I Think I Found The Meaning Of Life (669 hits)
Category: NoneRating: -0.23 on 15 reviews (Rate this item) (V)
Submitted by Bryanhoop (View user info) at 2006-02-17 04:22:18 EST
So I was having some nice sit down time with Rene, when I decided that it could be feasibly possible to find the meaning of life if I was somehow able to invent a broad enough phrase to incorporate everything that we strive for in that life. Power. Wealth. Sex. Morality. Kindness. Charity. Knowledge. Anything and Everything that we as a human race have found to collectively deem necessary for our fruitful existance. Eureka. I found it. And it's not as shocking or as mind-blowing as one might assume.
To put this phrase into words was a difficult task due to its nature and the weak, capitalistic vocabulary that I was bred with through school. In fact, the specific wording may not totally reflect the subject or ideas contained within the phrase, but until we adopt the perfect language, these words could never be perfect.
To foreshadow: Yes, I did just state that the only perfect model of human interaction and way of thinking is in some cases frighteningly underdeveloped and weak. So there.
Without further ado, here is the phrase:
Rotate related product purchase selections to spur growth.
Note: Of course, this is not the TRUE intimation of the meaning of life because of problems stated in paragraph two above. Without the perfect language, to put the meaning of life (inherently perfect because we cannot fully understand it and we otherwise view it as so) into words would be impossible. Nothing perfect can arise from something imperfect--thank you Rene. However, this is as close to an accurate description as I can muster.
Although the implications of this phrase are limitless, there are a few imperative conclusions that can immediately be drawn. One of the more clear and far-reaching consequences is the fact that the phrase affirms capitalism as the only true way to achieve a perfect society. I did not mean to offend, but to deny this truth would to be simply imperfect.
User Reviews
Submitted by JonnyX (user info) at 2006-02-17 17:15:43 EST (#)
Ranking: -1
There's a whole bunch of words typed up here on the screen, but I'll be damned if I can figure out what they mean...
Submitted by JoeAverage (user info) at 2006-02-17 13:35:58 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
You're a toolbox, so try reading this:
http://www.ubersite.com/m/18763
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2006-02-17 10:57:50 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
Are you trying to be funny here?
You failed miserably.
Submitted by Kraven (user info) at 2006-02-17 09:40:37 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
Please, go sit in the corner and turn yourself off.
Submitted by simple_catalyst (user info) at 2006-02-17 09:39:42 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
"YAY CAPITALLISM"
"What characterizes capitalism is not the bad taste of the crowds, but the fact that these crowds, made prosperous by capitalism, became consumers of literature of course, of trashy literature. The book market is flooded by a downpour of trivial fiction for the semibarbarians. But this does not prevent great authors from creating imperishable works." - Mises
Submitted by The_taste_of_Monkeys (user info) at 2006-02-17 07:40:41 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
Submitted by burt_mianus (user info) at 2006-02-17 04:26:49 (#)
Ranking: 1
i think you'll find the meaning of life is 42
There was no NEED to put this as a reply, we were all thinking it anyway. You sir, have annoyed me HAVE AT THEE!
Submitted by Mr_T (user info) at 2006-02-17 06:48:56 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Quit yo jibba jabba!
Submitted by ertet (user info) at 2006-02-17 05:03:20 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
I don't think it is humanly possible with our imperfect language to accurately describe how hard this sucks. Not even a phrase such as "diabolical shit shambles" has the ability to portray the horrendous attempt at being vaguely philosophical.
To summarise: You suck, it sucks, go home.
Submitted by Banga3386 (user info) at 2006-02-17 04:58:56 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
(because I don't know you) I half expected the sentence to be "Emu taking a vicious dump"
I'm glad it wasn't because this was interesting.
Banga
Submitted by Bryanhoop (user info) at 2006-02-17 04:51:21 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
It is actually pro-capitalism. I am not pro-socialism. My post is not sarcastic.
Submitted by redskieslookfake (user info) at 2006-02-17 04:39:15 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Is this supposed to be a marxist critique on the capitalist dominion of language? This is not a well formed post.
Submitted by maiorano84 (user info) at 2006-02-17 04:37:22 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
The meaning of life is to give life meaning.
Submitted by burt_mianus (user info) at 2006-02-17 04:30:19 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
reading builds knowledge, knowledge is power, power corrupts, corruption is a crime, crime doesnt pay, so carry on reading you'll go broke.
(I give full credit to Scott Adams for this, but its relevant)
Submitted by Brian_Blessed (user info) at 2006-02-17 04:28:22 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
THE MEANING OF LIFE IS KNOWLEDGE!!!!!
Submitted by burt_mianus (user info) at 2006-02-17 04:26:49 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
i think you'll find the meaning of life is 42