After the Pandemic: Gheyicide (1): Axolotl is raped by a zombie (rape) (870 hits)
Category: SportsRating: 0.85 on 40 reviews (Rate this item) (V)
Submitted by Teh Axolotl (View user info) at 2006-02-17 10:53:56 EST
After the Pandemic: The only good version - http://www.ubersite.com/m/61238
After the Pandemic: Ghey: - http://www.gay.com
Goatse: - http://www.goatse.org
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Gheyicide:(1): Axolotl is raped by a zombie
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Axolotl lazily lounged around in the basement wondering how to start of his new story. He sighed; he couldn't think of much. No one read his shit, anyway. Suddenly, he thought of a brilliant idea for an entry: he could write about zombies, no one ever grew tired of that. He was about to type when he heard someone enter the basement. He turned around to see if Shlongy had stopped by for a quickie, but it was not Shlongy. It was Orgasmatron.
"Hmm, what are you typing there Axolotl? Did you tie up Urbane and hijack her account again so that you could publicly whine about things no one cares about?"
"Shut up, Orgasmatron." Axolotl retorted. "Besides, you know that you were the one who tied up Lettuce. Leave me alone, don't you have anything better to do?"
Orgasmatron smirked. "Mmm, touchy today, aren't we? Are you PMSing, might I ask?"
"Really, Orgasmatron?" Axolotl said, unphased by Matron's comments. "I'd rather be PMSing that bothering people who are trying to write because they have nothing better to do."
"Hmmph." 'Matron said. The two sat in silence for a while until Orgasmatron spoke up again.
"So, whatcha typing, Ax?"
"Stuff about you." Axolotl replied.
"Oh? How superior I am compared to you?" Orgasmatron questioned.
Axolotl turned and glared at Orgasmatron. "Far from it. Besides, if you really want to know, you can read it later."
Another awkward silence followed, until Orgasmatron spoke again.
"Are you going to be done soon?"
"That depends on how often I'm interrupted..." Axolotl said, starting to get pissed.
Orgasmatron sighed sadly, then whispered, "But I can't wait..."
"What was that?" Axolotl asked. "I didn't hear you."
Orgasmatron walked closer to Axolotl and rubbed against him. "But I can't wait for you...I...I want you now..."
Axolotl looked up, afraid at first, but then he calmed down. "Come on, Orgasmatron. This isn't some sick post-Valentine's Day joke, is it?"
"No joke, Axolotl." Orgasmatron whispered in his bad-boy voice. "I want your blood, and I want your body; I want you now." He then fell on his back onto the floor, spreading his legs. "I love you, Axolotl. Forget Urbane, be with me..."
Orgasmatron had a pale face and staring eyes - no! He was a zombie! Axolotl drew back, but grew amazingly attracted to him.
Axolotl couldn't help but stare. Orgasmatron was beautiful. He was tall, dark, sexy, and badass. He pounced onto Orgasmatron and began to lick his neck and lips while he pawed the place between his legs. Orgasmatron sighed, then sat up and began to suck on Axolotl's male-reproductive organ. Axolotl moaned as Orgasmatron put him in the mood. But suddenly, he gasped.
"What is it, Ax?" Orgasmatron asked. "Doesn't it feel good?"
"Shlongy..." Axolotl responded. "What if he hears us and comes over?"
Orgasmatron smiled his sinful, sexy smile. "Don't worry your handsome self, dear Axolotl. Shlongy's preacticing for the reunion of Dipshitallica."
"That's good, 'Matron." Axolotl said.
"Anything for you," Orgasmatron replied, and he continued to suck on Axolotl's masculinity.
After Axolotl was in the mood, Orgasmatron went back into Submissive-Stance, and Axolotl followed him in Dominant-Stance. Then, Axolotl thrusted. Orgasmatron whimpered at first, but Axolotl stroked him and whispered, "I know you like that..." Orgasmatron nodded and licked Axolotl's ear. Axolotl continued to thrust until Orgasmatron was in orgasmatronic ecstasy. They moaned and rolled around in fluffy ghey sex until they lost all their energy.
Orgasmatron kissed Axolotl and whispered, "That was wonderful. When can we do that again?"
Axolotl kissed Orgasmatron back and said, "Hopefully as soon as possible, love."
~Fin.
User Reviews
Submitted by simple_catalyst (user info) at 2006-02-19 23:43:11 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
BWAHAHAHAHAHAHA!
Submitted by Amorphous (user info) at 2006-02-19 23:39:26 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
fudge
Submitted by Bubba2341 (user info) at 2006-02-17 19:51:13 EST (#)
Ranking: -1
I don't give a fuck who the alter may be, it sucked.
Submitted by retrospect (user info) at 2006-02-17 13:40:19 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
YOU LIKE ME?????
AUTO +2 LIKING ME.
Submitted by Orgasmatron (user info) at 2006-02-17 13:25:18 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
Submitted by HighVoltage900 (user info) at 2006-02-17 13:18:11 (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by JonnyX (user info) at 2006-02-17 13:02:03 (#)
Ranking: 2
This is pretty funny - mostly because of all the people running around shrieking "Who's alter IS this???".
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It's Habeeb.
--
It's me.
Submitted by HighVoltage900 (user info) at 2006-02-17 13:18:11 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by JonnyX (user info) at 2006-02-17 13:02:03 (#)
Ranking: 2
This is pretty funny - mostly because of all the people running around shrieking "Who's alter IS this???".
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It's Habeeb.
Submitted by JonnyX (user info) at 2006-02-17 13:02:03 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
This is pretty funny - mostly because of all the people running around shrieking "Who's alter IS this???".
Submitted by Amorphous (user info) at 2006-02-17 12:41:54 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by retrospect (user info) at 2006-02-17 12:35:57 (#)
Ranking: -2
Submitted by Amorphous (user info) at 2006-02-17 12:19:04 (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by retrospect (user info) at 2006-02-17 11:37:43 (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Amorphous (user info) at 2006-02-17 11:35:32 (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Orgasmatron (user info) at 2006-02-17 11:33:14 (#)
Ranking: 0
I'm sure Amorphous will just post something under a sillified version of my name on Monday anyway.
Good idea for an alter, I must say. The name's appropriate, if you're considering doing this as your 'thing.'
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har har. http://www.ubersite.com/u/transformer
Was transformer before your time?
I try to be a very successful alter. It's just not funny to see some idiot posing as a n00b asking stupid questions or pretending to be a retard. You have to be a good alter, like Cabaret Girl, Little Miss, or Flarn Dorfar. Don't worry, I have something for everyone...
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OH THANK GOD!! I WAS WORRIED.
we all give a shit....
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Go away, Retrospect. We all know you like men.
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thats not even an insult to me, thanks for letting me know i'm talking to a teenager. "you're below me, you like men" is the stupidest mentality EVER!!!
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I'm an alter, Restroomspect. I wouldn't say that on my normal account because I have respect. I like you (and Orgasmatron and Axolotl - not shlongy) on my regular account, but being that I'm an alter, I am free to say what I want.
PS: You like men.
Har har immaturity.
Submitted by retrospect (user info) at 2006-02-17 12:35:57 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
Submitted by Amorphous (user info) at 2006-02-17 12:19:04 (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by retrospect (user info) at 2006-02-17 11:37:43 (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Amorphous (user info) at 2006-02-17 11:35:32 (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Orgasmatron (user info) at 2006-02-17 11:33:14 (#)
Ranking: 0
I'm sure Amorphous will just post something under a sillified version of my name on Monday anyway.
Good idea for an alter, I must say. The name's appropriate, if you're considering doing this as your 'thing.'
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har har. http://www.ubersite.com/u/transformer
Was transformer before your time?
I try to be a very successful alter. It's just not funny to see some idiot posing as a n00b asking stupid questions or pretending to be a retard. You have to be a good alter, like Cabaret Girl, Little Miss, or Flarn Dorfar. Don't worry, I have something for everyone...
----
OH THANK GOD!! I WAS WORRIED.
we all give a shit....
-----------------
Go away, Retrospect. We all know you like men.
---
thats not even an insult to me, thanks for letting me know i'm talking to a teenager. "you're below me, you like men" is the stupidest mentality EVER!!!
Submitted by Amorphous (user info) at 2006-02-17 12:27:57 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Kraven (user info) at 2006-02-17 11:35:24 (#)
Ranking: -2
I did find it somewhat humors but more so disturbing....
-2 Because i wouldn't doubt you masturbated as you wrote this.
--
Yeah, we all know who really jerked off to this. Embarassed? Guilty? It's all right, Kraven, it's nothing to be worried about. It's perfectly normal.
Submitted by Amorphous (user info) at 2006-02-17 12:19:04 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by retrospect (user info) at 2006-02-17 11:37:43 (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Amorphous (user info) at 2006-02-17 11:35:32 (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Orgasmatron (user info) at 2006-02-17 11:33:14 (#)
Ranking: 0
I'm sure Amorphous will just post something under a sillified version of my name on Monday anyway.
Good idea for an alter, I must say. The name's appropriate, if you're considering doing this as your 'thing.'
-----------
har har. http://www.ubersite.com/u/transformer
Was transformer before your time?
I try to be a very successful alter. It's just not funny to see some idiot posing as a n00b asking stupid questions or pretending to be a retard. You have to be a good alter, like Cabaret Girl, Little Miss, or Flarn Dorfar. Don't worry, I have something for everyone...
----
OH THANK GOD!! I WAS WORRIED.
we all give a shit....
-----------------
Go away, Retrospect. We all know you like men.
Submitted by zakalwe (user info) at 2006-02-17 11:39:33 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by retrospect (user info) at 2006-02-17 11:37:43 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Amorphous (user info) at 2006-02-17 11:35:32 (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Orgasmatron (user info) at 2006-02-17 11:33:14 (#)
Ranking: 0
I'm sure Amorphous will just post something under a sillified version of my name on Monday anyway.
Good idea for an alter, I must say. The name's appropriate, if you're considering doing this as your 'thing.'
-----------
har har. http://www.ubersite.com/u/transformer
Was transformer before your time?
I try to be a very successful alter. It's just not funny to see some idiot posing as a n00b asking stupid questions or pretending to be a retard. You have to be a good alter, like Cabaret Girl, Little Miss, or Flarn Dorfar. Don't worry, I have something for everyone...
----
OH THANK GOD!! I WAS WORRIED.
we all give a shit....
Submitted by Amorphous (user info) at 2006-02-17 11:37:07 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Not just you, either, Orgasmatron. I have a nice list made up:
Axolotl
Orgasmatron
Habeeb
Shandy
Degreeless
Caulaincourt
Bart (bad idea, maybe, that's an insta-ban)
Fat Tony, Electro....oh, there's so many possibilities.
That's not a real list, by the way. I'll go with the flow.
Submitted by Amorphous (user info) at 2006-02-17 11:35:32 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Orgasmatron (user info) at 2006-02-17 11:33:14 (#)
Ranking: 0
I'm sure Amorphous will just post something under a sillified version of my name on Monday anyway.
Good idea for an alter, I must say. The name's appropriate, if you're considering doing this as your 'thing.'
-----------
har har. http://www.ubersite.com/u/transformer
Was transformer before your time?
I try to be a very successful alter. It's just not funny to see some idiot posing as a n00b asking stupid questions or pretending to be a retard. You have to be a good alter, like Cabaret Girl, Little Miss, or Flarn Dorfar. Don't worry, I have something for everyone...
Submitted by Kraven (user info) at 2006-02-17 11:35:24 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
I did find it somewhat humors but more so disturbing....
-2 Because i wouldn't doubt you masturbated as you wrote this.
Submitted by Orgasmatron (user info) at 2006-02-17 11:33:14 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
I'm sure Amorphous will just post something under a sillified version of my name on Monday anyway.
Good idea for an alter, I must say. The name's appropriate, if you're considering doing this as your 'thing.'
Submitted by Nellypaal (user info) at 2006-02-17 11:31:25 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
I'm sure Orgasmatron could write a beautiful ode to this encounter.
Submitted by inion_de_trua (user info) at 2006-02-17 11:30:02 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
i liked the picture.
Submitted by Amorphous (user info) at 2006-02-17 11:25:30 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by retrospect (user info) at 2006-02-17 11:23:42 (#)
Ranking: -2
Submitted by BLITZKREIG_BOB (user info) at 2006-02-17 11:22:02 (#)
Ranking: 1
This is almost as fun as having sex with your cousin.
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yea!!! we all have!!!
why do we all like to get with ugly inbred people though? weird...
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Another bipolar!
Submitted by Amorphous (user info) at 2006-02-17 11:24:58 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Axolotl (user info) at 2006-02-17 11:24:23 (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Amorphous (user info) at 2006-02-17 11:10:22 (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Axolotl (user info) at 2006-02-17 11:00:29 (#)
Ranking: 2
Fine. You've provoked a reaction. Is this beeb? What's with the Go Bears Woo?
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Submitted by Axolotl (user info) at 2006-02-17 10:59:51 (#)
Ranking: -2
What the fuck?
---------
Dick, you ruined my rating. Get some lithium for your bipolar, as well.
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I see the humor in this.
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nurrrr
Submitted by Axolotl (user info) at 2006-02-17 11:24:23 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Amorphous (user info) at 2006-02-17 11:10:22 (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Axolotl (user info) at 2006-02-17 11:00:29 (#)
Ranking: 2
Fine. You've provoked a reaction. Is this beeb? What's with the Go Bears Woo?
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Submitted by Axolotl (user info) at 2006-02-17 10:59:51 (#)
Ranking: -2
What the fuck?
---------
Dick, you ruined my rating. Get some lithium for your bipolar, as well.
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I see the humor in this.
Submitted by retrospect (user info) at 2006-02-17 11:23:42 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
Submitted by BLITZKREIG_BOB (user info) at 2006-02-17 11:22:02 (#)
Ranking: 1
This is almost as fun as having sex with your cousin.
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yea!!! we all have!!!
why do we all like to get with ugly inbred people though? weird...
Submitted by BLITZKREIG_BOB (user info) at 2006-02-17 11:22:02 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
This is almost as fun as having sex with your cousin.
Submitted by Amorphous (user info) at 2006-02-17 11:21:13 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by retrospect (user info) at 2006-02-17 11:14:45 (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Amorphous (user info) at 2006-02-17 11:11:18 (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by retrospect (user info) at 2006-02-17 11:10:07 (#)
Ranking: 2
approved
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i did bang an Amorphous family member didn't i?
------
You banged nothing. That was a pillow.
Submitted by Amorphous (user info) at 2006-02-17 11:20:45 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Orgasmatron (user info) at 2006-02-17 11:15:00 (#)
Ranking: 1
Would have been a +2 if I was the pitcher.
Sorry, Ax, but I'd totally be the man if we were together.
Oh, and since we're apparently suckin' everyone's dicks today:
http://www.ubersite.com/u/Orgasmatron
http://www.ubersite.com/u/Axolotl
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WE? I'm afraid that you're the only one fellating a man-root today.
Submitted by Orgasmatron (user info) at 2006-02-17 11:15:26 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Who am I kidding? I loves me some namedroppage.
Submitted by Orgasmatron (user info) at 2006-02-17 11:15:00 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
Would have been a +2 if I was the pitcher.
Sorry, Ax, but I'd totally be the man if we were together.
Oh, and since we're apparently suckin' everyone's dicks today:
http://www.ubersite.com/u/Orgasmatron
http://www.ubersite.com/u/Axolotl
Submitted by retrospect (user info) at 2006-02-17 11:14:45 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Amorphous (user info) at 2006-02-17 11:11:18 (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by retrospect (user info) at 2006-02-17 11:10:07 (#)
Ranking: 2
approved
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i did bang an Amorphous family member didn't i?
Submitted by The_taste_of_Monkeys (user info) at 2006-02-17 11:12:10 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
I chuckled
Submitted by Amorphous (user info) at 2006-02-17 11:11:18 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by retrospect (user info) at 2006-02-17 11:10:07 (#)
Ranking: 2
approved
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Approved, but still gay.
Submitted by Amorphous (user info) at 2006-02-17 11:10:22 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Axolotl (user info) at 2006-02-17 11:00:29 (#)
Ranking: 2
Fine. You've provoked a reaction. Is this beeb? What's with the Go Bears Woo?
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Submitted by Axolotl (user info) at 2006-02-17 10:59:51 (#)
Ranking: -2
What the fuck?
---------
Dick, you ruined my rating. Get some lithium for your bipolar, as well.
Submitted by retrospect (user info) at 2006-02-17 11:10:07 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
approved
Submitted by Sacrilicious (user info) at 2006-02-17 11:04:15 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
hahahahahahahahahha*diddle*HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA*diddle*hahahahahahahahahhahaha HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA*diddle*HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
THIS IS FUCKING HOT.
Submitted by a_little_more_time (user info) at 2006-02-17 11:03:44 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
LARF.
Submitted by scourge (user info) at 2006-02-17 11:02:47 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
meh.
Submitted by Axolotl (user info) at 2006-02-17 11:00:29 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Fine. You've provoked a reaction. Is this beeb? What's with the Go Bears Woo?
Submitted by Axolotl (user info) at 2006-02-17 10:59:51 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
What the fuck?
Submitted by HighVoltage900 (user info) at 2006-02-17 10:56:39 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
HAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!
They do seem to love each other.
Submitted by Amorphous (user info) at 2006-02-17 10:54:34 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
I get first -2!