photo of a ceramic virgin mary figurine miraculously swallowing a stream of jism gushing from my penis (1114 hits)
Category: NoneRating: -0.32 on 24 reviews (Rate this item) (V)
Submitted by shandythedog (View user info) at 2006-01-28 07:49:34 EST
stranger danger
stranger danger
dormez vous
dormez vous
a baby in a manger
a baby in a manger
ding dong dell
ding dong dell
***
i have eaten so many sausages lately it's not funny
***
i was going to take lots of photos, but the battery ran out and as fate would have it the spare battery was also expired.
***
roger federer versus the greek cunt with the dazzling girlfriend. i wouldn't mind watching that. may be busy looking after the child though. or hiding out somewhere to avoid visitors.
***
i hope stin reads this, she hates this kind of thing, stupid whore. actually, most people hate this kind of thing. i should give it a snappier title so more of them are sucked into reading it. the current title is "before i lay my weary head down i thought i might as well share something with ubersite". i will now change it to something catchier.
*
i would show you the photo i took but i can't be bothered downloading it from the fuckign camera. also, it is just the side of a truck that drove past while i was on holidays. nothing to do with ceramic statues at all. it's just a coincidence that my new snappy title mentions photos as well.
*
i wonder if a woman will ever cuddle me again (for free, i mean). perhaps even hold hands with me in a shopping mall.
*
in summary, in conclusion, to wrap things up nicely, may i just say:
stranger danger
stranger danger
dormez vous
dormez vous
a baby in a manger
a baby in a manger
ding dong dell
ding dong dell
(i would attach a sound file of this song, which includes a brilliant frere jacques acoustic guitar solo by my collaborator, and the best maniacal giggling ever recorded, but the cunt has the tape)
ps - the other night i met two people who are apparently illiterate - they were the most interesting and amusing folks i've met in yonks. and they laughed at my jokes. i think they might actually have liked me!
no point in getting too excited about it though, people always let you down.
except whores of course - they can be relied on, generally speaking. and the people who make sausage dinners in country pubs, they seem pretty solid.
pps- have you heard about teflon? apparently it's a deadly poison. lucky i had the car radio on to pick that info up, eh? OTHERWISE I MIGHT HAVE BEEN ABLE TO ENJOY MY FUCKING FREE RANGE FRIED EGGS IN PEACE FOR THE REST OF MY LIFE.
User Reviews
Submitted by GuinnessSince1759 (user info) at 2006-01-29 21:20:46 EST (#)
Ranking: -1
I'm not in the mood.
Submitted by Foonbo (user info) at 2006-01-29 14:25:07 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
Lying makes baby Jeebus cry.
Submitted by Axolotl (user info) at 2006-01-29 13:54:12 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
dammit
Submitted by forensicgirl3 (user info) at 2006-01-28 22:16:46 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
There exists a very small minority of users on this site that, when upon reading their posts, I very much desire to park my car on their face.
You are one of that small minority.
Congratulations.
Submitted by Kale (user info) at 2006-01-28 22:15:38 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
What was the point of this?
Submitted by polyamorousaj (user info) at 2006-01-28 21:36:01 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by the_lone_stranger (user info) at 2006-01-28 17:17:20 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Where is my spunky icon?!
Submitted by pen_name (user info) at 2006-01-28 16:36:35 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
tease
Submitted by GodLovesALittleLovin (user info) at 2006-01-28 13:57:18 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
"no point in getting too excited about it though, people always let you down.
except whores of course - they can be relied on, generally speaking. and the people who make sausage dinners in country pubs, they seem pretty solid."
Submitted by MyOwnLittleWorld (user info) at 2006-01-28 13:24:14 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Circe (user info) at 2006-01-28 09:59:20 (#)
Ranking: 0
The angel, the elephant, the hippo... all of them masterpieces.
I feel deprived.
Submitted by Herpes (user info) at 2006-01-28 12:24:03 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Remembering the absurdity of the hippo shot caused me to smirk, and then chuckle...
+2 on that.
Submitted by Bubba2341 (user info) at 2006-01-28 11:46:09 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
Teflon is good for you. YOU should eat a lot of it.
Submitted by PokeyPecker (user info) at 2006-01-28 11:27:48 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Why the fuck not?
Submitted by Sphagnum (user info) at 2006-01-28 11:23:39 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
Moron
Submitted by r1nce (user info) at 2006-01-28 10:06:51 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
No photo. Liar!
Submitted by Circe (user info) at 2006-01-28 09:59:20 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
The angel, the elephant, the hippo... all of them masterpieces.
I feel deprived.
Submitted by OneCheapGeek (user info) at 2006-01-28 09:19:32 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by rad1101 (user info) at 2006-01-28 08:10:56 (#)
Ranking: 0
I can't be the only one who remembered the hippo and wanted to see one of those godless catholic's idols spewed upon.
right?
Submitted by belowground (user info) at 2006-01-28 08:14:07 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by rad1101 (user info) at 2006-01-28 08:10:56 (#)
Ranking: 0
I can't be the only one who remembered the hippo and wanted to see one of those godless catholic's idols spewed upon.
right?
============================
Unsure about hippos or how the fuck they play into this, but i'm all for idols getting spewed upon.
Submitted by rad1101 (user info) at 2006-01-28 08:14:02 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
use a plastic spatula when cooking your eggs.
Submitted by shandythedog (user info) at 2006-01-28 08:12:52 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
apparently there is talk of banning teflon
and if anyone finds this post disappointing, imagine how i feel. i'm 3/4 of the way through a novel called 'the human stain' and still nothing much about jism.
off to bed now
Submitted by rad1101 (user info) at 2006-01-28 08:10:56 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
I can't be the only one who remembered the hippo and wanted to see one of those godless catholic's idols spewed upon.
right?
Submitted by belowground (user info) at 2006-01-28 08:04:45 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
I chuckled at this, but I guess i'd have laughed at anything being at work on a Saturday morning. Fascist bosses can lick my seven.
Also,
pps- have you heard about teflon? apparently it's a deadly poison.
This bears investigating.
Submitted by shandythedog (user info) at 2006-01-28 08:03:30 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
hahaaaahahahhhahhhahahah!!
excellent news rad.
Submitted by rad1101 (user info) at 2006-01-28 08:01:28 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
im sorely disappointed.