If this self induced coma doesn't kill me, the aspartame will. (Sugar-Free Soft Post) (538 hits)
Category: GeneralRating: -0.13 on 17 reviews (Rate this item) (V)
Submitted by WindChill (View user info) at 2006-02-21 20:47:54 EST
You're probably going to think to yourself "This is just an other n00b/nub/newb/newbie on ubersite making an other bland attempt at internet social friendship." And in a very sad, broken emo whine way, that's true. But give me the time of day here. Here's a little insight on me and my past uberness.
I'm a 19 year old male, I play videogames and I masterbate. Nothing new there, and you're right for thinking that. I work at a Computer access center where I do research. I spend most of my shifts reading stuff off of Ubersite and let me thank God, Allah or whatever that it (Ubersite) exists. It's saved me many, many hours of worthless spacing out at the computer screen. I usualy work afternoon/night shifts. 4-9. Short enough shifts.
So last friday I'm sitting at work, looking forward to getting home to watch a degrading ignorant filled movie that I've been overpriced with at the local convenance store. My supervisor is blabing away behind me stating opinions which I know are trully fucking horseshit and deep down just piss me off. Therefore I ignore the Jean-Luc Picard out of her. Nine o'clock finally rears it's ugly head and I fill my head with some soothing Lamb of God as I have to walk from work to the old folk's home to get my drive back to my place.
Let me set the mood up for you here. It's windy, really windy. 90 km/h winds, -20º C and add the winds are northern (I live in Canada PS). It's fucking cold. It's got this dark alley feel to the night as I walk the streets. So after a few minutes of walk in this shit, I finally make it to the old folks home, where there's one car in the parking lot, my budy's (obviously). I stand there, only thing on my mind being Ubersite and how I long to be part of it. I think up of this shitty post and respect that no matter how many Zombies, naked chicks, defying laws of physics, booster shots, bunnies, good grammar, underarm, Nazis, British Teeth, pop music and lifting weights I add to this, or any posts, I will never live up to my Uber Idols and I should stop right here, right now, if I even wish to save my already defeated, deviant, deleted, digned ego.
Long story short, Fun-Dips are amazingly good.
You fucking FUN-DIPSHIT!
User Reviews
Submitted by JonnyX (user info) at 2006-02-22 19:27:12 EST (#)
Ranking: -1
I'm a 19 year old male, I play videogames and I masterbate. Nothing new there, and you're right for thinking that.
----
(weakly) yayy!
Submitted by leilani (user info) at 2006-02-22 11:53:22 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by HighVoltage900 (user info) at 2006-02-21 22:01:15 (#)
Ranking: 0
I might like you in the future.
If you turn out to suck, I will hate you and call you names.
Submitted by Teephphah (user info) at 2006-02-22 09:01:37 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Not so good.
But there may be potential.
Try not to suck so much next time.
Submitted by phuzzygish (user info) at 2006-02-22 08:55:25 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
And thanks. It's nice to be respected as somebodies idol. Imo go puff my chest out in pride now.
Submitted by phuzzygish (user info) at 2006-02-22 08:54:09 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
*makes obvious geek joke about covenance stores and Halo*
Submitted by skrapmetal (user info) at 2006-02-22 07:11:12 EST (#)
Ranking: -1
Submitted by HighVoltage900 (user info) at 2006-02-21 22:01:15 (#)
Ranking: 0
I might like you in the future.
If you turn out to suck, I will hate you and call you names.
-----------------------
It's true, he will.
...and any word processor has 'spell check'. Run your posts through that mill once and then proofread aloud before you submit the post. It'll save you the spelling/grammar -2s and get people to read it for content rather than for errors.
Welcome to Uber.
Submitted by rad1101 (user info) at 2006-02-22 02:21:15 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
what the fuck was this?
Submitted by Monarch (user info) at 2006-02-22 01:16:15 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Jean Luc Picard of the U.S.S. Enterprise.
Submitted by supadupapupa (user info) at 2006-02-21 22:07:15 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Wasn't really that good, but good luck here. It's a cynical crowd
Submitted by HighVoltage900 (user info) at 2006-02-21 22:01:15 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
I might like you in the future.
If you turn out to suck, I will hate you and call you names.
Submitted by Bubba2341 (user info) at 2006-02-21 21:59:33 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
More reasons for -2:
masterbate (masturbate)
ignorant (ignorance)
blabing (blabbling)
trully (truly)
budy's (buddy's)
digned (????)
Submitted by Bubba2341 (user info) at 2006-02-21 21:53:01 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
"An other." That alone gets a -2...
Submitted by MandaPanda (user info) at 2006-02-21 21:28:43 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
+2 Canadianism.
Submitted by forthewin (user info) at 2006-02-21 21:09:54 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
haha
I feel sorry for you. Have a +2 in hopes you'll post something decent, and your average rating will deserve it.
Submitted by r0fl (user info) at 2006-02-21 21:07:43 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
B@W
Submitted by Chroniclysm (user info) at 2006-02-21 20:52:54 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
This was easy.
Submitted by Unabonger (user info) at 2006-02-21 20:51:56 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
Welcome to Uber!
-2DIE