An Unexpected Conversation At Dawn (1512 hits)
Category: NoneLabels: monster
Rating: 1.82 on 44 reviews (Rate this item) (V)
Submitted by Stagger Lee (View user info) at 2006-03-06 06:07:08 EST
Part the First
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There was a monster in my kitchen less than two hours ago. He is gone now, but I fancy I can still smell him, somewhere. Perhaps it is more of a taste in the air. Yes, I feel that is more accurate. A taste.
This is what happened.
I arose and donned a dressing gown. I prefer simple, white dressing gowns of high quality. We must have standards, yet being ostentatious is also hardly acceptable. I made my way downstairs, where I set about making myself breakfast. My house is set on a hill, quite a way back from the road. I enjoy my solitude. My house and kitchen are well maintained and comfortable without being too luxurious. Again, I must stress that standards are important, but that it does not do to throw one's weight around.
The sky visible through my kitchen window was only just brightening above my hedge. Light was just beginning to reflect off the roof of my garden shed. As I busied myself turning on the stove and retrieving some eggs from my refrigerator, I distinctly heard somebody clear their throat. I spun and seized my frying pan. Eggs fell and cracked upon my floor.
The monster was sitting at my kitchen table, calmly observing me. This is what he looked like: he was no taller than I, perhaps six feet in height. He had pale blue eyes and even paler white skin. There was an unwholesome quality to his skin, an indefinable quality that was extremely repulsive and unsettling. His teeth were unnaturally sharp. However, it is those eyes that I return to in my thoughts, over and over again, filled matchless calm and sorrow.
I also remember how they looked at the end of it all.
"Good morning," he said. That voice. It was normal, it was human, and yet somehow it was poisonous and insidious. I remember thinking that if somehow an insect, one that lived in the blind shadow of a dampened rock, were to be given a voice, then it would sound like this.
I brandished my frying pan, and my hand shook with fear. I would be afraid of any unexpected intruder, naturally, but he elicited an instant loathing and terror from me that an average intruder would be hard pressed to match.
"My apologies for startling you," he continued, staring at me straight in the eyes, "But had I come to the door, you surely would not have granted me an entrance. Hence my abrupt appearance in your kitchen."
His entire demeanour was one of calm authority and quiet assurance. The words he spoke were friendly and reassuring. Yet I found myself afraid, and slightly disgusted, at his appearance and at the sound of his voice.
"Come, sit," he said. There was the faintest hint of command to his voice now.
Convinced that, whatever his purpose may be, he wished me no harm, I did as he bade, and sat at my table. I laid the frying pan down. The matter of the broken eggs nagged at me, but I attempted to put that out of my mind.
"What..." helplessly, I flapped my hands, and a lump seemed to form in my throat. I coughed and went on. "What do you want from me?"
The monster smiled, and I glimpsed those unnaturally sharp teeth. "Why, I want merely to talk," he replied. "Is that not acceptable? I wish merely to speak to you, to tell you a tale, if you will. Then I shall be on my way."
I have a confession to make at this juncture in my story: I am an avid collector of tales of all kinds. I have a library within the walls of my house, a library of many books in which I have written folk tales, old wives' tales, tales of the sea imparted to me by the grizzled fisherman down at the docks, campfire stories, tales that people made up while I spoke to them. I travel and always travel with my notebooks to record any stories that people might happen to voice to me.
So, naturally, when the monster announced that he had a tale to tell, my curiosity was instantly engaged. I leaned forward, momentarily forgetting my repulsion and said eagerly, "But of course! Please, do not hesitate to spin me your tale!" Then I remembered the thing that I was leaning towards and I recoiled, back into my seat.
This did not pass unnoticed. The monster smiled once more, however, now the expression had a grim, foreboding cast to it. "I disgust you, do I not?" he asked. It was not really a question.
I spluttered and could not answer. For I wanted to hear his tale, and I feared if I offended him, he would leave with his tale unspun. Or worse, I feared he would injure my person, perhaps even kill me.
However, he did not immediately take umbrage at my reaction. Instead, he seemed to simply grow in sorrow. He nodded his bald head. "It is not unexpected. I experience the same reaction from most people. In part, that is what my tale regards. It is a true story; it concerns my life."
I stood from the table. "May I fetch my writing materials, so that I can record your tale?" I asked him.
"But of course," he said, and he gestured in a manner which I suspect was supposed to indicate generosity. "By all means."
I moved quickly out of the room. I was amazed by the freshness and clarity of the air in my hallway. The abomination sitting in my kitchen was tainting the air, I reasoned. I entered my study and quickly snatched up my notebook and pen. Despite my uninvited guest's unwholesome appearance, I was eager to hear his words, to absorb and file his tale.
I returned to the kitchen, and I was struck by the nature of the air. I had not noticed it when I first descended the stairs to make my breakfast, so perhaps I had still been half sleeping. Perhaps he had only just arrived. Upon entering the kitchen now, however, the air was stale and noisome. As I tried to breathe my throat insisted on closing. I gagged and choked, finally doubling over. My writing materials spilled from my hands onto the floor. I stood with my hands on my knees and coughed.
The monster observed this with a bemused cast to his features. He did not appear to know why I was coughing, nor why I could not breathe.
Eventually I regained control of my wayward body and stood upright once more. I retrieved my notebook and pen from the floor and returned to my seat opposite the monster. I opened my notebook to a fresh page, and poised my pen. I looked at the monster expectantly.
He enquired, "Are you suffering from some form of malady?"
"Pardon? Oh...the coughing...no, I do not understand what came over me." I was unwilling to reveal the extent of my reaction to his very presence in the room.
"Then may I proceed?"
"You may," I old him.
And then the monster spun me a tale.
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Note: I checked the uber time, and I believe this is more than a day after my last submission. My last submission is still on the front page, though, so I don't know if this is frowned on or not. My apologies if it is.
User Reviews
Submitted by zwerg (user info) at 2007-05-16 14:44:24 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Really good, now I will read the rest.
Submitted by hour_man (user info) at 2006-07-06 10:03:04 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I hate it when people know what I like
Submitted by darko (user info) at 2006-06-21 02:15:49 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I don't like you, but Orgasmatron does.
Submitted by Jack_McCallum (user info) at 2006-05-09 16:36:08 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Reviewed in last chapter...
Submitted by Stagger_Lee (user info) at 2006-04-07 13:51:30 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Thanks, guys.
Submitted by Crystle (user info) at 2006-03-15 15:47:25 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Davros (user info) at 2006-03-11 11:50:50 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
I like this.
Apologies for coming to it late, but I will persist.
-Dave
Submitted by HighVoltage900 (user info) at 2006-03-07 20:56:28 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Gonna help out with your retal problem ma'am. Don't pay me no mind.
Submitted by Stagger_Lee (user info) at 2006-03-07 20:43:18 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by trent_nz (user info) at 2006-03-07 20:37:42 (#)
Ranking: -2
dick fuck
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Cogent, constructive, (retaliatory) criticism. Thank you.
Submitted by trent_nz (user info) at 2006-03-07 20:37:42 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
dick fuck
Submitted by SilvrWolf (user info) at 2006-03-07 09:44:32 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by thecaes (user info) at 2006-03-07 07:51:55 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
I like how the narrator is kind of quirky and stuffy. I like the style you're telling the story in, because it's different.
This was really good.
Submitted by Stagger_Lee (user info) at 2006-03-07 04:50:22 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
I don't have any proper coats, which is a shame.
Submitted by charminglybeef (user info) at 2006-03-07 04:24:28 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Hey, screw you, Stagger.
I'm learning from your posts. Your mistakes are going to be my triumphs.
Until then, enjoy your glory -- I'm hot on your coat-tails!
Submitted by Stagger_Lee (user info) at 2006-03-07 03:21:50 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by charminglybeef (user info) at 2006-03-07 03:05:34 (#)
Ranking: 2
Stagger_Lee, I'll jump on the bandwagon and call you an alter. Orgasmatron's, even. If only it wasn't so clear that Orgasmatron couldn't write in paragraph form even if the devil demanded it for return of his meter and rhyme.
You know too well what to post to not have done this before.
Regardless, this is excellent.
---------------------------------
Well, that's a compliment and a half, I guess.
Submitted by Circe (user info) at 2006-03-07 03:17:33 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Coyote
I can imagine Steve Buscemi in my kitchen kind of helplessly polluting the air and feeling a little awkward about it.
________
Good call.
Submitted by charminglybeef (user info) at 2006-03-07 03:05:34 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Stagger_Lee, I'll jump on the bandwagon and call you an alter. Orgasmatron's, even. If only it wasn't so clear that Orgasmatron couldn't write in paragraph form even if the devil demanded it for return of his meter and rhyme.
You know too well what to post to not have done this before.
Regardless, this is excellent.
Submitted by Coyote (user info) at 2006-03-06 23:26:01 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
I'd like to see more of this!
I like a strongly drawn character, and a monster with a story.
For some reason I'm seeing this played by James Cromwell (staggeringly dignified old guy who happens to be quite amoral, e.g., the police captain in LA Confidential) and Steve Buscemi. I can imagine Steve Buscemi in my kitchen kind of helplessly polluting the air and feeling a little awkward about it.
Submitted by Stagger_Lee (user info) at 2006-03-06 22:53:26 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Cough *shameless self-promotion* anyone who thought it was too short can go read my pulp fiction series. Just to pass the time, you know.
Submitted by Stagger_Lee (user info) at 2006-03-06 22:50:25 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by MyTeeOne (user info) at 2006-03-06 16:54:51 (#)
Ranking: 1
I liked this, but it ended as soon as it got going. I had just gotten sucked in and WHAM-O, it was over.
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Sorry, man. It's a cliffhanger, see? The next episode will be longer. Indeed, this fucker's getting out of hand on me.
Submitted by Blinkish (user info) at 2006-03-06 22:50:20 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
ubmitted by MyTeeOne (user info) at 2006-03-06 16:54:51 (#)
Ranking: 1
I liked this, but it ended as soon as it got going. I had just gotten sucked in and WHAM-O, it was over.
Exactly what I thought
Submitted by Orgasmatron (user info) at 2006-03-06 22:47:22 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Auto +2 "Balls!"
Submitted by Stagger_Lee (user info) at 2006-03-06 22:38:48 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by JonnyX (user info) at 2006-03-06 16:29:34 (#)
Ranking: 2
Is his name Sully, perchance?
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I don't get it.
Submitted by Stagger_Lee (user info) at 2006-03-06 22:21:51 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
Aha! I've +2'd my own post for the first time! Balls!
Submitted by Stagger_Lee (user info) at 2006-03-06 22:21:16 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by ghola (user info) at 2006-03-06 19:15:58 (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Stagger_Lee (user info) at 2006-03-06 09:13:43 (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Orgasmatron (user info) at 2006-03-06 08:49:12 (#)
Ranking: 2
Damn I write good prose.
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this explains alot.
i think?
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Or does it?
Nobody knows.
Submitted by ghola (user info) at 2006-03-06 19:15:58 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Stagger_Lee (user info) at 2006-03-06 09:13:43 (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Orgasmatron (user info) at 2006-03-06 08:49:12 (#)
Ranking: 2
Damn I write good prose.
--------
this explains alot.
i think?
Submitted by scourge (user info) at 2006-03-06 18:47:30 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
email sent
Submitted by MyTeeOne (user info) at 2006-03-06 18:02:58 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
MyTee- I'm going to be in the Chicago metro area for my job over the weekend. You think you might want to grab a beer or two one night?
=====================================================================
Sounds good. Saturday is my buddies b-day, but I think his wife is doing something romantic for him. I should be free unless she changes her mind. My_tee_one.at.hotmail.com
Submitted by scourge (user info) at 2006-03-06 17:24:08 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Stagger_Lee (user info) at 2006-03-06 09:13:43 (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Orgasmatron (user info) at 2006-03-06 08:49:12 (#)
Ranking: 2
Damn I write good prose.
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You the man.
==========
Ha ha smartasses. Or smartass. Either way.
This was excellent work, old chum.
MyTee- I'm going to be in the Chicago metro area for my job over the weekend. You think you might want to grab a beer or two one night?
Submitted by MyTeeOne (user info) at 2006-03-06 16:54:51 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
I liked this, but it ended as soon as it got going. I had just gotten sucked in and WHAM-O, it was over.
Submitted by JonnyX (user info) at 2006-03-06 16:29:34 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Is his name Sully, perchance?
Submitted by inion_de_trua (user info) at 2006-03-06 15:02:07 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
this needs to get continued faster.
Submitted by Sacrilicious (user info) at 2006-03-06 10:28:29 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Stagger_Lee (user info) at 2006-03-06 09:13:43 (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Orgasmatron (user info) at 2006-03-06 08:49:12 (#)
Ranking: 2
Damn I write good prose.
------------------
You the man.
==========
Sigh. You just can't help yourself. I mean, selves.
Very promising, Stagger. I really enjoy your writing.
Submitted by Susie_Derkins (user info) at 2006-03-06 09:47:29 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Great start, looking forward to reading part the second.
Submitted by Maddog (user info) at 2006-03-06 09:24:05 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
I like it.
Submitted by Stagger_Lee (user info) at 2006-03-06 09:13:43 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Orgasmatron (user info) at 2006-03-06 08:49:12 (#)
Ranking: 2
Damn I write good prose.
------------------
You the man.
Submitted by simple_catalyst (user info) at 2006-03-06 09:08:53 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
a;sgdlhorea[igh
^
constructive criticism.
Submitted by Orgasmatron (user info) at 2006-03-06 08:49:12 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Damn I write good prose.
Submitted by Nellypaal (user info) at 2006-03-06 07:14:45 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
"being ostentatious is also hardly acceptable"
Rubbish!
Good start - looking forward to the rest.
Submitted by Stagger_Lee (user info) at 2006-03-06 06:39:22 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by redskieslookfake (user info) at 2006-03-06 06:12:17 (#)
Ranking: 2
Right - bollocks - now I'm gonna have to write something.
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I live to inspire.
Submitted by Stagger_Lee (user info) at 2006-03-06 06:38:18 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Method (user info) at 2006-03-06 06:13:12 (#)
Ranking: 1
This was good, but something's a little off. Can't quite put my finger on it, but it is 6 AM and I'm still fuckin half asleep. I'll come back and properly lambast you later.
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By all means.
Submitted by Method (user info) at 2006-03-06 06:13:12 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
This was good, but something's a little off. Can't quite put my finger on it, but it is 6 AM and I'm still fuckin half asleep. I'll come back and properly lambast you later.
Submitted by redskieslookfake (user info) at 2006-03-06 06:12:17 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Right - bollocks - now I'm gonna have to write something.
Submitted by redskieslookfake (user info) at 2006-03-06 06:10:57 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Intriguing and unsettling. It is somewhat reminiscent of Stoker's Dracula. The monster need not be clawed and fanged to be revulsive.