Sushi and Kikes (450 hits)
Category: NoneRating: -0.85 on 14 reviews (Rate this item) (V)
Submitted by sicosemen (View user info) at 2006-01-30 10:14:24 EST
I spent my past weekend in Baltimore, MD, home of the needle injecting city rats. These rats are really the size of small dogs, well inbetween small dogs and large cats. During the winter you rarely get to witness the spectacle of the rat. This weekend, however, temperatures were "short-sleev" if you will, and I saw several rats ramsack Fells Point for the needles left curbside. Ahh, beautiful ole' Charm City.
I met my buddy Chris, who is an old college buddy along with my other 2 friends and one of his girlfriends for a great show. Chris is a drummer in a band and he put on quite a show Friday night at a place called Sonar. For any of you familiar with Baltimore, Sonar is across the street from Hammerjacks. Needless to say, liquor enbibed fun was had by all. Take a look at www.savoryjames.com and furthermore go to their myspace link and listen to the music. It is SFW so no need to worry.
During the debauchery we made this weekend, I stumbled upon an old shirt concept with which we(alliteration) ran ridiculously rampant(alliteration again adds awesomness). It was a T-shirt that took the "Jesus was my homeboy" concept and spoofed it making something along the lines of "Jesus was a kike." I, personally found this highly entertaining however, most would find it highly offensive. After the harbor ESPN zone, Hooters, and the Art Museum, we decided that some sushi would be a good note to leave on.
We go to a sushi bar in fells point right off broadway where we find the nicest, sweetest, Asian lady as our host and waitress. She really reminded me of Miss Swan off SNL with her accent and constant reminders of her culture. We were seated with a minum of 20 bows and approximately 17 nods. I could tell she was literally off the boat. She was so sweet and understood English fair enough to make me have a soft spot for her. Not to mention the pitchers of beer specials at Hooters and ESPN zone; which on a sidebar--why don't museums serve alcohol? They could make it a much more interesting spectator "sport" of sorts. It was when Jon asked her for sake that really made me appreciate her. "No, sorry no serve sake, but, BYOB and liquor store across street, see(while pointing)." I figure Jon will come back with some sake not because he's an Asian (Filipino to be exact) but because we are eating sushi. Nope, no such luck. Jon comes back with Jim Beam and we drank profusely. This led to the complete mutilation of the forementioned word: Kike.
I won't apologize in advance but will tell you that if you get upset at racial indiscriminations easily, discontinue to read. Cease and desist. So we've come up with the following instances, occasions, sayings, etc. in which you can insert the word Kike.
+Growing up, I had a hard time learning to ride the Kikecyle.
+Everyone will say that the best pair of basketball shoes are the Kike Shox.
+While skiing we particularly enjoy the skikelift for its convenience.
+You guys are a bunch of kikesuckers.
+Ben Franklin learned about electricity from flying a kike with a key attached to it.
+"Holy schkikes" R.I.P.-Chris Farley-
+After becoming an octagenarian Mr. Williams finally kiked the bucket.
+Matt was the brunt of the joke when he discovered his "Kike ME!" sign on his back.
+Use caution and a potholder when pulling the cake out. It's kiking hot.
+City skikelines are amazing, especially at night.
+I think I'm going to switch my insurance to KikeO.
+We were able to see KikeO the whale before they set him free.
+Two wrongs don't make a kike.
We had a lot more but I'm unable to recollect them all. See if you can come up with any that I haven't. I'll let you know.
I leave you with an Eskimo Inuit necessity.
User Reviews
Submitted by GetNakeddd (user info) at 2007-03-01 10:46:19 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
Miss Swann of MadTV, you kikegobbler
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2006-01-30 20:32:52 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
You're easily amused.
Dipshits usually are.
Submitted by no1hasdis (user info) at 2006-01-30 11:46:17 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
It's not because you're rascist, it's because you're a bore and suck at life. Please feel free to die, shitstain.
Submitted by congo (user info) at 2006-01-30 11:10:45 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
Miss Swan of SNL?
Submitted by cat_head (user info) at 2006-01-30 11:08:42 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
You're guessing that I'm Jewish because I didn't approve of this? You infant.
Submitted by badassmofo (user info) at 2006-01-30 11:02:38 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
if I sound out your username I come up with 'sick of semen'?
well just stop sucking cock ya dumbass
Submitted by sicosemen (user info) at 2006-01-30 10:58:24 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
I'm going to throw this out there and say cat_head is a Jewbulee Trouper.
Submitted by sicosemen (user info) at 2006-01-30 10:52:44 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by badassmofo (user info) at 2006-01-30 10:29:30 (#)
Ranking: -1
Thought process
"I only have blog worthy material to write"
"I saw on the current most heated list that the all time heated post was antisemetic"
"Copy idea, change to appear original"
"Submit"
"Failure"
/-/-/-/-/-/-/-/-/-/-/-/-/-/-/-/-/
Wrong + Wrong + Wrong= YOU are a Kikesucker. Please hurry up and kike the bucket. I don't read the most heated and if I copy anything I clearly tell you ahead of time. Sorry, but you are wrong, now choke on a sea of cocks.
Submitted by cat_head (user info) at 2006-01-30 10:51:05 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
Kike = Jew.
Racist: -2
Utterly unfunny: -2
You seem like a stupid cock: -2
Fuck you.
Submitted by Tyrone_Washington (user info) at 2006-01-30 10:34:23 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Sorry, I didn't even bother to read your post. But I have to +2 the title.
Submitted by badassmofo (user info) at 2006-01-30 10:29:30 EST (#)
Ranking: -1
Thought process
"I only have blog worthy material to write"
"I saw on the current most heated list that the all time heated post was antisemetic"
"Copy idea, change to appear original"
"Submit"
"Failure"
Submitted by Nellypaal (user info) at 2006-01-30 10:20:11 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Someone please save me the trouble and explain kike.
I'm sure this was hilarious.
Submitted by BLITZKREIG_BOB (user info) at 2006-01-30 10:18:25 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
INCOMING!
Submitted by HighVoltage900 (user info) at 2006-01-30 10:18:18 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
The pic made me smile. I will order 7 of them from Amazon.com.