It's BillsSBChamps - The Interview, live from Parris Island, SC (4610 hits)
Category: RomanceRating: 1.32 on 245 reviews (Rate this item) (V)
Submitted by ShlongyPostsShit (View user info) at 2005-12-20 20:57:14 EST
I realize that I am making a departure from my usual 'World's Best Poster' position by posting something that actually matters a wee bit, but it's time for an update - live from Parris Island, SC - from Uber's favorite "American fighting sooooool-dier", BillsSBChamps.
For those of you that are new around here, and those that have had your heads shoved firmly up your collective asses for the past couple of months, you may or may not know- or give a fuck - that Brendan FINALLY was able to pass all the required drug tests and make his way from the steamy tropics of Buffalo, NY into boot camp on Parris Island back in early October, in his attempt to straighten the fuck up and become a US Marine.
As the closest Uberite to Parris Island, I smelled a good story when I heard one, and drove the required 45 minutes over to P.I. to play golf on this really sweet little course right on the base. Oops...I got off track here.
Then, I remembered that I was really there to find out why we haven't heard from Brendan for two months - so I decided to climb over some barbed wire and find out what the fuck the hold up was...and when was Brendan graduating so I could take him out and celebrate with about 17 drinks when he officially "becomes a man".
After spending four hours in "the brig", I finally managed to get released - not because of my compelling discourse into why I was so interested in speaking to this Uber MIA, but because quite frankly, the fucking sentry on duty basically got tired of hearing me babble on about "Uber ghey menz" and my threats to "-2 his ass if we ever met on the street".
So anyway, Brendan and I finally sat down in the mess hall for a chat - he had the Chicken and Peas in a rusty can while I opted for 7 or 8 Marlboros - and we got down to business.
Here are some excerpts from the interview:
Shlongy: Whoa...you look like shit. You're Brendan?
BillsSBChamps: Nice meeting you too, you old fuck. Bring any weed with you?
After exchanging some more pleasantries, we skip ahead to some semi-interesting conversation.
Shlongy: So, is it everything you thought it would be?
BillsSBChamps: Well, I'm only on training day 11 because I got dropped as soon as I got here because I got fucking pneumonia which blew my ass. It took me about 5 weeks to get back in training. So far it's been alright.
Shlongy: So, you're off to a great start. What do you miss about your "old life"?
BillsSBChamps: It kind of blows not playing poker but I only got 2 months left and then I can blow all my boot camp money on gambling, booze and whores.
Shlongy: Well, I'm officially bored. Anything else you'd like to pass along to Uber because you know, I've posted nothing but pretty much shit for about the last 5 months and this COULD be a post for me.
BillsSBChamps: Make sure you tell all the Uber nerds to suck my balls and tell the whores I'll be back soon.
He then asked me to "send him some pics of hot broads" and "in case anyone was wondering, I only beat off once so far".
He is a classic!
Every quote from Brendan is 100% true and accurate. I did NOT make any of this up.
His graduation is February 24 and we will be going out in Hilton Head if anyone is interested in watching our backs that evening.
Ladies - If you ARE interested in sending Brendan a picture, just e-mail me and I'll give you his address in camp.
I am sending him a box of Maxim magazines - I'm not sure if they're able to accept Playboys but I think Maxim will fit their needs just fine.
I will also be sending him a copy of this post so MAKE IT GOOD PEOPLE!
Ta da.
User Reviews
Submitted by Maltese (user info) at 2006-07-21 16:34:34 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
+2 in hopes that we can make peace with each other. Friends?
Submitted by BillsSBChamps (user info) at 2006-07-03 14:57:58 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
It sucks that you were out of town the weekend I graduated but oh well.
I don't reaqlly remember much except that I drank about 1943523 shots of tequila and tried to fuck everything that walked by me, somethings don't change.
Now you'll just have to make your way out to Cali and buy me those dozen or so drinks you owe me.
I got taken for about 375 last night when some asshole called my 23 preflop raise with 4 5 off suit against my kk, he flopped a pair of 5's and proceeded to call me all the way to the river where he was rewarded with another 5 and about half of my chips. I fucking hate absolute poker, worst site ever.
Submitted by Cyrus (user info) at 2006-04-18 18:32:36 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
Bullshit - I've seen Jarhead - he's rubbed out more than one.
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2006-03-20 20:14:36 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Where's my invite...lost in the mail? A likely story.
Submitted by Sideburns (user info) at 2006-03-19 15:38:46 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Yes... I'm getting married March 25... a week from today.
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2006-03-13 11:33:22 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
Email me and let me know when you'll be in my neighborhood. I'll take you to lunch. Or after work cocktails. Or something.
Then, if all goes well, you can blow me.
Submitted by legallady (user info) at 2006-03-12 20:07:01 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Good Post.
Working on a road trip your
direction.
I quit being a governmentemployee
and have no time for Uber in the
real business world.
Submitted by AsshOly (user info) at 2006-03-12 16:04:52 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Any post about the Marines will get a +2 from me.
Submitted by full_frontal (user info) at 2005-12-20 21:29:15 (#)
Ranking: 1
MARINES - Looking For A Few Good Drug Abusing Womanizers
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
The Marines are pretty big on not beating the shit out of your wife.
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2006-03-09 10:08:16 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Thank you...Through hard work and preserverance, even a fucking retard , like Shlongy, can accomplish great things.
Remember that kids...and stay in school!
Submitted by rad1101 (user info) at 2006-03-09 01:48:48 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
jesus christ shlongy. You really came from behind in this race to #1.
good job, dipshit.
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2006-03-08 18:36:49 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
WE'RE NUMBER 1:
Everything you ever wanted to know about Shlongy
User id: 10879
Registered on or around: 2004-08-02 17:37:55
# Messages posted: 99
# Reviews written: 20000 !!!!!!!!!!!!!!
# Times these posts have been reviewed : 7087
# Hits: 154668
Average rating of all messages: 0.24
Submitted by electrictoothsyndrome (user info) at 2006-03-07 11:06:46 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
No Comment
Submitted by BranDo (user info) at 2006-02-14 21:15:14 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2006-02-14 20:47:46 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Thanks for the compliment.
Submitted by OneCheapGeek (user info) at 2006-02-14 11:41:29 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
http://www.ubersite.com/m/82665#1835858
You're such a child.
Submitted by Sacrilicious (user info) at 2006-02-09 20:28:25 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Shlong- speaking of hot, slutty birds- you got down with two of us here. Read it, won't you?
http://www2.ubersite.com/m/83547
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2006-02-09 20:11:29 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
If apollo and Shlongy ever get together down in TEX-ASS, lock up the women and batton down the hatches.
Well, leave the hot, slutty birds unlocked.
Submitted by apollo88 (user info) at 2006-02-09 20:10:00 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
retaliatory +2
Submitted by JonnyX (user info) at 2006-02-09 16:21:55 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
forgot to rate this
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2006-02-06 11:25:49 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Shlongy posts never really die.
They remain on life support for years.
Submitted by redskieslookfake (user info) at 2006-02-06 11:15:16 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
http://www.ubersite.com/m/83507
---
Shlongy - you're a music fan - opinions?
Submitted by Bubba2341 (user info) at 2006-02-05 10:26:16 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Eat shit, SammySpiders. Rate the post, asshole. Is that
really so hard? Fuckstick...
Submitted by Smack_Fuck (user info) at 2006-02-05 10:13:53 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
how can a day go by without a review on a shlongy post.
Submitted by SammySnyders (user info) at 2006-02-02 02:41:55 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
Negative Shlongy auto 2
Submitted by EchoBoxing (user info) at 2006-01-31 22:40:00 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
i didn't bother going through the reviews so if anyone else noticed the "onlyjackeditoncesofar" filename, well, too bad.
it was funny.
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2006-01-31 18:08:15 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
One more hit.
Submitted by Merlina (user info) at 2006-01-30 14:48:15 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by douglar02 (user info) at 2006-01-19 16:27:05 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
i think you need a life
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2006-01-19 15:51:08 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
Will someone please close the door?
The teenaged faggots are breaking into my posts.
Submitted by douglar02 (user info) at 2006-01-19 15:34:45 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
wow, your uberness on the virtual world is awsome!
Submitted by douglar02 (user info) at 2006-01-19 13:55:00 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
who cares about YOU and what YOU do
Submitted by Envenom (user info) at 2006-01-18 21:49:25 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
What's up with the gay ass love fest going on in the reviews?
Yea, this place is definitely lacking some Brenden.
Submitted by Gumbo (user info) at 2006-01-17 22:29:24 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
you have the hots for a horse-faced male?
*scribbles on prescription*
YOU'RE GHEY!
Submitted by polyamorousaj (user info) at 2006-01-07 19:43:02 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2006-01-07 15:11:59 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
http://www.ubersite.com/m/45899
That's who.
Submitted by SkinnyKenny (user info) at 2006-01-06 20:28:11 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Who's the kid, Shlong?
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2006-01-06 16:55:58 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Congrats cexshun, I think.
I'd let the kid stew in his shit-filled diapers before I could quit Uber cold turkey.
But that's just me.
Submitted by SkinnyKenny (user info) at 2006-01-06 16:40:29 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by cexshun (user info) at 2006-01-06 16:19:40 (#)
Ranking: 2
I still live
________________________
Good to know.
Submitted by cexshun (user info) at 2006-01-06 16:33:50 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Classic story...
Boy likes best friend's little sister
boy screws the hell out of friend's sister
girl get pregnant
boy is married and has a kid at 24yrs old
Same shit, different day. With all the diapers and crying and monogamy, I had to retire from uber quietly.
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2006-01-06 16:26:02 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
No shit...It's one of Shlongy's first fans, cexshun.
You get paroled or what?
Submitted by cexshun (user info) at 2006-01-06 16:19:40 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
I still live
Submitted by SkinnyKenny (user info) at 2006-01-06 11:12:04 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Heh heh. Yeah, I opened myself up for that one. We're cool, man.
And I do enjoy reading your reviews.
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2006-01-05 14:29:09 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
I hold no grudges.
As long as you grovel and apologize, which it looks like you have done.
Short of the posting of people's personal info - which is reason enough for getting your teeth kicked in -, I don't know HOW or WHY anyone on Uber lets the friendly banter and insults get to them...but they do.
I've laughed my ass off at almost every Anti-Shlongy post...comedy is comedy, even if Shlongy is the brunt of the joke.
But once someone shows that "their feelings are hurt"...it's open season.
Submitted by SkinnyKenny (user info) at 2006-01-05 12:33:17 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Yeah, I was in a shitty mood yesterday. My apologies.
Submitted by TigerLilly (user info) at 2006-01-05 11:55:10 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by SkinnyKenny (user info) at 2006-01-05 11:35:48 (#)
Ranking: 0
Actually, I imagine if we met we'd end up having a few beers together and shooting the shit for a few hours, generally having a good time.
--------------------------------------------------------------
Now that sounds more like it. Lets all be friends.
Shlongy..I got your address I coming to your house to peep in your windows.
Submitted by SkinnyKenny (user info) at 2006-01-05 11:35:48 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Actually, I imagine if we met we'd end up having a few beers together and shooting the shit for a few hours, generally having a good time.
AS long as I wasn't wearing a dress, huh?
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2006-01-05 10:03:07 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
I'm sure not hard to find...I'll even give directions to my house if MapQuest is too confusing.
I always enjoy meeting up with Uberites...and at this point, not one of them has taken a swing at me. Yet.
I actually can't wait for it to happen though.
On a side note, BillsSBChamps thoroughly enjoyed his post...I'm now on his mailing list.
He is a bit disappointed that only one Uber broad took the time to mail him a picture, though. A special "Thanks" goes out to the one Patriotic broad, who I will not shame by naming.
Submitted by Method (user info) at 2006-01-04 19:16:40 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
hahahahahaa, I believe that's the 23984th person to threaten to beat up Shlongy.
Kenny, do yourself a favor and shut the fuck up before you REALLY look like an asshole. You're on that slippery slope, and it doesn't look good for you.
Submitted by SkinnyKenny (user info) at 2006-01-04 19:05:29 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by SkinnyKenny (user info) at 2006-01-04 18:17:02 (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2006-01-04 18:06:01 (#)
Ranking: -2
You sure sound gay.
While you're in the mood to "wish" for stuff,
------------------------------------------------
I wish for you to come to vegas and say that to my face. Then we'll see what kind of balls you have, or if you just put on this big persona online to make up for the pussy you really are.
Submitted by SkinnyKenny (user info) at 2005-12-24 23:08:37 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
"I realize that I am making a departure from my usual 'World's Best Poster' position by posting something that actually matters a wee bit,"
----------------------------------
Oh for God's sake don't get topical on us.
Submitted by Spam (user info) at 2005-12-24 22:33:26 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Method (user info) at 2005-12-22 14:11:02 (#)
Ranking: 2
hahahahahaah
This place wouldn't be the same without Shlongy
Submitted by rad1101 (user info) at 2005-12-24 18:54:10 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
he already did that.
Submitted by Bubba2341 (user info) at 2005-12-24 18:08:04 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Deconstruction (user info) at 2005-12-24 14:34:31 (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2005-12-24 10:09:48 (#)
Ranking: 0
What should I do for my 100th post?
----
Naked pictures.
of yourself.
____________________________________________________
bad idea. BAD IDEA!! Aaaarrrggghhhhhhh!!
Submitted by Deconstruction (user info) at 2005-12-24 14:34:31 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2005-12-24 10:09:48 (#)
Ranking: 0
What should I do for my 100th post?
----
Naked pictures.
of yourself.
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2005-12-24 10:09:48 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
What should I do for my 100th post?
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2005-12-23 08:21:01 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Thanks, TL! Saved me the trouble.
Submitted by TigerLilly (user info) at 2005-12-23 01:56:12 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2005-12-23 00:02:26 (#)
Ranking: -2
Someone please tell Smack Fuck that when he finishes cutting my fucking lawn, he can leave, but to shut his fucking mouth.
====================================
Smack fuck when you're done cutting Shlong's lawn, leave. But before you do that Shut your fucking pie hole.
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2005-12-23 00:02:26 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
Someone please tell Smack Fuck that when he finishes cutting my fucking lawn, he can leave, but to shut his fucking mouth.
Submitted by Bubba2341 (user info) at 2005-12-22 19:58:45 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Smack_Fuck (user info) at 2005-12-22 18:28:21 (#)
Ranking: -2
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2005-12-22 16:45:10 (#)
Ranking: 0
I wouldn't worry about that...He won't think you're a "prick", per se.
-----
Don't use 'per se' if you don't know what it means you stupid fucking rock ape.
_______________________________________________________________________
"He's Dr. Shlongy. He knows more than you do."
Submitted by Bubba2341 (user info) at 2005-12-22 19:32:08 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
This was a great post. It has meaning and is done in the spirit
of helping a young man find his way. Shlongy wrote it? Oh wait...
Submitted by Smack_Fuck (user info) at 2005-12-22 18:42:38 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2005-12-22 13:58:47 (#)
Ranking: 0
No, this was funny
------
http://tinypic.com/view/?pic=iz87rm
Submitted by Smack_Fuck (user info) at 2005-12-22 18:28:21 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2005-12-22 16:45:10 (#)
Ranking: 0
I wouldn't worry about that...He won't think you're a "prick", per se.
-----
Don't use 'per se' if you don't know what it means you stupid fucking rock ape.
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2005-12-22 16:45:10 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
I wouldn't worry about that...He won't think you're a "prick", per se.
He thinks all the broads on Uber are, and I quote, "whores".
So it's all good, babycakes.
Submitted by forensicgirl3 (user info) at 2005-12-22 16:09:35 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2005-12-22 11:42:22 (#)
Ranking: 0
No one has to post anymore.
I already printed up the 27 pages of this post and mailed them to Serviceman BillsSBChamps.
Thanks for playing!
------------------
Aw shit! He'll read that I think he's a bit of a prick.
Oh well.
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2005-12-22 15:39:09 EST (#)
Ranking: -1
Compliments like that get me all warm and fuzzy...
Then, I look for some shit post where I can call the author a bunch of names and that feeling goes away...Thank God.
Submitted by LiquidPaper (user info) at 2005-12-22 15:09:52 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
this is a complete pile of awesomeness
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2005-12-22 14:55:20 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Now WHY, pray tell, would this cocklicker BOONCOCK, leave a coward -2 and go running without a comment?
I put a lot of work in this post, asshole. I can take the -2; I'd just like to know why such an obvious anal-invader such as yourself didn't like this comedic look at the interworkings of our US Military.
Submitted by Boondock (user info) at 2005-12-22 14:39:59 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
No Comment
Submitted by Teephphah (user info) at 2005-12-22 14:22:43 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Jeanneee (user info) at 2005-12-21 09:42:22 (#)
Ranking: 2
I loves me some Brendan.
-------------------------------------------------------------
Keep your head down, B.
Submitted by Method (user info) at 2005-12-22 14:11:02 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
hahahahahaah
This place wouldn't be the same without Shlongy
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2005-12-22 13:58:47 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
No, this was funny, ya braindead fatass.
Hey- go check the oven...Your Swanson "Hearty Man Dinner For One" is ready!
Submitted by kai070169 (user info) at 2005-12-22 13:53:24 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
Here ya crybay alkie, have another & go kill your liver some more.
And this WAS GAY.
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2005-12-22 13:16:02 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Check it out.
2 -2's.
One from CanucksFan, the little virgin zitboy, and one from Kai; the fatass, attention starved zero.
What are the odds of THAT happening?
Submitted by kai070169 (user info) at 2005-12-22 13:06:56 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
Nice to see you being a homosexual instead of a pedophile. Fag.
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2005-12-22 11:42:22 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
No one has to post anymore.
I already printed up the 27 pages of this post and mailed them to Serviceman BillsSBChamps.
Thanks for playing!
Submitted by thorpe (user info) at 2005-12-22 08:14:56 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
I see Shlongy's getting the Ubercon bug...
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2005-12-22 08:07:00 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Who let zitboy comment in my post? I thought I put out the "NO Dipshits Allowed" sign.
Someone, please call the Clearasil Police to fix his face.
Submitted by CanucksFan (user info) at 2005-12-22 03:31:39 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
yawn
Submitted by rad1101 (user info) at 2005-12-21 21:59:22 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
this +2 is purely out of asskissing.
Submitted by TigerLilly (user info) at 2005-12-21 21:41:34 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by knucklesnelson (user info) at 2005-12-21 21:39:30 (#)
Ranking: 2
wow you actually wrote something worth reading. You sure are a swell guy going and seeing him and all, but wheres the part about you two tradin the buttsex, and swapping spit in the shower. Can we expect a part two?
----------------------------------------------------------------
AHAHAHAHAHA...now THAT was funny!
Submitted by knucklesnelson (user info) at 2005-12-21 21:39:30 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
wow you actually wrote something worth reading. You sure are a swell guy going and seeing him and all, but wheres the part about you two tradin the buttsex, and swapping spit in the shower. Can we expect a part two?
Submitted by Bubba2341 (user info) at 2005-12-21 20:25:33 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Good post, Shlongy. G'nite...
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2005-12-21 20:11:53 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Looks like that's about it.
Time to close up shop here. Thanks for stopping by.
Submitted by MyTeeOne (user info) at 2005-12-21 17:53:47 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Hey. Hey. I'm German too. w00-
========================================
Well then Tiger, I guess we should mate.
Sweeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeet.
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2005-12-21 17:33:34 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Nice job kids...now I can eat the fettucine without a care in the world.
Submitted by forensicgirl3 (user info) at 2005-12-21 17:15:09 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
gasoline, and other sundry combulstibles
Submitted by forensicgirl3 (user info) at 2005-12-21 17:13:59 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
two sticks
Submitted by Xcuses (user info) at 2005-12-21 15:52:41 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
look at this faggity post still going.
Submitted by TigerLilly (user info) at 2005-12-21 15:52:33 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by FartSmeller (user info) at 2005-12-21 15:29:06 (#)
Ranking: 0
eh, tuckermax is a pompous fag. Besides, I'm looking for another posting website like uber but with different, new people. Not a conversation thread or forum site.
-----------------------------------------------------------
Alright. Alright. Calm down. Just a suggestion. Frankie says RELAX.
Submitted by forensicgirl3 (user info) at 2005-12-21 15:49:51 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Ain't quite warm enough in here! More heat.
Also, I despise 98.37659% of people. Just FYI.
Have a nice day!
Submitted by FartSmeller (user info) at 2005-12-21 15:29:06 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
eh, tuckermax is a pompous fag. Besides, I'm looking for another posting website like uber but with different, new people. Not a conversation thread or forum site.
Submitted by TigerLilly (user info) at 2005-12-21 15:27:21 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Tuckermax.com
Submitted by FartSmeller (user info) at 2005-12-21 15:22:50 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
anybody by chance know of another site similar to ubersite. Not pulsehead, that place blows. But something similar where I could find some new shit?
Submitted by scourge (user info) at 2005-12-21 15:08:09 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by TigerLilly (user info) at 2005-12-21 14:54:09 (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by MyTeeOne (user info) at 2005-12-21 14:17:05 (#)
Ranking: 2
But take it from me. He's Eye-talian...Mmmmm mmmm good.
==================================================================
Damn I wish I was Eye-talian. I'm German. No one ever says "Gerrrrrman, yummy."
<sigh>
------------------------------------------------
Hey. Hey. I'm German too. w00-
---
Me too. Let's all have an orgy with polka music as the soundtrack and hassenpfeffer and shit. Afterwards we could, I don't know...what else are Germans famous for?
Didn't soemone say TL was an anti-Semite?
Uh-oh.
Submitted by TigerLilly (user info) at 2005-12-21 14:54:09 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by MyTeeOne (user info) at 2005-12-21 14:17:05 (#)
Ranking: 2
But take it from me. He's Eye-talian...Mmmmm mmmm good.
==================================================================
Damn I wish I was Eye-talian. I'm German. No one ever says "Gerrrrrman, yummy."
<sigh>
------------------------------------------------
Hey. Hey. I'm German too. w00-
Submitted by scourge (user info) at 2005-12-21 14:45:29 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by MyTeeOne (user info) at 2005-12-21 12:25:13 (#)
Ranking: 2
I have no idea who Brendan is, but +2 to you for being in the military. My cousin is stationed in Korea. (Plus I haven't been here long enough to give Shlongy a bad review. You need seniority to do that).
----
Seniority to give Shlongy a bad review? Bah...fuck Shlongy.
Sorry master. It won't happen again.
Submitted by MyTeeOne (user info) at 2005-12-21 14:17:05 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
But take it from me. He's Eye-talian...Mmmmm mmmm good.
==================================================================
Damn I wish I was Eye-talian. I'm German. No one ever says "Gerrrrrman, yummy."
<sigh>
Submitted by TigerLilly (user info) at 2005-12-21 14:08:43 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Check out some of these that I linked. He's amazing.
http://www.ubersite.com/m/72373
Submitted by Crystle (user info) at 2005-12-21 14:07:06 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Sigh.
Ok, fine. He's in your territory then, Tiger..
I'll just go read his stories and sob quietly to myself.
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2005-12-21 13:59:39 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
See youse later. Heat.
Submitted by TigerLilly (user info) at 2005-12-21 13:36:37 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Crystle (user info) at 2005-12-21 13:26:46 (#)
Ranking: 2
So Tiger... where can I get pics of Badlands... and if he's too far from you, is he close to me? or kind of stuck halfway in the middle?
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Hahahaha..no. He lives in Rochester, New York. Five hours from me, but much too far for you. Unless of course you like the long distance thing. He doesn't though.
As far as I know Badlands hasn't posted any pictures. He's a mystery-man. But take it from me. He's Eye-talian...Mmmmm mmmm good.
Submitted by Crystle (user info) at 2005-12-21 13:26:46 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
So Tiger... where can I get pics of Badlands... and if he's too far from you, is he close to me? or kind of stuck halfway in the middle?
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2005-12-21 13:25:30 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Must be some fag jihad pacifist.
Find him and kill him.
Submitted by TigerLilly (user info) at 2005-12-21 13:23:10 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Smack_Fuck (user info) at 2005-12-21 13:19:13 (#)
Ranking: -2
What the fuck is THIS?
------------------------------------------------
THIS? This is a word.
Used to refer to the person or thing present, nearby, or just mentioned: This is my cat. These are my tools.
Used to refer to what is about to be said: Now don't laugh when you hear this.
Used to refer to the present event, action, or time: said he'd be back before this.
Used to indicate the nearer or the more immediate one: This is mine and that is yours.
Submitted by Smack_Fuck (user info) at 2005-12-21 13:19:13 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
What the fuck is THIS?
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2005-12-21 13:07:25 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
I know that I sure wasn't as erect as I could have been...
Submitted by TigerLilly (user info) at 2005-12-21 13:00:12 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
No Shit. Where the hell you been Peon? We had a party here and it wasn't the same without you.
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2005-12-21 12:56:21 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Not ALL the fun...I'm sure that if you flash your mammoth funbags in here this afternoon, you can set the joint on fire.
Your military needs you now, Peon, more than ever. Don't let Brendan down.
Submitted by Professional_Peon (user info) at 2005-12-21 12:51:47 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
WTF?!?!
I spend my whole morning working and it seems I've missed all the fun.
Submitted by HadToBeDone (user info) at 2005-12-21 12:26:23 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Crystle (user info) at 2005-12-21 11:47:56 (#)
Ranking: 2
And Brendan, miss you!
-----
Get a better scope on your rifle.
Submitted by MyTeeOne (user info) at 2005-12-21 12:25:13 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
I have no idea who Brendan is, but +2 to you for being in the military. My cousin is stationed in Korea. (Plus I haven't been here long enough to give Shlongy a bad review. You need seniority to do that).
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2005-12-21 12:16:58 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
I have to go to Savannah in about an hour...think you can keep this on fire? You're doing a great job, TL...I'll pay you later.
In tongue.
Submitted by MickGinny (user info) at 2005-12-21 12:14:03 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
wow, this fagfest sure jumped off.
Submitted by TigerLilly (user info) at 2005-12-21 12:07:59 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Crystle these are things to note about Badlands.
1. He's an amazing writer.
2. He lives too far from me
3. He's into weird porn.
4. He's in advertising
5. He's HOT!!!!
Submitted by Badlands (user info) at 2005-12-21 12:01:02 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
Oh Abolsutely, K! Everything tasted amazing.
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2005-12-21 11:51:01 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
apollo- From what you have told me, the only thing I can think of is that security must think you're smuggling explosives...in your head.
Submitted by Crystle (user info) at 2005-12-21 11:47:56 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Hahahahaa...
I came back to congratulate you on the Heat, shlongy, and here I find that it's Tigerlilly that's helped you break the Tigerlilly streak...
mental note to self: must learn more about Badlands...
And Brendan, miss you!
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2005-12-21 11:47:43 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Not as good as Tahou's....
Submitted by apollo88 (user info) at 2005-12-21 11:47:16 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
what the fuck are you people talking about?
you know when we brits drivel on and you don't know what we are saying?
Well that is happening to me now reading these reviews.
Oh and FYI George Bush Airport (ha!) sucks fucking ass.
I plugged my laptop in and they made me unplug it.
Why?
SECURITY.
IN A FUCKING BUSINESS LOUNGE.
So you pay for business class, so you can you know WORK (surf uber naturally) and you can't plug your laptop in.
What POSSIBLE security risk is plugging a laptop in?
Submitted by TigerLilly (user info) at 2005-12-21 11:43:06 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
But how about that restaurant? Good eats. Huh Badlands?
Submitted by Fartman (user info) at 2005-12-21 11:42:58 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
"good post"
Submitted by TigerLilly (user info) at 2005-12-21 11:40:46 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
I have NO idea what you're talking about. I went to Dunkin Donuts.
So, think you'll come to the mountains? ;)
Submitted by shitfuck (user info) at 2005-12-21 11:39:20 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
I hope he kills some fat kids.
Submitted by Badlands (user info) at 2005-12-21 11:37:15 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
Katherine - The only reason I "found" those mags under the mattress in the first place, is becuase the matress had practically moved to the floor... :)
And Shlongy - Done and done. I'll figure out how to ship it so that it "keeps". I'll email you.
Submitted by TigerLilly (user info) at 2005-12-21 11:28:28 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
You can ship anything if you package it well. I shipped freaking craw dads from New Orleans one year after Jazz Fest.
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2005-12-21 11:26:30 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
I know he would. I'm just not sure if food will ship - especially, a garbage plate.
Excuse me, a DOUBLE garbage plate.
Email me Badlands and I'll get you the address...but if it can't be shipped, don't worry about it. It's the thought that counts.
Submitted by TigerLilly (user info) at 2005-12-21 11:23:52 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
He'll do it Shlongy. He's a man of his word.
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2005-12-21 11:23:02 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
OH my...Do you think it will ship well?
I'll reimburse you for the shipping if you can find a way to pull this off.
Make it two- all in one container.
Cheeseburger plate, beans and home fries, w/ everything but NO ONIONS. Very important.
Should cost you about $9.
I'll send you a check the minute I receive it.
If this could possibly happen...honestly, I'm already salivating.
Submitted by TigerLilly (user info) at 2005-12-21 11:21:38 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Badlands (user info) at 2005-12-21 11:15:08 (#)
Ranking: 1
Tiger -- Are you really trying to tell me that you're not interested in checking out the latest issues of "Grandmas With Chunky Asses" or "Trailer Trash Titties"?!?! What will I use for foreplay then??
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Badlands: Pst, Katie, come here and look at what I found under the matress.
Katie: WHAT THE FUCK? Did you put those there you sick twisted freak? <looks at cover>
OHMYGOD, I didn't know people did that?!?
No wonder my heart went into overdrive. And here I thought I've seen everything.
Submitted by Badlands (user info) at 2005-12-21 11:18:53 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
Shlongy - cheeseburger plate, everything, mac, homefries??
Get me an address. I'll send you a plate. Honest to Christ, I will.
Submitted by apollo88 (user info) at 2005-12-21 11:17:17 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
had to check the user info to see if it was really you.
most amusing.
Submitted by Badlands (user info) at 2005-12-21 11:15:08 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
Tiger -- Are you really trying to tell me that you're not interested in checking out the latest issues of "Grandmas With Chunky Asses" or "Trailer Trash Titties"?!?! What will I use for foreplay then??
And GLALL -- I got a promotion at work, and haven't had much time to write. Contrary to what some people think...running ALL 4 fryers is really hard work.
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2005-12-21 11:11:36 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Badlands- PuhLEASE send me a fucking Garbage Plate for Xmas. I'm dying here.
Submitted by TigerLilly (user info) at 2005-12-21 11:07:25 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Badlands promise me this though. If you do come to the mountains, don't bring those horrible magazines with you this time. Gaaauuud.
Submitted by Pentameter (user info) at 2005-12-21 11:03:51 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Yay for Brendan!
He's actually a sweetheart once you get to know him.
Submitted by TigerLilly (user info) at 2005-12-21 11:02:29 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Badlands (user info) at 2005-12-21 10:56:39 (#)
Ranking: 1
It's okay Tiger...hanging out with you causes my hands (and fingers) to, uh...wander. I miss you too pretty girl.
And the mountains, eh? I do love to ski...but are you sure an Uber A-lister like yourself would have the time to "associate" with me?
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
You make me bluuuuush! And it would be awesomely awesome if you could go. You would get all of my undivided attention. *wink*
Submitted by GodLovesALittleLovin (user info) at 2005-12-21 10:59:30 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
If Badlands go then I'm not. I hate that guy, he like thinks he's so humble and shit with his good posts and whatnot and not being around forever.
Submitted by Badlands (user info) at 2005-12-21 10:56:39 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
It's okay Tiger...hanging out with you causes my hands (and fingers) to, uh...wander. I miss you too pretty girl.
And the mountains, eh? I do love to ski...but are you sure an Uber A-lister like yourself would have the time to "associate" with me?
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2005-12-21 10:54:38 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
No- in line at the whorehouse.
Submitted by TigerLilly (user info) at 2005-12-21 10:53:18 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Years Old?
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2005-12-21 10:52:24 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Well, we all have our frustrations...I find it sucks always being #243.
Submitted by TigerLilly (user info) at 2005-12-21 10:51:17 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
I hope so. Its frustrating ALWAYS being #1. It's no challenge. Haha..jk
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2005-12-21 10:47:20 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Wow- This is making a run for the top spot- and that's WITHOUT WTH camping on it!
Could this break the TigerLilly stranglehold on Most Heated? Tune in later.
Amazing!
Submitted by TigerLilly (user info) at 2005-12-21 10:41:53 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
BADLANDS....Come to the mountains with us? Can you? Huh? Huh? Can you?
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2005-12-21 10:39:47 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Snuggles the Assassin sure was what they call a "smooth operator".
Submitted by GodLovesALittleLovin (user info) at 2005-12-21 10:37:56 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
I miss the Snuggles/mystia fiasco. That shit was hilarious.
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2005-12-21 10:36:16 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
I've never had so many random people say "good post" and quite frankly, it's making me a bit uncomfortable.
I'm afraid that post number 100 is going to have to be my usual shit-fest/stink-a-thon.
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2005-12-21 10:34:43 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
I mean something else entirely but I'm too sober to share that information at this point in time.
Submitted by TigerLilly (user info) at 2005-12-21 10:32:42 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2005-12-21 10:29:16 (#)
Ranking: 0
Badlands- Take it from Shlongy, TigerLilly has a "thing" for Rochester men.
And that "thing" sure is sweet.
------------------------------------------------------
And by *thing* you mean *Shlongy*. Right?
Submitted by loki (user info) at 2005-12-21 10:29:34 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
He's really at Paris Island? That is hard core dude.
get it, it's a pun
hard core
oh forget it
I'm pretty sure the salt peter thing is an urban legend.
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2005-12-21 10:29:16 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Badlands- Take it from Shlongy, TigerLilly has a "thing" for Rochester men.
And that "thing" sure is sweet.
Submitted by TigerLilly (user info) at 2005-12-21 10:27:25 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Badlands (user info) at 2005-12-21 09:36:28 (#)
Ranking: 1
Submitted by TigerLilly (user info) at 2005-12-21 09:14:03 (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Badlands (user info) at 2005-12-21 08:21:33 (#)
Ranking: 1
It's nice to see that trainwreck's trying to get his life together...I guess.
Not sure how I feel about these "human interest" pieces, though. I was always more partial to your
Andy Rooney op-ed style works. Particularly...
-------------------------------------------------------------
I looooooooooooves me some Badlands.
--------------------------------------------
So, let's make out.
---------------------------------------------
If I leave now, I can be there in what, 5 hours? Ok.
Although I probably shouldn't. Hanging out with you causes my
heart to flip out. ;)
I do miss you though sexy boy.
Submitted by jack11058 (user info) at 2005-12-21 10:26:56 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
good post.
regarding saltpeter, answers.com had this to say: A popular misconception is that potassium nitrate (saltpeter) is an antaphrodisiac and was added to food in all-male institutions. In fact potassium nitrate has no such effect in humans. [1] (http://www.straightdope.com/classics/a3_221.html)
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2005-12-21 10:02:04 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Xcuses (user info) at 2005-12-21 09:52:17 (#)
Ranking: 2
Is this replacing the TMI series?
Yes. It is.
Except that this is the first, and last, installment.
Submitted by Herpes (user info) at 2005-12-21 10:01:42 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Brendan sucks balls...
My balls.
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2005-12-21 10:01:29 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Knock it off MANIC...You love me and you know it.
Your blatant denial of this fact is just oh, so sad.
I'm not sending him a card...I'm copying this POST and sending it to him. I don't have time to write letters. I'm a busy guy.
Now pardon me while I go smoke another cigarette.
Submitted by MANICMOTHER (user info) at 2005-12-21 09:54:59 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
I'm torn between Manicmother's hate for you both and Alesha's being impressed they finally let the little fucker in so I've come up with a compromise.
Champs: Go fuck yourself.
Brendan: Good luck and don't let the MAN get you down.
Submitted by Xcuses (user info) at 2005-12-21 09:52:17 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Is this replacing the TMI series?
Submitted by Grimm (user info) at 2005-12-21 09:49:16 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
"-2 his ass if we ever meet on the street"
Submitted by Jeanneee (user info) at 2005-12-21 09:42:22 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
I loves me some Brendan.
Submitted by inion_de_trua (user info) at 2005-12-21 09:40:07 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
haha, actually playboys are allowed on military installations because they're not hardcore. however, not in boot camp, several guys in my little bro's barracks found that out.
Submitted by Badlands (user info) at 2005-12-21 09:36:28 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
Submitted by TigerLilly (user info) at 2005-12-21 09:14:03 (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Badlands (user info) at 2005-12-21 08:21:33 (#)
Ranking: 1
It's nice to see that trainwreck's trying to get his life together...I guess.
Not sure how I feel about these "human interest" pieces, though. I was always more partial to your
Andy Rooney op-ed style works. Particularly...
-------------------------------------------------------------
I looooooooooooves me some Badlands.
--------------------------------------------
So, let's make out.
Submitted by BLITZKREIG_BOB (user info) at 2005-12-21 09:21:19 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
If you send him a Christmas card, tell him I said 'yo.'
Submitted by BLITZKREIG_BOB (user info) at 2005-12-21 09:19:33 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
I wouldn't. They make you open any packages in front of the drill sergeant. If your mom sends you cookies, they eat them in front of you. If somebody sends you something that you shouldn't have, they take it and put it into a locker. The locker doesn't open until you graduate.
Submitted by CookieLass (user info) at 2005-12-21 09:17:25 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
true or not, I miss Snuggles. *sad panda* he loved my ass more than anybody ever.
Submitted by TigerLilly (user info) at 2005-12-21 09:14:03 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Badlands (user info) at 2005-12-21 08:21:33 (#)
Ranking: 1
It's nice to see that trainwreck's trying to get his life together...I guess.
Not sure how I feel about these "human interest" pieces, though. I was always more partial to your
Andy Rooney op-ed style works. Particularly...
-------------------------------------------------------------
I looooooooooooves me some Badlands.
Submitted by NotSteve (user info) at 2005-12-21 08:59:40 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Fanning the fire.
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2005-12-21 08:56:14 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
BLITZKREIG-BOB- Are you saying that I shouldn't box up a stack of Maxims and send them off? I've actually already thrown the last 12 issues into a box...
I know the boys can take them when they're deployed but I never thought to ask about when in boot camp.
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2005-12-21 08:53:05 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
Submitted by Badlands (user info) at 2005-12-21 08:21:33 (#)
Ranking: 1
It's nice to see that trainwreck's trying to get his life together...I guess.
Not sure how I feel about these "human interest" pieces, though. I was always more partial to your
Andy Rooney op-ed style works. Particularly...
http://www.ubersite.com/m/47978
Yeah- that was a rare good one.
While I agree with you Badlands, I must also confess that since I returned to the work force, I don't have as many "random thoughts" as I did when I was playing cards and golf 24/7.
Every once in a while, you gotta throw the fans a curve ball, just to keep them guessing.
My 100th post is up next...maybe I'll reach into the Shlongy archives for an idea.
Submitted by BLITZKREIG_BOB (user info) at 2005-12-21 08:43:36 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
I'm pretty sure that the only reading material allowed in boot camp are training manuals and religious texts. They'll prolly take any Hustlers that you send him, and then make him do pushups until he pukes for it.
One trick that my girl did for me was she bought me a PT uniform (army workout clothes) and duct taped tobacco products to the insides of the pant legs.
Submitted by hairycoo (user info) at 2005-12-21 08:32:04 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2005-12-21 08:03:37 (#)
Ranking: 0
That's not very nice, hairycoo. He's a fellow poker player.
___
in that case I hope he lives long enough for me to take his money, which wont be hard as he's obviously a poor decision maker
Submitted by FartSmeller (user info) at 2005-12-21 08:22:14 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
It always amazes me to hear real-life stories about the Shlongy. I always picture you sitting holed away in the smoking room of some huge mansion just cruising the internet drinking Scotch all day.
Submitted by Badlands (user info) at 2005-12-21 08:21:33 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
It's nice to see that trainwreck's trying to get his life together...I guess.
Not sure how I feel about these "human interest" pieces, though. I was always more partial to your
Andy Rooney op-ed style works. Particularly...
http://www.ubersite.com/m/47978
Submitted by ess-arr (user info) at 2005-12-21 08:18:04 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2005-12-21 08:03:37 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
That's not very nice, hairycoo. He's a fellow poker player.
Submitted by hairycoo (user info) at 2005-12-21 07:50:31 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
looks just about ready to start blowing up thousands of brown children
seriously, I hope he dies
Submitted by redskieslookfake (user info) at 2005-12-21 06:59:56 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Good work.
Submitted by c1ndy (user info) at 2005-12-21 06:58:13 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
+2 for the picture... but couldn't you have got a nearby soldier to take one of you together?
Submitted by Zoidberg (user info) at 2005-12-21 00:05:31 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
so...he's your boyfriend?
Im confused
Submitted by forensicgirl3 (user info) at 2005-12-20 23:51:11 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Heat
Submitted by Deconstruction (user info) at 2005-12-20 23:41:26 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by Flack (user info) at 2005-12-20 23:32:59 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Marines are dooshbagz!
You shoulda joined the Army.
Submitted by Orgasmatron (user info) at 2005-12-20 23:11:42 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
An according-to-Hoyle post? What won't you do next?
Let it never be said I don't care for the Everyman soldier.
Submitted by PokeyPecker (user info) at 2005-12-20 23:05:53 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
+2 but only because I'm a veteran and I vaugly remember boot camp as a suckfest, boring, tedious and boring. And tedious.
Submitted by Anansie (user info) at 2005-12-20 22:45:01 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
+2 Brendan
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2005-12-20 22:38:20 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
I've done better?
When the fuck was THAT?
Submitted by Unbound (user info) at 2005-12-20 22:28:58 EST (#)
Ranking: -1
you've done better. Either that or I am depressed.
Submitted by prozacaddict (user info) at 2005-12-20 22:28:19 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
http://www.ubersite.com/m/81278
just contributing to the heat....really...that's all i'm doing.
Submitted by Sphagnum (user info) at 2005-12-20 22:26:51 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2005-12-20 22:22:39 (#)
Ranking: 0
I have treid and tried but for some reason, Fagnum just does NOT believe that he's not funny. Ever.
What's it gonna take for you to realize the truth? The usual shitload of -2's and lack of hits isn't convincing enough?
-------
What the fuck are you crapping on about now?
Senility finally caught up with the old windbag, hey?
You're probably referring to the fact that I don't spend every waking moment of my life on this website like you do. There are more interesting things to do like; Bang broads, drink scotch and play golf.
One day you'll get to indulge in one or two of the finer vices.
Until that day - "Go and fuck yourself" as they say in the classics, that you neither appreciate nor understand.
Submitted by forensicgirl3 (user info) at 2005-12-20 22:23:15 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Contributing to the heat.
Shlongy interviews Saxon.....hmmmm, does anyone else think that's a fine idea?
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2005-12-20 22:22:39 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
I have treid and tried but for some reason, Fagnum just does NOT believe that he's not funny. Ever.
What's it gonna take for you to realize the truth? The usual shitload of -2's and lack of hits isn't convincing enough?
Submitted by Sphagnum (user info) at 2005-12-20 22:21:15 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2005-12-20 22:18:58 (#)
Ranking: 0
Awwwww, Fagnum...you pissed because no one wants to interview you?
Tell you what- as soon as ou pull your head out of your ass...AND get laid, we'll sit down for an interview.
Until then, go fuck yourself, matey.
-------
Spending time in any establishment with a raging homo like yourself carries very little appeal for me.
Now stick to what you do best...
Fist-fucking eight year old boys in Taipei.
Submitted by Saxon (user info) at 2005-12-20 22:20:46 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Whoops forgot the +2
Submitted by Saxon (user info) at 2005-12-20 22:20:12 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Good job Shlonger, keep ya shit hard Champs.
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2005-12-20 22:18:58 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Awwwww, Fagnum...you pissed because no one wants to interview you?
Tell you what- as soon as ou pull your head out of your ass...AND get laid, we'll sit down for an interview.
Until then, go fuck yourself, matey.
Submitted by Oleannder (user info) at 2005-12-20 22:16:51 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
http://www.ubersite.com/m/81251
right back at ya! =)
Submitted by Sphagnum (user info) at 2005-12-20 22:15:37 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
You're a fucking beefeater, sparky.
Submitted by Bubba2341 (user info) at 2005-12-20 22:11:17 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
F'Chrissakes, it's like 3:00AM in Brittain, so I guess I gotta stay up late...
Submitted by ih8u2man (user info) at 2005-12-20 22:10:21 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2005-12-20 22:04:40 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
It's already running out of gas...I need the "European contingent" to keep it up and running until the "East Coast I don't do any work for pretty much the entire 8-hour workday" crew comes in tomorrow morning.
Submitted by Bubba2341 (user info) at 2005-12-20 22:02:13 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
I STILL smell heat.
Submitted by full_frontal (user info) at 2005-12-20 22:02:06 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Who the FUCK is the Carver gonna be???
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2005-12-20 21:58:48 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Get it in quick! I'm getting tired of tapping the current crop.
Submitted by full_frontal (user info) at 2005-12-20 21:55:47 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
is it just me or does it seem that shlongy is in LOVE with this Brendan fellow?
Submitted by forensicgirl3 (user info) at 2005-12-20 21:53:04 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
Not all Uber assholes are assbags in real life, sweetie.
I am, but I'm the exception to the rule.
-----------------
But that's why I like you, sugar loins. I've almost completed my application to join "Shlongy's Harem and Chicken Ranch."
Submitted by Crystle (user info) at 2005-12-20 21:50:59 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
I dunno - you may be bored with it, but it seems to generate enough heat.
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2005-12-20 21:48:21 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
But Crystle, hasn't that topic been "done to death"???
Anyway, TL and I exhausted it. Now, we mostly talk about her beave.
Submitted by Crystle (user info) at 2005-12-20 21:46:20 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Shlongy - maybe if you just talked about Tigerlilly's boobs it would be enough...
Submitted by full_frontal (user info) at 2005-12-20 21:44:09 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
BUT THAT DUDE WAS BLACK AND NOT AS BIG AND DIFFERENT HAIR AND NOT A DUDE
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2005-12-20 21:43:09 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Or, on the left side of the page. Whatever.
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2005-12-20 21:42:42 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Also, it'll take a lot more than an interview with Brendan to knock down the cement wall of Most Heated posts that TigerLilly has constructed on the right side of the page.
Perhaps I should have attached the nudie shot of her that she sent me a couple of months ago instead of the picture of the psychotic, yet loveable soon-to-be-Marine.
Submitted by full_frontal (user info) at 2005-12-20 21:42:11 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
HE KIND OF LOOKS LIKE SOME DUDE I FACE-RAPED FOR NOT SAYING "GOD BLESS YOU" AFTER I SNEEZED
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2005-12-20 21:40:14 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Yeah, ForensicSlice...my subject matter is "out there" but MOST people come out of the service as almost normal, productive, if not sedated human beings!
Not all Uber assholes are assbags in real life, sweetie.
I am, but I'm the exception to the rule.
I'd also like to thank MickGinny for stopping by and taking his usual shit in my posts.
I guess the lardass is still bitter about being rejected by every military organization that he tried to enlist in, and that includes the Salvation Army AND The Cub Scouts.
Submitted by joedaddy (user info) at 2005-12-20 21:39:33 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
he has that familar; "what did i sign? i'm sooo fucked!" faraway look in his eyes
Submitted by Unabonger (user info) at 2005-12-20 21:39:04 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
I smell heated.
Submitted by MyNameIsTim (user info) at 2005-12-20 21:38:23 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
i'd send him some tweezers to take care of those eyebrows.
i think plucking eyebrows should never be done, because its gay as fuck, but this defines "extinuating circumstances." consider this the MyNameIsTim approval to tweeze away.
congrats on becoming a marine. go kill some bad guys.
Submitted by forensicgirl3 (user info) at 2005-12-20 21:33:38 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
I'm sur