My Day With Bluetooth (826 hits)
Category: NoneRating: -1.76 on 31 reviews (Rate this item) (V)
Submitted by ASW (View user info) at 2006-01-27 11:04:58 EST
When my Mobile phone got stolen overseas, i thought i would finaly go out and buy the top of the range phone, instead of waiting to be given a 2nd hand phone by a friend who he stole from a seed night club (We have all had the hand me down phone before) Dont get my wrong i love free stuff but it comes a time in your life you want something brand new!
So, moving along i went to the phone store and i and asked the man at the desk what would be a nice phone for everyday use, yet still wanted it to be a pimping arse phone, in the end we both agreed on the Samsung D600, Now This phone is sleek, useful & just complete sex! And Worth every penny, and i shall tell you why.
After i bought the phone i took it to my car and i riped it out of the box, smashed my sim card in and with the 25% Battery they give you i turned her on, and she Roared to live with bright lights and happy sounds that remind you of that one night in bangkok with a ladie that wasn't quite a lady nor quite a boy. So im excited at this point called a friend up and asked him to meet me for breakfast at a little cafe just around the corner from my house, he agreed, so off i went!
So we are both comparing phones and talking Gizmo Tech for hours on end, untill the funnyest day of my life was about to occour, there it was on my phone Bluetooth - Serch For Devices, & it was off serching away....Serching...Serching... Ding! "Mich" Someone in the cafe had there bluetooth on, im looking around to see who has there phone on the table...no one, so i thought i would get a bit creative in the full cafe with Conversations Flying left and right and waitress's stressing.
So i yell out..."Mich"
and nothing not a thing, yet this 48 year old women sitting next to us with saggy tits and lip stick smired on her lips that look like they have been Sand Blasted away.
So i go again..."Mich"
Yet again, not a thing, the old lady is still smiling, and the noise im causing.
So i remand Quite for a while... and i serched again, "Mich" still had his/hers Bluetooth on.
So Back into Gizmo and Tech Conversation with my friend and a few Coffee's i was busting to pee, so i stumbel out of my chair and do that half walk/run where its like trying to not be seen yet, but if you dont move ill pee down your leg strut, & i make it to the Toilet with phone in hand.
it is only a 1-Person at a time toilet, so i start to pee, and i have my phone and in my head im thinking...Do it...Just Do it...I finsh peeing and i hold my balls in one hand, and Camrea in the other and Clicked away... making my way back to the No menu screen i see, Serch For Devices Again.......And i thought to my self i wonder if "mich" is still out there, its got around a 1metre rang, and i am only 9 metres from the front door, so he could be anywhere if i picked him up sitting in the middle of the cafe, so here i go...Serching...Serching..."Mich" Found, and i laugh to my self, scoll into my photos and look at the picture of my balls in my hand, Select..Send Via...BlueTooth....Sending Sending........SENT
Holly Shit Mich Accepted a picture of my Nads taken from the Public Toilet.
I Escape the bathroom and walk over my friends table, and we thought we should send him something else so we can see who picks up there phone in the cafe, So My friend Serches for Devices....Serching...Serching...."mich" Picked just a Default Picture and sent!
Here a beep towards the front door right next to the main street window, a young guy no old then 18 picks up his phone looks around and Accpets, and goes back to eating...
So me and my friend are in tears on how funny this is right now, so we pay the bill and gather all our items on the table, and start walking to wards the door we exit and just before we pass him on the out side of the glass i pull out my balls wack them on the window and knock on it, and i swear to god his face turned from im enjoying my breakfast and a touch of how did i get a dirty picture sent to me in a cafe, to Holly shit i have just been Visualy Raped By Bluetooth!!!!!
Who Ever Invented Bluetooth should win would a Nobel Prize.
User Reviews
Submitted by Maddog (user info) at 2006-01-28 15:46:26 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
So, how is life as an Indian telemarketer?
Submitted by Nockane (user info) at 2006-01-28 15:21:44 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
I can look past spelling and grammar, but this story sucked regardless..
Submitted by crazyaardvark (user info) at 2006-01-28 02:11:30 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
You are fucking disgusting. Not only that, but your incredibly bad grammar and punctuation labels you a halfwit. People like you are the reason I hate selling phones.
If you are going to put a picture of your tiny penis on Uber, give us a NSFW first, idiot.
Submitted by KatHunter (user info) at 2006-01-27 18:12:46 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
No Comment
Submitted by icarus1987 (user info) at 2006-01-27 17:49:08 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
My neighbor's dog shits better material than this and he has worms.
Submitted by JonnyX (user info) at 2006-01-27 16:19:52 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
what are you, a gook?
Submitted by cuberat (user info) at 2006-01-27 15:36:26 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
Paging Lorena Bobbit....
Submitted by Off_The_Wagon (user info) at 2006-01-27 14:45:20 EST (#)
Ranking: -1
bravo.
http://www.ubersite.com/m/83029
Submitted by pen_name (user info) at 2006-01-27 14:12:01 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
it took me a minute to realize what i was looking at. deez nuts, indeed.
Submitted by skrapmetal (user info) at 2006-01-27 14:10:09 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
This is crap. Poorly written using pooly spelled words which are placed in poorly arranged order and poorly punctuated.
[(1.4142i)^2]Expire
Submitted by digdug (user info) at 2006-01-27 11:51:21 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
Did your parents disallow you any schooling or education?
Or is your IQ just less than 20?
Submitted by Orgasmatron (user info) at 2006-01-27 11:49:05 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
Nothing since July of last year and this is your best effort?
You should have kept your non-posting streak alive.
Submitted by alfakyle (user info) at 2006-01-27 11:45:47 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
1) as stated before me: NSFW would've been nice
2) the D600 is not the top of the line, newest/best handset
3) which carrier do you subscribe to? most GSM carriers (worldwide) reserve the right to terminate your service (and charge termination fees) if you are found to be using a handset that is not compatible with their network (however the D600 is quadband) AND programmed with the carrier's preferred roaming database. hope you get shut off.
4) grow up.
Submitted by redskieslookfake (user info) at 2006-01-27 11:44:14 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
NSFW - the rest of the post I will ignore. that cannot stand
Submitted by HighVoltage900 (user info) at 2006-01-27 11:40:28 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
Just because I hate you that much.
Submitted by Iago (user info) at 2006-01-27 11:37:49 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Heh, ive always wanted to do that, but i dont have the balls.
-dont have the balls, get it?
-its a pun, right?
-it a good joke, right?
-i think its teh funny
-.. oh forget it.
Submitted by LiquidPaper (user info) at 2006-01-27 11:34:46 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
dude? who wants to see a picture of your nutsack? faggot.
Submitted by Sacrilicious (user info) at 2006-01-27 11:33:40 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
AUTO -2 I just got promoted WOO
Submitted by Axolotl (user info) at 2006-01-27 11:32:14 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
Let's aim for worst ever! Wooo
Submitted by dove666 (user info) at 2006-01-27 11:31:28 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
OUCH...WARES MEYE BUCKNIFE!
Submitted by weasul (user info) at 2006-01-27 11:30:22 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
I couldn't even get all the way through this.
Submitted by Nellypaal (user info) at 2006-01-27 11:28:31 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
How do I even begin to express with words the pure, malevolent spite I feel towards you right now?
I guess that'll have to do.
Submitted by proofofpurchase (user info) at 2006-01-27 11:26:54 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
Please serch for the korrect speling of idiyaht
Submitted by Razor (user info) at 2006-01-27 11:25:56 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
Damnit I clicked because it had a pure -2 rating... that's what I get...
Submitted by OldManTeething (user info) at 2006-01-27 11:21:50 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
You need to be banned from the entire internet.
Submitted by saint_sebastian (user info) at 2006-01-27 11:15:24 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
+4 for being brave enough to send a photo of something so small...must be one hell of a digital zoom zoom.
-2 for being a cunt and not putting NSFW on the title...now I'm going to have to send a copy of this to my boss and tell him that it was an accident, and she probably won't like it because you're balls remind her of me...except mine are bigger.
-2 for the poor grammar
-2 for poor spelling
= -2 for the post - brave...try again.
That is all.
Submitted by CaptainThorns (user info) at 2006-01-27 11:12:07 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
God, this was awful. And, as already stated, sans NSFW label.
Submitted by Mike00295 (user info) at 2006-01-27 11:12:02 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
Your mother seems to be gaining weight.
Submitted by Foolproof (user info) at 2006-01-27 11:10:29 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
NSFW you worthless fucking cunt.
Submitted by HighVoltage900 (user info) at 2006-01-27 11:10:10 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
Everything is wrong with this. FIRST OFF NSFW YOU STUPID BLEEDING CUNT!
Second off, ENGLISH!!! SPEAK IT MOTHER FUCKER!
Third, I hate you.
Submitted by WildcatMcGee (user info) at 2006-01-27 11:10:09 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
Gay.