The Battle of Uber: The Day the Emus Cried (nsfw) (5419 hits)
Category: HumorLabels: Uber-related/Bandwagon
Rating: 1.62 on 151 reviews (Rate this item) (V)
Submitted by Axolotl (View user info) at 2006-03-03 14:52:22 EST
User Reviews
Submitted by awesome_face (user info) at 2006-12-01 14:40:45 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
hshshahahahahahh
Submitted by sicosemen (user info) at 2006-12-01 14:24:13 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Yar.
Submitted by Axolotl (user info) at 2006-09-20 17:58:55 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2006-03-03 14:56:58 (#)
Ranking: 2
The best part about this - besides Shlongy being in it - is that the heads are cut out at random with no attempt at making them look good atop their respective bodies.
Submitted by Axolotl (user info) at 2006-07-15 00:08:20 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Whatever happened to Sphagnum?
Submitted by Axolotl (user info) at 2006-06-12 18:45:24 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Caulaincourt (user info) at 2006-06-12 17:51:58 (#)
Ranking: 2
I just realized I'm in this post...wtf.
--
le wtf
Submitted by Caulaincourt (user info) at 2006-06-12 17:51:58 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I just realized I'm in this post...wtf.
Submitted by Axolotl (user info) at 2006-06-12 17:34:45 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
-2die
Submitted by LSD420 (user info) at 2006-04-27 20:33:36 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Harder than lemonade.
I think I fucked that up.
Submitted by tarnation (user info) at 2006-04-27 20:12:06 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
this r0xus
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2006-04-27 20:00:39 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
..."Still funny after all these years..."
Submitted by inion_de_trua (user info) at 2006-04-27 15:36:39 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
man i forgot how awesome this was.
Submitted by EchoBoxing (user info) at 2006-04-27 15:23:21 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
what makes a man?
is it the woman in his arms,
just cause she's got bit titties?
or is it the way
he fights everyday
NO it's probably the titties.
Submitted by mush (user info) at 2006-03-11 10:12:31 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
hahahaha
Submitted by JonnyX (user info) at 2006-03-08 03:10:58 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
STILL FUNNNY
Submitted by InkyFingers (user info) at 2006-03-07 13:59:02 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by ThatOneGirl (user info) at 2006-03-06 21:08:37 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
bizzare
Submitted by simple_catalyst (user info) at 2006-03-06 10:01:15 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
i hate how brilliant you are.
Submitted by inion_de_trua (user info) at 2006-03-06 10:01:01 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by weasul (user info) at 2006-03-03 17:59:50 (#)
Ranking: 2
And I just learned of an Alpaca farm down the road as well. Jesus, my day can't get any better. Well, actually it could.
----------
hmmmm i'm stealing farm animals this weekend. or maybe i'll just take one of the llamas on the way home, then again maybe those are the alpacas you're talking about. if you pluck an emu's butt will it kill you?
Submitted by Axolotl (user info) at 2006-03-06 00:21:39 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Deconstruction (user info) at 2006-03-05 22:26:14 (#)
Ranking: -2
If I knew the synonyms for "Kissass" I'd label them all on this wonderful literary work.
So far, all I got is "brown-noser", and that's not even a cool word.
Predicament.
------
I think you should make a post. You're like Mystiamoon, except without the estrogen-fueled insantiy.
Submitted by Deconstruction (user info) at 2006-03-05 22:26:14 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
If I knew the synonyms for "Kissass" I'd label them all on this wonderful literary work.
So far, all I got is "brown-noser", and that's not even a cool word.
Predicament.
Submitted by Axolotl (user info) at 2006-03-05 20:12:18 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Sphagnum (user info) at 2006-03-05 11:51:31 (#)
Ranking: -2
Submitted by iddqd (user info) at 2006-03-05 05:35:40 (#)
Ranking: -2
this goes beyond lame into a whole new world of things that suck so hard there is no word for it.
possibly the least funny 'funny' post i have ever seen.
im sure youre an interesting and amusing guy and can post decent shit, this is just crap, thats all.
------
That's exactly what I was trying to say. It's not amusing or interesting, it's just another installment in the collective ass-kiss that you seem to participate in more and more as each day goes by.
Seriously, this was really gay.
-----
On one hand, while Iqqdq can post an intelligent review, all you can do is repeat it and call it "gay." More ass-kissing each day? Would that be adapting ETS's Iran idea into a series? My Pearl Jam posts? I'll admit that this was directed at reaching a low denominator of Ubersite, but name something else in which I ass-kissed...
...other than my Uberversary post...weeps...
I'm aware you're going to -2 me no matter what I post, so it doesn't really matter anyway.
Submitted by Axolotl (user info) at 2006-03-05 20:08:48 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by iddqd (user info) at 2006-03-05 05:35:40 (#)
Ranking: -2
this goes beyond lame into a whole new world of things that suck so hard there is no word for it.
possibly the least funny 'funny' post i have ever seen.
im sure youre an interesting and amusing guy and can post decent shit, this is just crap, thats all.
------
Perhaps.
I can post decent shit, but with this, I was just looking for something to do during 5th period Chemistry. Actually, I was surprised with the positive reaction it got. I can see your point.
Submitted by Axolotl (user info) at 2006-03-05 20:07:36 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by TonyMontana (user info) at 2006-03-04 23:32:22 (#)
Ranking: -2
the only thing i smiled about was the part making fun of that one chick's prosthetic leg. but this whole thing was pure garbage. it just goes to show you that ubersite is made up of a bunch of retarded children who +2 anything that has pictures and simple minded humor.
----
When I start getting -2ed by an alter is when I start to lose faith in Uber.
I direct you to Cindy's reply - Uber IS people with childish senses of humor.
Submitted by Sphagnum (user info) at 2006-03-05 11:51:31 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
Submitted by iddqd (user info) at 2006-03-05 05:35:40 (#)
Ranking: -2
this goes beyond lame into a whole new world of things that suck so hard there is no word for it.
possibly the least funny 'funny' post i have ever seen.
im sure youre an interesting and amusing guy and can post decent shit, this is just crap, thats all.
------
That's exactly what I was trying to say. It's not amusing or interesting, it's just another installment in the collective ass-kiss that you seem to participate in more and more as each day goes by.
Seriously, this was really gay.
Submitted by ih8u2man (user info) at 2006-03-05 11:45:36 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by LadyPlural (user info) at 2006-03-05 11:37:32 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Possibly, but even so, he said that he has no interest in, uhm, checking to see if that's the problem. Ever. Not checking with me, mind you. But somebody. He said that him receiving head was just "gross," and that he didn't see the point.
And I think that is exceedingly strange.
Submitted by iddqd (user info) at 2006-03-05 05:35:40 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
this goes beyond lame into a whole new world of things that suck so hard there is no word for it.
possibly the least funny 'funny' post i have ever seen.
im sure youre an interesting and amusing guy and can post decent shit, this is just crap, thats all.
Submitted by AsshOly (user info) at 2006-03-05 04:54:54 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
i dont know whats so funny about the peg leg, but this was otherwise great.
Submitted by c1ndy (user info) at 2006-03-05 01:51:08 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
ubersite IS made up of a bunch of retarded children who +2 anything that has pictures and simple minded humor.
Submitted by TonyMontana (user info) at 2006-03-04 23:32:22 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
the only thing i smiled about was the part making fun of that one chick's prosthetic leg. but this whole thing was pure garbage. it just goes to show you that ubersite is made up of a bunch of retarded children who +2 anything that has pictures and simple minded humor.
Submitted by Axolotl (user info) at 2006-03-04 21:37:49 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2006-03-04 20:09:50 (#)
Ranking: 2
It's a pretty comprehensive list and I'm relatively ceratin that almost any red blooded, non-dorky American male could probably be happy with liking even just 75% of that list.
--
ESPECIALLY Mrs. Shlongy.
Submitted by williamson (user info) at 2006-03-04 21:16:09 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Fucking. Cool.
Submitted by Axolotl (user info) at 2006-03-04 21:01:02 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by LadyPlural (user info) at 2006-03-04 20:45:17 (#)
Ranking: 2
Awesome post. Shlongy, if you read this, I'd like your opinion on something that I learned the other day that was Very Strange.
See, at a party, I was talking to one of my guy friends, and we somehow ended up in a conversation that lead to the revelation that he just plain does not like receiving blowjobs. And my question is, is the poor boy just defective, or just confused, or what?
------
Perhaps the gentleman in question has been only given bad head?
Submitted by LadyPlural (user info) at 2006-03-04 20:45:17 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Awesome post. Shlongy, if you read this, I'd like your opinion on something that I learned the other day that was Very Strange.
See, at a party, I was talking to one of my guy friends, and we somehow ended up in a conversation that lead to the revelation that he just plain does not like receiving blowjobs. And my question is, is the poor boy just defective, or just confused, or what?
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2006-03-04 20:09:50 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
It's a pretty comprehensive list and I'm relatively ceratin that almost any red blooded, non-dorky American male could probably be happy with liking even just 75% of that list.
Submitted by Axolotl (user info) at 2006-03-04 20:00:49 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2006-03-04 19:52:59 (#)
Ranking: 2
What do I like?
Gambling on sports
Playing poker
fucking broads
Getting blown
eating pussy
Playing golf
Music
Single Malt scotch
Cheeseburgers
Pizza
Bison Brand Onion Dip
My doggies and cat
The ocean
masturbating
Cheez-Its
Lobster
potato pancakes
Mrs. Shlongy
Baseball
Hockey
Lacrosse
Reading
and some other stuff, probably
------
I can agree with that.
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2006-03-04 19:52:59 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
What do I like?
Gambling on sports
Playing poker
fucking broads
Getting blown
eating pussy
Playing golf
Music
Single Malt scotch
Cheeseburgers
Pizza
Bison Brand Onion Dip
My doggies and cat
The ocean
masturbating
Cheez-Its
Lobster
potato pancakes
Mrs. Shlongy
Baseball
Hockey
Lacrosse
Reading
and some other stuff, probably
Submitted by Axolotl (user info) at 2006-03-04 19:26:08 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2006-03-04 19:18:42 (#)
Ranking: 2
I don't. I fucking hate 'em.
----
What DO you like, Shlongy?
Dare I say shlongs?
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2006-03-04 19:18:42 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
I don't. I fucking hate 'em.
Submitted by Axolotl (user info) at 2006-03-04 19:13:21 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Razor (user info) at 2006-03-04 13:41:11 (#)
Ranking: -2
Unfortunately, the -2 for rabbits and the -2 for emus cannot add up to a vote of -4.
----------------
I thought everyone on Uber liked emus and rabbits!
Submitted by Axolotl (user info) at 2006-03-04 19:05:08 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by G-prime (user info) at 2006-03-04 08:54:14 (#)
Ranking: 2
I've figured it out! Your alter was... d_prime!!! MWAAAHAHAHAHAHA I FIGURED YOU OUT, DERRICK!
----
Nope, not Mr. Prime. Soon, soon...
Submitted by Razor (user info) at 2006-03-04 13:41:11 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
Unfortunately, the -2 for rabbits and the -2 for emus cannot add up to a vote of -4.
Submitted by G-prime (user info) at 2006-03-04 08:54:14 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
I've figured it out! Your alter was... d_prime!!! MWAAAHAHAHAHAHA I FIGURED YOU OUT, DERRICK!
Submitted by G-prime (user info) at 2006-03-04 08:29:54 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
RAAAA
Submitted by G-prime (user info) at 2006-03-04 06:51:12 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
PERSONALLY BEYATCH!
RAAAA
Submitted by G-prime (user info) at 2006-03-04 06:27:51 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Seriously. You had better put me in part two or I will PERSONALLY -2 it.
Submitted by sinna (user info) at 2006-03-04 05:35:43 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by Method (user info) at 2006-03-04 01:44:52 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by rad1101 (user info) at 2006-03-04 01:39:07 (#)
Ranking: 2
this is the greatest post ever.
Submitted by rad1101 (user info) at 2006-03-04 01:39:07 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
this is the greatest post ever.
Submitted by G-prime (user info) at 2006-03-04 01:26:47 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Who is your alter?
Submitted by G-prime (user info) at 2006-03-04 01:24:34 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
The dougler wants to come too! The dougler? Dougler...
hahahahaha watchu talkin bout willis
I want to be in part deux!
Submitted by Method (user info) at 2006-03-04 01:23:38 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
have another for "Durr...I likes chockomut ice creams!"
Dear lord, he really talks like that
Submitted by Magic_Monkey (user info) at 2006-03-04 01:14:29 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Le Gasp !!!
Submitted by Orgasmatron (user info) at 2006-03-04 00:50:37 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Axolotl (user info) at 2006-03-03 17:53:10 (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Unabonger (user info) at 2006-03-03 17:39:34 (#)
Ranking: 2
"Show Me Dat C-Section Scar"
featuring axolotl's mom
hilarious.
-----
Blame that one on Orgasmatron.
---
Blame that one on your mom, really. She was the one teasing me with the hint of scarification at the time. Who was I to resist? You'd have written a song too if you'd seen the way she slathered butter and honey all over it while teasing the tip of my hangdown with her puffy scarline. Mmmm.
Submitted by Stagger_Lee (user info) at 2006-03-04 00:50:16 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
I don't like +2ing these name-dropping posts.
But I found myself laughing helplessly.
Damn you.
Submitted by Axolotl (user info) at 2006-03-03 23:48:42 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Doodles (user info) at 2006-03-03 23:36:27 (#)
Ranking: 0
Just out of curiostiy.. why are one of the rabbits demonic, With the evil red eyesthat I jsut now noticed.
----
It is either:
A) A super-rabbit zombie
B) It has had its eyes pecked out by a bloodthirsty emu
Whichever choice suits you.
Submitted by Doodles (user info) at 2006-03-03 23:36:27 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Just out of curiostiy.. why are one of the rabbits demonic, With the evil red eyesthat I jsut now noticed.
Submitted by Axolotl (user info) at 2006-03-03 23:18:23 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Sphagnum (user info) at 2006-03-03 21:00:59 (#)
Ranking: -1
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2006-03-03 15:28:03 (#)
Ranking: 2
Since you OBVIOUSLY have more spare time than pretty much any human I know...see if you can NOW take this and turn it into a short video, complete with audio and a soundtrack.
You can do it...get started on it tonight, since it's rather obvious that you have nothing better to do on a Friday night.
-------
^
:
:
:
The only thing that is funny about this post.
The rest was just dicksuckery and name-dropping.
You need to get out of the house, son.
---------
Oh Sphagnum, I thought we were friends now. You have wounded me with such cruel slanders...need to get out of the house? Why as a matter of fact, I just got home from playing music at a St. Patrick's Day show in the Bronx.
The thought of a war of emus and rabbits came into my mind...who else should fight but the citizens of Uber? I'm appalled that my post has offended you. I shall repay you by slicing open my wrists and spelling out the name Sphagnum in blood along the porcelain, taking a picture, and posting it here, begging utmost forgiveness.
Submitted by ih8u2man (user info) at 2006-03-03 23:17:54 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Again......
hahahahahahhahahahhhhhahahahahahahahhahahahahahhahahahhhhhahahahahahahahhahahahahahhahahahhhhhahahahahahahah
hahahahahahhahahahhhhhahahahahahahahhahahahahahhahahahhhhhahahahahahahahhahahahahahhahahahhhhhahahahahahahah
hahahahahahhahahahhhhhahahahahahahahhahahahahahhahahahhhhhahahahahahahahhahahahahahhahahahhhhhahahahahahahah
hahahahahahhahahahhhhhahahahahahahahhahahahahahhahahahhhhhahahahahahahahhahahahahahhahahahhhhhahahahahahahah
hahahahahahhahahahhhhhahahahahahahahhahahahahahhahahahhhhhahahahahahahahhahahahahahhahahahhhhhahahahahahahah
hahahahahahhahahahhhhhahahahahahahahvhahahahahahhahahahhhhhahahahahahahahhahahahahahhahahahhhhhahahahahahahah
Submitted by Sphagnum (user info) at 2006-03-03 21:00:59 EST (#)
Ranking: -1
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2006-03-03 15:28:03 (#)
Ranking: 2
Since you OBVIOUSLY have more spare time than pretty much any human I know...see if you can NOW take this and turn it into a short video, complete with audio and a soundtrack.
You can do it...get started on it tonight, since it's rather obvious that you have nothing better to do on a Friday night.
-------
^
:
:
:
The only thing that is funny about this post.
The rest was just dicksuckery and name-dropping.
You need to get out of the house, son.
Submitted by MANICMOTHER (user info) at 2006-03-03 20:59:20 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by Confuzitron (user info) at 2006-03-03 20:29:44 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Yeah... the Electro parts made me laugh something furious.
Submitted by jgreening (user info) at 2006-03-03 20:09:36 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
UberBattle, Part 2?
Dude, I have to be there, -2DIE thong and all.
WHAT?
Submitted by JonnyX (user info) at 2006-03-03 20:06:57 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
yes, you are doing fine
Submitted by Chillax (user info) at 2006-03-03 20:04:20 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
This is so good I don't know where to begin...
Submitted by Quint (user info) at 2006-03-03 18:40:11 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
feumcuks
Submitted by Serious_Melvin (user info) at 2006-03-03 18:39:59 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by Nellypaal (user info) at 2006-03-03 18:28:23 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Oh man...
It's all about Thorpe.
Submitted by Wildman (user info) at 2006-03-03 18:27:06 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Axolotl (user info) at 2006-03-03 17:54:51 (#)
Ranking: 0
I must do a post explaining how my alter just got banned
---------------------------------------------------------
ha ha, i just happened to notice that.
do it right
Submitted by Axolotl (user info) at 2006-03-03 18:11:15 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
I have 2 posts on most heated woooo
Submitted by weasul (user info) at 2006-03-03 17:59:50 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
And I just learned of an Alpaca farm down the road as well. Jesus, my day can't get any better. Well, actually it could.
Submitted by Axolotl (user info) at 2006-03-03 17:54:51 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by scourge (user info) at 2006-03-03 17:44:02 (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Axolotl (user info) at 2006-03-03 17:27:12 (#)
Ranking: 0
Ahh...THAT'S what a woman is...
===
Yes, lovely aren't they? I try to collect them myself, but it's a rather expensive hobby so I only have one and a half of them right now.
I was just joking with you man, sheesh. Now do the scourge - HV battle post on Monday. I'll guarantee enough reviews and shit stirring to get it to at least 3rd most heated.
------------
I must do my Uberhistory 2004 monday. And then 2005, 2006, some stories, a post explaining how my alter just got banned, and some other things.
Battle 2 shall feature you, HV, Forthewin, and some others.
Submitted by Axolotl (user info) at 2006-03-03 17:53:10 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Unabonger (user info) at 2006-03-03 17:39:34 (#)
Ranking: 2
"Show Me Dat C-Section Scar"
featuring axolotl's mom
hilarious.
-----
Blame that one on Orgasmatron.
Submitted by weasul (user info) at 2006-03-03 17:51:12 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Axolotl (user info) at 2006-03-03 17:28:58 (#)
Ranking: 0
EMUS IN CONNETICUT??
===============
Yeah, there's a small farm in Southington.
Submitted by Wildman (user info) at 2006-03-03 17:49:39 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by forthewin (user info) at 2006-03-03 16:58:42 (#)
Ranking: 2
It's posts like this that remind me why I never show my face in Ubersite posts.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
wise you are, young Jedi
---
perfect filename
Submitted by scourge (user info) at 2006-03-03 17:44:02 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Axolotl (user info) at 2006-03-03 17:27:12 (#)
Ranking: 0
Ahh...THAT'S what a woman is...
===
Yes, lovely aren't they? I try to collect them myself, but it's a rather expensive hobby so I only have one and a half of them right now.
I was just joking with you man, sheesh. Now do the scourge - HV battle post on Monday. I'll guarantee enough reviews and shit stirring to get it to at least 3rd most heated.
Submitted by the_lone_stranger (user info) at 2006-03-03 17:40:33 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Yep, this pretty much kicks a lot of ass. Nicely done.
Submitted by Unabonger (user info) at 2006-03-03 17:39:34 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
"Show Me Dat C-Section Scar"
featuring axolotl's mom
hilarious.
Submitted by ledastwins (user info) at 2006-03-03 17:38:44 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Sweet.
Submitted by forthewin (user info) at 2006-03-03 17:36:26 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Axolotl (user info) at 2006-03-03 17:05:55 (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by forthewin (user info) at 2006-03-03 16:58:42 (#)
Ranking: 2
It's posts like this that remind me why I never show my face in Ubersite posts.
--
Why not? Wanna be featured in Uber Battle: Part Two?
___________________
Hey, there's the ones of me with the gas mask. How much more appropriate for a battle can you get?
Submitted by loki (user info) at 2006-03-03 17:29:15 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
auto emu +2
Submitted by Axolotl (user info) at 2006-03-03 17:28:58 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by weasul (user info) at 2006-03-03 17:26:40 (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by leilani (user info) at 2006-03-03 17:11:57 (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by weasul (user info) at 2006-03-03 16:30:06 (#)
Ranking: 2
I live near an emu farm.
--
me too! 5 minutes away in fact. are you my neighbor?
=======================
The one near me is also about 5 minutes away. If you're one of us fellow Connecticut(ers)(ites), then I just may be.
---
EMUS IN CONNETICUT??
Submitted by firefly (user info) at 2006-03-03 17:28:19 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
No Comment
Submitted by Axolotl (user info) at 2006-03-03 17:27:12 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by scourge (user info) at 2006-03-03 17:14:07 (#)
Ranking: 2
Well young Axolotl, many many men find the odd homosexual urge upon viewing my countenance. I'm that damn pretty. Sorry to say I hate all penii but my own, I'll have no truck with them at all. Berjiners on the other hand...well I do count them as my one favoritest item in the entire universe.
The thing is I used a question mark for my own face in that post, are you confused as to what women look like my young friend? If that represents a woman to you maybe that could explain the ghey urges.
Too help out with this, go take a gander at zakalwes last post on the front page. Thats what women look like...
----
Ahh...THAT'S what a woman is...
Submitted by weasul (user info) at 2006-03-03 17:26:40 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by leilani (user info) at 2006-03-03 17:11:57 (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by weasul (user info) at 2006-03-03 16:30:06 (#)
Ranking: 2
I live near an emu farm.
--
me too! 5 minutes away in fact. are you my neighbor?
=======================
The one near me is also about 5 minutes away. If you're one of us fellow Connecticut(ers)(ites), then I just may be.
Submitted by Oxymoron (user info) at 2006-03-03 17:24:43 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
funny shit
Submitted by Doodles (user info) at 2006-03-03 17:18:29 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by FATMANTPK (user info) at 2006-03-03 17:15:42 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
MVA
MVM
B@W
W00T<shift-one>
Submitted by scourge (user info) at 2006-03-03 17:14:07 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Well young Axolotl, many many men find the odd homosexual urge upon viewing my countenance. I'm that damn pretty. Sorry to say I hate all penii but my own, I'll have no truck with them at all. Berjiners on the other hand...well I do count them as my one favoritest item in the entire universe.
The thing is I used a question mark for my own face in that post, are you confused as to what women look like my young friend? If that represents a woman to you maybe that could explain the ghey urges.
Too help out with this, go take a gander at zakalwes last post on the front page. Thats what women look like...
Submitted by leilani (user info) at 2006-03-03 17:11:57 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by weasul (user info) at 2006-03-03 16:30:06 (#)
Ranking: 2
I live near an emu farm.
--
me too! 5 minutes away in fact. are you my neighbor?
Submitted by Susie_Derkins (user info) at 2006-03-03 17:10:39 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
BAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA *dies*
Submitted by Axolotl (user info) at 2006-03-03 17:06:42 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by MistressFist (user info) at 2006-03-03 16:59:02 (#)
Ranking: 2
I'm making this my new stationery. "From the desk of Mrs. Y Helo Thar-Rapesecks"
--------
It might raise some questions among Master Fist.
======================
Nah, he's cool as long as he gets sloppy seconds, and is allowed to keep their heads.
Wah?
---
Wha indeed.
Submitted by Axolotl (user info) at 2006-03-03 17:05:55 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by forthewin (user info) at 2006-03-03 16:58:42 (#)
Ranking: 2
It's posts like this that remind me why I never show my face in Ubersite posts.
--
Why not? Wanna be featured in Uber Battle: Part Two?
Submitted by MistressFist (user info) at 2006-03-03 16:59:02 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
I'm making this my new stationery. "From the desk of Mrs. Y Helo Thar-Rapesecks"
--------
It might raise some questions among Master Fist.
======================
Nah, he's cool as long as he gets sloppy seconds, and is allowed to keep their heads.
Wah?
Submitted by forthewin (user info) at 2006-03-03 16:58:42 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
It's posts like this that remind me why I never show my face in Ubersite posts.
Submitted by Axolotl (user info) at 2006-03-03 16:58:22 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
in the words of Habee, of 123 Peener Avenue, Chicago:
Fuck dis man imo go eat some cake.
Submitted by Axolotl (user info) at 2006-03-03 16:57:53 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by HighVoltage900 (user info) at 2006-03-03 16:55:29 (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Axolotl (user info) at 2006-03-03 16:54:21 (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by scourge (user info) at 2006-03-03 16:52:17 (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Axolotl (user info) at 2006-03-03 16:43:10 (#)
Ranking: 0
You're a woman? I thought for so long you were a guy.
===
I am a guy. <checks contents of boxers> Yup, guy. What the hell are you on about my young Uber historian friend?
-------
Why, nothing...*looks around*
Nevermind.
----
Our dear lord Axolotl is implying that your phalyus is actually a vaginal cavity.
DURRRRRR!!!!
-------
Or perhaps I'm acting out my Freudian desires to make love to Scourge of the Seas...?
Submitted by HighVoltage900 (user info) at 2006-03-03 16:55:29 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Axolotl (user info) at 2006-03-03 16:54:21 (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by scourge (user info) at 2006-03-03 16:52:17 (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Axolotl (user info) at 2006-03-03 16:43:10 (#)
Ranking: 0
You're a woman? I thought for so long you were a guy.
===
I am a guy. <checks contents of boxers> Yup, guy. What the hell are you on about my young Uber historian friend?
-------
Why, nothing...*looks around*
Nevermind.
----
Our dear lord Axolotl is implying that your phalyus is actually a vaginal cavity.
DURRRRRR!!!!
Submitted by Axolotl (user info) at 2006-03-03 16:54:21 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by scourge (user info) at 2006-03-03 16:52:17 (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Axolotl (user info) at 2006-03-03 16:43:10 (#)
Ranking: 0
You're a woman? I thought for so long you were a guy.
===
I am a guy. <checks contents of boxers> Yup, guy. What the hell are you on about my young Uber historian friend?
-------
Why, nothing...*looks around*
Nevermind.
Submitted by Axolotl (user info) at 2006-03-03 16:53:35 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by MistressFist (user info) at 2006-03-03 16:52:25 (#)
Ranking: 2
"Y HELO THAR RAPESEKS?"
I'm making this my new stationery. "From the desk of Mrs. Y Helo Thar-Rapesecks"
--------
It might raise some questions among Master Fist.
Submitted by MistressFist (user info) at 2006-03-03 16:52:25 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
"Y HELO THAR RAPESEKS?"
I'm making this my new stationery. "From the desk of Mrs. Y Helo Thar-Rapesecks"
Submitted by scourge (user info) at 2006-03-03 16:52:17 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Axolotl (user info) at 2006-03-03 16:43:10 (#)
Ranking: 0
You're a woman? I thought for so long you were a guy.
===
I am a guy. <checks contents of boxers> Yup, guy. What the hell are you on about my young Uber historian friend?
Submitted by Axolotl (user info) at 2006-03-03 16:47:11 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by MrSparkle847 (user info) at 2006-03-03 16:46:18 (#)
Ranking: 0
Nice house of peeners. Reminds me a little of a house of mirrors, when people with peeners hanging out are standing behind me.
----
I take it you had a rough childhood.
Submitted by MrSparkle847 (user info) at 2006-03-03 16:46:30 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Whoops. +2.
Submitted by MrSparkle847 (user info) at 2006-03-03 16:46:18 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Nice house of peeners. Reminds me a little of a house of mirrors, when people with peeners hanging out are standing behind me.
Submitted by Axolotl (user info) at 2006-03-03 16:44:32 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by JonnyX (user info) at 2006-03-03 15:42:59 (#)
Ranking: 2
way to name-whore, my friend.
-----------
Ya gotta namewhore, or nobody will know who you're talking aboot.
Submitted by Axolotl (user info) at 2006-03-03 16:43:10 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by scourge (user info) at 2006-03-03 16:39:02 (#)
Ranking: 2
GOD DAMN YOU ORGASMATRON, I SAID NO MORE TO THAT FUCKING POST.
A fight between scourgeoftheseas and HV huh? Careful, Wildfag McBitch might make a post about it.
This post, though, was sheer genius. Almost as good as this very very slightly nsfw batle post http://www.ubersite.com/m/81470
----
You're a woman? I thought for so long you were a guy.
Submitted by Axolotl (user info) at 2006-03-03 16:40:18 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
This post was done entirely in MS Paint.
DERP DERP DERP
Submitted by scourge (user info) at 2006-03-03 16:39:43 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
*battle* post
Submitted by scourge (user info) at 2006-03-03 16:39:02 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
GOD DAMN YOU ORGASMATRON, I SAID NO MORE TO THAT FUCKING POST.
A fight between scourgeoftheseas and HV huh? Careful, Wildfag McBitch might make a post about it.
This post, though, was sheer genius. Almost as good as this very very slightly nsfw batle post http://www.ubersite.com/m/81470
Submitted by Axolotl (user info) at 2006-03-03 16:32:47 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by weasul (user info) at 2006-03-03 16:30:06 (#)
Ranking: 2
I live near an emu farm.
--
How lucky you must be!
Submitted by Axolotl (user info) at 2006-03-03 16:31:17 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by HighVoltage900 (user info) at 2006-03-03 16:22:33 (#)
Ranking: 2
Actually I have another picture of Orgasmatron.
O-man it's the one of you wearing sunglasses and you have a picture beside it where you polarized the colors. I saved it as "HA MOTHER FUCKER I HAVE YOUR FACE NOW! BE READY FOR PEENER!"
--
It is my feeling that Orgasmatron should be beebed.
Submitted by weasul (user info) at 2006-03-03 16:30:06 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
I live near an emu farm.
Submitted by NerfHerder (user info) at 2006-03-03 16:26:47 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Well holy dump on a stump.
Submitted by HighVoltage900 (user info) at 2006-03-03 16:22:33 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Actually I have another picture of Orgasmatron.
O-man it's the one of you wearing sunglasses and you have a picture beside it where you polarized the colors. I saved it as "HA MOTHER FUCKER I HAVE YOUR FACE NOW! BE READY FOR PEENER!"
Submitted by Brdn_Nkd (user info) at 2006-03-03 16:19:55 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by Axolotl (user info) at 2006-03-03 16:18:15 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2006-03-03 14:56:58 (#)
Ranking: 2
The best part about this - besides Shlongy being in it - is that the heads are cut out at random with no attempt at making them look good atop their respective bodies.
----
If I had wanted it to look GOOD, I would have used Photoshop.
I mean come on, I'm not Forthewin here.
.......Please disregard the previous sentence.
Submitted by Axolotl (user info) at 2006-03-03 16:15:41 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Orgasmatron (user info) at 2006-03-03 14:56:07 (#)
Ranking: 2
I knew I should have never made that album cover and uploaded it.
Time to find a better camwhore.
This was.............yeah. This was something, all right.
Something AWESOME.
------------
It was the only picture of you I had to go by.
(nice beard, by the way.)
...
(Attn: ghey menz)
Submitted by Axolotl (user info) at 2006-03-03 16:12:59 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by maxmouse (user info) at 2006-03-03 16:09:09 (#)
Ranking: 2
a masterpiece...it has got everything a post needs to have for it to be considered great (except a hint of rape)
+2
--------
May I direct you to:
"Y HELO THAR RAPESEKS?"
Submitted by Axolotl (user info) at 2006-03-03 16:12:25 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by retrospect (user info) at 2006-03-03 15:05:48 (#)
Ranking: 2
dude, you like LOVE ubersite.
+2 funny, -1 Caulaincourt dying, +1 time and effort= +2
-----
But of course I love Ubersite.
They're like my other, other dysfunctional family.
Submitted by Axolotl (user info) at 2006-03-03 16:11:27 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by HadToBeDone (user info) at 2006-03-03 15:14:49 (#)
Ranking: 2
The emus would win. Of that there is no question.
-------
The emus were overconfident in their victory, and were defeated by Shandy's sperm-stream.
Submitted by maxmouse (user info) at 2006-03-03 16:09:09 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
a masterpiece...it has got everything a post needs to have for it to be considered great (except a hint of rape)
+2
Submitted by Orgasmatron (user info) at 2006-03-03 16:09:01 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Axolotl (user info) at 2006-03-03 16:07:22 (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by HighVoltage900 (user info) at 2006-03-03 15:44:14 (#)
Ranking: 2
Damn you for making me realize how completely insignificant I am on a website which doesn't matter in real life.
DAMN YOU!
----
But you've never camwhored!
Battle of Uber Part 2: HighVoltage duels Scourge
-----
Ah but we all know how that turns out, don't we kiddies?
http://www.ubersite.com/m/83547
Submitted by Axolotl (user info) at 2006-03-03 16:07:22 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by HighVoltage900 (user info) at 2006-03-03 15:44:14 (#)
Ranking: 2
Damn you for making me realize how completely insignificant I am on a website which doesn't matter in real life.
DAMN YOU!
----
But you've never camwhored!
Battle of Uber Part 2: HighVoltage duels Scourge
Submitted by Axolotl (user info) at 2006-03-03 15:57:58 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2006-03-03 15:28:03 (#)
Ranking: 2
Since you OBVIOUSLY have more spare time than pretty much any human I know...see if you can NOW take this and turn it into a short video, complete with audio and a soundtrack.
You can do it...get started on it tonight, since it's rather obvious that you have nothing better to do on a Friday night.
--------
Weep.
As a matter of fact, Mr. Shlong, I'm playing at a St. Patrick's Day show in the Bronx tonight.
Submitted by HighVoltage900 (user info) at 2006-03-03 15:44:14 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Damn you for making me realize how completely insignificant I am on a website which doesn't matter in real life.
DAMN YOU!
Submitted by JonnyX (user info) at 2006-03-03 15:42:59 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
way to name-whore, my friend.
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2006-03-03 15:28:03 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Since you OBVIOUSLY have more spare time than pretty much any human I know...see if you can NOW take this and turn it into a short video, complete with audio and a soundtrack.
You can do it...get started on it tonight, since it's rather obvious that you have nothing better to do on a Friday night.
Submitted by The_taste_of_Monkeys (user info) at 2006-03-03 15:26:39 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
ARGH! Almost TOO funny!
Submitted by Mike00295 (user info) at 2006-03-03 15:22:20 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Sgt. Stumpy had me rolling.
Submitted by Orgasmatron (user info) at 2006-03-03 15:22:20 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
+2 for having me survive.
Submitted by MistressFist (user info) at 2006-03-03 15:16:30 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
God I hate that fucking picture.
Har har fucking great dude. I was bukakked to death....what a perfect demise!
Submitted by HadToBeDone (user info) at 2006-03-03 15:14:49 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
The emus would win. Of that there is no question.
Submitted by CaptainThorns (user info) at 2006-03-03 15:14:15 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
HOLY FUCKING AWESOME
Submitted by retrospect (user info) at 2006-03-03 15:13:33 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by inion_de_trua (user info) at 2006-03-03 15:08:08 (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by retrospect (user info) at 2006-03-03 15:05:48 (#)
Ranking: 2
dude, you like LOVE ubersite.
+2 funny, -1 Caulaincourt dying, +1 time and effort= +2
--------------
dude you can't -1 for caul dying because he died with flare!
======
flare? FLARE? one minute he's stabbing a rabbit, the next he's saying "le gaspe" and bleeding. i will not entertain the idea of a dead caul. no i will NOT!
Submitted by ih8u2man (user info) at 2006-03-03 15:12:31 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Wow. You are truely UBER.
Submitted by inion_de_trua (user info) at 2006-03-03 15:08:08 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by retrospect (user info) at 2006-03-03 15:05:48 (#)
Ranking: 2
dude, you like LOVE ubersite.
+2 funny, -1 Caulaincourt dying, +1 time and effort= +2
--------------
dude you can't -1 for caul dying because he died with flare!
Submitted by jgreening (user info) at 2006-03-03 15:07:10 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
GoldGoldGoldGoldGoldGoldGoldGoldGold
GoldGoldGoldGoldGoldGoldGoldGoldGoldGoldGoldGold
GoldGoldGoldGoldGoldGoldGoldGoldGoldGoldGoldGoldGoldGoldGold
GoldGoldGoldGoldGoldGoldGoldGoldGoldGoldGoldGold
GoldGoldGoldGoldGoldGoldGoldGoldGold
Did I mention this is GOLD?
Submitted by leilani (user info) at 2006-03-03 15:06:34 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
heh.
Submitted by retrospect (user info) at 2006-03-03 15:05:48 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
dude, you like LOVE ubersite.
+2 funny, -1 Caulaincourt dying, +1 time and effort= +2
Submitted by Method (user info) at 2006-03-03 15:04:31 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
This is THE funniest thing I have ever seen on this site. EVAR!!!!
Submitted by ess-arr (user info) at 2006-03-03 15:02:09 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
this has pretty much made my day
Submitted by inion_de_trua (user info) at 2006-03-03 15:01:30 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
hahahha you know it's good of shlongy dumps two +2s on it.
Submitted by inion_de_trua (user info) at 2006-03-03 15:00:37 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
this was so worth looking at/reading the whole fucking thing. man i love your crap.
Submitted by Sacrilicious (user info) at 2006-03-03 14:59:15 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
I heart nerd fights.
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2006-03-03 14:56:58 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
The best part about this - besides Shlongy being in it - is that the heads are cut out at random with no attempt at making them look good atop their respective bodies.
Submitted by _Aries_ (user info) at 2006-03-03 14:56:49 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
THIS IS SHIT
KILL YOURSELF IMMEDIATELY
+2+2+2+2+2 ALL UP IN YA GOOCH
Submitted by Orgasmatron (user info) at 2006-03-03 14:56:07 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
I knew I should have never made that album cover and uploaded it.
Time to find a better camwhore.
This was.............yeah. This was something, all right.
Something AWESOME.
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2006-03-03 14:55:30 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
There's something funny - alright - ALWAYS hilarious about human heads on multiple animals.
Submitted by Orgasmatron (user info) at 2006-03-03 14:55:09 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Oh...................my.
Submitted by Axolotl (user info) at 2006-03-03 14:53:50 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Apologies to PolyamorousAJ for using "bart-bart."
I would have posted this earlier, but the connection I was on wouldn't allow file transfers of over 1mb.