UberTines : I'm in the Mood For Love (778 hits)
Category: NoneRating: 2 on 18 reviews (Rate this item) (V)
Submitted by Davros (View user info) at 2006-02-03 16:35:34 EST
Professor Joseph Schmidt remained seated behind his desk although his last students of the day had long ago departed. He glanced down at the memo that had been so casually left in his pigeon hole and decided that it was time to act. Gathering his papers together, he crammed them carelessly into his attaché case and walked out to his car.
Almost on auto pilot, he arrived at the roadhouse just outside of town. He liked this place even though he didn't really fit in with the regular clientele. Here he was just Joe. That was one of the problems of living in a small college town, everyone knew each others business. As he walked through the door he could see Hitch, the bartender, already reaching into the cooler.
"The usual Joe?".
His assent nodded, he took up position in his usual stool and dropped three singles on the bar. It was quiet in the bar, most of the drinkers still to arrive. Only a few die-hards nursing flat draught beer occupied other seats and they were too far gone to do more than raise a hand in greeting.
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Fifteen years of teaching in the community college had left Joe in a strangely comfortable rut. He supposed some of his colleagues thought he lacked ambition and he was quick to support that idea. He enjoyed his reputation as a slightly eccentric character, some kind of a throwback to the radical teachers of the sixties because despite his quirks, he had their respect. Teaching the classes that no one else wanted would earn you a degree of that, but being successful in those same classes, which some of the younger students harshly called "Reading and Writing for Retards", earned respect but also gave him a great deal of satisfaction. It was his private life that he suspected, no, he knew they would talk about him.
It just didn't seem right to them that a man about to reach fifty should not be married. Even worse was that he never had been. He had been engaged once, before he worked in this town, but that didn't work out. The image that he cultivated for himself was that of a solitary man who enjoyed his own company.
In the half light of the roadhouse, Joe Schmidt admitted to himself what he could never confess to his colleagues. He was lonely. There was something missing from his life. He needed someone.
Reaching into his attaché case, he removed the memo and stared at it.
"Annual Faculty Valentines Social. Friday 14 February "
For fifteen years he had been attending this function, along with all of the others at Christmas and Graduations, alone. This year he decided things were going to be different.
Draining his beer, he walked out to the car and started the short drive home.
------------
The oldies station playing quietly in the background broke to another commercial and Joe picked up the telephone. The number was circled in the directory but he knew it by heart. If it wasn't this time, then he knew his courage would fail.
"Hello, Perfect Dates Escort Agency. How can I help?"
Joe swallowed back the lump in his throat. " I am looking for a someone to accompany me to a social event on Valentines day."
"Certainly sir. I just need you to answer a few questions so that we can arrange everything for you."
------------
For the first time that any of his colleagues and students remembered, Professor Schmidt left work early.
Arriving home he rushed to shower and shave, before changing into his hired tuxedo.
As the time of his dates arrival grew closer, Joe became more and more nervous, constantly adjusting his bow tie and straightening the crease in his trousers. When the doorbell rang, he almost didn't answer, but plucking every last ounce of courage he opened the door.
When he saw the vision in the doorway, he was unable to speak. Joe stood for what seemed like an eternity, before the silence was broken.
"Well, are you going to invite me in?"
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The social passed in a blur for Joe.
The amazed looks on the faces of the faculty when confronted with this stunning creature. Their shock at the difference in his demeanour, he had allowed himself to drink a little more than usual and had led the dancing with his partner. Now, sitting in the cab with his date, Joe was sorry that the night was almost over.
--------------
Back at the house after a nightcap, Joe stood to escort his date to the door.
"You paid for the night, is there anything else you wanted?"
He blushed, "I've never really done..."
"I guessed."
----------------
He allowed himself to be led to the bedroom and undressed. His hands explored the strange body and felt the exploration reciprocated. When he felt the tongue on his penis, he could hold back no longer.
Embarrassed, he began to apologise, only to be pulled close and kissed as he had never been kissed before.
At the moment of the first penetration, Joe realised what he had been missing for all these years and wondered why he had waited so long to experience this feeling. Finally, both sated, they fell asleep spooning, drenched in sweat and bodily fluids.
-----------------
When Joe awoke, the bed was empty. Pulling on his robe he went through the house to the kitchen. Laying on the table was a note.
" I had a great time last night. It was much more than work for me. If you ever want to get together (off the books) give me a call."
Joe allowed himself a wry smile, before saying aloud to the empty room.
"I think I will. I really think I will Peter."
-----------------
-Dave
User Reviews
Submitted by Jeanneee (user info) at 2006-02-07 13:45:50 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
This post is on Most Recently Reviewed and the title is cut off so it says "I'm in the Moo..." HAHAHAHA MOOOO
Submitted by simple_catalyst (user info) at 2006-02-07 13:36:54 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
"That was a good drum break
I feel like making love to all the men tonight
Yeah, yeah, it's a beautiful night
Making love to every guy in sight
(Every)
Yeah, yeah, it's a beautiful night
Yeah, a night
Lots of cute guys in the club tonight
(You're not kidding)
Lots of juicy asses hangin' out
What's your name?
(Like I've told you before)
As I've said so many times before
I don't wanna play no games
Don't wanna play no games with you tonight
But I tend to be a loner
So when you get up in the morning
I may not be there
I don't care if you disrespect me
Just so you love me"
Submitted by CaptainThorns (user info) at 2006-02-07 08:15:18 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by TigerLilly (user info) at 2006-02-04 15:19:18 (#)
Ranking: 2
Very nice.
And on a sidenote, I've saved your voice mail. I listened to it earlier today. :)
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
The same one from Ubercon: London?
Ahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha!!!!! :)
Nice job on this, Dave!
Submitted by Deconstruction (user info) at 2006-02-06 18:46:52 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by mikethescottish (user info) at 2006-02-06 18:37:00 (#)
Ranking: 2
Didn't see that coming
Submitted by mikethescottish (user info) at 2006-02-06 18:37:00 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Didn't see that coming, though it was cleverly signposted. An excellent piece of writing.
Submitted by TigerLilly (user info) at 2006-02-04 15:19:18 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Very nice.
And on a sidenote, I've saved your voice mail. I listened to it earlier today. :)
Submitted by Bubba2341 (user info) at 2006-02-04 15:08:05 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Excellent writing, Dave. Call me naive, but I wasn't expecting
the twist at the end.
Submitted by munkeypants (user info) at 2006-02-04 14:51:47 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
You could have touched on his inner thoughts more.
Who is Peter?
This was good. I am glad this was a happy ending for him.
Sounds like he needed one. (happy ending, i mean)
Submitted by RonArtestPunch (user info) at 2006-02-04 14:44:26 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
I believe this is the first happy ending in this contest, +2 4 U.
Submitted by c1ndy (user info) at 2006-02-04 05:40:47 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
great
Submitted by inion_de_trua (user info) at 2006-02-03 17:37:33 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
that's awesome.
Submitted by The_Yellow_Dart (user info) at 2006-02-03 17:22:26 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
These ubertines are awesome stuff.
Submitted by Brdn_Nkd (user info) at 2006-02-03 16:50:00 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Nicely done.
Submitted by ghola (user info) at 2006-02-03 16:49:33 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
good shit.
you've got me beat.
Submitted by Orgasmatron (user info) at 2006-02-03 16:49:13 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
I really try not to guess at what's going to unfold as I read something. Makes for a better journey, I find. However, for some reason, when I got here:
"It just didn't seem right to them that a man about to reach fifty should not be married."
I thought "Hmm...I wonder if he's gay." Not that this ruined it for me whatsoever.
I thought of Kevin Spacey with that line, and then made the connection. Strange.
Anyway, I enjoyed this. Liked the pieces, the flow, and the turn at the end. It was neither too descriptive nor too brief. You could have really delved into a lot of things here - his personal life, previous Valentines Day events he'd attended - but that would have really bogged things down.
Great job.
Submitted by redskieslookfake (user info) at 2006-02-03 16:45:12 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Sepp Blatter has just told me to fuck off re. World Cup tickets. It is physically to rate this. I never want to +2 again.
Submitted by Jacobt26 (user info) at 2006-02-03 16:43:25 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
The dudes gay?
Pretty entertaining, even for a homo-erotic post.
Submitted by MistressFist (user info) at 2006-02-03 16:39:03 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Attn: ghey menz.