest, like the Kansas intelligent design thing. There are also fucking idiots on your precious coasts. No, being near the ocean doesn't make your shit not stink.
On the main topic of the post: Who is going to start this new persecution? Whenever people make blatantly racist remarks they get laughed at, ridiculed, and usually sued. Was Passion of the Christ anti-Semetic? Yes. Does it encourage people to bash an entire religion for 2 thousand year old events? Fuck no.
Submitted by Xcuses (user info) at 2005-12-16 16:44:28 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
I am the Jew you are refering too
Submitted by userpete86 (user info) at 2005-12-16 16:35:50 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Solid, though I disagree.
Right above the washington monument in latin are the words "go with god." This country has a rich religious history, and though I believe that new laws should never provide a Church/State connection, attempting to eliminate them throughout our history seems silly.
Forcing children to say the Pledge is stupid not because of two words in it, but because you're forcing children to swear to things they have no real thoughts about. Blind patriotism is retarded, by any standard, and can only lead to dictatorship.
*steps off soap box*
Submitted by coocoocachoo (user info) at 2005-12-16 16:30:11 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Merry Christmas.
Submitted by corn_nugget (user info) at 2005-12-16 16:21:43 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
One of the most interesting things I've read on here in quite some time.
Submitted by CaptainThorns (user info) at 2005-12-16 16:19:22 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
And just for you, "A Goyisha Hanukkah" by Pat Godwin:
We've been dating for a month or twoish
(Her) He didn't know my last name Greene was Jewish
She's got long blond hair and first name's Veronica
(Her) Now were going to my place for Hanukkah
(Her) Meet Uncle Morty, he made a fortune selling jewelry
Who is the lady with the bad plastic surgery?
(Her) That's Aunt Sophie singing Dreidel, Dreidel, Dreidel
What is all this strange food laid out on the table?
(Her Mom) Here, eat... Have some Kreplach and Pickled Herring
No thanks Mrs. Greene; I'm not quite that daring
(Her Mom)What, no herring for a fine young Jewish Boy
I'm not Jewish
(Her) Oh my God, she's dating another Goy
(Her) Have some Gelfite fish and put on this yarmulke
Do you have any ham? Oy!...It's a Goyisha Hanukkah
(Her) Honey light a candle on the menorah
I have no idea just what they're forra
Is that the Rabbi over there praying?
(Her) Aach...to much Manneshevitz; who knows what he's saying
Why does he have a scalpel?
(Her) The baby's going to have a Bris
What's a nice Goy like me doing in a place like this?
(Her Mom) How big is the ring that you got my Veronica?
We just started dating Oy...It's a Goyisha Hanukkah
(Spoken) Two weeks later she's at my place for Christmas
Meet my Uncle Jimmy, he just had Prostate surgery
(Her) Who's the Old lady drinking Irish Whiskey?
That's my Grandma, now she singing jingle bells
Standing on a chair, grab her drink she almost fell
(Her) I just met Santa Clause; he's really fat and jolly
That's my Dad in big red suit and that's his belly by golly
(Her) What the hell does Santa Clause have to do with Jesus?
I don't know... drink your eggnog and nibble on these cheeses
(Her) When we get a tree it'll have a six-pointed star
We'll make it through the holidays as long as there's a bar
(Her) I'll wear a Santa hat; I'll wear a yarmulke
(Her) It's a Shiksa Christmas, and a Goyisha Hanukkah
Fa la la la lala Hanukkah
Submitted by CaptainThorns (user info) at 2005-12-16 16:16:51 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
+2 because your post just gave me a superb idea for a new post of mine.
Submitted by loki (user info) at 2005-12-16 16:02:42 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
damnit TP had me beat
Submitted by loki (user info) at 2005-12-16 16:02:17 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Maybe they've all been driving insane from drinking that horrid wine of theirs.
Submitted by Teephphah (user info) at 2005-12-16 15:59:44 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
A bar where all you can get is Manaschewitz?
Submitted by sl4tt3ry (user info) at 2005-12-16 15:57:54 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
I think you made alot of valid points in this
My favorite bar has a Chanukah bush. They're one of the few places open on
Christmas Eve and Christmas Day.
+2 for Jews who own bars
Submitted by HighVoltage900 (user info) at 2005-12-16 15:57:23 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
See I told you.
Submitted by HighVoltage900 (user info) at 2005-12-16 15:57:13 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
You're getting two of these. One for the title. One for the post.
Submitted by JonnyX (user info) at 2005-12-16 15:56:37 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
A BIG Shout-out to the Six Pointy, my Heeb-Bro!
So, I'm guessing you're Reform...the Unitarians of the Hebrews
Submitted by firefly (user info) at 2005-12-16 15:51:04 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
How do Jews have sunday school?
Submitted by loki (user info) at 2005-12-16 15:50:59 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
true enough
remember kids when you hear the phrase "liberal elite" what they're really saying is "dirty joooo"
The "Mel Gibson thing" he's talking about is that little passion play he made. These kinds of things have been used over the centuries to spur the population into anti-Semitic rages.
meaning that when I said that "liberal elite" means "dirty jew", really what it means is "dirty jesus killing jew".
Submitted by Razor (user info) at 2005-12-16 15:50:48 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
To be honest, I love everything about the Christmas holiday except the whole Jesus bit, and I don't know how I can celebrate it without being a complete barking system failure mass of contradictions, but guess what?
My 3 year old daughter who goes to a Jewish preschool is getting presents on December 25th, and she's calling them Christmas presents.
She's fucked too.
Actually, what's even more bizzare is that there's an Arab kid in her class.
Submitted by Razor (user info) at 2005-12-16 15:48:33 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Honestly though, I've heard of "self-hating Jews" before, but never understood what it meant. Is this what that looks like? You seem very conflicted. "I'm a jew, but I'm NOT a jew." "Christians hate jews, because they are stupid and Mel Gibson told them to, and even though I don't have anything in common with orthodox jews, the Christians are going FORCE me to sing Christmas carols, which I will resent, even though I DO like the Christmas trees, and that's why it sucks to be well educated and well off, and allowed to vote. And own property. And stuff."
----
That's remarkably fucking funny, and 90% accurate. I don't really think Christians are stupid in any way, I don't actually believe in Christianity or Judaism one more than the other, and I don't hate myself.
But all the culture conflict is right on point, and the problem is there's a whole generations of Jewish people right now who think "I'm a jew, but I'm NOT a jew."
And we're right.
Submitted by Astropath (user info) at 2005-12-16 15:39:29 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
I say we return to the ship, nuke the site from orbit. It's the only way to be sure.
Submitted by Kirbage (user info) at 2005-12-16 15:39:28 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Plus 2 even though I wasn't with you all the way. You managed to rant without something like a fag.
Mel Gibson thing?
What point did the 'under god' guy have?
Submitted by Teephphah (user info) at 2005-12-16 15:37:57 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
If you're lucky. The more common reaction to any complaint about anything that affects Jewish people is "You're only complaining about that because you're Jewish."
How come when Kofi Annan talks about the AIDS crisis in Africa, nobody says "You're only complaining because you're black"?
----------------------------------------
Um? Because people are DYING of AIDS by the tens of thousands in Africa? Maybe?
I'm just spit-balling here.
Before I begin strapping on my jack-boots, I'd like to thank you on behalf of all the terrifying individuals in fly-over country.
I want to reassure you that me and mine are only going to come for you and yours if you stop producing funny comedians. Once you stop entertaining us, you're soap.
Honestly though, I've heard of "self-hating Jews" before, but never understood what it meant. Is this what that looks like? You seem very conflicted. "I'm a jew, but I'm NOT a jew." "Christians hate jews, because they are stupid and Mel Gibson told them to, and even though I don't have anything in common with orthodox jews, the Christians are going FORCE me to sing Christmas carols, which I will resent, even though I DO like the Christmas trees, and that's why it sucks to be well educated and well off, and allowed to vote. And own property. And stuff."
Submitted by proofofpurchase (user info) at 2005-12-16 15:37:20 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
I think I got two of yer boys in here....
http://www.ubersite.com/m/75063
Submitted by FATMANTPK (user info) at 2005-12-16 15:36:19 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
How come when Kofi Annan talks about the AIDS crisis in Africa, nobody says "You're only complaining because you're black"?
--
Exactly
Submitted by Serious_Melvin (user info) at 2005-12-16 15:33:05 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Jon Stewart is a fucking GODSEND. Or something to that effect.
Submitted by indoninja (user info) at 2005-12-16 15:29:30 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
Would have been a plus two, but I didn't think passions of christ was antisemetic.
That and my hebe girlfriend wants me to light the minorah with her if I want my 8 presents. It's okay though she only gets coal for christmas unless she gets baptized.
Submitted by the_thorne (user info) at 2005-12-16 15:29:18 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Good points.
...Try going into the US when you're Canadian...(it's scary)...
Submitted by Jack_McCallum (user info) at 2005-12-16 15:25:32 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
What are you complaining about? You guys run the liberal media and have a nation full of blacks and mixed-race mongrels to do your bidding as you agitate for the coming race war.
Want to bitch about Christmas? Bitch about the Jew that started it all.
Submitted by MyNameIsTim (user info) at 2005-12-16 15:16:46 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
for not being a retard.
good points.
i just ate bad sushi, and i feel like cunt.
Submitted by Snark (user info) at 2005-12-16 15:14:03 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Sup with the Mel Gibson / Antisemetic thing?
Submitted by GodChicken (user info) at 2005-12-16 15:13:42 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
I have been giving serious thought to becoming a professional expatriate. I expect by my 40's to have abandoned this sinking ship and invested as much as I can in a life in another country, before the dollar collapses like Argentina's did.
Submitted by BLITZKREIG_BOB (user info) at 2005-12-16 15:12:57 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Interesting.
I see intelligent observations, no HAHA RABBIT, no really large .jpgs with archaic pop culture icons, no gossip, and no drama. What's going on here?
Submitted by Method (user info) at 2005-12-16 15:05:52 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
WTF IM NOT JEWING ALL THAT?!?!?!?!?