What's Wrong? (575 hits)
Category: NoneRating: 1.5 on 17 reviews (Rate this item) (V)
Submitted by ScotchTape (View user info) at 2006-03-09 12:45:11 EST
"So does anyone know what's been up with Anna lately?"
That was the topic of conversation of the past few days, and today was no different. Three employees, Veronica, Bill, and Dawn, sat in the plain white break room, gossiping away over old coffee and microwave popcorn.
"I don't know what's going on. She's gotten really quiet this week," Bill stated, matter-of-factly.
"Do you think her husband finally left her?" Veronica whispered.
"Veronica! That's an awful thing to say!" Dawn exclaimed.
"Hey, it could be true. I heard he cheats on her with the new babysitter, and when he was drunk at the Christmas party, he was complaining to Mike about how she's so frigid..."
"Stop that. Honestly though, have you noticed how pale she's gotten? And I rarely see her eat." Dawn added.
"She never got that bonus last month, you know. I heard she really needed it, too. Maybe she's stressed out." Bill chimed in.
"Who knows what is wrong with that girl," Veronica turned to the door, "oh shhh, here she comes."
Anna trudged into the break room sluggishly and walked towards the coffee maker, stopping in front of it. Her clothes, the same ones she had been wearing since Monday, were wrinkled and beginning to carry an unpleasant odor. Her hair once in a tight, clean bun was now disheveled. She slowly grabbed a mug, stopping as she looked at the empty pot. Slowly turning around, she trudged back to the door.
"Um, hi Anna, how's it going? That Swanson project coming through okay?" Dawn said, trying to sound as if they hadn't just been gossiping about their coworker. Anna slowly turned her head to the three of them, entirely expressionless and her eyes glazed over, and opened her mouth to speak. They all leaned forward in anticipation for their coworker to speak for the first time in three days.
"Mm." Anna turned back around and trudged out, back to her cubicle.
"She is so out of it." Veronica said, shaking her head. "If she goes postal, I seriously hope I don't get shot first."
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"Ahem."
Anna, sitting in her bland grey cubicle, turned from her computer and made direct, yet blank, eye contact with her boss, Mr. Henderson, who peered over the edge of the fake wall.
"Anna, I want to talk to you about your performance lately. You didn't get that report to me when I asked you to, you don't comment in meetings, and well, I just don't see you contributing at the level which we expect of our employees. Because of your performance before, I am going to assume that maybe there is something wrong. I have taken the liberty to make an appointment with Human Resources for you. Maybe we can work this out, mmk? Alright, you need to go this afternoon at one, and why don't you come see me afterwards. Ok. I'll see you later. Oh, and I'll need that report for Dirk in accounting by Friday afternoon, alright? Thanks so much."
"Mm."
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"Hi Anna! Well, this is your first time down here with us, isn't it?" exclaimed Barbara, the HR lady. Anna just stared at the floor, as they both sat in a bright room filled with pastels, and assorted posters with animals and motivational slogans.
"I hear you haven't been much of a team player lately. Well I am just so sorry to hear that. We really like our teammates here at GeneriCorps, and when someone begins to lag behind, that hurts the company as a whole, not just your immediate coworkers. We really want to see you get out of this funk you seem to be in. Is stress getting to you? Are you having a hard time balancing family with work? Here, I have some pamphlets you can read on the subject, and hey, why not take this complimentary stress ball with the GeneriCorps logo? Now, really let's talk about this. I know this can be overwhelming to open up to a stranger but its ok. You are in a good place and I want you to feel like you can talk here. So what is bothering you? Are you feeling like we aren't providing you with enough motivation? Do you not like the environment anymore, or maybe it's a coworker. Tell me Anna, what can we do for you? What is it that you want from us?"
Anna slowly raised her head and looked straight at Barbara with pale eyes.
"Brrraaaaaaaaiiiiinnnnsss..."
User Reviews
Submitted by r0fl (user info) at 2006-03-17 00:34:44 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Finally done. http://www.ubersite.com/m/85456
Submitted by MichelleNJ (user info) at 2006-03-10 08:11:32 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
I laughed.
Submitted by Sicknote (user info) at 2006-03-10 01:20:08 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by extacy_red (user info) at 2006-03-09 22:35:33 (#)
Ranking: 2
Zombies rule.
You should all buy the zombie survival guide.
==============================
My mum bought me it for Christmas. My mum rocks.
Zombies scare the fuck out of me. I watched Night of the Living Dead III when I was young and impressionable and have never been the same...
Submitted by ScotchTape (user info) at 2006-03-10 01:05:06 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by extacy_red (user info) at 2006-03-09 22:35:33 (#)
Ranking: 2
Zombies rule.
You should all buy the zombie survival guide.
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Already on the list of books I need to get :)
Submitted by extacy_red (user info) at 2006-03-09 22:35:33 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Zombies rule.
You should all buy the zombie survival guide.
http://www.amazon.com/gp/product/1400049628/sr=8-1/qid=1141961693/ref=sr_1_1/104-6021137-8675115?%5Fencoding=UTF8
http://www.ubersite.com/m/85121
Submitted by precision (user info) at 2006-03-09 18:41:03 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
zombies...didn't see that one coming
Submitted by Susie_Derkins (user info) at 2006-03-09 16:03:58 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
aaaah ZPT lives
Submitted by JMG114 (user info) at 2006-03-09 15:00:23 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
Saved by the last line. I think I know where she works.
Submitted by CaptainThorns (user info) at 2006-03-09 14:12:01 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
Hehheh
Submitted by leilani (user info) at 2006-03-09 14:10:14 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Hilarity_Ensues (user info) at 2006-03-09 13:29:42 (#)
Ranking: 1
Send more paramedics
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AHAHAHAHAHA YES
that has to be one of my favorite movies EVAR
Submitted by ruthless (user info) at 2006-03-09 13:54:54 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
Awesome
Submitted by Hilarity_Ensues (user info) at 2006-03-09 13:29:42 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
Send more paramedics
Submitted by agagnon (user info) at 2006-03-09 13:23:22 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
Got me at the end, didn't see the zombie angle coming in.
Submitted by Stagger_Lee (user info) at 2006-03-09 13:12:06 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
No Further Comment
Submitted by ScotchTape (user info) at 2006-03-09 13:07:23 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by simple_catalyst (user info) at 2006-03-09 13:03:45 (#)
Ranking: 2
i dreamed about zombies and ninjas last night/this morning...
w00t?
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Yes, w00t indeed. I wish I dreamt of zombies more often than I do.
Submitted by simple_catalyst (user info) at 2006-03-09 13:03:45 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
i dreamed about zombies and ninjas last night/this morning...
w00t?
Submitted by leilani (user info) at 2006-03-09 12:53:03 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
I wish for a turkey sandwich on rye bread with lettuce and mustard. And
-- and I don't want any zombie turkeys, I don't want to turn into a turkey
myself, and I don't want any other weird surprises -- you got it?
-- Homer Simpson
Treehouse of Horror II