I, Human part 8: The original green death fucking flavor (381 hits)
Category: Business & FinancialRating: 0.75 on 4 reviews (Rate this item) (V)
Submitted by A-Daamage and the flaming chipmunks of tomorrow (View user info) at 2006-02-01 06:59:19 EST
http://www.ubersite.com/m/62726 - part 1: Desolation
http://www.ubersite.com/m/62785 - part 2: Passion
http://www.ubersite.com/m/63538 - part 3: Confusion
http://www.ubersite.com/m/66740 - part 4: Decision
http://www.ubersite.com/m/68469 - part 5: Resolution
http://www.ubersite.com/m/77277 - part 6: Detachment
http://www.ubersite.com/m/82706 - part 7: Exanimate
Hi, my name is Adam and I've done the following things, not necessarily in order or necessarily as seperate events, to pass the time as I await the arrival of my copy of the Devin Townsend Band - Synchestra Special Edition CD (jewel case):
1. Shot a gerbil out of a cannon through the patio windows of my house at passers-by.
2. Yelled great obscenities at elderly people while running through the Bingo hall.
3. Set the building on fire.
4. Because they took my stapler.
5. Built up the guts to take a swing at Chuck Norris.
6. Abruptly lost all feeling in my body as Chuck's foot severed my torso from my lower body.
7. Saw the light, was about to go toward it, but woke up with blinding, itchy-burny pain across my stomach as Chuck resurrected me with the power of the Texas Ranger.
8. Took Nicolas Cage hostage until everyone admitted that he can't act.
9. Focused the will of my mind to bend the laws of nature and reality so as to accelerate the course of time only to realize that not only does time not exist, but that typing a message while under the influence of NyQuil (we love you, you giant fucking Q) is hazardous to the sanity of all and may very well contribute to the violent tectonic upheaval of the foundations of my good sense. May the Lord (Calvert) be with you. And also with you. It's the San Fransisco treat.
....what?
User Reviews
Submitted by RamJetMax (user info) at 2006-02-01 10:37:59 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
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Submitted by Pentameter (user info) at 2006-02-01 08:47:17 (#)
Ranking: 2
Auto +2 for Denis Leary..."No Cure for Cancer" is top notch as far as comedy goes.
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Submitted by Pentameter (user info) at 2006-02-01 08:47:17 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Auto +2 for Denis Leary..."No Cure for Cancer" is top notch as far as comedy goes.
Submitted by cat_head (user info) at 2006-02-01 08:22:22 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
Desperately unfunny.
And Cage can act like a motherfucker.
Submitted by Off_The_Wagon (user info) at 2006-02-01 07:08:13 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
If you don't think Cage can act, you obviously haven't seen "Peggy Sue Got Married."