Fucking Tigerlilly! (1378 hits)
Category: RomanceRating: 0.8 on 49 reviews (Rate this item) (V)
Submitted by GodChicken <Monty> (View user info) at 2006-02-15 14:48:34 EST
You sick bitch!
I thought we had something special.
Ever since we first met in Vegas I felt that thrill, but now I recognize it.
It was the rare moment of skin to skin contact, and it felt so good that I was addicted. Granted, if you stab around wildly for long enough, you're going to feel SOMETHING, no matter the gaping maw you are falling into.
Jesus, my heart beat so fast.. I thought it was excitement but really it was fear that the board I strapped across my ass would slip and I would fall into your Black Hole, you fucking Maximillian hose-beast.
How could you leave me for him? You never complained about the whole hotdog-down-the-hallway thing before, as long as I pulled out.. I got news for ya, that stuff isn't as good for your skin as you think it is. Does he give you more? is that it? When you get tired of him, come back to me. I love spelunking.
I love you and I always will.
User Reviews
Submitted by hot_pocket (user info) at 2007-01-15 14:16:50 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
mmmm lilly
Submitted by Maltese (user info) at 2007-01-15 13:30:35 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by Crystle (user info) at 2006-02-16 17:14:58 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
<SOB>
NOW you tell me Monty?
Tiger - you broke his heart, but you crushed mine!!
Submitted by GuinnessSince1759 (user info) at 2006-02-16 03:07:21 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
http://www.ubersite.com/m/84024
Submitted by HawthorneHeights (user info) at 2006-02-16 01:08:15 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
This was fucking stupid.
Next time how about a little fucking story.
Idiot.
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2006-02-15 16:38:29 EST (#)
Ranking: -1
Submitted by TigerLilly (user info) at 2006-02-15 15:28:23 (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Method (user info) at 2006-02-15 15:26:51 (#)
Ranking: 2
i hate that bitch, she broke my heart
HAHAHAHA..you're such an ass. I did no such thing.
Really, Method?
I broke her hymen.
Submitted by precision (user info) at 2006-02-15 16:04:54 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Method (user info) at 2006-02-15 15:30:05 (#)
Ranking: 2
deny it all you want, you homewrecker, but you've scarred me for life
=============================
thats why we use a "safety word"
Submitted by ruthless (user info) at 2006-02-15 16:03:50 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Oh Monty, you silly man.
Submitted by _Aries_ (user info) at 2006-02-15 16:00:45 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Oops I just shot myself in the nipple. Can someone call my mom for me
Submitted by TigerLilly (user info) at 2006-02-15 15:34:24 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Shadow you haven't been around in a while. Let me catch you up to speed. I've broken many hearts here at Uber and I have a fake leg.
Submitted by MyNameIsTim (user info) at 2006-02-15 15:34:06 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
nailed it.
Submitted by shadow (user info) at 2006-02-15 15:33:16 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
prosthetic limbs... sordid Las Vegas Hotdogings... What year is it? HOW LONG HAVE I BEEN ASLEEP?
Submitted by GodChicken (user info) at 2006-02-15 15:31:59 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by JonnyX (user info) at 2006-02-15 15:28:06 (#)
Ranking: 2
ah Monty, my good man, if you use the phrase 'hotdog down a hallway', you have to pay royalties to Lojope.
============
fine. *sings* MY RAPE SLAVES BRING ALL THE RAPE TO THE YARD
AND THEY'RE LIKE "RAPE RAPE RAPE, RAPE RAPE RAPE"
Submitted by shadow (user info) at 2006-02-15 15:31:25 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
<insert remarkably witty coment> wtf?!
Submitted by Method (user info) at 2006-02-15 15:30:05 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
deny it all you want, you homewrecker, but you've scarred me for life
Submitted by TigerLilly (user info) at 2006-02-15 15:28:23 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Method (user info) at 2006-02-15 15:26:51 (#)
Ranking: 2
i hate that bitch, she broke my heart
HAHAHAHA..you're such an ass. I did no such thing.
Submitted by JonnyX (user info) at 2006-02-15 15:28:06 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
ah Monty, my good man, if you use the phrase 'hotdog down a hallway', you have to pay royalties to Lojope.
Submitted by Method (user info) at 2006-02-15 15:26:51 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
i hate that bitch, she broke my heart
Submitted by Orgasmatron (user info) at 2006-02-15 15:26:50 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
I have no excuse. I'm always this way.
Submitted by The_taste_of_Monkeys (user info) at 2006-02-15 15:18:15 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
nah, its fine. you I dont feel nothing cos 1.Drugged up 2.Im Ironman
I did once have a bone marrow aspiration with no drugs...heres a hint, if they ask if you want drugs scream "YES YES OH GODS PLEASE GIVE ME THE DRUGS!" as it hurts...a LOT.
In short I was BEGGING them to stop.
Submitted by TigerLilly (user info) at 2006-02-15 15:14:40 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Ouch. That doesn't sound like fun. Sorry.
Submitted by The_taste_of_Monkeys (user info) at 2006-02-15 15:13:23 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Actually TL, Ive got an excuse. I was pumped full of anaesthetic yesterday so a doc could drill into my bone, that shit always fucks me up. I slept for 14 hours last night and I still feel weird.
Submitted by Kraven (user info) at 2006-02-15 15:13:22 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Dont credit Weed for this... this is way below Mary Jane, Mary Jane deserves a noble prize, this one... is just in it for the darwin awards.
Submitted by GodChicken (user info) at 2006-02-15 15:13:13 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by TigerLilly (user info) at 2006-02-15 15:08:10 (#)
Ranking: 2
Is everyone here high today? What gives?
==================
Look at you trying to deny it.
You USED me, like a cheap napkin. All these other men here are proving it.
Submitted by TigerLilly (user info) at 2006-02-15 15:08:10 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Is everyone here high today? What gives?
Submitted by The_taste_of_Monkeys (user info) at 2006-02-15 15:07:20 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Orgasmatron (user info) at 2006-02-15 15:03:24 (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by TigerLilly (user info) at 2006-02-15 15:02:59 (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Orgasmatron (user info) at 2006-02-15 15:01:52 (#)
Ranking: 2
The lady gets around, what can I say?
-----------------------------------------------------
Not true.
---
But....but you told me you loved me!
---------
And me
Submitted by Orgasmatron (user info) at 2006-02-15 15:03:24 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by TigerLilly (user info) at 2006-02-15 15:02:59 (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Orgasmatron (user info) at 2006-02-15 15:01:52 (#)
Ranking: 2
The lady gets around, what can I say?
-----------------------------------------------------
Not true.
---
But....but you told me you loved me!
Submitted by TigerLilly (user info) at 2006-02-15 15:02:59 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Orgasmatron (user info) at 2006-02-15 15:01:52 (#)
Ranking: 2
The lady gets around, what can I say?
-----------------------------------------------------
Not true.
Submitted by OneCheapGeek (user info) at 2006-02-15 15:02:34 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
This almost rivals the ToxicNarcotic/Val thing. Except that one was serious.
Nevermind.
Submitted by Orgasmatron (user info) at 2006-02-15 15:01:52 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
The lady gets around, what can I say?
Submitted by polyamorousaj (user info) at 2006-02-15 14:58:39 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Method (user info) at 2006-02-15 14:51:17 (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by zakalwe (user info) at 2006-02-15 14:50:21 (#)
Ranking: -2
I thought you were the mature older man monty. shouldn't you be hooking up with forensicgirl or someone else sufficiently pickled by the ravages of time?
hahahahahahahahahaahahahahah
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2006-02-15 14:58:30 EST (#)
Ranking: -1
I really wish this was a good post, but alas, it blows.
Submitted by GodChicken (user info) at 2006-02-15 14:57:46 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Orgasmatron (user info) at 2006-02-15 14:56:18 (#)
Ranking: 2
http://www.ubersite.com/m/84055#1840153
==============
HIM TOO???!
How many men did you cheat on me with around here?
Submitted by CaptainThorns (user info) at 2006-02-15 14:56:45 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
Submitted by GodChicken (user info) at 2006-02-15 14:49:19 (#)
Ranking: -2
What the fuck am I doing?
==============================
I wondered the same thing.
Submitted by Orgasmatron (user info) at 2006-02-15 14:56:18 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
http://www.ubersite.com/m/84055#1840153
Submitted by MistressFist (user info) at 2006-02-15 14:54:57 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
Everybody wants a piece of the pie these days.
Submitted by GodChicken (user info) at 2006-02-15 14:54:50 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by TigerLilly (user info) at 2006-02-15 14:53:05 (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by GodChicken (user info) at 2006-02-15 14:52:07 (#)
Ranking: 0
Tigerlilly: Damn it, why would you do this to me? Remember when we went to the zoo and I saved you from the beaver?
What on earth are you talking about? Have you lost your marbles?
==============
No, god damn it, I LOST YOU!
I'm so emo right now the lawn in front of the office is cutting itself.
Submitted by HighVoltage900 (user info) at 2006-02-15 14:53:40 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
Smiling*
Submitted by creep_firebombing (user info) at 2006-02-15 14:53:22 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Aahahahahaaa.....wha?
Submitted by TigerLilly (user info) at 2006-02-15 14:53:05 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by GodChicken (user info) at 2006-02-15 14:52:07 (#)
Ranking: 0
Tigerlilly: Damn it, why would you do this to me? Remember when we went to the zoo and I saved you from the beaver?
What on earth are you talking about? Have you lost your marbles?
Submitted by GodChicken (user info) at 2006-02-15 14:52:07 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by zakalwe (user info) at 2006-02-15 14:50:21 (#)
Ranking: -2
I thought you were the mature older man monty. shouldn't you be hooking up with forensicgirl or someone else sufficiently pickled by the ravages of time?
======================================
I'm 29 next month. She's perfect.
Tigerlilly: Damn it, why would you do this to me? Remember when we went to the zoo and I saved you from the beaver?
Submitted by mbstateside (user info) at 2006-02-15 14:51:19 EST (#)
Ranking: -1
Submitted by GodChicken (user info) at 2006-02-15 14:49:19 (#)
Ranking: -2
What the fuck am I doing?
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You said it Mr
Submitted by Method (user info) at 2006-02-15 14:51:17 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by zakalwe (user info) at 2006-02-15 14:50:21 (#)
Ranking: -2
I thought you were the mature older man monty. shouldn't you be hooking up with forensicgirl or someone else sufficiently pickled by the ravages of time?
hahahahahahahahahaahahahahah
Submitted by Yams (user info) at 2006-02-15 14:51:14 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
HA!
Submitted by TigerLilly (user info) at 2006-02-15 14:50:42 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by GodChicken (user info) at 2006-02-15 14:49:19 (#)
Ranking: -2
What the fuck am I doing?
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I have no idea. What the fuck is wrong with you people.
Submitted by zakalwe (user info) at 2006-02-15 14:50:21 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
I thought you were the mature older man monty. shouldn't you be hooking up with forensicgirl or someone else sufficiently pickled by the ravages of time?
Submitted by Method (user info) at 2006-02-15 14:49:41 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
who the fuck is tigerlilly?
Submitted by BLITZKREIG_BOB (user info) at 2006-02-15 14:49:34 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Where did you find my picture at?
Submitted by GodChicken (user info) at 2006-02-15 14:49:19 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
What the fuck am I doing?