If I Can’t Tell You From A Bitch (1011 hits)
Category: Quotes & Stories -> PoetryRating: -1 on 26 reviews (Rate this item) (V)
Submitted by Paul Blakeford <paulblakeford1.at.yahoo.com> (View user info) at 2005-12-29 11:06:25 EST
If I Can't Tell You From A Bitch
Brother,
Your braids are too long and your look is too wrong if I
Can't tell you from a bitch
Your jeans are too tight and you ain't looking right if I
Can't tell you from a bitch
The Negro speaks of rivers
Well, I speak of niggaz
Niggaz who look so punkdafied I
Wonder how a woman will walk by their side
White Boy,
Your hair is too long and you dyed it too blonde if I
Can't tell you from a bitch
Your pants are too shiny and your voice is too whiny if I
Can't tell you from a bitch
I think that I shall never see
A man as sissified as thee
Who says he's straight but looks so gay
Did radical feminism make you that way?
New Age Asian,
Your hair is too pretty and you act too siddity if I
Can't tell you from a bitch
You act too soft and your manhood is lost if I
Can't tell you from a bitch
The Tao that can be named
Is not the Real Tao
But you need to learn how
To not look like such a bitch
Fellas,
I'm just a normal man, so please understand
I can't tell y'all from a bitch
With the way gender's bending and sex roles are mending
I can't tell y'all from a bitch
I know why the caged bird sings
If the bird is named Manliness
Someone locked Manliness up and
Melted down the key
paulblakeford.4t.com
User Reviews
Submitted by livEvil (user info) at 2006-10-04 16:52:38 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I liked this one also.
Submitted by apollo88 (user info) at 2006-01-09 13:16:21 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
No Comment
Submitted by redskieslookfake (user info) at 2006-01-09 13:09:13 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
A real shit storm.
Submitted by Misanthropic (user info) at 2006-01-04 13:15:23 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
Yup. Still can't tell you from a 12 year old
Submitted by jagmcmanus (user info) at 2005-12-30 01:43:29 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Sorry for linkwhore, but Whos Coming To Vegas??? http://www.ubersite.com/m/81177
Submitted by Orgasmatron (user info) at 2005-12-29 15:54:27 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
I expect oral on demand, and pies.
Lots of fresh-baked pies.
Oh, and sorry for taking over your post, Lord Byron.
Submitted by Orgasmatron (user info) at 2005-12-29 15:53:54 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
Fine, fine. Wednesday wife it is.
Humbefool can have Thursdays, or that primo Sunday Bi-Curious spot.
Submitted by Sacrilicious (user info) at 2005-12-29 15:22:22 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
Submitted by Orgasmatron (user info) at 2005-12-29 13:21:14 (#)
Ranking: -2
You can be my Thursday wife. How's that sound?
Ladies...there are six spots open.
-------
Can we make it Wednesdays? Thursdays are 'teaching kids to read then stealing souls night'. You'd have to drive and be bored, and I want to give you my undivided attention.
Submitted by Orgasmatron (user info) at 2005-12-29 15:22:04 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
You'll either be my Wednesday Husband, or my Sunday Bisexual Threesome Male.
Submitted by ahumblefool (user info) at 2005-12-29 14:42:39 EST (#)
Ranking: -1
Submitted by Orgasmatron (user info) at 2005-12-29 13:21:14 (#)
Ranking: -2
You can be my Thursday wife. How's that sound?
Ladies...there are six spots open.
_________________________
I'm in!
WTF!
Submitted by Orgasmatron (user info) at 2005-12-29 13:21:14 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
You can be my Thursday wife. How's that sound?
Ladies...there are six spots open.
Submitted by Sacrilicious (user info) at 2005-12-29 13:11:59 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
Submitted by Orgasmatron (user info) at 2005-12-29 11:43:00 (#)
Ranking: -2
If I Can Smell You From the Kitch
--------------------------------------------
I fucking love you, O-Tron- marry me?
Submitted by FartSmeller (user info) at 2005-12-29 12:53:36 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2005-12-29 11:51:07 (#)
Ranking: -2
Throw up a white flag.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Submitted by Orgasmatron (user info) at 2005-12-29 11:43:00 (#)
Ranking: -2
If I Can Smell You From the Kitch
Woman,
Your snatch is unwashed and your pit hair's too long if I
Can smell you from the kitch
Your hair is unclean and your skin's lost it's sheen if I
Can smell you from the kitch
The sink becomes a river
As I smell you and quiver
Quiver and look so petrified I
Wonder how a woman can't wash 'tween her thighs
Son of Mine,
Your boxers are soiled and your face is too oiled if I
Can smell you from the kitch
Your jeans are shit-stained and your gums are inflamed if I
Can smell you from the kitch
I think this kitchen circulates
The smell my family percolates
They say they bathe but smell like wet hay
Did personal hygeine rules go away?
German Shepherd,
Your coat is soaked through and you've eaten my shoe if I
Can smell you from the kitch
Your balls you've neglected and your ears are infected if I
Can smell you from the kitch
The Febreze can be used
It's not fresh air to me
But I need something so
I can breathe while cooking breakfast
Family,
I'm just a normal man, so please understand
I can smell all of you from the kitch
You all reek of eggs and there's dirt on your legs
I can smell all of you from the kitch
I know why the monkey masturbates
Jerkoff frenzy born of frustration
Frustration named Caustic Hobo Stench
Whipping out the juice
bagitbeforeyoutagit.com
Submitted by el_em_en_oh (user info) at 2005-12-29 12:38:40 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Brdn_Nkd (user info) at 2005-12-29 11:53:41 (#)
Ranking: -2
Orgasmatron=quality
Submitted by leilani (user info) at 2005-12-29 12:02:46 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
I FUCKING HATE COMPUTERS, MOTHERFUCKER!!!!!1
that is all.
Submitted by proofofpurchase (user info) at 2005-12-29 11:54:23 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
If I can Smell You from the Kitch was a much more entertaining read.
You benefit from it and get a rank you don't deserve.
Submitted by Brdn_Nkd (user info) at 2005-12-29 11:53:41 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
Orgasmatron=quality
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2005-12-29 11:51:07 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
Throw up a white flag.
Submitted by Orgasmatron (user info) at 2005-12-29 11:43:00 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
If I Can Smell You From the Kitch
Woman,
Your snatch is unwashed and your pit hair's too long if I
Can smell you from the kitch
Your hair is unclean and your skin's lost it's sheen if I
Can smell you from the kitch
The sink becomes a river
As I smell you and quiver
Quiver and look so petrified I
Wonder how a woman can't wash 'tween her thighs
Son of Mine,
Your boxers are soiled and your face is too oiled if I
Can smell you from the kitch
Your jeans are shit-stained and your gums are inflamed if I
Can smell you from the kitch
I think this kitchen circulates
The smell my family percolates
They say they bathe but smell like wet hay
Did personal hygeine rules go away?
German Shepherd,
Your coat is soaked through and you've eaten my shoe if I
Can smell you from the kitch
Your balls you've neglected and your ears are infected if I
Can smell you from the kitch
The Febreze can be used
It's not fresh air to me
But I need something so
I can breathe while cooking breakfast
Family,
I'm just a normal man, so please understand
I can smell all of you from the kitch
You all reek of eggs and there's dirt on your legs
I can smell all of you from the kitch
I know why the monkey masturbates
Jerkoff frenzy born of frustration
Frustration named Caustic Hobo Stench
Whipping out the juice
bagitbeforeyoutagit.com
Submitted by MyNameIsTim (user info) at 2005-12-29 11:33:38 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
not so much bad, as it was godawful
Submitted by BLITZKREIG_BOB (user info) at 2005-12-29 11:20:10 EST (#)
Ranking: -1
Quiet, you.
Submitted by Brdn_Nkd (user info) at 2005-12-29 11:16:57 EST (#)
Ranking: -1
Um ok. I guess it's not horrible but it's none too special either.
Bitch
Submitted by Jeanneee (user info) at 2005-12-29 11:16:49 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
PS - Def Poetry Jam called. The answer is no.
Submitted by Jeanneee (user info) at 2005-12-29 11:15:54 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
You've got some sex issues.
Submitted by psychabillyjean (user info) at 2005-12-29 11:12:53 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
A new song by Cowboy Troy?
Submitted by el_em_en_oh (user info) at 2005-12-29 11:11:56 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
*Meh*
Can't wait for Orgasmatron to get hold of this one...