Are Your Kids Naughty? (935 hits)
Category: HumorRating: 0.75 on 22 reviews (Rate this item) (V)
Submitted by beatjunky <prez_ident.at.hotmail.com> (View user info) at 2006-03-06 05:34:34 EST
Do you have kids? If the answer is yes, let me ask you another question. Are you tired of making threats that your kids ignore because they would rather just be naughty? Threats such as "If you don't stop touching the kitty in that way little Mikey I'm going to take your toy away!"?
Well worry no more parents! Here at beatjunky Inc we have come up with the toy little Mikey will really miss! NICOTINE BUNNY!
NICOTINE BUNNY is unique as far as children's toys are concerned as it is the only one on the market that contains an addictive drug!
Give your child NICOTINE BUNNY and watch how well behaved he/she is when you threaten to take it away!
We guarantee ease of continued use with our patented NICOTINE REFILL SEPOSITORY! (Sold separately)
So give NICOTINE BUNNY to your child today, you'll be amazed with the results.
User Reviews
Submitted by jeveuxgagner (user info) at 2006-03-14 07:02:41 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by erosion_rules (user info) at 2006-03-13 10:49:43 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
No Comment
Submitted by beatjunky (user info) at 2006-03-06 08:08:51 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Nellypaal (user info) at 2006-03-06 07:22:33 (#)
Ranking: 1
Could take off when the smoking ban comes in all of 20 days.
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Hey like I said sepository sold seperately, if you don't use it on the rabbit that's your choice...
Submitted by AsshOly (user info) at 2006-03-06 07:42:31 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
And if you're lucky, your children will hurry up and die faster than if they weren't afflicted with gripping drug addiction. Here's to hope.
Submitted by HighVoltage900 (user info) at 2006-03-06 07:33:23 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
That did make me smile.
You know why kids are so damn unruly? They aren't nearly as afraid of communists as they should be. I haven't left my bunker/basement for years cause I'm waiting for the Reds to invade.
Submitted by Nellypaal (user info) at 2006-03-06 07:22:33 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
Could take off when the smoking ban comes in all of 20 days.
Submitted by beatjunky (user info) at 2006-03-06 05:59:04 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by redskieslookfake (user info) at 2006-03-06 05:58:11 (#)
Ranking: 1
Submitted by beatjunky (user info) at 2006-03-06 05:57:20 (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by DizzyMissus (user info) at 2006-03-06 05:55:03 (#)
Ranking: 1
Where can I buy one?!
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Here - www.lemonparty.org
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eBay is good too.
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although we don't offer a guarantee unless you buy straight from beatjunky Inc
Submitted by redskieslookfake (user info) at 2006-03-06 05:58:11 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
Submitted by beatjunky (user info) at 2006-03-06 05:57:20 (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by DizzyMissus (user info) at 2006-03-06 05:55:03 (#)
Ranking: 1
Where can I buy one?!
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Here - www.lemonparty.org
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eBay is good too.
Submitted by beatjunky (user info) at 2006-03-06 05:57:20 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by DizzyMissus (user info) at 2006-03-06 05:55:03 (#)
Ranking: 1
Where can I buy one?!
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Here - www.lemonparty.org
Submitted by redskieslookfake (user info) at 2006-03-06 05:56:14 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
Submitted by DizzyMissus (user info) at 2006-03-06 05:55:03 (#)
Ranking: 1
Where can I buy one?!
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If you watched Berty's TV show you'd know as they are the official sponsors. Plus it's in the ad breaks too.
Submitted by DizzyMissus (user info) at 2006-03-06 05:55:03 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
Where can I buy one?!
Submitted by redskieslookfake (user info) at 2006-03-06 05:53:54 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
Submitted by Berty (user info) at 2006-03-06 05:49:39 (#)
Ranking: 0
I'm too un-photogenic for television. I'm not witty enough for radio.
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That's why I've put you next to Tarbuck. She'd make you look slim and sharp - you could wear a suit and put your hair in a 1980's health nut executive pony tail. Also, LT laughs at everything. So you'd appear wittier, cleverer and altogether funnier. Plus Jimmy Tarbuck would be in the audience shouting 'that's a cracker!'
Furthermore, Daniels and McGee would appear on a giant screen and you could mouth 'wankers' at them. You'd be a national legend!
Submitted by beatjunky (user info) at 2006-03-06 05:52:21 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
I agree with Red, smacking never did me any harm, unless you count my retarded Uber posts...
Submitted by Berty (user info) at 2006-03-06 05:49:39 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
I'm too un-photogenic for television. I'm not witty enough for radio.
Submitted by redskieslookfake (user info) at 2006-03-06 05:48:52 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
Submitted by Berty (user info) at 2006-03-06 05:46:12 (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by redskieslookfake (user info) at 2006-03-06 05:40:59 (#)
Ranking: 1
I'm as liberal as the next guy - but sometimes a good smack IS the best way to let your kid know that what they have done is wrong.
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NO NO NO NO NO NO NO! Children learn by example, not by concepts. By smacking them all you teach the child is that it's okay to use violence when you're angry with someone.
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Pavlov, crumbly meranguey bloke that he was - behaviour modification. Do this - get this.
Also if you say 'this hurts me more than it hurts you son' then it's ok.
Submitted by redskieslookfake (user info) at 2006-03-06 05:47:37 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
Submitted by redskieslookfake (user info) at 2006-03-06 04:48:33 (#)
Ranking: -1
Berty - I am now going to make it my mission to get *you* a TV show. You'll have to share the stage with Lisa Tarbuck and pay Ted 'Paul' Daniels to do an appearance via TV link every week with Debbie McGee in the background clearly touching herself. Sadly old Ted will get paid more than you do, and you'll have to endure the fact that whenever Lisa Tarbuck laughs while wearing a skirt, her head thrown back in merriment you will be able to clearly see her badly packed kebab - but it is a small price to pay for the Berty Lisa Tarbuck show.
I have high hopes for the BLT show.
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I repeat.
Submitted by Berty (user info) at 2006-03-06 05:46:12 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by redskieslookfake (user info) at 2006-03-06 05:40:59 (#)
Ranking: 1
I'm as liberal as the next guy - but sometimes a good smack IS the best way to let your kid know that what they have done is wrong.
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NO NO NO NO NO NO NO! Children learn by example, not by concepts. By smacking them all you teach the child is that it's okay to use violence when you're angry with someone.
Submitted by Berty (user info) at 2006-03-06 05:43:48 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
I smoke a healthy amount of nicotene. I'm actually in a very good mood.
If I'm not here to maintain the standards, what would become of us all? It'd be like if that big kid who's parents got divorced never beat up Jeremy Clark every day. Sure Jeremy may have gone on to make some friends or do better academically but he'd only succeed in making some girl very unhappy with his boring nature.
Submitted by redskieslookfake (user info) at 2006-03-06 05:40:59 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
I'm as liberal as the next guy - but sometimes a good smack IS the best way to let your kid know that what they have done is wrong.
Submitted by beatjunky (user info) at 2006-03-06 05:39:31 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
I think he may have bypassed the bunny and just used the refill sepository...
Submitted by redskieslookfake (user info) at 2006-03-06 05:38:36 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
Berty is just grumpy coz he is on the nicotine bunny now.
Submitted by Berty (user info) at 2006-03-06 05:37:42 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
I just touch their genitals and tell them that if anyone finds out about our secret everyone will be very cross with them and mummy won't love them anymore. Keeps them introverted and quiet.
Needed more je ne sais quois.