Illustrated News: Man Hides In Bathrooms and Collects and Drinks Lil Boys Pee- Film at 11 (1309 hits)
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Rating: 1 on 34 reviews (Rate this item) (V)
Submitted by Habeeb "Slice Yer Gullet" Thomas (View user info) at 2006-02-28 18:20:02 EST
EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEWWWWWWWWWWW....
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Alan Patton, 54, is in jail after allegedly telling Gahanna police that he enjoys drinking urine.
Detective Ron Fithen interviewed Patton after he was arrested while leaving a movie theater last weekend.
"Listening to his describe it, it's like listening to a crack or cocaine addict. He's addicted to children's urine," Fithen said.
According to police, Patton said he's been drinking urine for years.
"He told us he's been doing it over 40 years, since he was 7 years old," Fithen said.
Police said Patton goes to family restaurants and movie theaters and waits for boys in a bathroom stall. Investigators said he shuts off the water to the child-level urinal and puts a cup in the bottom.
Patton allegedly told police that he leaves the stall after the child leaves.
"He goes back and retrieves the cup and drinks the urine," Fithen said.
Police said Patton told them it makes him sick, but that it's almost spiritual to him. He allegedly added, "I like it because it makes me closer to them -- like I'm drinking their youth."
A New Albany father played a role in Patton's arrest. He told someone at a movie theater that Patton was staring at his son in the bathroom. The theater employee then called police.
Officials said Patton is a registered sexual predator, who was convicted of ®®®® 13 years ago.
Police believe Patton has been collecting and drinking urine in cities around Central Ohio, including Hilliard, Westerville, Dublin, Worthington and Gahanna.
http://www.teoti.com/t5/showthread.php?threadid=19386
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BLAARRFFFFFFFFFFFF
DATS ALLS I GOTS TO SAY BOUT DAT
GO CHICAGO RUSH ARENA FOOTBALL TEAM AND NOT THE CRAPPY BAND RUSH WOO!!!
User Reviews
Submitted by inkursion (user info) at 2006-03-01 13:55:47 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
I love your shit. Not even my little brother is this immature.
Submitted by MistressFist (user info) at 2006-03-01 12:31:59 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Wow. I love the fireworks of youthful glory eminating from his mouth.
Submitted by sicosemen (user info) at 2006-03-01 07:57:05 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
He found the fountain of youth.
Submitted by beatjunky (user info) at 2006-03-01 03:44:18 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
YOU TRACED IT DIDNT YOU?? GET SOME TALENT INSTEAD OF RIPPING OFF OTHER PEOPLES PICTURES, EVERYONE KNOWS THIS IS IN THE LOUVRE...
Submitted by sparkle_pink (user info) at 2006-03-01 01:17:36 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Wait a minute, Marge. I saw "Mrs. Doubtfire." This is a man in drag!
-- Homer Simpson
Simpsoncalifragilisticexpiala(annoyed grunt)ocious
Submitted by Dead_0hi0_Sky (user info) at 2006-03-01 01:05:52 EST (#)
Ranking: -1
hey! its not even thursday yet!
Submitted by Spooner (user info) at 2006-03-01 00:33:29 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
IT'S THE BAND RUSH AND YOU KNOW IT
Submitted by thorpe (user info) at 2006-02-28 22:48:33 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Hahahaha "OH GOD IT'S SO WORTH IT"
Submitted by knucklesnelson (user info) at 2006-02-28 22:24:24 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
No Comment
Submitted by munkeypants (user info) at 2006-02-28 22:21:56 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
That pic cracked me up
Submitted by gonefiguring (user info) at 2006-02-28 21:48:58 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
PS: I am (really)^2 drunk.
Submitted by gonefiguring (user info) at 2006-02-28 21:48:40 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
rongrongrongrongrongjustrong
Submitted by Stagger_Lee (user info) at 2006-02-28 21:43:09 EST (#)
Ranking: -1
No, I do not know what the Schadenfreude is. Please tell me, because
I'm dying to know.
-- Homer Simpson
When Flanders Failed
Submitted by YELLOW-MAN (user info) at 2006-02-28 21:42:38 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Blarf indeed.
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2006-02-28 21:32:11 EST (#)
Ranking: -1
I get it. Habeeb's real name is Alex Patton and unbelievably, he's older than Shlongy.
Submitted by MrSparkle847 (user info) at 2006-02-28 21:27:28 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Dude, where do you find this news?
Submitted by Method (user info) at 2006-02-28 21:11:44 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Gee, if some snot-nosed little kid sent me to prison, the first thing
out, I'd find out where he lives, and tear him a new belly button.
-- Homer Simpson
Cape Feare
Submitted by icarus1987 (user info) at 2006-02-28 21:09:36 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
So he inhales their youth through urine??
I've heard of bathing in virgin's blood, but that's new to me.
Submitted by Bubba2341 (user info) at 2006-02-28 20:15:06 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Oh, the guys are work are going to have a field day with this.
-- Homer Simpson
The Call of the Simpsons
Submitted by JonnyX (user info) at 2006-02-28 20:01:21 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Gee, if some snot-nosed little kid sent me to prison, the first thing
out, I'd find out where he lives, and tear him a new belly button.
-- Homer Simpson
Cape Feare
Submitted by TheSpook (user info) at 2006-02-28 19:40:17 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
See you in hell, candy boys!!
-- Homer Simpson
Homer Badman
Submitted by BadAssJulie (user info) at 2006-02-28 19:06:50 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
Flanders:
Y'know, Simpson, I feel kinda silly, but, uh, you know, what
the hey, you know ... kinda reminds me of my good ole
fraternity days.
Homer: D'oh! Oh my God! He's enjoying it!
Dead Putting Society
Submitted by Axolotl (user info) at 2006-02-28 18:52:43 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Six simple words: I'm not gay, but I'll learn.
-- Homer Simpson
I Love Lisa
/\
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Har har appropriate. Somewhat.
Submitted by Genko (user info) at 2006-02-28 18:42:56 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
I guess Bart's not to blame. He's lucky, too, because it's spanking
season, and I got a hankering for some spankering!
-- Homer Simpson
Two Dozen and One Greyhounds
Submitted by HighVoltage900 (user info) at 2006-02-28 18:32:01 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Yeah that was a nasty news segment.
Submitted by FATMANTPK (user info) at 2006-02-28 18:30:17 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
Homer: Marge, it's 3 a.m. and I worked all day!
Marge: It's 9:30 p.m. and you spent your whole Saturday drinking beer
in Maggie's kiddie pool.
Another Simpsons Clip Show
Submitted by MANICMOTHER (user info) at 2006-02-28 18:26:19 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
And, Lord, we're especially thankful for nuclear power, the cleanest,
safest energy source there is, except for solar, which is just a pipe
dream.
-- Homer Simpson
Bart vs. Thanksgiving
FUSION BITCHES.
Submitted by The_taste_of_Monkeys (user info) at 2006-02-28 18:26:11 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
As far as anyone knows we're a nice, normal family.
-- Homer Simpson
There's No Disgrace Like Home
Submitted by Kindred (user info) at 2006-02-28 18:25:38 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
Well, I acquired it legally, you can be sure of that.
-- Homer Simpson
Treehouse of Horror VI
Submitted by ChristPuncher (user info) at 2006-02-28 18:25:13 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
STOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOP
WEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEP
DATS IT IM LEAVIN
Submitted by matnotharry (user info) at 2006-02-28 18:24:31 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
Pfft. Now you tell me.
-- Homer Simpson, finding out that working at a nuclear
plant can make one sterile
I Married Marge
Submitted by rad1101 (user info) at 2006-02-28 18:23:20 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
All right. His story checks out.
-- Homer Simpson, checking in the encyclopedia
under "Bush, George"
Two Bad Neighbors
Submitted by ChristPuncher (user info) at 2006-02-28 18:22:57 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
WEEEEEEEEP
U HERT MA FEELINS
Submitted by Teephphah (user info) at 2006-02-28 18:22:22 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Well if it isn't the leader of the weiner patrol, boning up on his nerd
lessons!
-- Homer Simpson
Boy-Scoutz n the Hood
The random Simpsons quote seemed oddly appropriate?